Sunset
“A boy!” Landon kissed Ashley’s cheek and wiped her tears with his thumb. “A healthy boy!”
His tone gave him away. She looked into his eyes, and there she saw the same fleeting disappointment. Somehow, though, as they stared at each other, the hint of sorrow vanished for both of them. God had granted them a healthy baby boy. Ashley smiled, and it made her giggle with relief and joy. Everything truly was going to be okay. She was going to be the mother of three marvelous boys.
The doctor completed the test. “Everything looks perfect. He’s a long baby. Probably wind up a basketball star.” He gave them a final smile as he headed for the door. “I’ll have the results written up for your charts, and we’ll print off a few photos you can take with you.”
“Thank you.” Landon straightened. “Today could’ve gone a lot differently.”
“Yes, well, I’m happy for you.” He nodded as he reached the door. “Go celebrate the news.”
“We will.” Landon turned to Ashley as the man left. She pulled her gown back down and sat with her legs over the edge of the table. He took her in his arms and clung to her. “He’s healthy, Ash.”
Her relief was still working its way through her heart and mind and into her body. No more fears or worry. This baby was healthy, and he would be protected by his older brothers, surrounded by cousins and in the same grade at school as Katy and Dayne’s baby.
Suddenly Ashley could hardly wait to get home. Her dad was at their house watching Devin, and by the time they had lunch and returned home, Cole would be back from school. The boys were going to be crazy with excitement about the news.
She and Landon went to an Italian restaurant near the university, and the happiness from earlier magnified so completely in Ashley’s soul that she couldn’t quit smiling. They talked about the reaction their sons were bound to have, and they bounced around a few names.
The only thing they didn’t talk about was that initial instant when they were both crushed by the same momentary heartache, when it became clear that this baby would not be a girl. Landon had so looked forward to Sarah. Neither of them dared voice that they hoped this child might be a girl too.
But the hope had been there for both of them. That much was clear in the moments after the doctor’s announcement. Not now, though. In the wake of all that today’s test could’ve shown, in light of the disaster God had allowed them to steer clear of, they had nothing but pure bliss and gratitude over the news.
They walked along a strip of boutiques, holding hands and enjoying the sunshine on their faces, and Ashley called Dayne. “We had the test!” Her voice told him the obvious—that the news was good. “He’s perfect. Completely healthy.”
Dayne exhaled hard. “That’s wonderful! Katy and I have been praying every day.”
“Thanks.” She still loved the fact that she had an older brother and that they could share moments like this. “The doctor thinks he’ll be tall.”
“Wait . . . wait!” Dayne laughed on the other end. “He? It’s a boy?”
“Yes!” The happiness in Ashley’s voice was real. “The boys are going to be thrilled.”
If Dayne was thinking about whether Ashley and Landon were disappointed about not having a girl this time around, he didn’t say so. Instead he let out a celebratory shout and reiterated that the news was the greatest answer for the whole family. “It’s so amazing, the idea that God is growing a baby inside you.” He calmed down some. “Katy and I aren’t going to find out about the boy-girl part. We want to be surprised.”
They talked a few minutes more, and then when the call ended, Ashley slipped her phone into her purse. “The others can wait. I just had to tell Dayne since Katy and I are due about the same time.”
“July ought to be some kind of celebration.” Landon stopped and peered into the shop they were passing by. It held baby clothes and vintage baby furniture. He grinned and entered the small store. “I want to buy him his first outfit.”
“That’s so sweet.” The dizziness Ashley felt now had nothing to do with the anxiety that had plagued her since she first took the pregnancy test. It was a giddy breathlessness that came from knowing the love of her life was strong by her side and that together they were about to welcome the addition of a healthy baby.
Landon seemed to know where he was headed, and as he reached the first rack of clothing, Ashley understood why. Stenciled on tiny blue one-piece pajamas were the words My daddy’s a firefighter. He held it out and admired it. “Perfect.”
As Ashley ran her fingers over the soft blue outfit, she could almost see her newborn dressed in it, ready for a peaceful night’s sleep. She put her arm around Landon’s waist and gave him a hug. “I feel like I can breathe again . . . knowing he’s okay.”
“Me too.” He held the pajamas close to his chest as he took them to the counter. By the time they paid, walked to the truck, and drove home, the boys were both out back with Ashley’s dad, carrying separate buckets and searching for critters in the shrubs that ran along the fence.
In case the news was bad, they hadn’t told the boys where they were going or anything about today’s test. Ashley greeted her dad first, and again tears filled her eyes. She hugged him around his neck. “The baby’s fine. Perfectly healthy.”
“Thank God.” The relief in his smile told them he had probably been more concerned than he let on. “We’ve all been praying.”
“I know.” Ashley kissed his cheek. “Guess what else? It’s a boy. We found that out too.”
There was a hint of bittersweet sadness in his eyes but only for a moment. “A houseful of boys. What an adventure.”
Landon grinned as he looked at Cole and Devin, still crouched intently near one of the bushes. “He has no idea what kind of fun he’s in for.”
“Mommy!” Devin dropped the bucket he was holding and ran to her, his arms open.
Ashley bent low and caught him in a hug. “Hey, little guy, whatcha doing?”
“Catching frongs! Big frongs!”
“Actually—” Cole was at her side, showing her the inside of his bucket—“they’re not frogs. They’re toads. And I caught the big one, not Devin.” There at the bottom was a grumpy-looking toad bigger than Ashley’s fist.
She reached in and touched the toad’s bumpy skin. “He’s a beauty.”
“Yep.” Cole nodded. “Papa and I are teaching Devin how to find the beauties.”
“Spent ten minutes tracking him down.” Ashley’s dad chuckled. “Cole’s a master.”
“Let me see him.” Landon took a step closer, and the boys scrambled to him. They hugged his legs and spent another minute inspecting Cole’s toad. Then Landon exchanged a look with Ashley, one that asked if now was a good time to tell the boys their news.
She nodded.
“We took Mommy to the doctor today for a test on the new baby.”
Instantly Cole turned his attention on them, his eyes wide and frightened. “Is the baby sick . . . like Sarah?”
“No.” Ashley put her hand on Cole’s back. “He’s very healthy.”
“Good.” Maturity and wisdom shone in Cole’s eyes, and he stood a little straighter. Almost as if the joy of this baby’s health was tempered by the memory of losing his little sister. “I asked God that nothing bad happen this time.”
Devin seemed bored with the conversation. He reached into the bucket and patted Cole’s toad.
At the same time, Cole realized what Ashley had just said. “If he’s a he . . . then is he a boy?”
“Yes.” Ashley laughed. This was the part she was most looking forward to, telling Cole and Devin they were about to have another brother. “In a few months we’re going to have three brothers.”
Cole grinned and gave her dad and then Landon a resounding high five. But after a few seconds, his smile dimmed. “Except—” he looked at Ashley—“I really wanted a sister. Really bad.” He shrugged. “I was used to the idea, ’cause I could take care of her and stuff.”
“You’ll tak
e care of another little brother.” Landon’s tone was subdued. “The same way you’re so good at looking out for Devin.”
“True.” Cole studied Devin, who was still stooped down admiring the toad. “I am pretty good with Devin. So maybe boys are the best for our family.”
A slight pang stung at Ashley’s heart, but she smiled at her oldest son. “That’s right. That’s how we’re going to look at it.”
Devin straightened his chubby legs and held up both hands, his head cocked to one side. “My frong?”
“Your frog is still out there somewhere.” Landon tousled the boy’s blond hair. “You’ll find him, buddy. Cole will help you.”
“Yeah, I’ll help you find a toad.” Cole put his arm around his little brother’s shoulders as they headed toward the back of the property. “Lucky for you I’m the best toad catcher in town.”
Ashley laughed. “No confidence issues for that one.”
“Definitely not.” Landon took her hand, and they watched their boys return to the hunt.
“A boy will be good for them.” Her dad stood shoulder to shoulder with Landon. “This place is a boy’s paradise.”
“And Cole really does make a great big brother.” Landon chuckled. “The kid’s a natural leader.”
Ashley didn’t add her comments to the mix. Everything they were saying was true, of course. Another boy would be a delightful wonder, a tremendous blessing to their family, and, yes, the three boys would have a magical childhood together. Ashley could already see them playing in the tree house and running through the shallow water along the shore of Lake Monroe, defending each other on the playground at school, and cheering each other on during basketball season. Staying close through their teenage years.
But for just a moment longer she grieved the piece of their family that didn’t seem meant to be. The one who would’ve worn a long blonde ponytail and split her time catching toads and playing with dolls, the teenage girl every boy who came through the house would silently marvel at. A girl who would exist only in Ashley’s heart and soul.
Cole and Devin’s sister.
Dayne sat in the back row of the theater, the same place he’d sat the first time he came here what felt like a lifetime ago. As long as they produced CKT shows out of this building, the back row would be his favorite place. He crossed one leg and settled back in his seat. From here he could watch the kids and Katy without being a distraction. Especially tonight.
It was Monday of dress rehearsal week, the night that always required the most work, at least according to Katy.
“Usually by the end of the first dress rehearsal, I’m ready to contact the ticket holders and give them their money back,” Katy had joked with him as they arrived at the theater earlier. “So we’ll see what this one brings.”
Now the rehearsal was winding up, and Dayne was surprised at the outcome. Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat was a musical in the truest sense. No dialogue whatsoever except for whatever was written into the songs of the characters and the narrators. Dayne and Ashley had come up with a number of creative sets, and by now the backstage crew knew when to rotate a certain piece and when to move a set off so another one could be brought onstage.
The songs were smooth, and the costumes looked sharp and eclectic. Depending on the scene the kids wore a mix of bell bottoms and tie-dyed shirts, jeans and cowboy hats, or poodle skirts and penny loafers. Bailey did a phenomenal job as the lead narrator. She wanted to pursue acting and musical theater, and clearly she had the ability. Still, Dayne half hoped she’d change her mind, go into something safer where she wouldn’t have to risk losing herself.
Connor was easily as talented as his sister. His rich tenor filled the theater as he played Joseph. During the rehearsal Dayne got so caught up in the story he forgot he was watching a run-through. There was Joseph, reunited with his brothers and connecting with his father after a lifetime of being apart.
In the shadows of the back row, Dayne pulled his baseball cap down low on his brow. Suddenly he wasn’t watching Joseph run into the arms of Jacob. He was sitting on a bench at the park across the street, watching his father climb out of his car and walk toward him. For the very first time.
God had given him his heart’s desire that day, brought him back together with the family he’d been separated from. Because the God of Joseph was the God of Dayne Matthews and John Baxter. The God of all of them. A God whose promises and faithfulness were certain even if seeing them come to be took a lifetime.
The song ended, and the kids onstage held their final pose.
Katy climbed the stairs and held her arms straight up in the air. Her voice rang with victory. “That was the best CKT Monday night dress rehearsal ever!”
A loud chorus of cheers came from the kids, and it took a minute before Katy had their attention again. Dayne stood and moved slowly out of his row and down the center aisle. This was one of his favorite parts, listening to Katy talk to the kids, hearing her work her gift of direction on what already seemed like a great show. He took a spot off to the side in the front row and gazed at his wife. They were halfway through April, which meant she was six months along. She wore a flowing maternity top and stretchy pants, and her stomach looked like she was hiding a perfectly placed basketball.
“You know what they say,” he’d told her the night before. “When you carry the baby out front, it’s usually a boy.”
“Oh, okay . . . now you’re an expert.” Katy laughed. “Wasn’t that a line in one of your movies?”
He tried to keep a straight face, but he broke. “How’d you know?”
She kissed him on the lips and let her face linger near his. “Because there’s no truth to it.”
Ashley was having a boy, so a boy would be nice for them too since the two cousins would be the same age. But it didn’t matter. He just wished July would hurry and get here. Dayne readjusted his baseball cap and watched Katy flip through her yellow notepad.
“Connor . . . on the scene where the brothers are groveling, I need you to work the stage a little more.” Katy made a sweeping gesture with her hand. “You can storm to a brother on one side and then spin around and track down another brother at the opposite side. We need to see your indignation and anger.”
“Okay.” Connor was hanging on every word, same as the others.
“And, Sydney, you’re playing the bratty younger narrator, and you’re doing a great job.” Katy walked closer to the girl. “But I want to see you doubt yourself once in a while. So go ahead and sing those big notes, get in front of Bailey and Julia, and be a show-off. But then you have to get a sheepish look—” Katy made a nervous face while she glanced over her shoulder—“like that . . . so we see that you’re aware you might’ve overstepped your boundaries.”
“Good.” Sydney nodded. “I like it.”
Pride for his wife warmed Dayne to his core. Katy had no idea how good she really was. She could’ve become a director for the big screen. But she didn’t want any sort of fame. She would use her talent here, and that would be enough. More than enough.
That night back at their lake house, Katy was tired and they turned in almost as soon as they got home. The nights were still cool, but April had brought warm enough temperatures that Dayne left their patio door open a few inches. The breeze felt refreshing as it drifted over them.
They were lying side by side, talking about the show and all Katy hoped to accomplish in the coming week before Friday’s opening night, when she sucked in a breath. “Oh . . . wow, I really felt that.”
“The baby?” Dayne’s heart picked up its pace. She’d been feeling flutterings and movement for several weeks, but every time he laid his hand on her belly the baby was still.
“Feel this.” Katy took his hand and laid it on the right side of her swollen stomach.
Dayne spread his fingers over her bare skin, and at almost the same time he felt a soft jabbing motion against his palm. “I felt it! That’s amazing.”
She giggled. ?
??I know. Sometimes I lie here and try to imagine whether it’s an elbow or a knee.”
“Or a foot.” He shifted his hand, and again something pushed against him. “That definitely felt like a foot.”
“She’s a feisty little thing.” Katy’s eyes danced. “’Cause you know what they say . . . if you carry straight out in front, then it’s definitely a girl.”
Dayne didn’t care if it was a boy or a girl. The only thing that mattered was that here in this moment he was having his first contact with a child who would always be a part of his life. His baby. He leaned in close to Katy’s stomach. “Hi.” His voice was as soothing as he could make it. He looked at Katy, uncertain if he was talking loud enough or if she thought he was crazy.
“Go on. She can hear you.”
Dayne gulped. Nothing in all his life had prepared him for how this felt, feeling his unborn child moving beneath his fingers. “This is your daddy. You’re a very loved little baby. And we can’t wait to meet you.” The baby moved again. “Jesus is with you. He picked you out just for us.”
After a minute or so, the baby grew still. Katy stroked Dayne’s hair. “You must have the golden touch. You’re going to be the best daddy ever. I mean, look at that—you helped her fall asleep.”
“He’s a good boy. He knows it’s nighttime.” Dayne loved this, the way he could mirror her teasing, and neither of them took the matter seriously. He was about to give another reason why the baby would no doubt be a boy when the phone rang. Dayne looked at the clock. It was nearly ten. “Strange.” He shifted to the nightstand and picked up the receiver. “Hello?”
“Dayne, it’s Bob.” His friend sounded happy and upbeat. “Didn’t wake you, did I?”
“Not at all.” Dayne leaned against the headboard and grinned at Katy, who had turned onto her side so she could see him. “You won’t believe this. I just felt my baby move for the first time.”