Marriage Of Deceit

Chapter 11

  “I knew very well you were too sincere and would rather die than to accept another woman in his life. What he did to you was beyond any human action. He be fooled me saying you had fallen down the staircase. Then you had lost consciousness and were nearly dying. So taking care of your emergency was my prime duty. How relieved I was that his dad did not live to see his son’s animal like behavior. I had thought Rohit would feel guilty of killing his father, who could not bear the shock of that woman into his life and passed away the same night peacefully, leaving me behind to bear with everything and face all the consequences.” I sat there listening patiently to her as Aman sat stunned. Narrating all episodes was relieving her of the burden of guilt. So I let her continue.

  “When your parents shifted you to Mumbai hospital, I knew in my heart of hearts that I would be losing you and Aman forever. But that was more acceptable than your miseries with Rohit. Believe me Asha, there was no element of deceit on my part regarding your marriage. I do agree that my son was obstinate, demanding and very ambitious right from childhood. We took all these as his qualities for future progress. Who knew the thin line which would turn these into vices?” Then she added in soft tone
 

  When Meeta left, I entered his room, Rohit sat in his room on a corner sofa, with a bottle of scotch in his hand taking neat gulps from it. I said, “Rohit the doctor has told you very clearly, that with your cirrhotic liver, alcohol is a poison for you; please don’t make yourself worse.”

  “ He stared back into my eyes with fiery red eyes, “Who the hell wants to live anymore? Mama everything is finished. I trusted her more than life, I adored her, loved her with all my heart and soul. That bitch was spinning her web against me, and brought me on the road. This must be someone’s curse; God has sent me what I deserved. I wanted my path blooming with colorful flowers, but weeds have grown there all around me.”

  “ Then before I could hold his hand, he gulped the remaining bottle empty and collapsed on the sofa.”

  I clearly saw mama exhausted and offered her some water. She continued, “ I immediately called up his treating physician who arrived in ten minutes, and before he could do his thorough check up. Rohit vomited out a full pool of blood and became unconscious. We shifted him to the hospital where he was admitted to the emergency and his vitals restored after i.v fluids and oxygen etc. His liver had been extensively damaged, and even a drop of alcohol is prohibited, but he gets violent and demands more of it. The doctor does not agree to de addict him because of the damaged liver.

  “ I am the unfortunate mother who is gradually pushing him to death by giving him a constant supply of alcohol. The doctor explained to me that all the drugs used for de-addiction are metabolized in the liver. Once the liver is damaged with cirrhosis, all drugs fail to be absorbed.”

  Mama was silent for a moment and then continued, “I have not narrated his details to gain sympathy from any one, or to get some financial help. I think my husband left sufficient for me to survive. The two of us are now surviving on those funds. The huge amount that your parents had extended as loan has all turned to ashes. How I wish I had exercised control over his activities and nipped it in the bud.”

  Mama, went to the room, opened her suitcase, and brought out an envelope of papers, handing it to me she said, “I took this as an opportunity of meeting you two, hand over the divorce papers duly signed and extend my blessings to both of you for a bright and happy future.”

  I sat stony still lost and dazed. Aman could judge the state of my mind, the turbulence of my mind, the tidal oceanic waves of the past hitting my brain. He kept a soothing hand on my shoulder and said, “Mum, past is gone, future is oblivious, so let us just live in the present.” I nodded my head, turned to mama who was looking surprised at the maturity level of Aman. She smiled at Aman and said, “I am proud of you my son, and I congratulate Asha; despite bringing you up as a single parent she has given to you the qualities which she possesses, and which is the real asset and wealth of your life.”

  A veil of sadness and tension enveloped me and my face reflected it. I asked, “Mama, if you need any help in taking care of Rohit, I can go with you, but only after Aman leaves for US. I can understand how difficult it must be for you, with his ailment.” Her reply was very cool, “No Asha, I will manage everything alone. Take it as my repentance on my punishment for keeping silent even after seeing his atrocities towards you. I was completely helpless. I know you must have forgiven him for all his deeds, but it’s only now that the two of you are legally liberated, and I don’t want you to bear any more pain”.

  “ God has given you a chance to overcome your devastation by immersing yourself in building of a new life.” Then she kept a compassionate hand on my head and added, “Despite your not wishing anything ill for him, he has received his full share of punishment by the Almighty. This is the rule of law. We have to accept it and reap the fruits of our actions. Our destiny script has already been written when we are born, it reveals slowly and gradually as life moves forwards. I can do anything for him but cannot change his destiny. So just pray that he is strong to face the consequences.”

  The words had hardly left her lips when Aman intervened, “Mum we can always send a maid from here who could assist grandma in caretaking. I have so much of shopping list and then all the packing to be done.” I could judge his fear of this turning point in my life. My going back on compassionate grounds, would cancel all his efforts of making me agree for commencing a new life. So he did not want to take any chances.

  “No, son, there is no need of anyone going from here, his doctor friend visits him often, and I can manage the rest of his work alone. When I came here I left Rohit in his hospital where he is being taken good care of.”

  Then after a short pause she added, “I told you that this visit of mine is in no way based on acquiring sympathy or help of any kind. I have learnt this much in my spiritual pursuit that it’s all a game of destiny. One gets what is his share of luck. Nothing more and nothing less.”

  For a moment, selfishness crept into me and I thought how could Rohit have such a peaceful end? He must be doped with alcohol, sleeping day in and day out. My mind went racing to the past. I had been the most loving and sincere wife, loving him more than life itself. He did not have to face the miseries, the humiliations, the public whispers and stares which I did, of being a deserted wife. He did not deserve an easy end. He had to pay for every action of his, his beating me to death for no fault of mine. His forgery in the large amount of loan extended by my parents was still not erased from my memory. Above all his infidelity.

  Then I realized my folly instantaneously. When I had not wished anything bad for him all these years, why now, when he is already in agony and suffering.

  “Mama, I know it is absurd on my part, but I have been nursing all my mental wounds and nurturing them to keep the memories fresh in my mind, in order to maintain the hatred, and apathy for the shear name of marriage. Believe me I had decided to live my remaining life with Aman, but now I have to satisfy his demand and take care of his future more than anything. He does not want to leave me alone and has made me agree for a restart of my new life.”

  “Asha dear, I can understand all this, I would rather have wanted this to happen years a
go, but anyway it’s better to be late than never.”