Hector

  Chapter 10

  Hector and Noribel got off the bus at the station in Hartford. It was late afternoon, and people were starting to fill the streets on foot and in cars. It is not like the other cities, Noribel thought. She carried her bag to a phone while Hector sat on a bench and watched the people pass. She found the slip of paper she had written Jesus' number on, and called him as she had written she would as soon as they got to Hartford. But there was no answer, so she decided to ask Hector if he would like to walk around for a while before she tried again.

  They walked among the citizens as if they were tourists in town for a short time, and they did not intend to stay. They looked at everything and every person they could. Hector carried all the bags, and it was not long before his feet began to hurt from the shoes. He had not walked in them for any distance yet, and he could feel his heel becoming raw. He stopped and sat on a bench to take them off.

  "What are you doing?" Noribel asked. She had not expected him to begin acting like he were back on the island. "You can't walk around here without your shoes on...it’s not done."

  "Then I will be the first to do it," he said.

  Noribel decided it would be easier to let him have a few of his old ways, so she said nothing more and they continued to walk.

  Noribel had bought a map of the city at the bus station. She stopped and sat down on a low wall of an office building to see if she could find Jesus' college. She did find it, and although she did not know how to relate the distances on the map to the real distances of the city, she figured that they would get as close as they could before she called the number again. So they walked some more: Hector with his bare feet, two big bags and water jug, and Noribel with her plaid sun dress holding a map before her and looking for street names. Both looked as though they were trying to regain a lost tour group, and both looked and felt like they had just spent nearly thirty hours on a bus.

  All the while they walked, neither of them talked. They did not discuss whether or not they were going in the right direction, or how this or that their new home was; they were too tired for talk, and all they wanted now was a place to find a good meal and a comfortable bed. Jesus will help us, Noribel thought. He must know where we can find a place to live cheaply that is near a farm where Hector can work until I can find a good job before looking to get into a school. She expected that Jesus would help them, would be their host and their mentor, and she had no reason to think otherwise. Hector did not expect as much from his brother, and as they walked closer to him, he began to feel more and more that the Jesus they expected to see would not be the Jesus that was or was not waiting for them. For Hector Jesus had always been an apparition, a mystery, and he did not have much faith in him as a reliable person. They turned the final corner and found themselves on the campus of Trinity College. Noribel looked at her map and smiled. She walked to a phone booth across the street from the entrance to the college and dialed the number again. This time, there was an answer.

  Jesus told them to stay where they are and that he would be right over. Hector had not seen his brother for some time, and now Jesus would not have to worry about sneaking around to tell him about all the great things found in the states and in college. Hector was nervous waiting by the phone; he looked at his feet on the broken cement sidewalk, and he held his bags close to his side. He also did not want Noribel to drift too far from him. He had already caught some of the native boys looking at her as they walked by. They were Puerto Ricans too, but they did not look to him to be the type of people he would want to talk to Noribel. No, there is something about this place that makes me feel uneasy, he thought. And although most of the people he saw walk by or drive by in cars looked to be Puerto Ricans, he did not feel as though he was among his own.

  Jesus walked toward them with another man. His friend looked like Jesus to some degree, but he did not look like a Puerto Rican, and he smiled, it seemed to Hector, like a girl.

  "Ola!" Jesus said as he walked to Hector and shook his hand. "I didn't think you two would actually have the nerve to come up here to see me. But, I am glad you finally did. Tell me, did you fly in?"

  Hector stood and stared at his brother but he could not make out what it was that was different about him. His hair is a little different, he thought. And he talks a little differently, too.

  "No," Noribel said in English, "we took a boat to Fort Lauderdale and then a bus to Hartford."

  "Fantastic!" Jesus said. He lifted his hands in the air and clapped three times. His friend laughed. "Oh, how stupid of me...I forgot to introduce my friend. Hector meet my best friend in the world, Steve; Steve this is my brother Hector and his lover, Noribel."

  "I gathered," Steve said. He shook both their hands and stared into Hector's eyes. "You don't look like Jesus," he said with a smile, "are you sure you're brothers?"

  Jesus watched as his friend looked at his brother, and he pulled him by the shoulder.

  "Yes, we're sure we're brothers," Jesus said. "C'mon now, let’s go get something to eat."

  Hector and Noribel were in favor of this idea, but Steve said that he would meet them back at the room. Jesus had offered for them to stay a week or so, and the offer made Noribel more optimistic than she had been since she had seen New York. Hector agreed, if only to eat and rest, but he did not like the way his brother was behaving, and he was not sure that he wanted to stay with him when their father was not there. He said nothing about his reservations, and walked behind as Jesus walked ahead with Noribel. We will see, he thought. We will see what this great life is really like after all.

  Jesus had ordered pizza, and now the three of them sat on the two beds of the dorm room and talked. Hector could not help looking for what it was that was different about his brother; he watched the way he talked, the way he acted, but it was not one thing alone that had changed. Jesus was different as a whole, and Hector did not yet know how or why.

  Jesus was talking about his classes to Noribel, when Steve walked in. Hector was startled by the way he simply walked in the door unannounced, and there was something about his brother's best friend that made him feel uncomfortable. I do not like the way he looks at me, he thought. There is something in his eyes that I do not trust. Steve sat next to Jesus on the bed and he leaned back against the wall and lit a cigarette. Hector watched him, but he did not want to stare. He did not do a good job at hiding his suspicion though, and the two best friends looked at each other and then at Hector and laughed.

  "What is wrong with you?” Jesus asked. He was leaning against the wall too, and he sat very close to Steve. "Haven’t you ever seen two good friends before? You look at us as though we're strange or something."

  Noribel looked at Hector and tried to tell him something without speaking. She knew what was different about Jesus, and she had known since she had first met him. She also knew that neither Hector nor his father knew, and she had hoped, for their own sake, they never would know. She tried to change the subject before it got started, but it was too late.

  "Jesus," she said, "is there anywhere around here where we can get an apartment for cheap? We have to find one as soon as we can, and if you know anyone who has one for rent, maybe we could go look at it tomorrow." She knew that Jesus had no intention of hiding the fact from Hector now that they were not under the rule of Jose, and she wanted to get him out of the situation before he saw something he would not understand. "Well," Jesus began, "I'm not sure you will want to live in this neighborhood. Here, at the school, there are few problems, but out there where you used the phone is not such a great place to live. Maybe we can find you something in a better neighborhood for cheap. We'll look in the paper tomorrow."

  But Hector did not want to wait until morning to get out of his brother's room. He felt as though he was trapped in a strange place, and he felt that he was in danger. He thought about Paco the crazy man, but now he did not have his father to protect him. I wish they would stop
smiling at me, he thought. He began to get angry at himself for not having seen this before. He began to feel sick, but in a different way than he felt in Pace's house, and he knew that he would have to come up with an excuse for them to leave before it was time to go to bed. Steve lived in the room with Jesus that was all Hector had to know. When they had first gone in the room, Jesus had walked in first and separated the two beds. Now, sitting across from the roommates, Hector knew why the beds were joined and why he felt as he did. He did not look at his brother while he spoke.

  “I think we should find a place tonight," Hector said. "It would be better if we left these two alone, I think." He was visibly angry, and now no one in the room laughed at him or smiled. He said no more, and Noribel knew that he meant what he said and that they would sleep in the street before he would agree to stay there overnight. She felt bad about the way it had turned out. They gathered their bags, and stood by the door.

  "I think you're being foolish," Jesus said. "You should not feel the way you do about something you do not understand."

  "I understand," Hector said, "I know that you are a pato and your friend here is a pato too. What else is there to understand?"

  Jesus did not say anything. He watched as his brother walked away, and he did not stand to say goodbye to them when Noribel followed and closed the door.

  Noribel caught up to Hector as he pushed the door open and left the dormitory. She did not want to argue about something that was between the two brothers. Hector sat on a low wall by the street and looked down.

  "Now what are we going to do?" he asked. He did not expect there to be an answer, and he began to feel as though they would never find a place to live if they did not have help from someone who knew the area. Noribel sat next to him and put her arm over his shoulder.

  "Don't worry, Hector. We'll be all right. I still have enough money for us to stay in a hotel for a few days. We should be able to find a place."

  But Hector was not worried about finding a place—all he could think about was that they almost had to sleep in the same room with two patos. I could kill him for betraying his father, he thought. If Papa found out about this, it would tear him apart. He thought about the goose, and it all started to make sense to him.

  It was late by the time they were able to call a cab and ask to be taken to the nearest cheap hotel. They got to their room just before midnight, and they were finally able to bathe and sleep after a long journey by bus, and a longer, harder journey away from Jesus. The episode had taken its toll on Hector, and Noribel knew that he would not have anything more to do with his brother. She thought that Hector would probably begin to question the whole idea of coming to the states, and in particular, Hartford, and she decided not to talk to him about the trip or their plans or how they would find a place to live. She sat on the bed while he was in the shower, and a flock of geese flew over their room honking. Noribel listened to them until she could not hear them, and she smiled as she wondered where they were going. Probably to the field in Tablones, she thought. Those are probably the geese Hector told me he used to watch when he was younger. She lay down on the bed and thought about how beautiful it must be to be able to fly wherever you want to go. She heard the water stop and she smiled again.

  Hector came out of the shower and lay on the bed next to Noribel. He was still thinking about his brother, and he wondered how he had failed to see it before. There is nothing I can do about it now, he thought, so he turned on his side and looked into Noribel's eyes. They looked like jewels to him, like the pictures of jewels he had seen in the books his brother brought back from school when he was going to school on the island. That was years ago: back before there was a thought about girls, or green eyes in a perfect face, or the way the heart feels when you see your love run naked into the sea by the light of the moon.

  Noribel was thinking too—her thoughts were on them now, and she wondered if they would be like the geese that mate for life. She wondered if they would fly together, if they would land in meadows by shade trees where young farm boys watched and an old farm man tilted back his old brown pava to take a long drink from the water jug. She looked at Hector.

  "Do you think we will be like geese?" she asked.

  "I don't think so," he said. He immediately thought about the time he had spent in a remote house with the girl they called the goose. He became furious at his brother, for he was certain he had told her what had happened. "Why, did Jesus tell you what happened? He must have that rotten pato. Tell me what he told you."

  "No, he didn't tell me anything...what did I say? I didn't say anything about your brother."

  Hector could say nothing. I almost told her myself, he thought. That fool. He did this. He put a spell on us or something. He tried to calm down so that he could change the subject. I'll tell her that I thought she had asked me if I thought we would wind up like Jesus, that's all.

  "Why do you think we will be like ducks?' he asked.

  "No," she said, "geese; I asked you if you thought we would be like geese and mate for life. That's all. I didn't mean to make you think about your brother, I just wanted to know if you thought we would stay together for the rest of our lives and never stray from each other and never fly away from each other. That's all I meant." She felt bad about reminding him of his brother, and now she thought it may have been a bad idea to try >*~n and compare their love with the ways of geese. He is not used to such comparisons, she thought. I do not think he compares anything to anything else. At least he has never done so in front of me.

  Hector sat up in bed and looked toward the window.

  "Then .yes," he said, "I think we will be like the geese. I did not know that they mated for life. I know that they stick together no matter what. I hope you will be the same and stay with me even though I will not go to my brother for help. I can't, not now. I did not want to rely on him before, but now...now I do not even want to see his face ever again. I know that is wrong, he is my brother, but I cannot be like a goose with him. Not him, not anymore. He has Steve for that now. S~^ Let Steve be his goose and his pato." Hector felt his voice catch in his throat and he had to stop talking about Jesus.

  Hector heard a voice as he slept, and he was startled when he woke to find Noribel on the phone. He hoped it was not Jesus on the other end; she spoke English, and he could not understand what she was saying. She looked at him and smiled, and he knew that it was not his brother.

  Noribel had called the Hartford Housing Department to see if they could help in finding a place to live. As it turned out, they did have a place for her to stay, but she would not be able to include Hector as a dependant because they were not married or related. The representative from the department said she would come over to give Noribel a ride to the apartment. She would have all the forms with her, she said, and Hector could come too so that he could register as a citizen of the state. Noribel told him this very quickly, and he did not understand everything that she said. But that did not matter to Noribel: finally she had a reason to like Hartford, and she could explain the process to Hector later as it was explained to her.

  They rode to the apartment with the woman who represented the Housing Department. She and Noribel spoke English the entire time, and Hector felt proud that his woman knew how to speak another language easily and naturally. As they drove, he recognized some of the buildings from the previous day; he knew that the apartment was near Jesus' college, but he decided that he would not make a big deal about living in the same neighborhood. Well, he thought, I do not have to talk to him if I see him. I can mind my business, and he can mind his. The car stopped in front of a four story building with a large staircase and a broken window in the front door. There were people in front of the building, and Hector thought that they were probably too late and that these people had already made a claim to the apartment. Noribel and the woman from the city got out of the car. Hector followed carrying the bags a
nd his water jug. He still did not wear his shoes.

  The apartment was big enough for a family, and Noribel liked the way she was able to see a park from one of the front windows. Hector too walked around with a smile: he liked that it was a big place, and he thought that it must cost a fortune in rent. Noribel asked the woman how much the rent is in English. Hector could not understand what she had said, so he waited until they had filled out all the paperwork before he asked.

  "Well," the woman from the city said, "as I told Noribel, this apartment was being held specifically for Puerto Ricans who wish to come to Hartford but who do not have any means of paying for a place to live. As you can see, the place is neatly furnished and secure. All you, I mean, technically, she will have to do is fill out a progress report each month until she is able to find a suitable job that pays her enough to live on. At that point, she will have her food allowance reduced, and one fifth of her pay will be garnished as her contribution to the program. It’s very simple, actually."

  The woman spoke Spanish, and Hector could not understand why she did not speak Spanish the entire time. But that did not matter now. All that mattered to him was that they had a place to live, they had furniture and a big bed, and he had Noribel safe and sound in their new home. This is it, he thought. But he was not yet ready to trust what he saw; no, he would have to live there for some time before he could feel that it was safe and a good place to live with the woman he loved. He watched Noribel as she walked from room to room smiling and singing a song in English. It was a happy song.

  Noribel had time to tell Hector how they were able to get an apartment for free. She also told him that, because they had no jobs, and because they had no family in the area to help them, they were eligible for enough food stamps to buy food for a family of four. Hector did not understand though; to him, there had always been one way to get a house and one way to get food, and that way had nothing to do with being from Puerto Rico, and nothing to do with the signing of paper. One had to work in Tablones, or one had to be like Paco. He did not want to consider himself to be like either Paco, so he made sure that they were not given what they did not deserve simply because they were not natives. He made this clear to Noribel. She did not argue with him; but even though she admired his honesty, she did not intend to give back what others had decided she had a right to. She had the apartment for free as long as she wanted it, and she would do whatever she had to do to convince him that they should live there until they were both making enough money to comfortably afford an apartment paid for by their own work. Hector finally did not argue this, and it was mutually decided that they should not forfeit what they had acquired by fortune or by God.

  Noribel still had over two thousand dollars in cash, and it was time to get more clothes. All that they had brought with them had been the clothes that they had worn on the island; now, as the wind seemed to grow stronger with each hour, and as the chill seemed to come swiftly like a bird at night, there would be a need to dress like the natives. Hector would have to wear his shoes.

  Since they had moved into the apartment as smoothly and as quickly as they had gotten on a bus in San Juan, they had the rest of the day to find clothes and locate the nearest market. Neither seemed to be a problem, and they soon had a modest amount of warm weather clothing and a refrigerator and shelves full of food. Their change from a desperate couple in a strange land to a happy couple at home in their new surroundings had happened as fast as Hector's change from a farm boy into an independent man. Noribel felt as if she had been blessed by God as she carried her groceries up the four flights of stairs and into the apartment that was hers only because she needed one. How else could this be, she thought. She stood and watched as Hector tried to find a place to put an enormous box of cereal, and she crossed herself. She decided then, right there as she watched her man, that she would thank God for the first time in her life for all the beautiful things he has given her. She sat in one of the chairs and leaned her head over to the window to look down on the street. We live like a king and queen, she thought. I hope the others that live here don't hate us for all the great things we have been given. Hector turned toward her and smiled. He could not find a place to put the box, so he brought it into the living room and put it on the couch and shrugged.

  And the days of their splendor passed on like rose petals blown in the wind. Hector and Noribel did not fight, they did not wish, and they did not want. Hector had resigned himself to the idea that he should wait until they were completely settled before finding a job. They spent each hour of each day together, and Noribel did not yet want to be left alone in their big apartment while her star, her pure and simple hero, went off to work. Besides, it was decided that he should probably try to learn some English and perhaps some skills other than farming before going out to present himself to a potential employer. Hector was most stubborn about learning a skill other than farming though; he had always thought of himself as a farmer, and he was not going to let his idea of himself change easily. But he did not tell Noribel about his stubbornness for fear of upsetting their tranquility. Instead, when the subject was brought up, he would simply shrug, as he often did, and say, "we will see.”

  One day, as they were preparing to decide what to eat for lunch, Noribel decided that it was time that they thanked God for all the things He had given them. About a month had passed since they had first driven up to the apartment, and Noribel had taken that time to slowly, maybe unintentionally, consider what force or forces had seen fit to provide them with the answer to her version of their dream. She had finally decided that it was God, and knowing the little she knew of Him, she thought it was His will that He be thanked for each and every wonderful thing that He does for those He chooses to do wonderful things for. Hector sat watching television and trying to figure out what the people on the screen were saying.

  "Hector," she began, "I think it is time we pray to God and thank Him for what He has done for us."

  Hector looked at her for a time. He had never heard her say anything about God, and the sudden outburst caught him off guard. "What?" he said.

  "Well, I was just thinking; since we have been given this place to live, and since we have each other and food and clothes and everything, I thought that we should thank God for all that He has given us. I mean, we could still be looking for a place to live, or sleeping in the streets like some of the people here do. "

  "That is true," Hector said, "but why didn't you think of that when we were back in Puerto Rico? We had each other there too. We also had food and clothes and a place to live. I think if you are going to thank God for what He has given you, then you had better start when you are first born."

  "You're right," she said. "But now we have a chance to thank Him for what He has given us so far. We can make up for the time we lost."

  Hector turned in his chair to look at her. He did not understand how she had thought of God, but he knew by the tone of her voice that she was not going to be happy until he agreed that they should thank Him.

  "Okay," he said, "let's thank God so that He will not be mad at us for not thanking Him before."

  Noribel motioned for Hector to join her on the floor in a kneeling position by the front window. She prayed aloud, but she had to make up the prayer because she had never heard a person pray aloud before. Hector had, but he did not remember what was said, or how to frame his thoughts to make them presentable to God, so he repeated what she said as best he could. He did not feel comfortable kneeling, and he could not understand what difference it made. He figured that God would listen no matter how a person was situated in a room. That is, he thought, if He really cares to listen at all. He stayed on the floor next to her though, and he waited until she stood before he sat back in front of the television and resumed watching the pictures and the people. Noribel had taught him some English already, but the few words he understood were not enough to make what he watched sensible.

  M
any more days passed while the couple attempted to adjust to their new surroundings. They had what they needed; now all they wanted was something to do. Noribel thought about calling her mother, but she had been instructed to throw away everything that she had brought from Puerto Rico as soon as she had a place to stay. It was part of the plan, and Noribel did not question her mother's wishes. She threw away everything that she had that concerned her previous life. And Hector, since he did not have any formal identification, thought nothing of her actions. He did, however, stop her from throwing away his pava. He would keep that, he had said, as long as he was alive. He kept that and everything else he had brought with him in his bag safely tucked away in one of the closets they did not use. They were, by the fifth week in the apartment, completely and totally a part of the U.S.. They could not foresee, especially since they had thanked God for all that they had, anything going wrong with their world. And they made love in their own bed, by the light of their own moon, each night they were able, and each day they chose.

  To them, theirs was a marriage already sanctified by God—He had given them the time and the place, and by doing so, His blessing. They did not count hours or days, nor did they look to the uncertain future for their golden fortunes. They were content.