Leonard
Chapter 6 - Almost Human
It was as if the world stopped for a few seconds to offload passengers and pick up new ones. “Doc, no treatment?” John asked shocked. “Unfortunately John this illness is extremely new and although there is research on the go, as we speak, they don’t even know where it comes from. It is impossible to isolate the virus because it changes form and attack the white blood cells to destroy your immune system. This is also the reason why the medicine that has been developed does not work. I am sorry to give you this news just before your vacation.”
“Okay Doc, how do we fight it?” John asked with tears flowing down his cheeks. “Well John as I have it, lots of good fresh foods, keep warm and stay away from sick people. This will help to stabilize the CD4 count. The biggest risk for Annette is infections, so watch out. The other thing is you can get it from Annette by working with her blood if you have open cuts that come in contact with her blood, blood transfusions, sharing drug needles and sex. If she starts bleeding, do not touch the blood, rather rap it in a towel and bring her in so we can help her.”
“Last question Doc, how long does my baby girl have left to live?” Doctor Mustard looked at Annette and John shrugging his shoulders, “I don’t know John. We don’t know how long she has had this virus, but the life expectancy is between seven and ten years depending on the lifestyle. We in the medical profession just don’t know enough about this virus, but as I learn more I will inform you. My best advice for now is go on the holiday and go and enjoy yourself. If Annette looks like she is getting a fever take her to the nearest hospital, okay? O and enjoy the time together and make the most of it!”
I could see the heartbreak and pain in John and Annette’s eyes. John walked to Annette and picked her up from her chair, he could feel the anger of years gone by and the hurt she kept guarded in her soul. He could feel the heaviness in her body and the regret of so many years wasted on anger and pain, “Hey my baby girl we will be okay! We will fight this virus tooth and nail and we will win, okay.”
Annette folded into her dad’s arms, it was as if 29 years of collecting the sorrow, pain and anger dammed up in her soul and that this was the last drop that broke the dam wall. Annette’s legs gave in and John had to slowly sit her down on the floor, with him still holding her. She cried until there were no more tears to cry.
John and Annette walked out of the hospital with an emptiness in their hearts and souls that could fit all of the water from the oceans of this earth. “Daddy, I am so tired!” Annette whispered in the car. “In my life I have paid over and over for one stupid mistake in my teen years! How much more daddy?” John looked at Annette, “My baby girl I have asked that question to God, your mom and many other people with no answer. I don’t know my baby girl, I just don’t know.”
Marie and Leonard were so excited to go to Knysna that they packed the entire caravan before John and Annette returned. As John and Annette stopped, Marie could see the clouds of despair hanging over the heads of Annette and John, “Hey you two, what did the doc say?” John climbed out of the car and pulled Marie close to him, “Doctor Mustard says Annette has got AIDS and that she is going to die!” Marie nearly fainted and held on to John to regain her balance. Marie looked at Annette and grabbed her by the arm as Annette tried to walk past, “Baby girl, come here!” Annette stumbled over her feet to keep up with the force that Marie pulled her closer and found herself in her family’s arms of protection and love.
Leonard could see that something was not right and ran closer, “Mommy you okay?” Annette wanted to give him a smack just for asking, but saw in that moment, for the first time in her life, the love that this boy had for her. His big blue eyes engulfed her and she kneeled down and grab him, “My boy for so many years I mistreated you, abusing you to the point where I nearly lost you and every time you came back for more, to show me how much you love me. I don’t know why you did this for me, but I thank God that you did. Mommy is a bit sick but we will win this! Grandpa and I know what to do so we will fight with all our might and all you need to do is pray for me, okay!” This news brought tears to Leonard’s eyes, “Mommy, are you going to die?” “Not now my boy, not now!”
Liza came running from the house, “Yippee, we are going to the sea! Yippee!” She was totally unaware of the news. This was maybe a blessing in disguise and the mood lifted because of this little spark of excitement that came running into the darkness of the moment. John looked at everybody, still with a tear in his eye, “Hey you guys have you finished packing?” Marie and Leonard laughed, “O yes Grandpa we can go now if we want to!” John looked at Annette and Marie, “Okay let’s hook up and leave early, we can sleep over in Hanover and then in Oudtshoorn the next night. We can go to the Cango Caves and ride the ostriches on the Safari Farm. Who’s in?” The excitement rushed over them and for a little while they forgot about the news and what could happen with Annette if she fell sick again.
They left that morning at about eleven o’clock. The caravan was heavy with everything that was packed away and their Mercedes Benz C200 could not go faster than 80km/h. It was hot as they started to enter the Karoo near Koffiefontein. They eventually arrived in Hanover at around seven o’ clock that night. Lucky for them they found a hotel that could accommodate them for the night and John bought them some russians, chips, bread and milk for dinner. This was normally their Sunday evening treat at home, but tonight was special because they were on holiday.
Leonard and Liza were so tired that they fell asleep while they were still eating. It was so funny to see Liza bite a chip with her eyes closing and her face going forward and backwards as she tried to put the chip in her mouth. Leonard said he was just resting his head on the table and before he knew it, he was catching the big fish in Knysna. John, Marie and Annette, still reeling from earlier that day, decided that the best way forward for now was to enjoy this holiday and when they get home, decide on a battle plan for the future.
The next morning came too soon for the grownups with Leonard and Liza making coffee for everybody. They could not wait to get on the road to go and see the caves and ride the ostriches. Marie got some breakfast supplies out of the caravan and made some bacon, eggs and toast to eat. Leonard was finished way before everybody else and washed the dishes as the family finished one by one. “Okay, okay Leonard we get the message!” said John as he finished his breakfast. They left for Oudtshoorn around six o’ clock that morning with a good seven hour drive to go. It was around one o’ clock that afternoon when they arrived at the motel and hooked off the caravan.
First was the ostrich farm where Leonard got onto the ostrich to ride. The instructor told him to pull back on the neck of the ostrich to make it go slow or stop and push it left or right to make it turn. Leonard felt the bird breathing under him and as if the bird could smell the fear, it took off. It ran through the race course passing the end line without stopping. It ran into the meadow as Leonard held on for dear life. Eventually, after ten minutes of screaming, he remembered to pull back the neck and as if by magic the ostrich stopped. As Leonard was about to jump off the bird, he heard screaming, “Nay my boss stay on! I am coming!” Leonard did not know that if he would jump off the ostrich it would turn on him and try and kick him. He did not care; this thing would not run with him again. Lucky for him he could not get his one leg out under the wing of the ostrich and had to sit till the instructor came, “Hey my boss, but you can ride this bird! Not one of my jockeys could catch you!” The instructor laughed as he took Leonard back to John.
Leonard still shaken up from this high speed race through the camp, could not believe how beautiful the Cango Caves were. The guide took them through each chamber explaining how the stalagmites and stalactites were formed and it was a blast going through the Devils Chimney with grandpa. It was very late that afternoon when they returned back to the motel. John decided to take some meat out of the caravan to barbeque for dinner that night, “Leonard my boy so you now know how to ride an ostriches! You were a pro my boy!?
?? Leonard just smiled and was glad that they did not tease him because he screamed like a little girl.
The next morning it was Grandpa John who woke them up for breakfast, “Come on you lot we only have three hours to go then we are at our campsite in Brenton. If we are lucky the tide will be right so we can get some bait for fishing! Come on lazy bones!” You could feel the excitement in the air as they left for Brenton after eating breakfast.
They arrived at “Brenton on Lake” late that morning as the tide was busy pushing in, “Grandpa are we in time for the bait?” asked Leonard. “No my boy, sorry, but tomorrow is another day. We can get the bait early in the morning and then tomorrow afternoon we will go fishing. Now we are going to book in, pitch the tent, pack out the caravan and when we are done we are going to barbeque some chicken. You and I my boy will catch the fish tomorrow.” Liza looked at grandpa, “Grandpa what about me? Can I also fish?” “Of course my little princess. You can help us catch the bait and I will give you as small rode to fish with us okay?” “Yes grandpa. Grandpa, what is bait?” John smiled, “Annette why don’t you tell her?” Annette got a shiver down her back as she remembered the mud prawns she had to help pick up when her dad pushed them out of there holes with a can, “Dad I think you can show them tomorrow. Lucky for me the kids are big enough to help and I will take the pictures but pick them up, NO WAY! Is that a deal, daddy?” John laughed as he nodded, “Okay my girl.”
They got to their stand looking out over the Knysna Lake and pitched the tent unpacking the caravan. John started the fire for their barbeque, “Grandpa where is the waves?” asked Leonard. “I have learned at school that the sea has waves, but this looks like a dam except for the water that goes low and high.” John looked at his grandchildren and thought of a story to tell them when Marie saw his eyes, “John, don’t tell them that story! You know Annette refused to sleep for four days after that.” “Okay, okay I will not tell them about the big wave in the ocean that causes the water to come in and out like they see and then sometimes break trough to drown everybody in the camp.” Liza and Leonard started screaming, “Are we going to drown grandpa?” Marie looked at John with the evil eye, “John, now was that necessary?” John laughed so hard his tummy hurt, “Okay you two grandpa was just joking. Okay listen carefully, do you hear the noise? It sounds like water crashing in?” “Yes grandpa we can hear it.” “Well that is the sea and the waves are there on the coast, I will go a show you tomorrow, okay. We are very safe here so don’t be scared okay!” “Yes grandpa” Leonard and Liza sang in unison.
As everything went quiet in the camp, Annette looked up at the sky and saw the stars and moon shinning from above. She looked at the creation thinking about her life and could not believe that her life turned out this bad. The tears was running down her face as she started to sing that song she sang so many years back, Amazing Grace how sweet the sound. It was as if all her emotions ran into this song and she could hear the music in her mind as she sang the lyrics, “God I know it has been long since we have spoken and I know for many years I did not believe in you, because of what happened, but I am sitting here before you and asking that you think of me, Annette. I know I am going to die one of these beautiful days, but I am asking you to forgive me for what I have done to Squeal, Leonard, my mom, my dad, myself and most off all against you. Please God help me to get through this sickness and please help me get things right between myself and my boy before I die and God when I die, think of me! Amen”
Annette looked at the lights drifting from “Teason Island” and felt the breeze blowing warm over her skin when she heard the sounds of a guitar playing just behind their campsite. She walked over to listen to the music when she met Niel. Niel was an old man, living in the caravan park for the last five years. He lost everything after his wife died because he looked for help in the wrong places, just like Annette. He had his old Chrysler motorcar, caravan and guitar left, after he lost his job and the bank came feeding on him like sharks on a dead seal carcase. As he played, she could see how his whole body shone as he was singing the same song she did just a few minutes ago, “Good evening sir, my name is Annette.” Niel stopped playing, “I believe you know this song, please sing with me!” Niel invited her. Annette smiled, “Don’t sing anymore sir, my voice is broken.” Niel smiled, “Did not sound broken to me and in any case, before God it sounds like a beautiful angel choir singing. There is no right or wrong before His majesty. Come on, let’s just sing.”
Annette could not hold back anymore and sang that old hymn over and over till her voice was almost gone, “By the way, my name is Niel and I only know this one song, my wife taught me. I miss her so very much, but I know she is with God now. Annette, I don’t know you from a bar of soap, but it is as if you were sent here. It is as if God planned it so you would be here and I feel that God needs you to know that He has heard your prayer little one and that He never left you nor forsaked you. When all the things happened to you, He was there and He will be there now when you need him most.”
Annette could not believe how she just prayed to God and how He now has answered her, “How did you know Niel?” Niel smiled, “Annette, when God cares for you he always answers you, even when it takes years for that answer. I am now going to sleep, hope to see you tomorrow and then we can sing a few songs I taught myself. I would love to hear you sing more. You sing like this new girl, what’s her name? O yes, Bonny Taylor!” Annette smiled as she said good night and walked off into the night wondering who this Bonny Taylor was.
Leonard could not contain his excitement the next morning to go and get the bait for their fishing that evening, “Grandpa? Can we go and get the bait now?” John still tired from the long drive could only muster, “Leonard go back to bed it is five o’ clock in the morning!” Leonard ran outside and was amazed at how low the water went down. He could see the mud banks with seaweed on them gleaming in the morning sun. He saw the little holes in the mud and was amazed how the water would spurt out when he stepped on them. The quite around him was broken by the scream of the fish eagle, gliding above him and the colour’s in the sky seamed to mix from a dark purple to a bright orange as the son was rising.
Leonard walked back to the campsite to go and trace up his fishing rod. He was done when John eventually came out of the tent to go and brush his teeth, “Look grandpa I am ready for the fish!” John laughed, “Leonard, nice trace my boy, but this is the sea not the dam. We are going to do the trace a little different. Let me finish brushing my teeth and then I will show you how to trace up and then, while I make breakfast, you can trace up both our rods, okay?” Leonard now a little frustrated, “Okay grandpa but hurry! We need to get the bait as well!” John walked off to go and brush his teeth, thinking to himself, “If Leonard knew how much work the prawn pumping was he would not be so eager.”
John came back to camp about fifteen minutes later. “Leonard did you cut off the other traces?” Leonard smiled, “Yes grandpa and everything has been put back. Please show me the new trace!” John walked over knowing that to stall this moment would most probably send Leonard over the edge with excitement. “Okay my boy now listen carefully. You take this silver hook and tie it like I showed you with the swivel. You remember?” Leonard looked at John, “Yes grandpa, you put the line through this little hole, pull it through as long as my thumb, twirl it about seven times and then push it through the little hole at the bottom and pull tight?” John was impressed at how detailed the description was, “Yes that is right! Then my boy, you measure the line as long as your arm and tie the swivel at the one end. Then you take one of these round sinkers and push your line through the hole and then tie that to the other end of the swivel. You understand?” Leonard nodded and started working. It took him twenty minutes to complete the task and John came to inspect, “Well done my boy! It’s perfect! Tonight the fish must watch out! Now come eat your breakfast so we can go and get our bait!”
Leonard rushed to the table and gulped down his breakfast when
Marie laughed, “Slow down Leonard! The bait is not going anywhere.” After breakfast John got the prawn bucket and the prawn pump ready. Annette got the camera and the family walked down to the prawn banks. John took the pump and put it over the hole and pressed down. Out of three holes came water and mud squirting, it splashed all over Leonard, at his feet was his first prawn to pick up. The little animal had a soft tail with a hard body. It looked like the crayfish pictures he saw in class just smaller. He picked it up, “Ouch! It pinched me!” John laughed, “Don’t worry my boy tonight you will pinch him right back!”
It took them about an hour to get enough bait for the fishing that night. Leonard was covered in mud and water from head to toe. John sent him to go for a quick swim to wash off the mud. Leonard washed off the all the mud, but when he returned from the swim he still smelt like rotten mud, Annette chased him, “Leonard go and shower now before you go and play! You smell like rotten fish!” Leonard showed Liza the prawns and when he came closer she started screaming, “Leonard enough now, go and shower and then you can show Liza the prawns, okay!” Leonard grabbed his towel and soup and disappeared.
“Dad I met the old man behind us last night. What a nice man!” John looked at her, “Man? Nice?” over protective as he was, “You okay Annette?” “Yes dad. I was singing at our camp fire and looking at the stars when I heard him playing Amazing Grace. I walked over and listened to him playing. We talked and sang till the small hours of the morning. He says I sing like Bonny Taylor, whoever that is?” John smiled, “She is an international singer Annette. Her voice changed after a throat operation and she started talking too quickly. She only became a star after that. Nice compliment from him. Maybe tonight we can go over and then we all sing, okay?” Annette smiled, “Yes dad that is if you don’t sit next to the water till midnight!”
The evening could not come quick enough for Leonard. After having a late afternoon snack, John picked up the fishing box and the rods. Leonard’s job was to carry the bait and the snacks for later next to the water. It took them about fifteen minutes to get to their spot. John sat down and took the hook and put the prawn on the hook. It only took a minute for the fish to finish the bait on the hook, “Grandpa show me how to bait my hook!” John took his empty hook, “Okay Leonard, you take the prawn by his tail and then you push your hook from the back to the front. When it goes into the prawn’s chest you push the point of your hook through the hard part here, you see?” Leonard could hear the hook point crushing through the chest bone of the prawn, “Yes grandpa!” “Then you are ready! The rest you do as normal. Be warned the fish bite quick, so you must get your line tight quickly otherwise you miss it. Let me show you and then let’s catch them.” John threw in his line and let Leonard feel his line. It gave little ticks and then it was gone, “Okay my boy you feel those ticks?” “Yes grandpa.” “Well that is the fish biting! You need to strike when you feel that and if you are lucky you will hook the fish!” It took Leonard only 3 casts to get his first sea fish on the line. He remembered how he played with the fish and how it was a big one. The fish in the sea was much stronger than at the dam and Leonard thought his fish would be at least 2kg, “Wow grandpa this fish is big!” John smiled, “Well get it on the side so we can see.” When the little grunter was on the side it was not even 300g and John could see the disappointment in Leonard’s eyes, “Leonard you see, here at the sea the fish are much stronger and not as lazy as at the dam, but this one is big enough for breakfast tomorrow!”
Leonard was so proud of his first sea fish and also the first fish for the holiday. As it was with Leonard’s fishing luck, the big one was not far off. He put the prawn on as Grandpa showed him and decided to put an extra one on the hook just for good luck. This seemed to do the trick and it was a few seconds after the bait hit the water that the fish took the bait and ran. John saw that this was no small fish and walked over to help Leonard, “Okay boy just as I showed you, play with it!” Leonard looked up at John, “Grandpa, I haven’t set my reel ratchet yet to play with the fish, look!” John was amazed and all he could do was to hold on to the rod while the fish cleaned out the spool of line, “Grandpa stop the fish, please stop it! I want to see how big this one is! Please grandpa help!” John could not help but smile, there was no way that he would be able to get this monster out of the water it was way too strong for their fishing line. “Wow my boy what a fish! Pity we could not get it landed but be sure my boy that was a monster! Nice fish to finish of our prawns so let’s go home now, we have caught 5 nice fish and I bet grandma, Liza and your mom are hungry!” Leonard was so disappointed that he nearly cried all because of that big one that got away.
They arrived at camp and had the story of the big one that got away to tell his mom and grandma. John barbequed some chicken and invited Niel to come eat with them. Niel brought his cassette player with him and played them a few songs from Bonny Taylor and then asked Annette to sing with him. John, Marie and Leonard were amazed at exactly how much Annette sounded like her. Her voice still husky and rough made the most beautiful sounds that brought tears to their eyes, at long last their daughter can now sing without crying.
They enjoyed the holiday and each day Leonard would be up to get the bait. The fishing was good and they sold some of the fish they caught in the camp. It was two days before Christmas when Leonard saw his mom sweating and shivering even though there was no wind, “Mom you okay? You look sick.” Annette, not wanting to spoil the fun smiled, “Think it is something I ate Leonard. I will be okay my boy!” Leonard remembered John saying that they should be careful with Annette and when it looked like his mom was sick to tell him. “Grandpa, I think mommy is sick! She is sweating and shivering...” John jumped up, “Marie where is Annette?” Marie could hear the urgency in his voice, “In the caravan John!” “Please come quick!” John called. In the caravan Annette was in bed with a bad fever, “Annette why didn’t you tell us?” Annette was shivering so bad that her teeth were rattling against one another, “Dad I am sure this will pass, so I did not want to spoil the fun!” John scooped her up and ran to the car, “I am taking her to the hospital. I will be back later when we have seen the doctor!”
John put Annette in the car and rushed to Knysna hospital. They arrived there twenty minutes later with Annette having convolutions because of the fever. John ran into the hospital, “Please come and help me, my daughter is sick!” A doctor and nurse came running and helped put Annette onto a trolley pushing her into the emergency room. After what felt like days to John the doctor came out, “Hi, my name is Doctor Linde. We have your daughter’s fever under control. Can you tell me what symptoms she had?” The relief washed over John’s face, “Thank you Doc. I need to get her back to Kimberley as a matter of urgency. My daughter has got AIDS and the slightest infection will cause this kind of reaction. Can you help me with this Doc and if so, when can I take her home?” Doctor Linde looked at him, “Sir, what is AIDS?” John explained to her what AIDS was and how it worked, just like Doctor Mustard explained to him. He gave her Doctor Mustard’s number to confirm the details of the transfer, “Okay Mr Botha, as soon as Annette is stable enough, we will arrange a transfer, in the meantime I will confirm with Doctor Mustard the details and transfer arrangements.”
It took Doctor Linde three days to get Annette stable enough to transfer her to Kimberley. A Red Cross emergency flight was arranged with Doctor Linde overseeing the transfer herself, “Okay Mr Botha, we will be flying out from George Airport tomorrow morning. Doctor Mustard will receive us at Kimberley Airport where I will hand her over. Drive back safely and know I will look after her as if she was my own daughter.” John left the Hospital that night with bitterness in his heart, “Marie! Annette will be flying out tomorrow morning back to Kimberley. I want to leave to meet her there, but we need to pack up now to do so!” Marie took John in her arms, “Whatever you want John.”
Niel came round the corner of the tent when he heard John and Marie talking, “John!” Niel called, “Is
Annette okay? Can I help you in anyway? You know Annette has become like a daughter to me in this short time, so please let me help you! I know your thoughts are with Annette now so go and meet her, I will arrange the rest here...” John looked at Niel surprised, “Niel how can you help me now? My daughter is critical and we have lots to do before we leave!” Niel smiled, “You know John, your daughter gave me some purpose in life again and filled my life with hope. The least I can do is to help you. Go and sleep now and tomorrow you and the family leave for home. I will pack up your caravan and get your money back from Brenton management for what is left of your holiday and bring the caravan to you in Kimberley.”
John was shocked at the offer Niel made, “You will do that for us? Don’t you work?” Niel laughed, “John, I have lots of time because I am retired. Just go and drive safe. I will see you in three to four days time with no cost to you, just because I can!” “Thank you Niel, but what about the costs I cannot let you pay it?” “John that is not a problem, if you then insist I will use the money Brenton gives back and for the rest it is on me, okay!?” John could not believe the generosity of this man they barely knew for two weeks, “Deal my friend, see you there!”
They packed their clothes and left for Kimberley early the next day. John was not as conservative with the petrol going home and picked up two fines for speeding. They arrived in Kimberley early evening that day and stopped at the hospital to check on Annette before going home. “Doctor Mustard? How is she?” Doctor Mustard looked concerned, “John tomorrow you need to give Leonard a big present. If it was not for him, Annette would have died. She is now stable and resting and should be out in a week or so, but let this be a lesson to check on her more.”
Annette still delirious from the fever felt like she was floating between heaven and hell with her head filled with pain due to the fever, “Wow this hurts! Where am I? Did I die?” An all too familiar voice came floating on the wind burning her brain, “Hello Annette, it’s me again!” Annette looked straight into the eyes of Lucifer, “What do you want? I have done my part of our contract!” Lucifer smiled with his yellow teeth gleaming, “Well I am here to come and get you for Squeal. You see, my deal with Squeal was you, so please die now so I can finish this damn deal!” Annette got scared, “I will not die for Squeal!” Lucifer smiled, “Well that choice is not yours to make. Your body is dying and if I may say so, you could not have chosen a better way to go! You have no chance of healing so just give up! For now I have brought Squeal along to keep you company. Hope you enjoy it!”
Annette was scared and could see Squeal coming closer. She remembered the pain, hate and fear he caused her, “You stay away from me you demon!” Squeal looked at her with so much love that Annette could feel how it burned her soul, “Annette calm down, I don’t have a lot of time, so listen to me. I know sorry does not cut it, but I need to ask you for forgiveness. This Lucifer thing deceived me. He lied to me and he is lying to you now. You are not going to die yet, but please, when you go back, love my son for me. I loved you like I never loved someone Annette, just a pity this demon twisted the deal we made. Now go back to life and never come back to this place. Believe me, this is not called hell for no ‘reason. Here he comes! NOW LEAVE!”
‘Lucifer was extremely upset with Squeal, “Where is that whore?” Squeal just smiled, “Back with the living where you can’t touch her!” Lucifer screamed at Squeal, “NO! You have broken our deal! You have given your bride away you idiot!” Squeal just kept on smiling even though he knew he was heading back to the darkness, “No Lucifer, I set her free! Neither my boy nor Annette will be yours as I said. You may have deceived me, but Annette’s God heard me and will protect them against you!”
Annette woke up, “Squeal, I understand and forgive you! If you can hear me Squeal please forgive me for what I did to you!” Annette got discharged seven days later with strict instructions and a bag full of medicine. Leonard and Liza could not wait for their mom to come home so that they could spoil her. Annette could not believe how the kids ran to bring her food, coffee and tea. Niel arrived that Saturday with the caravan and stopped in front of the house, “Hi John!” John came out to greet his friend whom fast was becoming like a brother to him. “How is Annette?” John smiled, “She is home Niel. If you want you can go to her room after dinner and a nice bath.” Niel smiled, “O glory that is good news! Okay let’s just first park the caravan and then I will hit the bath. I think I need it after the Karoo, I must smell like a bokom!”
After dinner Niel walked to Annette’s room, “Hey Annette, glad to see you at home! You okay?” Annette still a little oozy looked at Niel, “Hi, glad you are safe! Jip, I am okay just had a weird dream about my past.” Niel looked at this sick young lady, “Annette that brings me to my reason I need to see you. As you know I have a bit of a gift and on my way here I picked up a young man. I dropped him at his mom’s house and he asked me to tell you that he has heard you and that you are forgiven. I believe his name was Squeal or something like that and that you would understand. Strange name for this boy!” Annette turned on her side with a big smile, “Thank you Niel! You just answered my dream!”
Niel left just after New Year with Leonard gearing up for Standard 6. Leonard arrived at Technical High School Kimberley for his first day and was taken to the hall for a short introduction and the formal opening of the school year of 1982. It was not long before some of his old friends told the seniors of his connection with Annette and her connection with Squeal. The seniors debated on his name but eventually the name Squeal stuck like bubble gum to your shoe!
That afternoon he arrived home and had to make a name board to hang around his neck, “Grandma, can you help me with this name board?” Marie agreed but when she came to the name she erupted with anger, “Who gave you this name?” Leonard was confused, “Grandma? The seniors gave it to me! Why are you so upset?” Marie looked at him, “You are not like him! How dare they!” Leonard, now even more confused looked at his grandma as if she was an alien that just walked into the room, “Grandma like who?” Marie walked out of the dining room without answering him.
That evening Marie, John and Annette was sitting in the garden when Marie could hold her anger no more, “You know what the kids at school are calling Leonard?” Annette smiled, “Yes and it is funny that he got his dad’s nickname.” Marie gave Annette the evil eye, “Glad you think it is funny!” John saw the anger in Marie, “My love, if we are going to make something out of this, Leonard will know that something is amiss and we don’t want that!”
“Well he is not like his dad! On this topic John, when are we going to tell Leonard who his dad is? I, as his grandma, want to know!” John and Annette were not prepared for this, “Well Marie, when I think he is right for the truth! Annette’s illness is also complicating things, so let it be for now, I will handle it when the time comes.” Marie was still upset and angry at the answer, “Well let me know when so I can get the cotton wool ready to wrap Leonard up! His heart will be broken and the betrayal from all of us will be too much to handle for our little boy.”
The rest of that year for Leonard was a time of adjustment to the teenage life. His voice started breaking and he sometimes sounded like a pig squealing in the slaughter house on his uncle’s farm. Annette was getting better and practiced her voice everyday so that she could sing in church. She had so much love to share with Leonard and Liza and for the first time in their lives, they where a family as it was meant to be. Sam came to visit them almost every day and although Grandpa John did not approve of this, he had a deal with Sam.
Leonard passed his standard 6 with ease and could not wait for standard 7 to start. This would be the year in which Leonard would lose himself and his way for a brief second and if he only knew what was ahead, he would have wished to stay in 1982 forever.
Sam decided to take the family for a visit to his new block of flats in Beaconsfield and then show off his plans for the old blocks of flats that were spread across Kimberley.
After the royal tour he took them out to dinner at the Horseshoe Motel where Judas, his right hand man, joined them for dinner. Judas now grownup, took a liking to Leonard immediately, “Hey boss, you like playing the sport?” Leonard laughed at his heavy accent, “Judas you speak funny!” Judas laughed, “Yes boss, it’s because I am a Swazi! My language is much different to English so it sounds funny. My tongue still forgets some words and gets twisted with the sounds!” “Well Judas I love sport! I play soccer, rugby, table tennis, basically anything with a ball! And you?” Judas looked impressed, “Yes boss I love thee soccer but my sport is running for very far! You should come with me so you can get fit for your sport and when you are big we can run the Comrades together.” Leonard was very impressed with this black man liking him so much, “Okay when do we start?” Judas looked at him while wiping his nose, “In a week or so boss, I have a bit of flu, so I am no good now, okay?”
Nobody even noticed the conversation between Leonard and Judas, because if they did, they would have taken Annette to the hospital for observation. Annette was telling Sam how she was going to sing in church that Sunday and that he should come with them.
Sunday morning Sam arrived with his big car and picked up everybody for church. Annette looked beautiful with a few drops of sweat on her brow and little pale in the face. “Annette you okay, you don’t look so good?” asked Sam. Annette looked at him and smiled, “I am okay Sam, just a bit of nerves. Mom and dad asked me as well and checked me out, so don’t worry!” The church started and Annette felt a little flustered but ready for her songs.
“Brothers and sisters after a long time out of singing and church we have the pleasure to hear Annette singing again. Her voice may have changed but I am glad to say that God gave her something special in place of her old voice! Let’s not waste time, Annette please come forward!” Pastor Pieter was extremely excited to call Annette, for him her story has come full circle and her testimony would help heal people with their broken hearts and lives.
“Good morning!” Annette greeted the congregation, “I decided to sing two songs this morning. My first song is ‘Till the storm passes over’ and my second song ‘The King is coming’. In my life, as most of you know, things went from good to bad very quickly and it took years of hard work by God, my mom, my dad, my daughter and my little boy to bring me to where I am today. The love my boy showed me was from God and the rest of the team kept me on the straight and narrow. I want to thank my God for healing my family and giving me back my son. And this is from my heart to God’s ear! Hope you enjoy it!”
The music started and Annette looked up at heaven and smiled, “God I know this is your time and I am ready! Just one more time to glorify You!” Her voice filled the church that morning with the sounds from heaven and people could feel how the clouds started to move away in their lives as the storms cleared. They could feel the presence of God filling the church and erupted into The King is coming, singing the praises of God with Annette. As Pastor Pieter led the church in spontaneous prayer, nobody noticed Annette collapsing on the steps as she walked down the pulpit. It was a good five minutes before Leonard realised his mom was not next to him.
He opened his eyes to peak and see where she was when he saw her on the floor, “Grandpa, Grandpa Mommy is on the floor!” He screamed so hard that the whole church went quiet. John opened his eyes and wanted to slap Leonard for his disrespect when he saw Annette on the ground, “Pastor Pieter you need to start praying, we have trouble!” Sam ran to the front and tried to wake Annette up. He felt her pulse and could hardly feel her heart beating. He scooped her up and ran to the car, “John we need to get to the hospital, NOW!” They arrived at the hospital just ten minutes after leaving the church. Sam ran into the hospital to get a nurse who could help Annette into the emergency room. Doctor Mustard was paged to come down from his standby rooms in the hospital to attend to the emergency and left Annette’s family waiting for answers.
Pastor Pieter looked at his congregation with tears in his eyes, “My dear brothers and sisters, please pray for Annette in this day. She has become a symbol of what has happened to our church and I pray that God will heal her in this day! Let us pray; Heavenly Father we bring Annette Botha to you in this day. Father we know she is sick but we pray that you give her back to us. Father please hear our cry and please be with her now! Hold her family close to your Father heart in this time of worry. Send your angels to protect Annette my God and may she be in the glow of your healing power today. Amen!”
Doctor Mustard came out of the emergency theatre wringing his theatre cap in his hands, “John, Marie I have bad news for you. Annette is critical with pneumonia. The infection has ravished her lungs. I don’t know how we have missed it a week ago with her health review, nor do I know how we are going to stop this infection. Her CD4 count has dropped below 100 and in my opinion she has at the most only a few hours to live. I would suggest you and the family make the most of your time with her and say your goodbyes. I am so sorry John!”
If the earth was only willing to open up and swallow the suffering and pain at that moment, things may have been more bearable, but it didn’t. Marie and John looked at one another, “How are we going to tell the kids?”John took Marie’s hand, “Marie you go to Annette, and I will handle Sam and the kids.” Marie ran to Intensive Care while John walked back to the waiting room, “Sam, I have bad news!” As the tears rand down his cheeks he continued, “Annette is extremely sick and the doc fears for her life! If you need to say goodbye, now is the time!”
Marie walked into the room with fear in her hart, “Hey baby girl! How are you feeling?” Annette opened her tired eyes, “Hey Mommy! I am so tired and this body of mine seems like it has had enough! I need to ask you for forgiveness mom!” The tears ran down Marie’s face, “Annette there is no need baby!” “No mom, I treated you like a dog! When Leonard was born I hated you for taking Leonard’s side but today I need to say thank you! Leonard has become a beautiful young man and the love he showed me was taught to him by you! Mom you became my life standard without even trying to change me and accepting me for whom I was. Mom no person deserves a mom like I had, because you are too good. You are an angel that was sent to me to protect me! You mom saved my life with your love and I want to ask you to forgive me for my attitude towards you and dad.”
Marie battled to be brave for her daughter, “Annette there is nothing to forgive because it was done many years ago. Baby girl your mom is so proud of you and you must remember I love you with a love that could only be given by God Himself.” Annette gave Marie a soft smile, “Thank you mommy. Please could you get Sam, I need to have a talk with him.”
Sam was shocked at the news, “You mean she is going to die? No it can’t be John! In our lives things were not always good, but this!” Sam left the room and ran up to Intensive Care where he was taken in by Marie to see Annette, “Annette baby you okay?” Annette smiled, “O Sam don’t be so dramatic! I am going to survive; I don’t plan on dying just yet!” Sam smiled, “Annette, you know and I know that is not true! John told me everything; you don’t have to pretend my girl!” Annette choked up and with her breath getting shorter she made Sam promise to look after Leonard and Liza, “Sam you know that Leonard and Liza have been adopted by my mom and dad. I decided to do that because you know how you get sometimes. Liza is your child but she will be okay with my parents and you, but Leonard will only have my parents when I die. I want you to promise me that you will look after them both if my mom and dad pass away. Promise me!” Sam could not understand why Annette made him promise to look after the misfit Leonard as well, but smiled, “Annette I promise, don’t worry baby they both will be fine.”
John sat down with Leonard and Liza as Sam walked off to Intensive Care, “Hey you two, you okay?” Leonard and Liza nodded, “Grandpa is Mommy going to be okay?” asked Leonard. John could hardly bear the pain, “My boy, you know that sometimes people get so sick that they die? Well the doctor said that your mommy is
very sick and that he does not know if she would survive the night. In short, if God does not help your mommy, she will be with Him shortly!” Liza started crying and Leonard pulled her under his arm while the tears ran down his face, “Grandpa, can we ask Jesus to help us? In the past when grandma and I prayed for mommy things would get better, please can we?” John had no voice to answer his boy and closed his eyes, “Heavenly Father it is me Leonard again. God you and I know one another for many years and you have always helped me. Please, please God help my mommy and heal her. We have just got to the point where she loves me for me. God you have helped my mom to see me, I am begging you Jesus to please save my mommy! Thank you that I know that you will help us again, Amen”
John could not breathe as he held his grandchildren in his arms, “Grandpa, can we see our mommy now?” asked Liza. “Yes princess let’s go, but remember mommy is very sick and full of plastic tubes so she will look a bit funny, okay? They put her medicine in the tubes and then it goes into her body to help her fight the germs that is making her sick.” Liza did not understand the explanation or how serious it was, all she wanted was to see her mommy. They arrived at the Intensive Care as Marie and Sam came walking out, “John, I think you need to hurry, Annette is fading fast! Sam and I will look after Leonard so you and Liza can see her first.” John walked in with Liza on his arm, “Hey baby girl it’s daddy! Annette, Annette! I have brought Liza in as well!” Annette breathed slowly and the wheezing of her chest told the story of pain and suffocation, “Hey daddy!” Annette wheezed, “I love you daddy remember that, okay? Please look after my babies!” Annette took Liza in her arms and kissed her on her forehead, “Liza my girl, I think mommy is going to Jesus one of these days and I want you to know that I love you my baby.” Liza looked at her mom all funny, not understanding where her mommy was going, “Mom when are you coming back? My birthday is only a few months away! Are you going to buy me a present when you are with Jesus, hey Mommy?”
Annette smiled, “No baby girl, you remember when we took your doggie to the doctor and the doctor said we had to put him to sleep?” “Yes Mommy! I was really sad but you said that he has gone to Jesus. So you are going to see Bobby dog! You said that he died mommy, are you going to die like Bobby dog as well mommy?” “Yes my baby, but you still can see me when you look up in the sky because people who die become stars in heaven to shine for Jesus. So when you miss me, baby, look up in the sky and always remember, Mommy loves you!” “How will I know it’s you mommy, there are lots and lots of stars?” “Well just look at the brightest star and you will see me wink at you, okay!” Liza was confused but smiled, “Okay Mommy! Grandpa, can I go to grandma, this place stinks!”
John took Liza to Marie, “Leonard your turn now.” Leonard walked into Annette’s room, “Mom you better now?” Annette’s heart monitor was beeping very slowly, “Hallo my boy! Leonard you are old enough to understand that this is time to say goodbye my boy. I need you to be strong and listen to me because I don’t know how much longer I have!” Annette coughed as the blood from her longs came spewing out, “Leonard for years I have hated you and treated you like a worthless dog, but every time you came back my boy and licked my feet, so to call, for love. It took years for me to see you for whom you are my boy and I never could understand why you loved me so much after everything I did to you?” Leonard’s lip began to quiver, “Mom I loved you from when I could remember. I was in your tummy still when I knew you were my mommy and I loved you with all my heart. I was part of you mom! I could not understand why you hated me so much, but you cannot stop loving someone if that love is a gift from God!” Annette smiled with tears in her eyes, “You know Leonard, I hated you because your dad did things to me that I held against you for so many years.”
“What did my dad do to you mom?” John felt his heart jump in his chest, “Annette, you think this is wise?” Annette looked at her dad, “Yes daddy! I need to make peace with Leonard, Squeal and God. The letter you have dad, it’s time, okay?” John nodded, “Mom what letter? Squeal who is that? Mommy?” you could hear the anguish in Leonards voice, “Squeal was your daddy my boy. He was the outcast of Kimberley but he was just a stupid boy, just wanting to fit in. The letter will explain most of the story to you and if you have questions it will be granddad’s job to fill in the blank spaces for you.”
“Annette are you sure my baby?” asked John for the second time with the pain visible in his face. “Dad you need to promise me to tell Leonard the truth, please!” John looked flustered, “Okay baby I will, but I don’t know if this is the right decision. I am going out for a minute or two, okay?” Annette smiled and waved a kiss to her dad, “Leonard I need to do two things before I go. I need to thank you my boy for your love, because it was that love you had for me that brought me peace and back to God. The second thing is, if you ever meet this guy Lucifer in your dreams or in person, run away my boy, run away as far as you can! He is a liar and a thief and it is because of him making promises and keeping to deals his way that we are where we are today. The only problem is that the deals never seem to work out as you thought it would. He caught your dad like that and me. Promise me my boy!”
Leonard smiled at Annette, “Mom I have met him a long, long time ago and he still visits me sometimes. I have learned that lesson well and I promise you mom, I will not run away, but I will fight him every step of the way, he will pay for you and dad! Now, that I can promise you mom!” Annette smiled, “Good...” she gasped for air as her heart monitor started going haywire, “Leonard you should see this my boy! It’s beautiful! I can smell the flowers and the grass is so soft! Leonard the sun is so warm and here comes Jesus my boy. He has come to fetch me! I can sing again Leonard, tell Grandpa I am waiting for you all and will pray for all of you! Leonard remember, I LOVE YOU...!”
The heart monitor beeped slower and slower as if it knew that death was in the room and with a last gasp Annette opened her eyes, “Here I am Jesus, I am ready to go home! Please look after my family, Amen!” Annette’s eyes closed as she blew out her last breath and her body became still. The heart monitor went in to a dull beep, “Mommy don’t leave me!” screamed Leonard, “I don’t want to be alone! Please mommy come back, I love you! Please Jesus give me my mommy back! Please God! I will be a good boy! Please! I will do anything for you, even die in place of my mommy just bring her back! Please Mommy I am begging you, please come back! I love you Mommy, I LOVE YOU....!”
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