Lost That Lovin' Feeling: A Short Prequel

  *****

  Tracy had lunch all ready for them when they arrived. She’d made two dishes. Both the chicken chili and the creamy New England clam chowder were perfect for a February day with temperatures hovering around eighteen degrees. They ate at the informal dining nook of the spacious second-floor private living area, joined only by eighteen-month-old Kylie, Tracy’s daughter. Kylie had been born six months after Tracy’s husband, Keith Norwood, was inaugurated as governor.

  Keith was at his office at the State Capitol, while Tracy’s eleven-year-old son from her first marriage, Gabe Pegram, was at school. There were two other children in the blended Pegram/Norwood family. Tracy’s daughter, Amber Pegram, as well as Keith’s son, Josh Norwood, both attended a private high school up in Lake County and boarded there.

  Josh, along with his father and grandfather, had witnessed the car crash that killed his mother and grandmother. The taxi in which the women were riding collided with a gas truck as they drove to the airport for the flight home after a vacation. Keith, Josh, and Keith’s father-in-law rode in a second taxi behind them. The emotional problems stemming from the trauma of seeing the fiery crash led to Josh acting out. One day he’d taken his grandfather’s car without permission—he only had a learner’s permit at the time—and, was rushing to get home before he was discovered, and ran over little Gabe Pegram in the parking lot of the library, breaking his leg.

  Tierney knew about the hit-and-run, but she hadn’t known the identity of the driver. As far as she knew at the time, the police hadn’t found the person who ran over Gabe. She also knew that Tracy started seeing someone after Gabe’s leg healed, for Tracy had confided that her ex-husband, Clint, didn’t like her dating and was giving her a hard time. But Tracy only identified the man as the widowed father of one of Amber’s friends.

  Tierney had been floored several months later when Tracy told her she was getting married and asked her to be matron of honor. With a secrecy Tierney found both uncharacteristic and puzzling, Tracy refused to reveal the name of the groom, citing a need to avoid media leaks. That told Tierney that her friend was marrying someone well known, but not until she and Steven arrived at an impressively large suburban home in Gurnee did Tracy inform them that she was marrying Keith Norwood, the gubernatorial candidate. She apologetically explained that they tried to keep their romance quiet because of the publicity it would receive.

  Tierney believed Tracy’s story, but just days after the ceremony, a scandalous story broke that it was all a sham, simply to cover up a private settlement Keith made to Tracy after Josh ran Gabe down. His opponent immediately jumped on it, and it became a hot topic, with people at the office divided…some saying it was a business arrangement to buy Tracy’s silence, others saying how romantic it was that two people who’d met under such hostile circumstances had managed to fall in love. With some brilliant PR on the part of Keith’s staff, Tracy was shown to the public and made a brief statement, declined to answer any questions, and retreated to the background, seen just enough to satisfy the public’s curiosity, but not enough to smack of exploitation.

  At the office Tierney had spoken out in her friend’s defense, but she really didn’t know what to think. She desperately wanted to believe that Tracy and Keith had fallen in love, but she wasn’t sure. Keith Norwood was rich, and Tracy was a divorced mother struggling to keep the bills paid. She’d had it even worse than Tierney, for not only did her ex-husband rarely contribute due to an irregular income, but Tracy had a lower-paying job than Tierney and therefore less funds with which to support her family. Shortly after the accident Tracy and her children had moved into a rented house, with Tracy saying the owners had been frantic for a tenant and agreed to the lower rent she offered. Tierney didn’t find out until after the accusations of a deal were made public that the house was owned by Keith Norwood, whose personal fortune was in real estate. Tierney felt hurt that her friend had lied to her, not only about the driver of the car that ran Gabe down and about the circumstances under which she’d moved, but also regarding the details about the house rental, as well as the identity of the man she was dating. When she asked Tracy about it, Tracy repeated that she and Keith chose to keep the details of their courtship private. Tierney, wanting to preserve their friendship, wisely didn’t press the issue.

  The scandal, although damaging, had not been enough to defeat Keith, whose concern for the less fortunate residents of the state had made him popular with voters. The Norwoods, who appeared publicly for the first time at a candidate debate, made an attractive, appealing couple who had genuine chemistry; and their children, also present, were obviously fond of each other. The entire blended family appeared so natural and relaxed that it was difficult to believe the marriage was anything but the real thing. Widely published, candid photos of Tracy and Keith being affectionate over dinner at a rooftop Chicago restaurant, taken by a reporter equipped with a long-distance lens who wanted to capture their interaction without their awareness, also helped their cause. Regardless, the validity of the Norwood marriage continued to be debated in the court of public opinion, finally fading the following spring, when Tracy announced her pregnancy.

  Whatever the true circumstances behind the marriage, Tracy certainly looked happy as she spoon-fed her daughter. Tierney found herself feeling a little envious of her friend.

  “Keith was sorry he couldn’t take today off,” Tracy said apologetically. “He had some important meetings scheduled. But he did say he’d try to leave early.”

  “Maybe it would have been better if we waited and came tomorrow,” Steven observed.

  “No, no, we wanted you to come today,” Tracy replied. “Considering that you’ll probably leave early Sunday afternoon, driving down on Friday means you’ll have two full days here. If you waited until tomorrow, it would be only twenty-four hours,” she reasoned. She smiled at Steven. “Besides, Tierney tells me you want to see the Lincoln museum.”

  A grin spread over his face. “Yeah, I’ve been wanting to get down here to see it from the time it opened. They covered it in the local news. I love interactive exhibits like the ones they have.”

  “I suggested that he go to the museum this afternoon, Tracy,” Tierney explained. “Sienna and I will go with him tomorrow to see the house Lincoln and his family lived in and the law office where he worked. So not only will you and I get a chance to dish this afternoon, but Sienna won’t be bored by spending all afternoon in a museum. It shouldn’t take long to see the rest of the Lincoln buildings.”

  “Sounds like a plan,” Tracy replied. “I’ve been to them all, of course, and I found them fascinating. But why don’t you leave Sienna here with me tomorrow afternoon? You’re right to expect her to be bored. I’m not even sure kids her age are allowed to go through the Lincoln house.”

  Tierney and Steven exchanged a glance. “We don’t want to put you out, Tracy,” he said.

  “You wouldn’t be. It’s wonderful for Kylie to have a playmate. I can take them to Chuck E. Cheese for pizza and games. Gabe will probably tag along, too.”

  Sienna’s ears picked up on the name of the fun place children loved. “Ooh, Chuck E. Cheese!”

  Tierney laughed. “Uh-oh. You’re in for it now.”

  “Would you like to go there with Kylie and me tomorrow, Sienna, while your parents go look at some boring old buildings?” Tracy asked. At the child’s enthusiastic nod, she grinned and said, “There. It’s all settled.”

  “That’s sweet of you, Tracy,” Tierney said. She looked about the sprawling rooms of the private living quarters. “I’m still trying to adjust to our being here. It’s pretty incredible to think that the governor and first lady of Illinois are personal friends of ours,” Tierney said. “Just think, we’re sitting here in the Governor’s Mansion, having lunch with people who actually know the President of the United States and the First Lady.”

  “Keith knows them. I, on the other hand, have only met them,” Tracy clarified. “There’s a big difference.”
/>
  “Six degrees of separation,” Steven mumbled. Speaking more clearly, he added, “It was real nice of you and Keith to invite us down, Tracy.”

  “Well, it’s pretty exciting for us to be able to say that the creator and writer of an upcoming cable drama—a surefire hit, I might add—is a personal friend of ours,” Tracy countered. “This is a huge event, and we couldn’t let it go unobserved.” With a smile at Steven, she said, “Who knows? You might get to know that other Hollywood big shot with the initials S.S.”

  “Spielberg?” he guessed, grinning.

  “That’s the one. And then Keith and I can claim six degrees of separation between us and him.”

  Tierney felt happy as she listened to her husband and friend joke with each other. She missed Tracy, but she liked how their friendship had grown to include Steven now that Tracy had remarried. In addition to attending the wedding, she and Steven had been dinner guests at the Norwood home several times, both before they took up occupancy here at the mansion and during their weekend visits to Lake County. One thing Tierney could say about her husband—he could hold his own with people from all walks of life, and Keith Norwood, despite his wealth, was completely grounded and real.

  After they finished with lunch, Tracy gave Steven directions to the Lincoln Museum. The housekeeper began the cleanup process, and Tierney, Tracy, and their daughters settled in the living room. Sienna and Kylie sat on the floor, busying themselves by rolling a large plastic ball back and forth between them. The air was punctuated by Kylie’s attempts to communicate, which came out in the form of happy squeals and giggles and an occasional decipherable word, her favorite being the one she called everyone, “Ma!”

  “Tierney, I can’t tell you how happy I am about Steven selling his script,” Tracy said.

  “It’s taken a huge load off my shoulders, that’s for sure. I feel almost guilty. I mean, not just a script, but a series creator fee and screen credit as well. I never thought in a million years this would happen.” She chewed on her lower lip before adding, “I guess that doesn’t make me a very good wife. It’s like admitting I didn’t have any confidence in my husband.”

  “It doesn’t mean that at all. You were just working and scrimping pennies for so long, that you started to give up and get discouraged. It’s a human reaction, Tierney. Don’t beat yourself up for it. Heaven knows I was feeling hopeless myself before I met Keith. My life had become an endless cycle of working, college classes, scrimping to get the bills paid, and panicking when there wasn’t enough money to cover everything. One time Gabe actually had to wear a sock on his hand when he lost his gloves before payday.”

  Tierney took a moment to look at the children playing. Sienna seemed to be having so much fun, even with the much-younger Kylie. Once again guilt stabbed at her. “Six of one, a half dozen of the other. Steven probably sold stories more often than Clint got acting jobs, but I’m sure Clint’s acting jobs paid a lot more than Steven’s stories.” Brightening, she added, “But who would have thought you would one day marry the governor?”

  “Well, he hadn’t been elected yet when I married him,” Tracy pointed out, “but yes, I’ve really been fortunate. I thought romance was only something you found in books and movies. And I felt I was just resigned to a life of hard work, with nothing to show for it except gray hair and wrinkles. To tell you the truth, Tierney, I didn’t think Clint’s acting career was ever going to go anywhere, either.” Tracy’s first husband, Clint Pegram, had left her when their son Gabe was an infant, saying that if he didn’t pursue his dreams of becoming an actor before he got too old, opportunity would pass him by. For years he slept on friend’s sofas in New York, working whatever night jobs he could find while auditioning during the day. Eventually he got jobs here and there: TV commercials, narrations, the occasional small part in a TV show or movie. He sent Tracy money whenever he could, but he was rarely flush, and for the most part she had to pay her own way, as well as that of their kids. But two years ago Clint had scored, with a regular supporting part on a TV show and a few parts in movies. His melodious speaking voice also kept him in demand doing narration and recording audiobooks as well.

  It occurred to Tierney that she and Tracy had both been married to men who put their dreams ahead of their families…but at least Clint Pegram hadn’t expected Tracy to support him while he pursued his.

  “That’s okay, Tracy,” she said. “After all, you and Clint were divorced. You weren’t required to believe in him anymore.”

  The two of them laughed, and then Tracy sighed. “Oh, Tierney. As happy as I am for you, I have to wonder if I’m ever going to get to see you after you go out to California.”

  Tierney felt her spirits dampen, as if someone had lowered her face into a bucket of water. She tried to force it away. “No need to feel that way, hon. We’ll be back for visits.”

  She considered confiding her ambivalence about moving to Tracy, but decided against it. She was still trying to work through her own feelings. She supposed she needed to do that before sharing her thoughts with anyone else. But in spite of the rosy future that awaited her in the land of milk and honey, the sense of dread had grown as wide as the Mississippi River.

  She really didn’t want to go to California with Steven.

  Tracy seemed to pick up on her apprehension. “I guess it’s a scary prospect to leave your friends and go two thirds of the way across the country. I know I was pretty nervous about moving down here, and it’s only a four-hour drive from Gurnee. Fortunately, we’re able to get home often, and Amber and Josh visit us as well. The important thing is that I’m going to school.” Tracy, who had dropped out of college when she became pregnant with Amber and married her first husband, was determined to earn her degree. “I can’t say this is where I would choose to live, but it’s important to Keith’s career. He plans on running for a second term, so it looks like I’m going to be living here for another six years or so before we can go back home to Gurnee.” She shrugged. “Sometimes you just have to go along with your husband’s goals.”

  “Well, I don’t want to come across as unsupportive of Steven, and I know there’s nothing particularly exciting about being an administrative assistant, but I like what I do, Tracy. I’m good at it, and I don’t know if I’m ready to give it up to be…a housewife. I mean, maybe the reality will be different but from what I hear, there are no jobs in California. What would I do all day, sit and look at the palm trees or the Pacific Ocean? Sienna will soon be starting school.” Tierney glanced at her daughter, who was too busy playing to pay her any attention.

  “You can always have another baby,” Tracy replied with a smile. She quickly grew serious at the sight of Tierney’s unsmiling expression. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to make light of your situation.”

  Tierney sighed. “I know you don’t. I just feel so torn.” She realized she was saying more than she’d intended to, but she had a sudden need to voice her thoughts aloud. What Tracy said about wives supporting their husbands’ goals had struck a nerve. Speaking quietly so that only Tracy could hear, she said, “He sure as hell hasn’t shown me any support all this time, and now I’m supposed to pick up and leave my life behind because he’s caught a break? It’s not fair.”

  Tracy gave her a reassuring smile. “Just try to relax, and see how things go. I’m so glad you were able to get out of town for a few days.”

  “We really couldn’t afford to go anywhere before,” Tierney admitted. “It took some finagling of the numbers just to buy an extra tank of gas to get down to my mother’s, and that’s just a two-hour drive.” Her lower lip jutted out in anger. “Of course, if Steven had agreed to baby sit while I was at work, the budget wouldn’t have been quite so tight.”

  After a brief hesitation, as if considering her words, Tracy said, “Tierney, I think you might be being a little too hard on Steven. He considered his writing as much a job as his old nine-to-five. He couldn’t have done that very well if he was babysitting an active preschooler, e
ither. So he didn’t help with the cooking or cleaning…he didn’t do any of that when he was working, did he?” At Tierney’s head shake, Tracy added, “Is it really fair for you to expect him to pitch in just because he was working from home?”

  Tierney sighed. “Maybe you’re right.” She attempted a chuckle. “He did help with the laundry…that was one thing he didn’t do, even before. He said that he would work out plot angles while folding the clothes and linens.”

  “See? The important thing is that you’re here now,” Tracy soothed. I want you to think of this as a mini-vacation. Heaven knows, I can’t think of any two people who need it more. You two have a nice romantic bedroom to stay in. Have some wine with dinner tonight and loosen up a bit. I think the tension that’s built up over the last few years may start to melt away, in the right setting.” She winked.