Love Me Again
"And only a block from my house," Chelsea said. "So we're neighbors, and Josie won't feel like she's all alone here."
"That's wonderful," Loretta said. "Where did you move from?"
"Atlanta, Georgia."
Loretta grinned. "Ah, so big city to small town. Do you have family here?"
"Not in Hope, no. I grew up in Oklahoma, in the southern part of the state."
"So you have family nearby?"
Josie nodded. "A few hours away. This is like coming home to me. It's nice to be back in the state."
"Well, then," Loretta said. "Welcome home, Josie."
Josie grinned. "Thank you."
There was another knock on the door. "Excuse me."
"We'll head to the back and make ourselves at home," Jane said.
Loretta nodded, and went to the door to let in Megan and Sam.
"We stopped and picked up the pizza," Sam said.
"Thanks, Sam," Loretta said.
"And I brought dessert," Megan said.
"Of course you did." Loretta smiled. Since Megan owned the bakery and coffee shop in town, she always brought dessert. And it was always incredibly fattening and absolutely delicious.
Loretta saw Des and Emma driving up, so she stayed at the front of the store. "You two go on back. I'll wait here for Emma and Des."
She opened the door for them. "Where are the babies?"
"Martha has Ben," Des said. "Logan had to make a run into the next town over to look at some cattle."
"And Luke has Michael," Emma said.
"Aww, I thought you'd bring them."
"Mommies are taking the night off tonight," Des said with a grin.
"Oh, and Molly and Carter have some biz meeting or another tonight, so Molly won't be able to make it," Emma said.
"Okay."
It was hard to believe looking at both of them that they'd just had babies two months ago. They both looked trim and gorgeous.
It had taken Loretta a full year to get her figure back after she'd given birth to Hazel. She didn't know how Des and Emma had done it.
Magic genes, she supposed. She remembered Tom being unhappy that her figure hadn't returned right away. One of the many things he'd been unhappy about.
Whatever. That was in the past, and as far as she was concerned, that's where Tom and his opinions could stay.
Jillian Reynolds, who ran the Hope library, pulled up just as she was about to lock the door, so she waited. Loretta smiled at Jillian's boundless energy, at the way her hair bounced as she hurried up the stairs and onto the porch.
Jillian grinned as Loretta opened the door. "Am I late?"
"No such thing as late. You're right on time."
"Perfect. This is my favorite event, you know."
"You'd think being surrounded by books all day, you'd want to get away from them."
Jillian arched a brow. "Hello, pot; meet kettle. Do you want to get away from them?"
Loretta laughed. "Never."
"Exactly how I feel," Jillian said.
"Go on back. I'll just lock up."
She relocked the front door and headed to the back, where everyone was sipping tea and some of them had poured the wine Megan had brought. It looked like Chelsea and Jane had introduced Josie to everyone, because she was chatting away and didn't seem shy, which was good, because as Loretta had learned with this group, you just had to dive right in.
"Wine?" Sam asked.
Loretta nodded.
"Where's Hazel?" Chelsea asked.
"She's at home with a sitter. Working on training her new pup. And by pup, I mean pony."
"I've seen him," Megan said. "He's adorable. I stopped by to pet him and talk to Hazel when she was outside with him the other day. Otis, right?"
"Yes. He's a Great Dane."
Emma's eyes widened. "Oh, that's a beautiful breed. Very good with children, and easy to train. Have you brought him by the vet clinic yet?"
Loretta nodded. "One of the first things we did. We got him at the shelter, so he's neutered and up-to-date on his shots, but I wanted the doc at your clinic to check him over. He's also microchipped."
"Good," Emma said. "I can't wait to see him."
"You'll have to bring Hazel and Otis by the library for pet day next week, Loretta," Jillian said. "We read stories about animals."
"I'll be sure to do that."
"I can't wait to do that with Michael when he's older," Emma said.
"Are you still on maternity leave, Emma?" Josie asked.
Emma nodded. "One more month with my precious bundle. I'm planning to enjoy every moment of it."
"Except for tonight," Des said. "Because occasionally we need a night off."
"How about you, Des?" Jane asked. "How long are you taking off from the movie business?"
"I don't have anything coming up for a few more months, so I plan to enjoy idyllic mommyhood for a while yet." Des smiled. "And the sleepless nights to go with it."
"It's a lot of work caring for a baby," Jane said. "I can't believe I'm going to start over again. What was I thinking?"
Loretta cast a wide-eyed look at Jane. "Jane. Are you pregnant?"
"Well, not yet. Not that I'm aware of. Maybe. I threw up this morning. But it could have been the two donuts I had, along with a bowl of oatmeal." She looked up from her glass of iced tea.
"Did you take a test?" Emma asked. "I still have some extras at my place. We didn't use them all up for Chelsea's pregnancy test bonanza."
Chelsea cracked a half smile. "Yeah, I only peed on six of them."
Jane shook her head. "I'm going to wait. We've only been trying for like six weeks. It couldn't happen that fast. I mean, the last time I was pregnant was . . . nine years ago? Ugh. What was I thinking?"
"That you wanted a baby with Will because you love him?" Megan said.
"Right. I do want a baby. But I have a twelve-year-old and a nine-year-old. They're almost perfect ages. I don't need to start over again. I'm insane. I have a job I love."
Chelsea rubbed her stomach, where her tiny baby bump was just starting to show. "And you wanted to be pregnant at the same time as me."
"There's that, too. Still, a stupid idea."
Loretta laughed. "Would you like us to go get you some pregnancy tests?"
"No. I'd like some pizza. And whatever Megan brought in the way of baked goods. I'm hungry. And let's talk books, not babies. I'm going to live in denial for a bit."
Chelsea nodded. "Let's do some denial, then. And hand over that pizza."
They ate and drank, and Loretta kicked back and relaxed while they discussed the book at length. It was all positive vibes, because the book, of course, had been amazing. It was a great night. She had a glass of wine, and they all listened to Des and Emma talk about their babies while Chelsea detailed her pregnancy so far and Megan and Sam talked about setting up homes with their new loves.
It was nice to be in the company of these women. Not that long ago, she'd felt so isolated, only throwing dinner parties for Tom's friends. Not her friends--his. She'd been unbearably lonely.
And now she was making friends of her own choosing, and so was Hazel.
She had no idea why she'd waited so long to make these changes, to grow a backbone and divorce her husband. Now that she had, she was much happier.
"This is an amazing bookstore," Josie said later in the evening while everyone was up stretching and moving around.
"Thank you. How are you adjusting to life in Hope?"
"It's new and different and exciting. I love teaching at the high school, even though it's just summer school. I'm actually looking forward to the fall, when the regular school session begins and I can settle in. In the meantime, there's the house and getting all my things in place."
Loretta smiled. "I imagine that's a big enough task to keep you busy throughout the summer."
"A lot. I had a condo in Atlanta, and I sold most of my furniture, so I bought everything new for this house. It's been so much fun to just
. . . start over. New location, new house, new furnishings. It's like a brand-new me, which I desperately needed."
Loretta wondered what brought about all these changes in Josie's life, but she didn't know her well enough to pry. "I hope it all makes you happy."
"Oh, it will. I know it will. And I have amazing bookshelves in my living room that are begging to be filled. I already have some of my books that I shipped from Atlanta, but I'm anxious to buy some new ones. I'm going to stop in after school one day next week and browse your shelves."
"I'd love that."
"Thank you, Loretta." Josie looked around the bookstore. "I spent so much of my time as a child in libraries and bookstores. This feels a lot like home to me, too."
"I'm happy to hear you say that. I feel much the same way. You'll have to get to know Jillian Reynolds better. She runs the town library. She's here tonight, and I know she'll be happy to show you around the library."
"I'd like that, too. You can never have too many books, you know."
Loretta laughed. "Amen to that."
After Josie wandered off, Loretta went up to the front to organize her paperwork. She picked up an envelope she hadn't seen earlier, then realized it had a Fox/McCormack Construction label on it. Deacon must have left it with Camila.
As she walked back to the group, she opened up the envelope and pulled out a sheet of paper. There was a note attached.
Loretta: Here's the bid for the work at your farm. Talk soon. D.
Short and to the point, but she supposed Deacon was busy and didn't have time to write her a long note. She smiled at his barely legible scrawl, then remembered the notes he used to write to her and pass her in between classes. Those had been short, too, but he'd write her sweet notes about how pretty her hair looked that day, or how much he liked her sweater.
He'd always been so thoughtful, had always noticed things most guys wouldn't.
If only she'd been smarter back then, more courageous.
"Is that from Deacon?" Sam asked, coming up next to her.
She looked up. "Yes. He's going to do some work out at my farm. Repairs and things."
"Really?" Chelsea said. "And how's that going to work out for you?"
Loretta frowned. "Not sure what you mean."
"I thought the two of you weren't on speaking terms."
"Oh, we're speaking. He was over for dinner the other night."
"Really?" Jillian smiled. "That's so interesting."
"Not really. Hazel asked him for dinner. He's helping her train Otis."
"And how did that go?" Des asked.
"It went well. Otis learned to sit and stay."
"Hmm. Very interesting," Jane said.
Loretta wasn't sure what was so interesting about all of this, but she suddenly found all sets of eyes on her.
"Who's Deacon?" Josie asked. "Or am I not supposed to ask?"
"Deacon was my high school boyfriend. We broke up, and I went off to college in Texas and married someone else. Deacon owns a construction company, and he's working on a renovation project next door, so we've kind of run into each other a lot recently. My daughter, Hazel, who's nine, really likes him. Oh, and Otis is Hazel's new dog."
"So . . . let me see if I've got this straight," Josie said. "You and Deacon are exes. Your daughter likes him and you don't?"
"Oh, I don't dislike him at all. It's more the other way around."
Josie nodded. "Oh. You broke his heart?"
"You could say that. Only with a lot more complications."
"Ouch."
"Yes."
"But now Deacon came over for dinner. Which means maybe the ice is thawing around you two?" Chelsea arched a brow.
"I don't know. Maybe. He's still pretty frozen."
"But you're hot, Loretta," Sam said. "And if anyone can thaw him out, it's you."
Loretta laughed. "I think I've got enough on my plate right now without having to think about thawing out a hot man."
"Aha. You still think he's hot," Chelsea said.
"I didn't say that. Did I say that?"
"You totally said that." Jillian nodded.
"Oh. Well, hell."
Everyone laughed.
"Seriously, though, Loretta. What do you think about Deacon right now? And about the chances between the two of you?" Jane asked.
"I . . ." She thought about it. If she was honest with herself, she'd been thinking about Deacon a lot lately, and not in the hired hand or dog trainer kind of way. A natural thing, she supposed--since she'd been seeing more of him lately, it made sense he'd be on her mind.
But she had burned him so badly in the past, and she wasn't sure there was any coming back from that.
"I don't know. I hurt him."
"Men can be very forgiving," Emma said. "So give him a chance and maybe see what happens. If anyone is deserving of love and happiness, Loretta, it's you."
She'd tried for love and happiness, and it hadn't worked out so well. As far as Deacon, she'd settle for friendship. If she could get that with him, she'd be happy.
Though giving herself that honesty kick again, she knew she wanted more. And she wasn't deserving of that. Not with him.
"Thank you. I'll leave the door open and we'll see."
"Sometimes second chances can be the best thing that could ever happen, if we only allow ourselves the opportunity to experience them. But you have to leave your heart open."
Loretta looked at Josie. "Thank you. I'll definitely consider it."
Fortunately, the conversation switched to another topic and off of Loretta and Deacon, which gave Loretta a considerable amount of relief, because the focus on her and Deacon had made her profoundly uncomfortable. Not only because she honestly didn't know where she stood with him but also because she knew the reason she and Deacon were at a standstill was her fault.
And maybe it was time to do something about that instead of standing back and letting fate run its course.
She was entitled to happiness. She'd made a mistake and screwed things up when she'd married Tom. She'd let herself be swayed by other people's opinions, she'd let them make decisions for her, and when she'd decided to divorce Tom, she'd told herself that wasn't going to happen again.
She felt unsettled around Deacon. Guilty and ashamed of the way she'd treated him. But she also didn't want to open that can . . .
No, it was more than a can--it was a Pandora's Box of the past between them, and opening it might lead to something painfully explosive. So she'd avoided bringing it up, which was likely cowardice on her part. It was best to just let things happen naturally. Which meant nothing was happening.
So maybe it was time to make something happen.
Stop being a coward, Loretta. This is the new you, remember?
Right. And the new her was taking charge of her life.
Time to take charge.
Chapter 10
* * *
Deacon pulled up to Loretta's house in his work truck and unloaded his gear.
Otis was the first to greet him, bounding toward him until Deacon gave him a stern look and a firm sit command.
Otis sat immediately. Deacon smiled. Hazel had obviously been working with him over the past couple of days, because without constant reinforcement, those commands would be lost in a young dog.
Hazel came running around from the side of the house and grinned when she saw him. "Oh, hi, Deacon. Did he sit for you?"
"He did. You've been practicing with him."
"I have."
"I haven't seen you at the bookstore the past couple of days."
"I was at my Grandma and Grandpa Simmons's house. They like to see me."
His lips curved. "I'll bet they do. Did you bring Otis with you?"
She nodded. "I showed them how Otis can do sit and stay. They said he's really smart."
"He is. Let me tell your mom that I'm here. I'm gonna do some work around your house first, then I'll work on Otis's training with you some more."
She slid her
small hand in his and led him toward the house. "Let's go."
He hadn't been around many kids in his life, but he had to admit there was something about Hazel that captured him. Maybe it was her outgoing nature, her natural exuberance, or the way she laughed. Or maybe it was because there was so much of Loretta in her. But the kid just got to him.
She pushed the front door open. "Mama, Deacon's here."
Loretta was nowhere to be found. "Maybe I should wait outside."
"Nah. I'll go get her." Hazel disappeared, leaving him standing in the foyer with Otis, who licked his hand.
Deacon ran his hand over the dog's head and rubbed his ears. Otis sat--on his right foot. Deacon looked down at him.
"Off."
No reaction, so Deacon nudged his foot and Otis moved.
"Good boy." He petted him again.
"Sorry," Loretta said as she came down the hall. "I was folding laundry."
"No need to be sorry about that. If it's not too inconvenient I can go ahead and get started on the plumbing."
"Since I'm the one who's inconveniencing you, you can work on whatever you'd like. Hazel and I will stay out of your way."
Hazel looked over at Loretta. "But I wanna help him, Mama."
"No, you'd just be in his way."
"Actually," Deacon said, "I could use your help, Hazel."
Her eyes brightened. "Really?"
"Yeah. Come on over."
He laid out his tools and let Hazel help him unload the items from under the kitchen sink. Loretta brought over some boxes, and she loaded things in there.
After he turned on the water, Deacon took out his flashlight and crawled under the sink to look things over.
Hazel crawled in there with him.
"Whatcha lookin' for?"
"Rust." He pointed to a dark orange spot. "See this spot here?"
"Yeah."
"That's rust."
Hazel wrinkled her nose. "And that's bad, right?"
"Yes, that's bad. And there's a lot of it."
"So what happens when there's rust?"
"It can corrode--or eat--through the pipes, and cause water leaks."
"Oh. That can be really bad."
"You got it."
"So whatcha gonna do about it, Deacon?"
"We're going to replace all these old pipes with newer, stronger ones. Ones that won't leak."
"Okay. Let's do that."
Hazel was a surprisingly adept pupil. She learned to identify wrenches and PVC pipe, and she was good at handing him tools. She didn't get bored easily, or get offended when he needed her to move out of his way, either. All in all, a perfect assistant.
While they worked, they also drilled Otis on his sit and stay commands. And when they took a break, Deacon taught Otis the down command, which he took to right away. Good thing the dog liked treats. So Otis lay on the kitchen floor while Deacon and Hazel worked. It took a couple of hours to replace the kitchen pipes, and he had brought a new faucet, so he installed that, too.