A Haddington Manifestation

  Chapter 5

  “I think you’re making a great error, Your Lordship.”

  “In what way?”

  Clarence and Haddington were strolling down the long corridor smoking on cigars, Haddington would stoop down now and then to check there was no dust on any of the tables or frames of the paintings.

  “About Cloud and Lee.”

  “I’m certain I can survive a week of their company. They’re a fine pair of fellows.

  “You know why they’re here.” He stated.

  “The same thing that brought young Winterhaiming here, I believe.”

  “They are only interested in your money.”

  “While Winterhaiming is concerned with my welfare, I suppose?”

  “There is a difference, Your Lordship.”

  “What difference is that, Clarence?”

  “Winterhaiming is not a confidence trickster….” Clarence glanced over his shoulder quickly.

  “Is something wrong?”

  “I thought I heard something. No, it must be my imagination.”

  “What makes you think Smokey and Two-Refs are confidence tricksters?”

  “I regard them as a pair of frauds.”

  “Being a solicitor, Clarence, you should know about libel.”

  “I make no bones about it, Your Lordship, I shall repeat it to their faces and I’d welcome them taking me to court.”

  “You’re so dramatic, Clarence.”

  “I can’t help it, Your Lordship, I don’t think you have any idea what’s taking place here.”

  “Of course I do, am I a child?”

  “Your Lordship…..”

  “Clarence,” Haddington put his hand on Clarence’s shoulder, “I know your heart’s in the right place, I regard you as a good friend more than just the family solicitor, I know I can depend on you to speak your mind. But, really, old chap, you’re causing yourself a great deal of unnecessary worry.”

  “Then you’ll order these two Americans to leave at the end of the week?”

  “No, I won’t do that, if after a week they choose to leave I’ll not stop them, but I want them to stay as long as they themselves wish to.”

  “Promise me you’ll not do anything foolish, Your Lordship, at least until I return from the city?”

  “You’ll be going back to London then, you’ll not stay the week yourself?”

  “No, no, I must get back to the city,” Clarence rubbed a sore part of his head, “I need the rest.”

  They came strolling back down the corridor to return to the sitting room, they passed a darkened alcove without noticing a figure slumped unconscious on a seat.

  A few seconds later, Lady Marlebone came out of her swoon to violently fan herself. In an instant she was down the corridor and into the sitting room.

  Cloud was giving a demonstration of boxing with the help of Lee and a very willing Sir Rupert. Clarence and Haddington stood watching while to one side sat Cynthia smiling at the antics.

  Over in one corner sat Winterhaiming on a sofa pouring over one of Haddington’s many stamp albums with his spectacles held to his eyes. Miss Blackie sat on a chair beside him watching the antics across the room with a slightly bored expression.

  Lady Marlebone glided in silently and grabbed Cynthia’s arm as she passed, to drag her to her feet.

  “Never leave Mr Winterhaiming on his own, my dear.”

  “But mother…..”

  “A woman’s place is to bring joy and light into the dismal world of men.” She said softly as she steered her daughter over to Winterhaiming.

  With a quick glance at Lee, Cynthia scooped up Miss Blackie to take her place and nurse the cat on her lap. Miss Blackie purred softly as Cynthia patted her.

  “Stamps are so interesting, don’t you think, Mr Winterhaiming?” She asked.

  “Actually, I find them rather tiresome,” he said absently until he looked up and caught sight of Cynthia smiling at him. “Of course many of them do have a fascinating history.”

  Lady Marlebone was back across the room and in Cynthia’s vacant chair so quietly and quickly no-one had even noticed.

  “Like that, Two-Refs, like that.” Cloud was saying.

  “Go ahead, old chap,” laughed Sir Rupert holding his fists up to protect himself, “go ahead, break through my defences, go ahead, old chap.”

  Lee was about to throw a restrained punch when he glanced over at where he thought Cynthia sat. The smile dropped from his face as he saw her talking to Winterhaiming intently and threw his right harder than he had intended. It came into violent contact with Sir Rupert’s left fist.

  “I say,” said a startled Sir Rupert, “I say, I say.”

  “Take it easy boy, take it easy.” Said Cloud.

  But Lee lunged with his left to come into contact with Sir Rupert’s right fist.

  “He’s trying to kill me, he’s trying to kill me.”

  “He chose a very poor way of going about it.” Said Haddington calmly.

  “Two-Refs, snap out of it, boy.” Ordered Cloud.

  “Oh, sorry, Sir Rupert.” Said Lee absently and reached out to grab his hand to shake it vigorously.

  “What sort of monster have you got here, Cloud.” Wailed Sir Rupert trying to get his hand free, “a monster, why don’t you just tear my hand off and be done with it?”

  “Yes, I’ll just tear your hand off.” Said Lee as if in a trance.

  “Help, help, Cloud, in the name of Heaven, speak to the fellow.”

  Cloud sprang at Lee and wrestled with him to get Sir Rupert’s hand from his grasp.

  “What a charming pair they make.” Said Clarence. Haddington turned to look at what he was talking about and saw Winterhaiming showing Cynthia a stamp in the album, she was leaning over to look intently. “It almost makes me regret I’m no longer young.”

  “Yes.” Said Haddington but he ground his teeth while he wore an expression of distaste on his face.

  “What’s gotten into you, Two-Refs?” Demanded Cloud.

  “The fellow’s demented, Cloud,” Sir Rupert held his hand up to Cloud, “tried to kill me, tried to kill me.”

  “I ain’t heard of anyone being killed by a handshake.” Said Cloud.

  Lee was still in a trance-like state as he looked across the room at Cynthia.

  “I’m very sorry, Sir Rupert.” He said as he reached out to grab the hand for a second time.

  “I look like being the first one you will hear of.” Wailed Sir Rupert as he tugged his hand free.

  Lee walked across the room to stand over Cynthia.

  “I say, old chap, you’re standing in the light.” Said Winterhaiming.

  “I was just going for a walk out in the garden, Miss Marlebone, I’d be very honoured if you’d take my arm.”

  “That’s very kind of you, Mr Lee, but Mr Winterhaiming was telling me about some of these stamps.”

  “It’s a swell night.”

  “Yes, I’m sure it is, but not right now, if you don’t mind.”

  “I won’t keep you long.”

  “When a lady politely tells a gentleman something, a gentleman usually listens.” Said Winterhaiming.

  “Now look here, pardner,” said Lee calmly, “this is between me and the lady, I’d take it as a personal favour if you’d just say nothing.”

  “You’re making a pest of yourself, old chap.”

  “You put that book to one side and come outside and I’ll show you a real pest.”

  “Certainly, if that’s what….” He was about to get to his feet.

  “Please stay where you are, Mr Winterhaiming, Mr Lee will come to his senses shortly and will stop being such a bore.”

  Winterhaiming looked up in silence with the album open on his knees, Lee looked down at him and then across at Cynthia who hadn’t taken her eyes off the album as she stroked Miss Blackie.

  Lee snorted angrily and stomped from the room.

  “Please go on with what you were saying, Mr Winterhaiming.” Miss Bla
ckie looked up suddenly, only she had caught the sound of a crack in Cynthia’s voice. Winterhaiming chatted on merrily.

  “I was wondering what’s come over Two-Refs,” Cloud said to Sir Rupert who was still rubbing his hand, “now I know.”

  “What has come over him, old chap, what is it, what, eh?”

  “Dames.”

  “Dames?”

  “Dames,” he nodded. “Dames.”

  “I can’t make her out.” Said Lee, as he lay fully clothed on the bed, he had his hands under his head as he stared up at the ceiling.

  “God made ‘em like that, Two-Refs.” Said Cloud sitting backwards on a chair his chin resting on its back.

  “One minute she leads me on, the next minute she acts as if I’m something that’s just dropped off a wall.”

  “She changed her mind, they do that you know.”

  “Your wife doesn’t about you.”

  “That’s true,” he said half to himself, “she always hated me.”

  “Do you suppose she knows why I am here?”

  “She could.”

  “Of course she does,” he sat up suddenly, “that character I met in the woods, he told me the whole village knew why I was here.” He got to his feet to walk up and down in agitation.

  “What character?”

  “That’s what she’s up to; she’s after a husband, a rich husband. She’ll keep Winterhaiming and me dangling on a string until she knows which one of us is the winner.”

  “No, Two-Refs, I think you’re wrong about the girl,” Cloud shook his head, “she’s square, I’m sure of it, besides her family’s got plenty of dough.”

  “It doesn’t make sense.”

  “It makes all the sense in the world.”

  “How do you figure that, Smoke?”

  “You’re dealing with a woman, they ain’t logical, they ain’t sensible. She probably can’t make up her mind which of you two strapping handsome fellows she wants. The way I see it, the dough doesn’t mean a thing to her.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Of course I’m sure, ain’t they got some custom in this country where a bride comes with a dowry, her dowry would probably make Clem’s pile look like chicken-feed.”

  “A dowry?”

  “That’s right.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “I ain’t ever been wrong have I?”

  “Yes, but I suppose you’re right on this.”

  “Thanks.”

  There was a knock at the door. “Come in.” Said Lee, and the door opened to admit Gilmore.

  “Pardon me, gentlemen, Mr Clarence would like to speak to you, Mr Cloud.”

  “Okay, where is he?”

  “In the back garden, sir.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Sir.” Gilmore bowed slightly from the waist and left.

  “What do you suppose he wants?” Asked Lee.

  “I’ll soon find out. I’ll see you later.” Cloud went out and closed the door. Lee walked over to the window and opened it, he leaned on the sill to stare up at a cloudless, starry night. There was another knock at the door.

  “Come in.” He heard the door open and close as he continued to watch the sky. “Yes?” When the silence remained unbroken he turned to see Winterhaiming standing there.

  “May I speak to you Lee, as one gentleman to another?”

  “Go right ahead.” Lee leaned against the sill and folded his arms on his chest.

  Cloud made his way down the stairs and strolled out into the garden, Clarence sat in the darkness smoking a cigar.

  “Clarence?” Asked Cloud as he lit a cigarette.

  “I wanted to discuss something with you, Cloud, something in private.”

  “I’m all ears.” He sat down in one of the seats.

  “I want to come straight to the point.”

  “I’d appreciate that, Clarence.”

  “I regard you and your friend Lee as the greatest pair of charlatans I’ve ever met.”

  “And there I was thinking you didn’t like us.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Calling us a pair of champions.”

  “Charlatans, not champions, you can stop this damned ridiculous pretence of not hearing, Cloud, you heard what I said.”

  “Let’s just say I heard, but I don’t see what you mean by it.”

  “The meaning is crystal clear.”

  “Not in this darkness, it ain’t.”

  “Perhaps we can come to an agreement, Cloud.”

  “Agreement, on what, Clarence?”

  “A mutual agreement on certain arrangements.”

  “You’ve lost me again, Clarence.”

  “I’m returning to London in the morning, I want you and Lee to accompany me and I want you to promise me that neither you nor Lee will ever come here again.”

  “Why should we do that?”

  “If you do, I promise you that I’ll not go to the authorities, I’ll allow you both to leave the country and not a word will be said to stop you.”

  “I must not be very bright, Clarence, because I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “We have very severe laws here with regard to fraud.”

  “We got them back home, too.”

  “Lee is not Lord Haddington’s grandson, I know it, you know it and Lee knows it.”

  “What makes you think he’s not?”

  “Because young Winterhaiming is his Lordship’s grandson.”

  “You got an opinion, Clarence, and you got a right to it, my opinion is that Two-Refs is Clem’s grandson.”

  “I’m not going to discuss this with you, Cloud,” he got to his feet and with one hand in his pocket slowly walked toward the trees. “I have studied your proof and I have studied Winterhaiming’s proof, I can tell you I have no doubt as to which is conclusive.”

  “Yeah,” Cloud got to his feet and walked over to join him as he continued on toward the trees, “I studied Two-Refs proof and I studied Winterhaiming’s proof and I ain’t got no doubt either.”

  “Do you realise, Cloud, if you’re taken to court and lose you’ll both end up in prison?”

  “I ain’t ever run away from a fight in my life.”

  “You’re speaking for yourself, what about Lee? How do you think he’d feel?”

  “Two-Refs Lee is the straightest man I’ve ever come across.”

  “Straight men do not conspire to commit fraud.”

  Lee was growing steadily angry, he began to clench and unclench his fists.

  “I hope you’ll conduct yourself in a gentlemanly manner, Lee, and that you’ll take my advice in the spirit in which it’s given.”

  “I suggest, friend, that you turn around and go out that door right now and I’ll forget everything you’ve just said.”

  “I knew that you would not be able to stop yourself acting the cad that you are.”

  “You’re pushing me too far, friend, I might not be able to restrain myself from pushing that gentlemanly face of yours into all kinds of ungentlemanly shapes.”

  “I sought only to give you some kindly advice to spare you a degree of unpleasantness.”

  “I intend to see Miss Marlebone whenever and wherever I want to.”

  “She’d prefer that you keep a respectful distance at all times, she finds your presence and your attentions most distressing.”

  “I’ll believe that when I hear it from her.”

  “I certainly won’t be called a liar by some uncouth fool.” Winterhaiming was angry, a bored anger, but angry just the same. “Prepare to defend yourself, sir.” He took up a stance and was about to come forward when he slipped on a rug, he fell into Lee’s arms and they both fell backwards, Lee bumped his head on the wall.

  Winterhaiming was up in an instant with his fists raised and began to circle the room as Lee got to his feet shaking his head. Lee closed in quickly as Winterhaiming threw a punch, but he got his right arm caught in the corner of the bed-stead, it forced him to sp
in and his left slammed into Lee’s chest.

  Lee was thrown back across the room to slam up against a chest of drawers. Winterhaiming was circling again with his fists raised.

  “So you’re gonna cheat.” Said Lee, he picked up a small statue from the chest of drawers and threw it, Winterhaiming ducked and it went flying out the window.

  “I have no need to cheat, old boy, now I shall have to give you a good thrashing.”

  “You go to the city, Clarence, and you get the police.” Cloud was puffing calmly on his cigarette as he and Clarence walked to a tree and then continued to go around it, “Two-Refs and I ain’t got nothing to hide, I see Two-Refs as Clem’s……where’s he gone?”

  Cloud looked about him for the solicitor, he did a complete turn around but saw no sign of him. “He’s losing an argument, so he takes off.” Said Cloud to himself, he continued on around the tree to face the house. Suddenly there was a crash and he looked up to the open window above at Lee’s room.

  He dropped his cigarette and ran back to the house, he didn’t see Clarence lying on the grass on the opposite side of the tree, a small statue at his side.

  Cloud took two steps at a time as he bounded up the stairs, Lee’s door was open with Gilmore standing looking in. Cloud brushed past him to see Cynthia bending over a figure lying on the floor.

  It was Lee, Winterhaiming stood in a fighting stance near the open window.

  “What’d you do, hit him while his back was turned?” Said Cloud to Winterhaiming angrily, as he leant down beside Cynthia.

  “No such thing, old boy.”

  “Don’t give me that, my boy here could take you to pieces with one hand tied behind his back.”

  “The only thing your boy took to pieces, Cloud, was this room, the cost of which I’m certain Lord Haddington will be demanding, and I can assure you, my dear fellow, your boy did not have one hand tied behind his back.”

  “You’d better get out of here,” said Cloud slapping Lee’s face, “when he comes to, he’ll be out for blood.”

  “Get the fellow to his feet, I am well able to defend myself.”

  “Will he be alright, Mr Cloud?” Asked Cynthia fanning Lee with her fan.

  “He’s just knocked out, miss. You better leave and take Hercules there with you.”

  “I don’t like to leave him.”

  “Don’t worry, miss, Gilmore and I can fix him. I hate to think what he’ll do to Winterhaiming.”

  “Come along, Mr Winterhaiming, I think you’ve done enough for one night.” Said Cynthia.

  “Certainly, my dear,” he came over to take her arm, “you will tell the fellow when he awakes,” he said to Cloud, “that should he ever desire a rematch, I believe you people call it, I am at his service.”

  “Sure, sure, now beat it. Take his shoulder, Gilmore.”

  “Certainly, sir.”

  “Physical violence is so tiresome.”

  Cloud looked up with his lips twisted into a snarl that softened as he caught sight of Cynthia glancing back at Lee with a concerned expression before they disappeared from sight.

  They passed Haddington who looked back at Winterhaiming with distaste. He stood at the doorway as Lee was helped to his feet, still very groggy and rubbing his chin.

  “What’s this?” He asked.

  “It’s alright, Clem, just a little mishap.”

  “What was the nature of this little mishap?”

  “A case of fisticuffs, Your Lordship.” Said Gilmore.

  “Fisticuffs?” He glanced back over his shoulder, “you don’t mean…….dear me, that Miss Marlebone must be more capable than I thought.” He smiled.

  “I wish it was, Clem.”

  “No,” Haddington was very disappointed as he looked at Lee, “no, Mr Cloud, you’re not going to tell me, that pipsqueak Winterhaiming did this?”

  “He cheated, he must have crept up on my boy and hit him from behind.”

  “In the front of the face, sir?” Asked Gilmore.

  “Hold your tongue.” Snapped Haddington.

  “Yes, Your Lordship.”

  “Tell me it wasn’t Winterhaiming.” Pleaded the old man.

  “He must have cheated…..”

  “No, he didn’t cheat,” said Lee massaging his chin, “he beat me fair and square.”

  “I am most disappointed.” Said Haddington falling into a chair with a mask of misery.

  “I wish that was all I felt.” Said Lee still rubbing his numb chin.

  “Just a lucky punch, Two-Refs, next time…..” Began Cloud.

  “I hope there is no next time.”

  “Surely, you’re not giving up?” Asked Haddington.

  “He only beat me in a fight, there’s nothing wrong in admitting he’s a better fighter.”

  “The man’s a fool.” Said Haddington, it was unclear who he was referring to. “He went marching out of here with Miss Marlebone, you’re not going to tell me you’ll let him get away with that?”

  “She seems to prefer his company.”

  “That’s impossible, no-one in their right mind would prefer his company.” Said Haddington.

  “With his damn tiresome tiresomes.” Said Cloud who had finally realised Winterhaiming’s name was not ‘tiresome’ just his attitude.

  “Exactly.” Agreed Haddington.

  “She said she didn’t want to see me again.”

  “Two-Refs,” said Cloud, “women say things when they mean the opposite, all the wise men of history will tell you that.”

  “Who told you she didn’t want to see you again?”

  “Winterhaiming.”

  “And you believed him?”

  “I don’t think he’d lie.”

  “You’re very young, my boy, incredibly young.” Haddington was shaking his head.

  “If you two have got some idea of matchmaking, let me tell you right now, mind your own business. She’s old enough to make up her own mind and so am I.”

  “I’m very disappointed in you, Two-Refs,” Haddington got to his feet and walked to the door, “very disappointed.”

  “I can’t help that.”

  As Haddington left he signalled to Gilmore who bowed and followed him.

  “You know what to bring to my room.”

  “Yes, Your Lordship.”

  “A better fighter,” mumbled Haddington angrily to himself as he went down the corridor.

  “She was here, you know.” Said Cloud.

  “Who was here?” Lee sat on the bed to lean against the pillows.

  “Cynthia.” Lee looked at him as if he didn’t believe him. “She was very worried about you.”

  “So she left with Winterhaiming?”

  “She took him out to protect him, I said you’d be after blood.”

  “If I were, he’s got nothing to worry about,” Lee touched his tender chin carefully, “what a wallop he packed, Smoke, it was like the side of a house falling on me.”

  “Just a lucky punch, boy.”

  “It was no lucky punch.”

  “Did you think over what we discussed last night?” Clarence stood in the early morning sunshine beside Cloud as they watched Lee running down the road.

  “I gave it a lot of thought, Clarence.”

  “And?”

  Cloud looked at him in silence for a long second.

  “Have a nice trip, Clarence.”

  “If you want it that way, Cloud, I did give you a chance.” Clarence went around to the front of the house just as the servants were placing his bags in the carriage. He said goodbye to Haddington, climbed in and the carriage moved off.

  He sat back in the corner of the carriage as it clattered over the cobblestones, it reached the long road into the village and passed Lee as he ran along, he waved to Clarence who just nodded.

  It soon reached the village and passed through and drew up at the railway station, the footmen took out his bags and one stood waiting with the door open. He hesitated, then went to the step and stood as if deep in though
t.

  “I’ve changed my mind, bring back the bags.”

  “Yes, sir.”

  He sat back in the corner in gloomy silence while the bags were replaced in the carriage.

  “Rogers.”

  “Yes, Mr Clarence?”

  “Take me to the post office.”

  “Yes, sir.”

  He was soon back at the house to be greeted by Gilmore.

  “So nice to have you back, sir.” He said with a blank face.

  “Thank you, Gilmore. Where is his Lordship?”

  “At breakfast, sir, with his guests.”

  “All of them?”

  “Yes, sir.”

  “Take care of the bags, will you?”

  “Certainly, sir, shall I inform his Lordship of your return?”

  “No.” He moved down the corridor briskly, “I’ll do that myself later.”

  “Very well, sir.” Gilmore disappeared out the front door to take care of the bags and have a quick discussion with Rogers.

  Clarence had almost reached the end of the corridor when Sir Rupert came strolling from a side room down the other end. He caught sight of a fuzzy shape in the distance that he took to be a servant.

  “I say,” he said as he came walking down toward Clarence, his head was bowed as he searched his pockets.

  “Oh, good Lord.” Sighed Clarence as he steeled himself for a bout of repetition, but he saw that Sir Rupert still had his head bowed as he approached. Clarence quickly stepped backwards and went behind a curtain drawn behind a suit of armour.

  “I say, now where did I put those confounded glasses,” he drew level with the suit of armour. “Blast the things. I say,” he said to the armour, “are you the fellow whose task it is to clean the boots of guests? Well, speak up, sir, I can’t hear you. You do have a tongue? I’m certain you have a tongue, the good God gave everyone a tongue. Do you realise, sir, the misery that would be visited upon the world if everyone refused to use the gifts given to them by God?”

  Clarence groaned.

  “What was that? Must be a damned foreigner, what is my brother coming to, bringing a damn foreigner into his house?” Sir Rupert said half to himself. “You don’t speak English, is that what you’re trying to say? You don’t speak English, is that it? No need to be ashamed, many people don’t speak English, it’s not your fault you foreigners are so backward.” Sir Rupert was shouting into the side of the suit of armour’s head, believing the louder he spoke the more he would be understood.

  “Rupert, who on earth are you talking to?” Haddington came strolling down the corridor with his hands in his pockets and a cigar in his mouth.

  “Clemmie, I must say you do employ the most unusual type of people as servants, I really think this is carrying eccentricity too far.”

  “That’s not a servant you’re shouting at, Rupert, it’s a suit of armour.”

  “Don’t be ridiculous, he just spoke to me.”

  “This suit of armour spoke to you?” Haddington walked up to him.

  “This……this coloured foreigner here.”

  “Coloured foreigner?” Snorted Haddington.

  “Do stop it, Clemmie, there are times when I find that perverted sense of humour of yours most……most……..”

  “Tiresome?”

  “Exactly so, now tell this man of yours to answer my questions.”

  “I can do that easily enough, old man, but if he were to answer your questions it wouldn’t be as a result of perverted humour, it would be a damned miracle.”

  Clarence thought deeply for a second with a faint smile on his lips, but finally shook his head.

  “Now, stop it, Clemmie, you know I detest these childish practical jokes of yours, it really is going too far to drag your servants into it.”

  “It is not a servant, it’s a suit of armour.”

  “I see, a suit of armour that talks?”

  “Feel it for yourself.” He grabbed Sir Rupert’s arm and put his hand onto the armour’s shoulder.

  “Good God, the fellow is dead.”

  “Listen,” Haddington grabbed the other shoulder to give it a shake, “can you hear the rattle of tin?”

  “Why, yes I can.”

  “Good.” Haddington went on up the corridor followed by a frowning Sir Rupert. The suit of armour was holding a small axe, the rough treatment had shaken it loose, now it fell backwards and down, the side of the blade came into contact with the curtain that gave a curious grunt.

  “Did you hear something, Clemmie? I heard something, did you? Did you hear something?”

  “Just the suit of armour saying ‘good morning.’”

  “Did it really?” He glanced back over his shoulder.

  “Come along, Rupert, you need a drink.”

  “Was it in a foreign language, Clemmie? If it’s a foreign suit of armour it would say good morning in a foreign language, wouldn’t you agree, old boy? It would speak in a foreign tongue.”

  “We both need a drink.” Said Haddington as he put a hand to his forehead.

  “Yes.” Sneered the voice, the face was grim, stern and very disapproving. “You look the type.”

  “Yes, Your Honour.” Smiled Dickie.

  “Typical low-type, convinced of the superiority of physical altercations in place of worshipful and peaceful contemplation.”

  “Thank you, Your Honour, I was….”

  “Be quiet, sir!” Snapped the magistrate.

  “I am quiet, sir. I’m quiet.”

  “Can you be silent, sir, is it possible for you to hold your tongue for one moment?”

  “Oh, yes, Your Honour, I can be silent, as you see I am being very silent…..”

  “Or will you resort to your brutish nature by using your fists on me to get yourself out of your difficult position?”

  “My fists?” Dickie held up his fists to look at them.

  “Put those down this instant!” Dickie did so. “How dare you threaten a servant of the law, constable, I want you to watch this villain diligently, and if he dares to even attempt to raise his hand you are to forcibly restrain him.”

  Dickie glanced at the constable and put both his hands in his pockets.

  “Are you deliberately being insolent?”

  “Oh, no, Your Honour, oh, no, no.” Dickie shook his head.

  “Take your hands out of your pockets.”

  Dickie did so and put them behind his back.

  “Yes, Your Honour, yes.” He nodded.

  “I’m sure you’ll agree, sir, that this is a most foolish question, but are you aware that yesterday was the Sabbath?” Sneered the magistrate coldly.

  Dickie thought that over in silence for a few seconds, then scratched the back of his head.

  “I’m sorry,” said the magistrate, “perhaps the question was a difficult one.”

  “It’s not so much difficult, Your Honour, it’s whether Your Honour wants me to answer the first question first or the second question first, or whether I should answer the first question second or the second question second?”

  “Constable, do you know what the fellow is talking about?”

  “No, sir.”

  “Recorder, read the reply again will you?” The recorder complied, “it still doesn’t make sense.”

  “No, no, it’s not difficult, Your Honour,” said Dickie as he leaned forward on the dock, “you see, you asked me two questions and I wasn’t sure which one you wanted me to answer.”

  “I asked you two questions?”

  “Yes, Your Honour, you wanted to know if it was a foolish question to ask, that’s the first question, and you asked if I was aware yesterday was the Sabbath.”

  “Yes, that’s right, I did, didn’t I? That was most foolish of me, wasn’t it?” He said coldly.

  “Ah, now, you see, you’ve asked me two more questions. I know how legal questions can be complicated, I want my answers to be absolutely clear.”

  “Hmmm.” The magistrate nodded. “Hmmm.”

  “Wha
tever he charges you with, mate,” whispered the constable, “I’d plead guilty if I were you.”

  “Perhaps, sir, if I were to solve this dilemma by putting it in terms that even those possessing the most primitive of mental apparatus can understand?”

  “It might be a better idea to keep it simple, Your Honour, we don’t want to confuse the recorder, do we?”

  “Can you tell me what day yesterday was, sir?” The magistrate smiled icily, even the constable cringed.

  “Certainly, Your Honour, it was the fifteenth.”

  The smile stayed frozen on the magistrate’s face, he looked at Dickie and then leaned forward to write on a sheet of paper, he said out loud as he wrote: “The accused persists in acts of blatant and obvious insolence in a transparent attempt to appear stupid.” Then he looked up and with glaring eyes and twisted lips prepared himself for further interrogation.

  “Looks like you’re for the high jump, mate.” Whispered the constable.

  “Pardon?” Asked Dickie over his shoulder.

  “Silence there!” Snapped the magistrate. “I do not want yesterday’s date, sir, I want to know what day it was.”

  “It was the Sabbath, Your Honour, the Sabbath.”

  “You are capable of telling one day from the next then?”

  “Today being Monday, Your Honour, yesterday would have been the Sabbath.” The magistrate sat in stony silence for some time watching Dickie grimly. “At least I think yesterday was the Sabbath.” He said suddenly as he scratched the back of his head.

  “I can put your mind at rest there, sir, yesterday was indeed the Sabbath.”

  “There you are, I told you.” He said to the constable with a pleased grin.

  “You are also aware that this is a Christian community of which upholding the sacredness of the Sabbath is one of its most important, indeed one of its most cherished ideals.”

  “Ah, well, there you are, Your Honour, you’re asking me two questions again……”

  “Be quiet, sir!” The magistrate shouted as he brought his gavel down with a resounding whack. Everyone in court jumped. “There is a spirit of rebellion abroad in this land, a spirit of aggressive destruction, of man against man, of brother against brother. I place the responsibility for this spirit on simple-minded louts all too eager to use their fists and not their brains.”

  “Absolutely, Your Honour.” Dickie thumped the rail of the dock with his fist.

  “Kindly tell me, if you would, sir, what do you mean by absolutely?”

  “What you said, Your Honour, about…..about……”

  “About simple-minded louts?”

  “Absolutely, Your Honour.”

  “I was, sir, referring to you.”

  “I ain’t no lout, Your Honour, that can’t be blamed on me.”

  “Then why were you fighting?”

  “Was I?”

  “The constable arrested you yesterday during a fight you apparently started.”

  “Did I?”

  “I’ll ask the questions, sir.”

  “Did the cart tell you I started it?” Dickie asked the constable. ‘What am I saying?’ He said to himself.

  “Cart, sir, what is this nonsense about a cart?”

  “The cart attacked me, Your Honour, I was sitting in the sun minding me own business and this Lord Clumsy sets a cart on me and pushes a wall on me.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “It’s God’s truth, Your Honour, I am innocent.” Dickie held up his hand.

  “Constable, there’s nothing here about any cart, was the fellow fighting with a cart at well?”

  “Stupid old….” Muttered the constable as he stood to attention. “I did state at the beginning, Your Honour, that the accused was intoxicated and in such state he did wreck a cart and a wall.”

  “Why did you say he was fighting?”

  “I didn’t say he was fighting, Your Honour.”

  “Oh, no, Your Honour, I wasn’t fighting……”

  “Silence! Constable, did you or did you not tell this court, this fellow was apprehended while engaged in a vicious fighting contest?”

  “I did not.”

  “Are you calling me a liar, constable?”

  “No, Your Honour, just mistaken.”

  “I wasn’t fighting…….”

  “You will remain silent, sir, or I shall have you gagged.” He turned to the recorder. “Has the constable become senile?”

  “Oh, no, Your Honour.” Said the recorder as he stood up to have a whispered conversation with the magistrate.

  “Stupid old…..” The constable looked up at the ceiling.

  “Why didn’t you tell me I had the wrong papers?” The magistrate whispered loudly to the recorder, “why in God’s name did you allow me to go on as long as I did?” He glared angrily at the recorder and picked up his gavel threateningly, the recorder sat down quickly.

  “You gave evidence, did you constable?”

  “I did, Your Honour.”

  “In my presence?”

  “I believe you were present, Your Honour.”

  “What was I doing?”

  “Reading the Bible, I believe, Your Honour.”

  “Yes, that was me, I must have missed everything you said.”

  “Probably, Your Honour.”

  “Pardon?”

  “It would appear so, Your Honour.”

  “Just to refresh my memory, constable, what was the charge against this fellow?”

  “Drunk and disorderly, being a public nuisance and malicious destruction of private property, Your Honour.”

  “No fighting?”

  “No, Your Honour.”

  “Are you certain, constable?”

  “I’m certain, Your Honour.”

  “Hmm, pity.” He glared at Dickie.

  “Stupid old…..”

  “Thank you, constable, that will be all.”

  “Drunk and disorderly, were we?”

  “We were, Your Honour.”

  “Tell me, accused, do you know what day it was yesterday?”

  “It was…the…fif….”

  “Yes?”

  “The Sabbath, Your Honour.”

  “We’ve already established this is a Christian community, haven’t we?”

  “Yes, Your Honour, we did all that.”

  “And you desecrated the Sabbath by drinking, didn’t you, drinking to excess?”

  “Well, yes and no, Your Honour.”

  “The court would be most grateful, accused, if you would clarify that answer.”

  “Would they?” Dickie leaned down to speak to the handful of people below him.“Well, you see……”

  “Accused…..”

  “There are those…..”

  “Accused!” The gavel came down with a whack. “You will address your replies to me.”

  “Sorry, Your Honour.”

  “Now, if you would kindly explain what you meant by yes and no.”

  “Well, Your Honour, I did drink to excess, I was overcome by the misery of the world, the terrible suffering of my fellow man….”

  “Accused, unless you come to the point quickly I shall add a further victim to that misery.”

  “The point is, Your Honour, I did not desecrate the Sabbath.”

  “You drank to excess?”

  “I fell temporarily by the wayside.”

  “Isn’t that desecrating the Sabbath?”

  “Ah, now here’s where we get into a spot of muck, Your Honour….. I mean spot of bother.”

  “Pray tell, accused, in what way do we get into a spot of bother?”

  “You see, I can’t desecrate something that ain’t there, can I?”

  The magistrate leaned forward with a frown. “That reasoning completely escapes me.”

  “It’s the most simple thing in the world, Your Honour, I didn’t desecrate the Sabbath.”

  “I see, I see,” the magistrate nodded, “it was your twin brother, was it?”

  ??
?Oh, no, Your Honour, it was me alright, only I was drinking too much, but not desecrating the Sabbath.”

  “You mean you were suffering an excess of drink that you’d taken the day before? I’m sorry, accused, I’ve heard all these excuses before…..”

  “No, no Your Honour, you see, to you, yesterday was the Sabbath, but it wasn’t the Sabbath to me.”

  “Constable, examine the accused to see if he’s intoxicated.”

  “You’re not listening, you stupid….” Mumbled Dickie.

  “What did you say, accused?”

  “Your Honour, the Sabbath is a sacred day?”

  “It is.”

  “Yesterday, being Sunday was the Sabbath?”

  “Yes.”

  “Ah, now, you see, to you it’s the Sabbath, but it’s different with me.”

  “Are you saying, accused, that you’ve invented your own week?”

  “No, Your Honour, I just don’t hold yesterday to be the Sabbath.”

  “What?”

  “Christians like your good self do, but I don’t.”

  “Pray God he doesn’t say he’s an atheist.” Sighed a very worried recorder.

  “I’m not a Christian, Your Honour.”

  The magistrate’s eyes glassed over, his teeth were slowly bared as he picked up his Bible. “If you are not a Christian, accused, there is nothing else.”

  “I’m a Buddhist.”

  “A Buddhist?”

  Dickie joined his hands together and brought the tips of his fingers up under his nose and bowed to the magistrate as he mumbled some mumbo-jumbo.

  “I have a nephew who is a Buddhist.” Smiled the recorder.

  “Oh?” Asked a nervous Dickie.

  “I thought Buddhist’s renounce all alcohol?”

  “Not all Buddhists.”

  “Accused….”

  “My nephew did.”

  “Recorder……”

  “Ah, well, you see, it’s the sect, he probably belongs to the South Punjab sect, I belong to the Northern Punjab.”

  “Accused……”

  “Oh, I see, I thought they were all the same.”

  “Recorder…..”

  “No, no, we’ve all got different ways of paying homage to our maker, some believe in eating mud or snakes, you see?”

  “That sounds nasty.”

  “That’s why we dropped out.”

  “Accused…..”

  “Look, mate,” said Dickie to the magistrate, “I’ll get to you in a minute.”

  “Mate…..?”

  “What day do you regard as the Sabbath?” Asked the recorder.

  “Ah, well……” Dickie thought that over quickly. “Wednesday, yes, Wednesday is our Sabbath.”

  “It’s your big day Wednesday then?”

  Whack! The room fell silent.

  “I am so sorry to interrupt you gentlemen.” Said the magistrate.

  “That’s alright……” Began the recorder.

  “Sit down and remain silent!” The recorder did so. “Now, accused. So you’re a Buddhist, are you?”

  “Yes, Your Honour.”

  “A northern Punjab Buddhist?”

  “Yes, Your Honour.”

  “And you hold Wednesday to be the Sabbath, do you?”

  “Yes, Your Honour.” He repeated the business of joining his hands holding them to his face to bow and mumble.

  “And what is that supposed to mean?”

  “It’s a Buddhist blessing, Your Honour.”

  “A Buddhist blessing, is it?”

  “Yes, Your Honour.” He did it again.

  “Another blessing, accused?”

  “You’ve been twice blessed, Your Honour you might say.”

  “I certainly don’t want my court to be accused of being religiously intolerant, so I’ll let you off lightly this time.”

  “Thank you, Your Honour,” Dickie did his blessing act and turned to leave.

  “Just one moment, sir. This court fines you ten shillings for wilful damage to private property.”

  “Ten bleeding shillings, is that what you call light?”

  “You’re not satisfied with the amount.”

  “Quite frankly, Your Honour, no, I’m not.”

  “Well, I’ll amend it just this once.”

  “How very kind of you.” He was doing his blessing act again.

  “We’ll make it one pound.”

  “One pound…….!”

  “Of course if that amount is not to your liking…….”

  “Oh, no, Your Honour, that is a most fair amount, the court has been very generous to me.”

  “Good day, sir.” Smiled the magistrate.

  “Good day, Your Honour.” He did the blessing act.

  “A Buddhist.” George shook his head as he walked down the road with Dickie and Charlie. “You wouldn’t know a Buddhist if you tripped over one.”

  “They wear beards and mumble a lot of prayers.”

  “What made you say you were a bleeding Buddhist?” Asked Charlie.

  “What could I say, that magistrate hated me.”

  “Not as much as we do. Do you realise you’ve just cost us one pound, we haven’t even started on the wall yet and we’re behind schedule, all because of you.”

  “It’s that Lord Clumsy bloke.”

  “He was no-where near you.”

  “Oh, yes, he was, he hates me, he went looking for me and set that cart on me.”

  “And forced beer down your throat?”

  “He must’ve done that while I was asleep.” Said Dickie seriously, he didn’t notice a rock and tripped over it.

  “I suppose Lord Clumsy put that there?”

  “He put it there so I’d trip on it, he hates me.” Said a miserable Dickie lying on the ground.

  “If he does he’s joined a growing list.” Said George as he and his brother strolled on to leave Dickie lying in the dust.

  They spent most of the day arguing and planning over how the wall should be built, while George’s wife looked on with a knowing look.

  “No wall, no food.” She said sternly with her hands on her hips.’

  “Hold your bleeding tongue, woman.”

  “I intend to, over my dinner.”

  “George,” whined Dickie, “I’ll die without food.”

  “You’ve only just had a small feed that you had the nerve to call a snack.”Said Charlie.

  “My death will be on your consciences, and yours, missus.”

  “I’ve never had a thing on my conscience in my life….” Said Grace.

  ‘I can well believe that.’ Thought Dickie.

  “And one less useless lump like you on earth won’t give me any bother.”

  “See, George, she hates me.”

  “I’m telling you, George, no wall, no dinner.”

  “Alright, woman, stop repeating yourself.”

  “That’s the last time I’ll say it.” She went into the house.

  “I’ll starve.” Pouted Dickie.

  “I doubt that, lad.” George winked at Charlie, “the local pub has the best dinner in the area and they have beer as well.” George wore a broad grin as he turned to face Dickie. “But I suppose it’s too far for you to walk….where’s he gone?” Dickie was running down the road in the direction of the pub. “Hey, Dickie, wait for us.”

  “George has got the money.” Called Charlie, and Dickie came to a halt to wait for them.

  Haddington had insisted on taking Lee and Cloud on a tour of the estate so they had set off in an open carriage, Cloud had kept them roaring with laughter most of the way.

  Now, in high spirits and a jovial mood they were on their way back to the house for lunch. Haddington saw Marlowe making his way through the trees and he ordered Rogers to halt.

  They all sat looking at the naturalist as he came over to the carriage.

  “Good afternoon, Marlowe.”

  “Good afternoon, Your Lordship.”

  “Gentlemen,” Haddington said to Lee a
nd Cloud, “our local scientist…..”

  “Amateur naturalist, sir.”

  “Same thing. Mr Marlowe, these two chaps are visitors from America, Mr Cloud and…..”

  “How do you do?” He reached up to shake hands with Cloud. “I’ve met Mr Lee, how do you do, sir?”

  “Have you? I see.” Haddington sat nodding to no-one in particular. “You seemed a bit lost over there, Marlowe.”

  “As a matter of fact, Your Lordship, I’ve mislaid my butterfly net, I can’t think where I’ve put the blasted thing, a present from my wife, you know.”

  “You could always ask Mr Garth’s trees.” Smiled Cloud.

  “I’m sure if they could talk, they would know.”

  “Well, Marlowe, old man,” said Haddington, “we’ll keep our eyes and our ears open and if we come across your net we’ll send it back to you.”

  “We’ll get Mr Garth to have one of his trees deliver it.” Laughed Cloud.

  “Thank you,” smiled Marlowe as he raised his hat, “nice to have met you, gentlemen.”

  “Same here.” Said Cloud.

  “Move on, Rogers. Good afternoon, Marlowe.”

  “Your Lordship.” Marlowe watched them drive away smiling to himself at the sounds of laughter they were making. He took out his pipe and began to fill it. ‘Now there’s a heartening sound.’ He thought to himself.

  They were still laughing merrily as they drove up to the house, as they stepped from the carriage Cloud had them roaring once again, Lee caught sight of Cynthia strolling arm in arm with Winterhaiming and his smile slipped a little but Haddington, who hadn’t noticed slapped him on the shoulder.

  “Well, my boy, what did you think of the estate?” Lee just shook his head as he tried to think of a description.

  “Impressive, Clem,” said Cloud, “very impressive.”

  “My dear Mr Cloud,” laughed Haddington as he took Cloud’s arm and Lee’s arm to lead them into the house, “you’re becoming more English every day.”

  “How’s that?”

  “Understatement, my dear fellow, understatement.” He laughed.

  “Oh, good,” smiled Cynthia, “Lord Haddington is back.”

  “How tiresome.”

 

  After lunch Clarence was sitting out in the garden reading a newspaper. Winterhaiming was walking with Cynthia through the trees a few steps behind Sir Rupert and Lady Marlebone.

  “That Clem is sure some character.” Said Cloud as he and Lee took a seat near Clarence.

  “Yes, yes, he is.” Said Clarence still reading his paper.

  “I was curious, Clarence, as to what made you decide not to go to London this morning.” Said Cloud as he lit a cigarette.

  “If you must know, it was Clem, as you so quaintly call him.”

  “I don’t get that, do you, Two-Refs?” Lee was absently watching the group in the distance and just shook his head.

  “I believe that Clem should be protected from himself. At the present time I am the only person in this household upon whom I feel total confidence in being capable of doing just that.”

  “Protect him from what?”

  “Let us just say certain unscrupulous elements in the area, I certainly don’t wish to appear ungentlemanly by being any blunter that that.”

  “Unscrupulous elements?”

  “Shall we say temporary unscrupulous elements?”

  “Yes, let’s say that. What unscrupulous elements?” Asked Cloud with a frown.

  “Please, Cloud, do not insult my intelligence by pretending to be stupid.”

  “Who’s pretending?” Said Lee as he got to his feet. “Miss Marlebone.” He smiled, Cloud and Clarence also got to their feet as Cynthia walked to an empty seat and sat down to fan herself.

  “It is terribly warm today.”

  “Allow me.” Lee stepped over to the table to pour a glass of iced lemonade and handed it to her. She nodded her thanks and took a sip.

  “I simply had to get away,” she said, “Sir Rupert was telling his life story and he has told it once before.”

  “What, only once?” Smiled Clarence.

  “He does have a weakness for repeating himself, doesn’t he?” Smiled Lee to Cynthia but she looked at him so coldly that the smile faded.

  “A weakness,” laughed Cloud, “I’d call it a helpless failing.” But he too got a cold look for his troubles. “What did I say?” He asked out of the corner of his mouth.

  “I am a little peeved, Mr Clarence.”

  “Are you, Miss Marlebone, about what?”

  “The way His Lordship treats me; he acts as if I were some scatterbrained child lacking all capacity to think for myself.”

  “I’m sure you’re wrong, Miss….” Began Lee with a smile but the look she gave him froze the words on his lips, he looked at Cloud and shrugged his shoulders.

  “I’m sure you’re mistaken, Miss Marlebone.” Said Clarence.

  “He didn’t even have the decency to ask me if I’d like to have gone on his tour this morning.”

  “You’ve seen the estate before, Miss Marllebone.”

  “The point is, he didn’t even ask me.”

  “Perhaps he mentioned it to Lady Marlebone and she made it known you didn’t want to go, after all young Winterhaiming didn’t want to go.”

  “There you are,” she said to Cloud, “isn’t that just what I’ve said?”

  “Well, yes, ma’am it is…..”

  “His Lordship should have asked me,” she said ignoring Cloud and turning to Clarence, “that would have only been common decency.”

  “If His Lordship had asked you, would you have gone?”

  “Certainly not.”

  “Perhaps he knew that and decided to accept Lady Marlebone’s answer?”

  “He should have asked me.”

  “I’ll bring the matter up with His Lordship at the next opportunity.”

  “It’s too late now.” She took another sip of her drink. Lee gallantly got to his feet and walked over to the table.

  “Allow me to refill your glass, miss?”

  “Don’t bother, I don’t want any more.”

  “It’s no bother, miss.”

  “If you don’t mind, Mr Lee,” she said coldly, “I said don’t bother.”

  “It’s no bother, miss.” He was reaching over with the jug as he spoke, not watching what he was doing he knocked over her glass. She got quickly to her feet to brush away the few drops of liquid that landed on her dress and burst into angry words the vehemence of which surprised everyone including herself.

  Lee stepped back with the jug and stood with his mouth half opened with shock.

  “Do watch what you’re doing you stupid man.” She said pointing, Lee looked down to see that he was emptying the jug into Clarence’s lap.

  Clarence sat with a resigned expression on his face.

  “I’m sorry,” he said to Clarence, “I’m sorry,” he said to Cynthia, “I’m sorry.” He repeated lamely.

  “Mr Cloud, your arm if you please.” She demanded.

  “I’d be glad to……” Began Lee.

  “I’d prefer Mr Cloud’s arm.”

  “Certainly.” Smiled Cloud as he came walking over, he dug Lee in the ribs with his elbow and winked, “I’ll put a good word in for you, boy.”

  “Thanks.”

  Cynthia put up her parasol and took Cloud’s arm. “Mr Lee is such a clumsy man, Mr Cloud.” She said after they’d taken a few steps.

  “He ain’t so bad really, miss, once you get to know him.”

  She looked back over her shoulder to see him helping a soggy Clarence to his feet, he put the jug on the edge of the table where it promptly fell off onto Clarence’s foot.

  He was leaning on the window sill chuckling to himself.

  “Sir?” Asked the valet who was brushing some fluff from the back of his coat.

  “Nothing, nothing, Edgar, that will be all.”

  “Yes, sir.” He bowed and left.

 
Haddington continued to watch Miss Blackie in the garden, the butterfly she had been chasing had quickly disappeared. Now with majestic deliberation she was making her way through the grass toward a tree.

  To his surprise one of the branches moved slightly to wave in her face, she stopped and the branch did so again this time a paw shot out but not quickly enough. The branch came down quickly and up again, Miss Blackie sprang in the air after it.

  ‘The tree seems to be playing with her.’ Thought Haddington as he realised there was not a breath of wind, yet the branch was definitely moving, much to the delight of Miss Blackie.

  Haddington watched her for some time until Gilmore appeared to tell him Lady Marlebone was a little in need of a fourth for bridge. He gave one last look out of the window at the cat and then left the room.

  Miss Blackie got her claws into the branch as it swung down and rose up with it, suddenly a net was thrown over her.

  “Got you, you little devil.” Smiled Garth as he gathered the neck of the net trapping her inside. “You’ll not bother my lads again.”

  He did not see the root of the tree sticking out of the ground and fell over, suddenly a branch came from above to land on him.

  “What the blazes…..” He was stunned and relaxed his grip on the net, in a flash Miss Blackie went quickly loping off. “What’s the matter with you, Rupert?” He said as he lay on the ground looking over his shoulder with narrowed, suspicious eyes, “alright, it was an accident, stop blubbering, Rupert…….stop……in the name of God, Rupert, stop whining, I am not going to pull you out by the roots.” It was difficult to believe that such a thought had not crossed the mind behind the narrowed eyes so carefully watching Rupert.

  The lazy, sunny afternoon passed quickly enough into night and to Cloud and Lee’s surprise they found that Haddington had a few people in the district, including the vicar, drop in for a visit.

  Cloud thought it was mighty neighbourly of them, he had no idea that Haddington had a social evening at least once a week, and only by special invitation.

  After supper they broke up into small groups around tables as partners formed up for bridge, which seemed to be a real craze, thought Cloud as Sir Rupert partnered Lady Marlebone while he partnered Lee.

  It was very late when the guests had all left. Haddington sat talking with Cloud and Clarence while they smoked cigars and finished their drinks.

  Cloud and Clarence were in the midst of a furious argument about the merits of English and American boxers.

  “Well, gentlemen,” Haddington got to his feet, “I believe I’ll leave you to your nasty habits and retire.”

  “Goodnight, Your Lordship,” said Clarence as he got to his feet.

  “Goodnight, Clem,” said Cloud still sitting, “how can you compare them,” he said to Clarence as Haddington strolled from the room, “only a fool could say there was any comparison.”

  Haddington strolled out to the back garden with his hands in his pockets, he intended to finish his cigar before going to bed. He stood facing the trees, the night was cool and peaceful, there wasn’t a cloud in the sky, he took a last draw on his cigar and was about to drop it to the ground to extinguish it when something caught his eye. Down near the garden chairs was the quick glow of a cigarette.

  Casually he made his way down to them as he drew nearer he could make out the shape of Lee. He sat in one chair with his feet up on the table.

  “Mind if I join you?”

  “Not at all, Your Lordship.” He didn’t move.

  Haddington sat down in the chair on the other side of the table.

  “It’s a beautiful night, isn’t it?”

  “Yes, it is.”

  “Smokey thinks you’re in bed, you have an early morning before you.”

  “I don’t think one late night will do me much harm.”

  “I quite agree old man.” He dropped his cigar and stamped it out. “Have you got a cigarette?”

  Wordlessly Lee took one out of his pocket and handed it across, Haddington lit it.

  “Give me a good cigar any day.” He said with a grimace after his first draw, he quickly dropped the cigarette and ground it out. Lee continued to sit in silence. “What would you do, Two-Refs, if all this land were suddenly yours?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “It’s worth a great deal of money, you know?”

  “I’m sure it is.”

  “I’ve even heard suggestions about cutting it up and selling it off in sections, how would you feel about that?”

  “You mean if I owned it?”

  “Yes.”

  “I’d fight every attempt to do so.”

  “Do you really believe yourself to be my grandson?”

  “Smokey believes I am, and he’s never lied to me in his life.”

  “But he could be wrong.”

  “He’s one of the most cautious men I know, he’d have to have pretty good evidence to stop half-way through the fight season to drag me half across the world.”

  “He has your interest at heart, doesn’t he, I mean, what does he hope to get out of it?”

  Lee looked at him in silence as he puffed on his cigarette.

  “I’ve got a lot of faith in Smokey Cloud, I’d trust that man with everything I’ve got.”

  “I didn’t mean that to sound so offensive, I just wanted your opinion.”

  “If I were your grandson and I had all this land, Smokey would shake my hand, wish me luck and he’d go back home.”

  “Would you let him?”

  “I’d do everything to stop him, but he’s his own master, he’ll do whatever he wants to.”

  “Well, it’s been nice talking to you, Two-Refs,” Haddington got to his feet, “by the way, what is your name, I can’t keep calling you Two-Refs?”

  “It’s Jerome.”

  Haddington looked at him silently for a long moment. “Don’t stay up too long, Two-Refs.” He began to chuckle. “I don’t mean to be offensive, Two-Refs, but Sir Rupert’s second name is Jerome, quite frankly, I loathe the name.”

  “I prefer Two-Refs myself.”

  “By the way, young Winterhaiming and the Marlebone girl were getting on very well tonight, don’t you think?”

  “Yes, they were, weren’t they?”

  “So you’re determined to make it easy for the fellow, are you?”

  “Goodnight, Your Lordship.”

  “You’re a damned fool, do you know that?”

  “You know, Your Lordship, I may be your grandson or I may not, you may choose to call me your grandson or you may not, but I just might not want to be your grandson.”

  Haddington snorted and walked back to the house. “Goodnight, Two-Refs.” He called.

  “Goodnight, Your Lordship.”

  * * * * *