The Treasure

  “Then stop struggling. The battle’s won. Go to Tarik and tell him to give it to me.”

  He shook his head. “Not because I want it.”

  “Very well, then do it because I want it.”

  “But you don’t. You told me you’d never choose it.”

  “I was afraid.”

  “And you’re not afraid any longer?”

  “Maybe,” she whispered.

  He looked at her.

  “All right, I’m still afraid. But I’m more afraid of not taking it. I won’t leave you alone. You need me.”

  “That’s a poor reason.”

  “I’m not reasonable about this. The entire idea is mad. Why should I be sane?”

  “Because I won’t let you do this for me. It has to be because you want it for yourself.”

  “Maybe I do.” She moistened her lips. “I was terribly afraid when I was running away from Nasim. I thought every minute I was going to die. I didn’t want to die. I wanted to live with you and have your children. I wanted to see Thea again. I wanted to live.”

  “Nothing is sweeter than life when you’re close to losing it. You could change your mind.”

  “I won’t change it. Why are you arguing with me?”

  “Because it means too much. It’s too important.”

  “You’re just being selfish.” She tried to smile. “You want me to grow old, ugly, and wrinkled and then you can laugh at me.”

  “How did you guess?”

  She launched herself into his arms and buried her face in his chest. “Give me the potion,” she whispered. “Please, Kadar.”

  His arms closed tightly around her. “I can’t,” he said hoarsely. “It’s killing me, but I can’t.”

  “I’ll do it anyway. I’ll go to Tarik or Layla and ask them myself.”

  “And I’ll tell Tarik that if he gives it to you, I won’t act as guardian for the grail.”

  “You told me once we had to be together. You said it was meant to be.”

  “Not like this. I can’t force you to—”

  “You’re not forcing me.” She pushed away and glared up at him. “Stop being noble. I won’t lose you. Not by your death. Not by mine. We’re going to be together. Yes, I’m frightened. Yes, I can see a mountain of problems. But I won’t let any of them keep me from having you.”

  His face was pale and taut. “And I won’t let you hate me later for rushing you into doing this.”

  “Rushing? When I can’t even convince you to—” She drew an uneven breath. He wasn’t going to yield. She would have to handle this differently. “Very well, we won’t rush. I’d rather take Eshe now and put the decision behind me, but I can wait. I’m not going to age overnight. You’ll probably find me just as desirable a wife in a fortnight.”

  “Possibly.” He smiled faintly. “But a fortnight is still not enough time to make such a choice.”

  “The choice is made. I just have to persuade you to forget your scruples. I think we’ll go away by ourselves for a little while. I don’t want you around Tarik. He has far too many scruples of his own.”

  “You wanted to return to Montdhu.”

  “Not before I take the potion.”

  “You’re afraid you’ll change your mind.”

  “I won’t change my mind. You’ll change yours. We’ll couple and talk and I’ll be so winsome and captivating that you’ll not be able to resist me.” She took his arm and started back toward camp. “So you might as well forget this stubbornness now and do as I wish.”

  “It’s not stubbornness,” he said. “It’s desperation. I couldn’t bear for you to grow to hate me.”

  “Do you think me so unfair? Never mind. You’re obviously not thinking clearly. You’ll be much more reasonable when I get you to myself.”

  “I shouldn’t go with you.”

  “But you will.” She smiled lovingly at him. “Won’t you?”

  He sighed. “I greatly fear I will.”

  “You’re being very rude,” Tarik said as he watched Kadar lift Selene to the saddle. “Are we to at least know where you’re going?”

  “No,” Selene said. “We’ve had enough intrusions. Go back to the villa. We’ll return there when we’re ready.”

  “I don’t like this,” Layla said.

  “Because you aren’t controlling us,” Selene said. “Don’t worry: In this instance, I’m doing exactly what you would want me to do. But I’ll brook no interference.”

  “I still think we should know. What if we need to contact you?”

  “Vaden knows where we’ll be. I asked him where we could find a safe, quiet cottage near Rome.”

  Selene grimaced. “And we only hope he hasn’t directed us to a hovel like the one where we found him. It would be just like his wicked humor.”

  “Vaden,” Tarik repeated thoughtfully.

  “Don’t sound so hopeful.” Kadar mounted his own horse. “I told him if he revealed our whereabouts to you I’d cut his throat.”

  “I don’t think we deserve this lack of trust,” Tarik said.

  “Yes, we do,” Layla said. “Or I do. Stop arguing, Tarik, it will do no good.” She stepped forward and gazed into Selene’s eyes. “Be sure. There’s no going back.”

  Selene nodded and turned her horse. The next moment she and Kadar were galloping down the mountain path.

  “He’s going to try to persuade her to take Eshe,” Tarik said as he watched them disappear around the bend of the trail.

  Layla shook her head. “No, she’s trying to persuade him to let her take it.” She made a face. “And I thought it was Kadar I had to warn. I should have known that once she made up her mind she’d throw caution to the winds.”

  “Why are you concerned?” His tone was mocking. “Eshe is perfect, is it not? Mankind’s savior.”

  “Not perfect, but wonderful. We just have to learn how to use it. You thought the same once.” She turned away from him to hide the hurt. “We disrupted their lives. I’m not so lacking in conscience that I’ll let them wander about the countryside with no guidance if they need it. I’ll go and see if I can find out where they’ll be from Vaden.”

  “He won’t tell you. He has a liking for Kadar.” He fell into step with her. “But I’ll go with you. I have to speak to him anyway. He still hasn’t told me his price for destroying Nasim’s forces.”

  “Are you sure you want to know?”

  “No.” His lips twisted. “But it’s better than having it hang over my head like a sword.”

  Tarik and Layla arrived at the villa two days later. The next day Vaden and his army left and headed north.

  “Are you going to do it?” Layla’s gaze was on Vaden’s retreating figure.

  “Do I have a choice?” Tarik asked. “I’d wager Vaden intends I have none.”

  “You have a choice.” She suddenly whirled on him. “Why do you always fool yourself into thinking that anyone controls your destiny but you? You’re more like me than you think. You believe you wouldn’t have given Kadar the potion if he hadn’t been hurt.

  You would have done it. Otherwise, all of your philosophy and soul-searching would have come to naught. Because you’re human, Tarik.”

  “I never denied it.” His lips twisted painfully. “But I try to limit my opportunity for mistakes.”

  “I know.” She tried to control the trembling of her voice. “Who should know better? I was one of your mistakes.”

  “No, it wasn’t—”

  “Don’t lie.” She blinked to rid herself of stinging tears. “I’ve always known it. Well, you need not put up with my presence any longer. After Kadar and Selene are settled, I’ll go away.”

  He stiffened. “You’re going away?”

  “Why not? You never wanted me here. You made that—”

  She couldn’t stay here. She was running through the corridors and out into the garden. Dear God, she shouldn’t have lost her composure. She had been so careful not to let Tarik see the pain since she had arrived here. Where
was her pride? Lost somewhere in the pain and regret and the—

  “You were never a mistake,” Tarik said from behind her.

  She didn’t look at him. “Yes, I was. From the beginning you never really wanted me. Oh, perhaps my body. But you wanted your scrolls and your learned discussions and your peaceful life. Then I came and everything was different. I made you leave the library, I caused you to be crippled and involved you with Eshe . . . and I gave you no children.”

  “And you took me out of grayness into sunlight. I had only to look at you and I came alive.” He paused. “Just as I did when I walked down that hill and saw you again.”

  She stiffened. Don’t be foolish. Don’t begin to hope. “How can you say that? You left me.”

  “You know why.”

  “Eshe. But it had nothing to do with us.”

  “It had everything to do with us. It still does. It’s what brought us together. It’s what kept us apart.”

  Past tense? Her heart stopped and then began to race. “I haven’t changed. I can’t change. Not about Eshe. I’ve tried. I believe you’re wrong, Tarik.”

  He was silent. “Perhaps we can come to some compromise.”

  She held her breath. “Why?”

  “If you’d turn around and face me, I think you’d know.”

  She couldn’t face him. Not yet. “Why?”

  “Because I can’t fight it any longer. I don’t want to fight it. I thought I wanted peace, but peace can be very dull.”

  “You say that now. But you left me before.”

  “Not because I didn’t love you. It was that damnable relentlessness. But over the years I’ve found I’m stronger than I gave myself credit for. I’ve discovered I can do battle with you if necessary.”

  “And?”

  “Why, I deserve you, Layla. For good or ill, for the rest of our years, I deserve you.”

  “That doesn’t sound like a statement of devotion to me. Ill? Do you insult me? Do you think I’d let anything bad—”

  “Look at me, Layla. I tire of staring at your back.”

  She took a deep breath and turned to face him.

  He was smiling at her. He held out his hand.

  Joy soared through her. She wanted to run to him.

  No, she had always been the aggressor. That had been part of their problem. Compromise. This time he must come to her. “You may be right,” she said unevenly. “There’s a possibility you do deserve me.”

  And he took a step toward her.

  “YOU’RE BEING VERY STUBBORN.” Selene rolled over on her back and straightened her bodice. “What does it take to convince you that you cannot live without me? I’m sure that I must be as proficient now as any of those women in that house of pleasure where you apprenticed.”

  “You concentrate on seduction of the body, not the mind.” Kadar sat up, picked up a blade of grass, and drew it teasingly over her lower lip. “But, by all means, continue.”

  She knocked his hand away. “Only because you won’t talk to me.”

  “It’s too pleasant a day for discussion. The sky is blue, the sun is bright, and you—”

  “The sky was stormy yesterday, and you would not talk then either. It’s been over a month and we’ve done nothing but make love.”

  He shook his head. “A terrible waste of time.”

  “It is when I wish to—”

  His lips covered hers.

  She bit him.

  He jumped back, and his hand touched his lower lip. “I take it you’re really sincere about this.”

  “I want to go back to the villa and have you tell Tarik to give me the potion.”

  He shook his head.

  Dear God, he was obstinate. She had not expected to have this much trouble convincing him. “You know you’ll do it eventually. I won’t have it any other way.”

  “Perhaps.”

  “What will it take to convince you?”

  “I have to give you time.”

  “How much time? A week? A month?” When he didn’t reply, her eyes widened. “A year?”

  “Five years should give you a goodly period to consider the consequences.”

  “Five—” She vigorously shook her head. “No.”

  “Have you thought why you’re so eager to have this done and over? Are you afraid you’ll change your mind?”

  “No. I want it over because it will be in contention until it’s done. I don’t want that between us. No more confusion or conflict, Kadar.”

  He drew her closer. “I wish I could believe that’s the only reason for—”

  “I want to hit you.” She pushed him away and jumped to her feet. “All right, I don’t believe this Eshe is a miracle. But, by heaven, I’m going to take it.” She started down the hill.

  “Where are you going?” he called after her.

  “Away from you. Go back to the cottage, you stupid man. I don’t want to see you for at least an hour.” She had reached the stand of trees and was enveloped in the shady coolness. She needed that coolness. She was frustrated and annoyed and she saw no way to—

  She froze with shock.

  No.

  Again.

  She staggered to a nearby oak tree and leaned against it.

  Impossible.

  “You weren’t long.” Kadar didn’t look up from the stew he was stirring in the fireplace. “Does that mean I’m forgiven? Or that you’re going to do me bodily—My God, what’s wrong?”

  “We’re going back to the villa.”

  He was by her side. “You’re pale. Are you ill?”

  “No. Yes. I don’t know.” She began to gather her belongings. “We have to go back to the villa.”

  “Tell me what’s wrong.”

  She shook her head. How could she tell him what she didn’t understand herself? “Just take me to the villa.”

  The villa was in turmoil when they reached it a half day later. The courtyard was filled with wagons loaded with boxes and furniture. Heavily laden servants were scurrying to and from the house and the wagons.

  “What’s going on?” Kadar murmured as he lifted Selene down from her horse. “It looks as if they’re abandoning the place.”

  “Not abandoning.” Tarik walked down the steps toward them. “We’re merely moving on. It’s never wise staying in one place too long. You’ll also find that to be true, Kadar.”

  “Where’s Layla?” Selene demanded. “I have to see Layla. Is she still here?”

  “Of course. But you caught us just in time.” He turned toward the door and raised his voice. “Layla.”

  “In a moment. I cannot—” Layla appeared in the doorway. “Well, it’s about time you returned. We’ve been waiting for weeks.”

  “It appears you’re waiting no longer,” Kadar said dryly. “If we’d come tomorrow, the villa would have been deserted.”

  “We would have sent word of our location. Vaden is becoming impatient.”

  “Vaden?” Kadar asked. “What on earth has Vaden to—”

  “Stop it. None of this is important.” Selene stepped forward. “I have to talk to Layla.”

  “You don’t look well.” Layla’s gaze was raking Selene’s face. “You’re very pale.”

  “I’m with child.”

  She could sense Kadar stiffening in shock beside her.

  A brilliant smile lit Layla’s face. “Again? What wonderful news. It will be—”

  “Not again. I felt life. Thea didn’t feel life until she had reached almost her fourth month. It has to be the same child. I did not lose my baby.”

  “What?” Layla asked, stunned.

  “You heard me. How could this be? You told me I’d lost the babe.”

  “I thought you had. There was bleeding . . .”

  “How much bleeding?”

  “Not too much, but you were unconscious and the shock . . . You should have lost it.” Her eyes widened as a thought occurred to her. “Unless it was—”

  “What?” Selene asked as Layla stopped speaking. br />
  “Nothing. What do I know about babies? I’m no midwife. I’ve always tried to stay away from—It hurt too much when I couldn’t conceive myself.”

  “Layla,” Tarik said.

  Layla glanced warily at him. “I thought you wanted it.”

  “Oh, my God,” he whispered.

  “Eshe,” Kadar said.

  “It was the only time I didn’t offer choice,” Layla said quickly to Tarik. “You’d given it to Kadar, and it was clear you wouldn’t want him to be alone. She loved him.”

  “You put it in my wine that first night,” Selene whispered.

  Layla’s gaze was still fixed anxiously on Tarik’s face. “I thought you wanted it.”

  And obviously that was the only thing of importance in Layla’s world, Selene realized in frustration.

  Tarik shook his head. “It mustn’t happen again, Layla. Not without choice.”

  “Oh, it won’t,” she said, obviously relieved. “But it’s just as well, don’t you agree?”

  “No, I don’t agree,” Kadar said grimly. “You robbed Selene.”

  “Of choice.” Layla turned to Selene. “But you should have lost the child. It had to be Eshe that kept it alive.”

  “You’re sure?” Selene asked.

  Layla shook her head. “We don’t know enough for me to be sure. I’ve never given Eshe to anyone carrying a child. I didn’t know you were with child when I gave it to you. But it makes sense a potion that would battle disease and strengthen the mother would also strengthen the child, doesn’t it?”

  “Yes,” Selene said dazedly.

  “Then I did entirely the right thing.”

  “You did not,” Kadar said through his teeth. “Were you going to deceive us indefinitely into believing she had a choice? Good God, you even made me promise not to give her Eshe without discussing it with you.”

  “Because I wasn’t sure what effect two doses would have on her. We don’t know enough about—”

  “You keep saying that,” Kadar said. “I’d think you’d refrain from reckless acts until you do know.”

  “Tell me that when you face a similar choice.” She turned to Tarik. “I believe we’re packed. Are you ready to go?”

  He nodded and helped her onto her horse.