What the Heart Desires
Heaven approached with caution. The closer she came to the table, the more she recognized the book Layla studied. It was the same book that her mother and Delia showed her, Dylan, and Layne right after they came home—the Tome of Souls.
“Layla?” She waited for her to look away from the book. Confusion and frustration quaked in her Keeper’s mother. “Is something wrong?”
“I, uh, don’t know, Heaven.” She patted the open page. “Do you know what this book is?”
Heaven nodded. She moved closer to the table and slid onto the bench opposite Layla. “It’s about our history. The Psi, I mean. My mom and Delia showed it to us when we returned from Jamaica.”
“What were they showing you?”
It wasn’t hard to miss the curiosity in Layla’s voice. Her energy held the same inquisitiveness. The harder she stared, the more Heaven worried. Would she get her parents and Delia in trouble for having the book in their possession? None of them had taken it, but she couldn’t provide the name of the former Regency agent who had. Delia never said his name, only that he’d given it to her because of Dylan. Had her mother-in-law lied, or worse, had they broken Psi law?
Even if they had, Layla wouldn’t report her friends. She didn’t seem like a snitch and no darkness twisted her soul. Besides, something in Heaven’s gut urged her to talk to Layla. They hadn’t had a chance to speak in private since she’d arrived to heal her son. Now that the time had arrived, she wouldn’t pass the opportunity to learn more about her Keeper’s mother.
“They brought it out when they were telling us our history and about me and Dylan being part of the Supreme Trinity. We didn’t discuss much more. The little bit of information we received was more than I could process.”
Silence formed between them as Layla peered at her. It seemed as if she doubted her words. Before Heaven could work up the nerve to ask, Layla lowered her eyes back to the book.
“Did they mention anything about missing pages?”
“No.”
The book came back into view. A few pages remained between Layla’s fingers. Nothing seemed unusual about them, or the book, until Heaven leaned closer. Then she saw it, the gap in the spine between the first page in Layla’s hand and the one that faced the ceiling.
“What’s wrong, Layla? What information is on the missing pages?”
“Can I ask you something first?”
It was rude to keep her waiting for an answer, but fear kept Heaven’s words frozen in her throat. As far as she knew, Layla had no ability to sense what had happened between her and Layne, unless she counted her motherly intuition.
Incapable of forming words, she finally gave up and nodded. Maybe this was nothing more than a guilty heart inspiring paranoia. If so, the less attention she drew to herself, the better.
“You know that you and Layne share an affinity, but did anyone explain what the bond entails?”
“My mom said it’s the strongest Seeker-Keeper bond to exist, and it’s the rarest.”
“Is that all she told you?” She paused long enough for Heaven to nod. Disappointment wavered inside her. “I had a feeling that was the case the day your mother and I assessed my son. Had you known the truth, you wouldn’t have been so shocked to know you’re the one who healed him.”
The revelation upset Heaven. She shifted against the bench and leaned her arms on the table. “Why didn’t you tell me then?”
“Your mom said you’d just learned about the affinity. I didn’t want to throw more on you.”
“I’m so sick of hearing that excuse. I’m sure my mom will say the same when I confront her on her lies.”
“Sweetie, she didn’t lie. She only told you half the story. Yes, affinity bonds only exist between a Seeker and her Keeper. They are the rarest bonds known to the Psi. In fact, no Psi alive has witnessed one because there hasn’t been one in centuries. And they’re far more consuming than a soulmate bond.”
Heat prickled Heaven’s cheeks. She wasn’t sure where Layla was going with this or what point she was trying to make. Part of her didn’t want to believe any of it. Yet something said Layne’s mom was speaking the truth.
“How can anything be more consuming than a soulmate bond? It’s the deepest level of love.”
“You’re right. For most of us, it is, but an affinity bond is stronger.”
“Why?”
Layla stared at the table as she swallowed hard. “Heaven… Affinity bonds are soulmate bonds—the ultimate soulmate bonds—because the Seeker and Keeper involved are original soulmates.”
Her body rocked as the room spun. She focused on her heart, how the increased rhythm made her ears ring and face heat. “What are you saying, Layla?”
When silence returned her question, she gripped the edge of the bench. Whatever answer Layla had would be more than colossal. It would change everything. There would be no going back, no way to undo what was about to happen, but knowing that didn’t change her mind.
Remorse showed on Layla’s face. It showed in the way she wrinkled her forehead and pressed her lips until they were white. When they finally parted to speak, all other sounds disappeared.
“Layne was supposed to be your soulmate, Heaven.”
The words played on repeat, forming a rhythm that coincided with the fire engulfing her. The reality of what Layla said was impossible. It had to be because Dylan was her… Delia said he was her… Even her mother swore they…
Memories of her time with Layne overtook her. The pain in her heart when she thought he died. The relief that replaced it when he woke. The instinct to heal him, even the inability to resist him finally made sense. If what Layla said was true, it explained a lot of things, and complicated them even more.
“How is this possible? God chooses our mate. He chose Dylan for me.”
“I know what you’ve been told, but it’s half of the story. My son is your first-born soulmate, your Twin Flame.”
“How?” She slapped her hand atop the table. “Delia said it was prophesied that Nate’s son would marry the most powerful Seeker.”
“You also said they didn’t tell you everything about our history. You couldn’t process the parts they did. The pages that were in this book explained affinity bonds, Heaven. Now they’re missing.”
Her fingers tapped the page that faced the ceiling until Heaven regarded the book. The knot in her stomach grew tighter the longer she stared at it and the gap in the spine. “Who would take the pages?”
“I don’t know, nor am I accusing anyone, which is why I asked if they’d mentioned the missing pages.” Layla traced the spine with her finger. “Without them, I can’t give you a full explanation on affinity bonds. My memory isn’t what it used to be, but I can tell you this much.” Her pained eyes met Heaven’s. “Affinity bonds happen when a Psi is stripped of his birthright. It is not by his doing but by those who have gone before him.”
“I’m so confused, Layla. How can Dylan and I be a fortunate pair if Layne is supposed to be my… Your son didn’t even like me when we first met. How could a soul dislike its mate?”
Layla gazed out the window, shoulders slumping when she slouched against the back of the bench. She struggled to find the right words. Heaven sensed that much, but why did everything involving her life have to be so complicated?
“When soulmates meet, they’re instantly drawn to each other. It’s sort of a love-at-first-sight moment. It’s not the same for Twin Flames. When they meet, there is a pull, but there is also resistance. Their souls sense the connection they share, but the curse that tore them apart keeps them conflicted. Their bond takes time to develop, and the longer they resist, the more pain they cause each other.”
Each word passing through Layla’s lips became harder to ignore. God knows Layne had given her plenty of weird looks after they met. The strange vibes she sensed thereafter played a part in convincing her that he didn’t like her. On the contrary, he’d simply been resisting their connection.
Keeping her attention
focused on the window, Layla swept a wisp of blonde hair from her face and tucked it behind her ear. “Maybe this will help convince you that what I’m saying is true. I’m well aware of my son’s bad boy reputation, but why do you think he developed it?”
“I don’t know.”
“Soulmate bonds never fade, even if one is altered, like the one between you and my son. He’s been searching for you just as long as Dylan.”
She tapped her fingers against the table, as if she didn’t want to tell Heaven the rest. But she did.
“The only reason your husband didn’t go through the same is because he shared his empathy with you when you almost died. That connection kept you linked through the years. Layne didn’t have that.”
Her hand stilled, but only for a second. Then she placed it to her chest.
“He had this insistent need in him, this constant void that he tried to fill. He didn’t know what he was searching for so he filled the void with sex, something he thought would satisfy him. But it didn’t. It made him worse.”
Every word uttered twisted Heaven inside and out. She slid across the bench and stood, drawing in breath after breath. Believing what Layla said meant believing her parents and mother-in-law had lied. Again. Whether it was intentional or not, she didn’t know, and she wasn’t sure she wanted to find out.
“I don’t know what any of this means, Layla. Soulmates represent the bond between two people, not three. It’s supposed to be the love between Dylan and I that saves the world.”
A warm hand curled around Heaven’s shoulder. “I can’t give you the answers you seek, Heaven, not without the missing pages. I can’t even say how this affects your bond with Dylan. What I do know is that the second Layne accepted his role as your Keeper, your fates were resealed, which is why you have the fire seal in your palms.”
The faint mark inside her hand came into view as she flipped her palm face up. She traced it with her finger, feeling the heated pulse of Layne’s energy. Could he truly be her—?
Turning on her heel, she came face-to-face with her Keeper’s mother. “How do you know Layne is my Twin Flame?”
Layla observed the floor, but Heaven didn’t miss the way her lips quivered. “Because I’m part of the reason he lost you.”
Pain resonated within her, pain that rocked Heaven when she sensed it. She reached forward, touching Layla’s shoulder in an effort to comfort her, but tear-filled eyes flashed up to hers. “I didn’t do it on purpose. I swear to you. If I had known—”
“What’s going on, Mom? Why are you crying?”
Heaven spun toward the door. The instant Layne came into view, something snapped inside her chest. The pretense that he was nothing more than her Keeper faded. He was far more than that, far more than she ever imagined.
He was her original soulmate, her Twin Flame.
CHAPTER 20
The oak door clicked closed as Layne released the handle and entered the living room of the main house. He gazed at the staircase toward the upper floor, but not because he sensed Heaven’s presence. Memories of what transpired between them played in his mind.
He’d never been more grateful to have a significant amount of space between him and Dylan. The same went for Nicholas. Every second he spent with Heaven’s father, he worried he was reading his thoughts. God knows they’d been consumed with her. How could he think of anything else when her energy quaked with shock and confusion?
Scott and Hope came into view while he surveyed the room. He found them on the couch, heads together, shoulders touching. Something lay between. Upon further inspection, he noticed Adalyn’s chubby cheeks and dark curls.
It wasn’t long before he gained Scott’s attention. His friend glanced up long enough to smile and point toward the back of the house. “She went that way.”
Layne nodded, lowering his eyes to Adalyn once more. Though content with her aunt and uncle, her energy hinted to the apprehension lying beneath her peaceful exterior. The emotion spun toward the back of the house, near the same area he sensed her mother.
While he didn’t know what disturbed her emotional balance, he didn’t waste his time trying to figure it out. Whatever the reason, she was determined to keep it to herself. Her block was still in place, which meant he’d have to get his answer the old-fashioned way.
Passing though the dining room, he sensed Heaven’s presence in the kitchen. Voices hummed within the room, feminine voices. The closer he grew to the door, the more he sensed frustration in their tone. He couldn’t understand what they were saying or why his Seeker and mother were having a private discussion. They never had before now, but when Heaven’s voice rose, he knew the current one needed to end.
As he walked inside, he saw both women. Heaven stood with her back toward the door, but not his mom. She faced his Seeker. Tears formed and glistened from the light above her. He was oblivious to her words, yet when Heaven touched her shoulder, he had to know why.
“What’s going on, Mom? Why are you crying?”
No sooner than he asked the question, Heaven faced him. Confusion twisted her soul, tormenting her to the greatest extent. Then their eyes met. The issue inducing the chaos in her heart faded with the next beat. He felt that beat, felt the way his own heart synchronized with it.
The weight of her gaze made him hold his breath. It was as if she were seeing him for the first time, or through different eyes. It made his body heat and his heart race harder, especially when he realized why. She was staring at him the way she stared at Dylan.
All other thoughts left his mind, all other thoughts but her. Though he didn’t know how he was moving, he complied with her soul when it urged his forward. He hadn’t made a conscious decision to take the first step or any that followed. It was as if she were a magnet, drawing him to her through some polarized force he couldn’t see but could feel. He couldn’t resist that feeling.
He couldn’t resist her.
When he finally stopped in front of her, the same force kept urging him forward. He couldn’t get any closer unless he took her in his arms and made love to her. Talk about awkward. It wouldn’t take long for his mother to leave the room if they started ripping off each other’s clothes. He fought the impulse to do just that.
Why was she looking at him like he was the only person who existed?
“Hey.” He managed to say the word coherently enough for her to understand. “Is everything okay?” When she nodded, he shifted his attention to the spot where his mother stood. “You still haven’t answered me, Mom. Why are you crying?”
“It’s nothing, honey.”
He didn’t miss the way Heaven frowned or how quickly she turned toward his mother. Disbelief rose in her, but she tempered it as she refocused on him.
“Layne, I, uh…” Her lips stopped moving the instant he wrapped his hand around her arm She swallowed hard. “Where’s Dylan?”
“He’s walking the perimeter with his Mom, your dad, and Mason.”
“Is everything okay?”
She waited for his response, but he barely nodded. It was hard concentrating on anything except how much she wanted to talk to him. He sensed her want, even wanted the same, but he didn’t trust himself to be alone with her. Fire blazed in their energy as it merged together. If given a minute alone, that fire would combust into an inferno. He wouldn’t waste a second of their privacy. It would be a repeat of what they started upstairs.
God he had to get this under control. He was failing miserably in keeping a respectable distance between them. It was the reason why he couldn’t speak with her, not yet. Besides, something was going on with his mom. Her energy said as much. The fact that neither she nor Heaven would say what it was only increased his suspicion.
“Everything is okay with me, Heaven, but I’m not getting that feeling in here. Would you mind if I spoke with my mother?”
Her confusion returned. Then her face softened. “Oh,” she mumbled. “Of course. I’ll, uh…I’ll go see if I can find Dylan. Excuse me.” br />
As she walked away, his chest squeezed tighter. Disappointment filled her heart the moment she realized he wanted to speak with his mother, not her. Could she not sense the desire eating him alive?
It would be foolish to tempt fate so many times in a day. As much as he wanted to hear what she had to say, he wouldn’t risk being alone with her and giving in to his want. Dylan wouldn’t be gone for long, and they’d already had a close call.
Once he knew she was out of the room, he observed his mother. She did her best to wipe away any evidence of her tears, but the redness in her nose confirmed his suspicion. She’d been crying.
“Hey there, my sweet boy. You okay?” Her voice shook a little when she spoke, but she played it off like she didn’t notice. He did.
“I’m fine, Mom. Are you?”
She patted his face as admiration sparkled in her eyes. “You’re safe and you’re here. Why wouldn’t I be okay?”
“That’s why I’m asking you. You’re upset. You were crying.”
A chuckle rumbled from her chest as she turned toward the table. “I’m not upset. These are tears of happiness.”
He watched the space between them grow. No matter how much she tried to pretend everything was okay, he sensed otherwise. Why would she keep something from him but not Heaven?
“You’re lying to me.”
Her shoulders tensed as she stood in silence, but a quick spin had her facing him again.
“Beg your pardon?”
Hasty steps brought him to the spot where she stood. She needn’t pretend to be offended by his accusation. He knew it would catch her off guard, and just like a rat caught in a trap, she went on the defense.
“Watch your tone, young man. Do not forget that I’m your mother.”
“Oh, I haven’t forgotten, but you are hiding something from me, Mom. I sense your dishonesty and your guilt.”
She parted her lips with what he assumed would be a good verbal lashing, but then she stopped. Her attention shifted to the table, toward a book in the center. It resembled the Tome of Souls, the same book they were shown when they learned the history of the Psi, as well as the Supreme Trinity.