What Hurts The Most

  Chapter Two

  After I was presented with the letter, everything else went by so fast. The funeral arrangements were made the next day and before I knew it, I was being driven to the local airport to watch as Nick’s body was delivered. The far eastern port was closed for this reason. I was standing in a line with some of my family, as well as Nick’s, and some other Army officials. As the plane landed, a line of soldiers marched in front of the casket. They all had an indifferent expression on their face as they stopped in front of me. “Ms. Woods, I am required to ask you this but it’s your choice. If you would like to see his body before he is transported to the funeral home, you may. We can give you a few minutes alone if you would like. But, I would like to warn you that the site of him is indeed gruesome.” General Wilson whispers.

  “How gruesome, sir?” I ask with my head down. The look in his eyes told me all I needed to know. “No, thank you.” I added.

  He turns to face the soldiers. “Proceed.” He says, sternly. Some people may think that was selfish of me, but if I saw him in whatever shape he was in now, that’s all I would remember of him. And I didn’t want that…

  We follow as he’s loaded into a hearse. As I watch, trying to control my emotions, the General appears again. “Ma’am, I have been informed that someone would like to speak with you. You do not under any circumstances have to accept, but I think it would ease your mind a bit.”

  “Who is it?”

  “Lieutenant Logan Cook. He was there when your Fiancé was killed. He can explain to you what happened a lot better than I can.”

  I didn’t hesitate. “I’d like to speak with him.”

  “Very well. Follow me.” He adds as we walk around the airport and into a security office. “I’ll be standing right here. When you want to leave, just let me know.” I nod in response and walk into the room. There’s a man sitting alone at a table. He looks up and gives me a regretful smile. He stands to shake my hand. He seemed to be about six foot two, brown hair, blue eyes, and very well built.

  “Ms. Woods, Lieutenant Logan Cook. Pleasure to meet you, I just wish it was of better circumstances.” He says as we sit down, across from each other.

  “As do I.” I clear my throat. “The General informed me that you have some information that you would like to share with me?”

  He nods. “Yes, ma’am. I’m not sure how much you know about the Army and its ranks, but I’m a Lieutenant and at the time that Nick was killed, I was in charge. We had been radioed late that night, that some of our most wanted criminals had been located only about a mile from our camp. We were the closest at the time and it was our job to get them in custody. When we approached the building that they were said to be at, we investigated and found our suspects had innocent children as their hostages. While we were coming up with a game plan, we watched as the building went up in flames. My team and I made a quick decision to save the kids. As we did. Every one of them escaped unharmed.”

  He takes a ragged breath before continuing as I prepare myself for what is to come. “When I was accounting for my team, Nick was missing. I went back into the building along with another soldier and found him clutching a little girl. He told me to get the kid out and I did. He was trapped underneath a beam and it took four of us to get him out. When we ran out of the building, it collapsed and all of our suspects were killed. When I was checking Nick for injuries, I noticed that he was having a lot of trouble breathing and he had been shot twice. Once in the back of his leg and once in his lower chest, which went directly through his left lung. He had also been stabbed multiple times in a struggle to save the child. He knew he was dying and he told me a few things to say to you.”

  “Were you two friends?” I ask, struggling to get my scrambled brain together.

  “Very much so. I met him the day that he started boot camp. He was a bit nervous but he was really excited, which is what kind of drew me to him. I wanted him on my team and I got him. We talked all the time and honestly, all I can remember talking about was you. He told me about when he first met you and your first date. Then when he was sent home for a little while, a few months ago, he talked to me right before he left. He told me that he was finally going to ask you to marry him. I told him to go for it and the night you said yes, he called and told me. He loved you very much, which brings me to this…” He pauses and reaches down in his pocket. “Usually, you receive this at the funeral and the General gives it to you, but he asked me first and I’m honoring his wishes.” He hands me his dog tags then a picture of us.

  “He carried that around with him everywhere he went. He slept with it, talked to it, and he showed every soldier in our unit at least a dozen times. He wanted you to have it.”

  I took a deep breath as he finishes.

  “I know this is a lot for you and I want you to know that if you ever need anything or just want to talk, I’m here. All you got to do is tell the General. I’ll be there in a heartbeat. Just know that Nick died fighting for his country… Fighting for you and he died a hero.”

  “Thank you, Lieutenant,” I whisper as I stood up and exited the room.

  “Ready?” General Wilson asks.

  I nod as we leave the airport. I sat in the back of the SUV wondering why? Why did he have to die? Why couldn’t it be someone else? I lowered my head at the thought of it. I was being selfish. It could have been anyone out there and it was Nick… My Nick.