Smash Into You

  "I'm OK," I told her. "I'm sorry about...everything. And that." I pointed to her neck.

  The small smile had more than one meaning. It had my inner guy perking to attention. "Girls don't generally complain about beard burn, do they? Isn't it supposed to be a way for guys to mark girls, claim them, be all romantic in a Neanderthal kinda way, like hickies?"

  I arched an eyebrow at her. Oh, is that right. She blushed, furiously and adorably, and backtracked.

  "I didn't mean you were trying to mark me, I just meant you didn't have to apologize."

  I couldn't help myself. I leaned in, putting my hand on the wall behind her head. "How many hickies have you had?"

  She licked her bottom lip. Again. "None," she breathed. She put a hand on my chest to keep me from coming closer.

  I pursed my lips in approval. "That's a good answer."

  "Why do you care?" she asked. It wasn't a demand that she know, it was more like she was genuinely interested. Why did I?

  I enjoyed her being that close for a few more seconds before leaning back. "Thanks for taking care of me last night. And for fixing my bandage. I know I was an ass, I'm sorry. I think I owe you some breakfast." I took her hand and towed her to the room. I sat down and tied my boots. When I looked up, she was still standing there, looking a little stunned. "Get your shoes on, sweetheart."

  She scoffed, but still smiled as she pulled them on and gathered all our things from the bed. We left in a hurry and I drove us to a place that looked cheap enough for some eggs and bacon.

  I couldn't eat and just the smell of bacon made my stomach turn, but I had to let Marley get some food in her. As the sweet, dark coffee made its way down my throat, I stared out the window. Even after what I'd done last night, she still took care of me. Even now, she wasn't angry. I didn't know why. I'd had plenty of female scorn come my way, I was used to it, but she seemed reflective more than mad about everything. I was reflecting on my own.

  I realized that Marley reminded me of my mother. Not like that, but in the way that they both sacrificed anything and everything for what needed to be done.

  She was eating her fruit by hand again, the fork not leaving the table once. Even her French toast she tore into strips and dipped in the syrup. I was so curious about it, but would never ask. I'd never get a chance to where it wouldn't be awkward because I'd never get to know her as much as I wanted to.

  The waitress dropped the check at the table wordlessly. I picked it up and pulled my wallet out. All I had left was nine twenties and the bill was fourteen dollars. That didn't leave much left over for lodging and food for later. I cursed myself for my bender that night. It had only been a twenty-five dollar bender, but that was still money that we no longer had.

  Marley must have seen my face because she asked, "What's the matter?"

  "Just running low on funds," I answered, fully expecting her to throw last night in my face. She didn't.

  "I wish I could contribute, but all I have left is seven dollars in tips from that night. My shift had just started," she reasoned, like it was all her fault.

  "It's not your fault. We'll figure something out. I have five hundred dollars at my apartment. If I knew we could go back and get it..."

  "I don't think that's a good idea," she supplied quickly.

  "Me either." I nodded to the waitress to let her know I was ready. "We don't have much left and it's not going to get us very far. We'll have to start pinching pennies."

  She nodded while the waitress took the check. We got in the truck and started down the road again, my shoulder aching like a mother, and my mind wondering what the hell we were going to do.

  SIX

  "Bastard. Mother fan-freaking-tastic. Crap! Crap! Crap! Bastard crap!"

  Marley had her mouth covered with her fingers, no doubt disgusted by my outburst. We'd only made it about a hundred and some change down the road before the front driver's side tire blew. I was holding in four-letter words for her benefit, but I was so pissed.

  The giggle made me turn. She wasn't horrified; she was laughing at me! "What the hell is so funny?"

  "Bastard crap," she said with a grin and giggled again. "I know that whatever is wrong is obviously not good, but...bastard crap?"

  I sighed and leaned my head back on the seat, the smile breaking free on my lips. "Oh, boy, you're gonna be trouble, aren't you?" I turned my head on the seat. She just smiled and shrugged one shoulder. One very cute, adorable, sexy shoulder. I shook my head. "All right, I'm going to change the tire. Just sit tight, all right?"

  I got out and reached over the truck bed to get the spare...but it was gone. My eyes shot back and forth like it was just hiding and I had somehow missed it. I sighed. Dang, someone had ripped me off. She got out and looked at me expectantly over the truck. "What's wrong?"

  "Someone stole the spare."

  Her lips parted in surprise. "Oh, no."

  "Yeah," I agreed.

  "What are we gonna do?"

  "Well," I said slowly, raking my hair back. "I'll have to call a tow truck, I guess."

  "How much will that be?" she said worriedly.

  "Too much," I groaned. I reached in between the seats and hoped that my phone still had some battery left. It was in the red and my charger was at my apartment. I called and explained everything to the guy. He said he had some used tires that I could purchase from him, so we waited in the truck. I played with the radio and then she played with the radio, changing it and laughing when I picked something she didn't like. We started talking about school, majors, jobs, all the places we'd lived. She had moved around a lot, too, but mostly against her will unfortunately from foster home to foster home.

  "I've been to fifty different schools, at least. Tons of high schools. Those were the worst to change from one to another. I was always the new kid, never got close to anyone, never had friends because I'd just be leaving again soon," I explained, flashes of schools and nameless faces crossed my mind. It was all a blur.

  Her smile changed. "Lots of schools I bet, huh?"

  My brow creased in confusion at her mood change. "Yeah. What's wrong?"

  "Just…thinking."

  Forty-five minutes after my call, a beat-up, red tow truck pulled in behind me. I didn't get a chance to ask her what was wrong before we were climbing into the tow truck and making our way into town. It was a good twenty miles out and when we got there, he said it would be about an hour before he got it all fixed. So, we found a fast food burger place and sat in the back to eat our cheap cheeseburgers.

  She told me about her favorite foster home. It was an older lady who would pick her up from school in her wheelchair. They'd walk home together like that every single day. When the state found out the lady could barely walk any longer, they didn't allow her to foster kids anymore and sent Marley to a new home. I saw it all over her face that that old lady was the only place she'd ever been that gave a damn about her. She didn't go into specifics, but I knew she'd been mistreated.

  She deserved a better life than one stuck with me.

  Whatever town we reached by nightfall was where I planned to drop her off. So after we got the truck back and paid him two thirds of our money for the tow and used tire, we trekked on 'til dark. We were a few hundred miles away from where Biloxi had found me. Hopefully, there would be something I could come up with here for her. I could be pretty crafty when forced.

  We hadn't eaten anything since that brunch and after fifty in gas, which we were back to empty already, there was only ten dollars left. So I pulled into the little grocery store, got out, and waited for her to join me because I knew she would. She hopped out and walked beside me inside the harshly lit store. I grabbed a hand basket and went straight for the poor-boy-aisle. I thought about how much money I had left and started putting cans of Vienna sausage in the basket, then a few cans of potted meat and tuna just to mix things up. I grabbed of box of store brand crackers on the way to the register and couldn't believe I hadn't heard one eew or anything from Marley. r />
  I paid. This stuff would last us two days, maybe three, but we only had one dollar and thirty-seven cents left, and no hotel money. We'd be roughing it from now on.

  I drove us around until I found an old, abandoned gas station and parked us in the back, killing the engine. I opened the bag and took out two cans of Vienna, handing one to her.

  "Thanks," she said and popped the top.

  "A girl willingly eating Vienna. Now I've seen everything," I joked.

  She put one in her mouth and kinda smiled. "It's basically a food group for me."

  My smile fell. Crap, I was an idiot. She was living in her car and had said she didn't have much money left after school for food... I shook my head. "Sorry. I forgot that..."

  "It's all right." She had devoured her can before I even started mine. "So we're sleeping in the truck, huh?"

  "Have to."

  She gave a wry grin. "Home sweet home."

  "I wish I had never met you."

  She stared, unblinking. "What?" she whispered.

  "If I had never met you, you wouldn't be eating Vienna sausage while sleeping in my truck."

  She laughed a little. "No, I'd be eating Vienna while sleeping in mine."

  I felt my eyes bulge. Good Lord, I was such an idiot! If I put my foot in my mouth one more time, I'd never need to eat again. "I have a thing with you about putting my foot in my mouth."

  She reached over and patted my arm. "It's all right, tiger." She grinned. "I forgive you. I'm sure you don't know many people who are home challenged."

  "Home challenged," I laughed. "Wow, I've reduced you to making up new phrases just to deal with my stupidity."

  "You're not stupid." She sank down further in the seat and put her feet on the dash. She'd taken her shoes off at some point. "So, what's the plan tomorrow?"

  I didn't want to talk about it now; I wanted to wait until tomorrow because I knew she'd be upset, but it couldn't be helped. "Well...I think we'll stay here for a bit. Try to get some cash in our hands."

  "And how do you expect to do that?"

  "I have my ways," I said coyly.

  She laughed silently and then said, "I have no doubt in that." I was glad the dark hid my smug grin. "So…do you think those lights will stay on all night?" She looked out the windshield at the street light.

  "Probably. Why?"

  "I just have a thing about the dark," she said, her voice small. "So...goodnight, then."

  "Night, Marley."

  She curled up against the door and window. She fidgeted with her pocket and wiped something on her nose. I squinted in confusion for a second, but she seemed normal. I almost thought that she...no. She wouldn't. Besides, we had no money. Where would she get drugs from?

  I leaned my head back and was content to sleep in any position, but she kept wrestling with her movements. I realized she probably usually slept in her car's backseat and my old beat-up leather seat wasn't very comfy. So I pulled her by the arm to lay against my side. She didn't protest a lick, which meant she was super tired. Or at least I assumed that's what it meant. It was colder at night and I hoped she wouldn't be too cold.

  When she finally went to sleep, I felt like I could, too.

  She woke first and woke me up in the process. She must've been wiping slobber off her lip because she hid her face from me as she fixed something. It made me want to chuckle. "Breakfast?"

  She reached and held up a can of tuna. "Of champions."

  I laughed out loud at that. "You got it."

  "So what's your big idea for today?" she asked while picking up bites of tuna from the can by pinching it with her fingers.

  "I'll show you. Eat up."

  Later, as we drove over to the docks and got out, I searched for my target.

  "Great, now I'm gonna smell fishy all day from that tuna," she complained.

  "No, not from the tuna," I told her playfully. I pointed to the big boat just coming in. "But you will from that."

  "What is that?"

  "That's our meal ticket. And hotel ticket if we play our cards right."

  She shook her head skeptically. "I've never had a good poker face, Jude. Will we need to lie?"

  "Not a lick. This is all brute force and skill." I started to walk toward them, but looked back at her and grinned. "And puppy dog eyes, of course."

  She scrambled to catch up. "You're making puppy dog eyes?"

  "You are, sweetheart. We need these men to let us work for them for the day. I used to live this way. Find odd jobs, people who just needed something done for a day or two and it was always enough to get me by. So work your magic."

  "I'm not a magician." She looked like she was about to throw up. "I'm not good at this kinda thing."

  "Work the fish dock often, do you?"

  She gave me a dull look. "You are becoming impossible. Why can't you just do it?"

  "All right." I agreed because I knew she'd see.

  "Excuse me," I called and leaned on the dock rope. "Need any help for the day?"

  "Nah, not today, kid."

  I looked back at Marley in a See? manor. I whispered, "Showtime."

  She was agitated, but it probably worked in our favor. "Excuse me. I'm sorry." They both looked over in annoyance, but I saw the softness come over them. It was hilarious how gullible men were. Freaking hilarious. "Look, we haven't had a meal in a day. We slept in our truck last night and don't know what we're going to do tonight either. We're not looking for a handout, just to work for what we earn. Do you have anything we can do for some extra cash?"

  And puppy dog eyes ensued. Bingo.

  "Aw, come on, Mike," one of the guys said to the other.

  He sighed, but smiled at her. Not me, her. "All right, honey. Hope you're ready to work."

  Honey? I felt my scowl.

  "We are," she assured and took my arm, towing me as she followed them down the dock.

  They had us weighing fish, then cutting off the heads before packing them, and measuring crabs. Not once did Marley act disgusted or grossed out. She never complained, never whined. That girl worked her adorable butt off. The sun was starting to beat down on us, even though it was fall. The ache in my shoulder was starting to feel different and not in a good way. It felt deep, all the way to my bones. I tossed my wife beater off to give it some air, figuring the heat from the sun might help. It didn't, but I had to keep working so we'd get our loot for our day of work.

  They even gave us a ham sandwich at lunchtime before putting us right back to work. She started to hum as we boxed up the fish and labeled them before throwing them on the ice truck. It was fascinating, but I tried not to stare at her. I had already broken several of my rules with her and needed to remember that the end goal was to get her to leave.

  We worked all day and at almost sundown, they gave us a hundred and fifty dollars in cash to split. Not a gold mine in the least, but it would mean we'd eat real food tomorrow. We thanked them for their help. As we walked back to the truck, I started to suggest we sleep in it again to save money, but we both reeked of fish. No way out of it. We had to get a hotel and shower or no one would hire us tomorrow for sure.

  This room was better than the last if you discounted the fact that the clerk looked like the guy from Psycho. Marley bolted in the room and squealed, "Dibs on the shower!"

  I chuckled and wondered about dinner. We really should stick to the Vienna, but you couldn't eat that non-stop. We worked hard today and I really didn't want to go out anyway. My stomach was presently trying to eat itself.

  I searched for a phone book, groaning as I went from the ache making its way from my shoulder down my arm, and found a coupon in the yellow pages for a pizza place, so I tore it out and called. They said they'd be there in thirty minutes or it was free. I begged for them to take longer than that. Free pizza couldn't hurt right now.

  She was out of the shower in five minutes flat and came out. My heart jammed itself in my throat. She held her hand up to stop my protest. As if I'd protest her naked in a t
owel. "We have to wash our clothes, Jude. They smelled fishy."

  Dang. We ran out of money before we could get to the Goodwill to buy some used ones. "Right. No problem."

  She crawled under the covers carefully, pulling the comforter up to her neck. So daggum adorable.... The universe hated me. The guy said there was only one-bed rooms left and now I had to sleep next to her with nothing but towels on.

  "I ordered pizza. It was really cheap."

  She sighed in relief. "Good. I was hoping we wouldn't eat canned bits-n-pieces tonight. I'm starving."

  I laughed slightly as I went to grab a quick shower. I wanted to be out before the pizza guy came. I scrubbed and scrubbed, but tried not to mess with my shoulder. It was hurting something awful and had begun to pulse. I didn't know what to do for it. So I used the soap to wash my clothes in the sink as best I could and hung them on the towel rack with Marley's. Hopefully, they'd be dry in the morning.

  I wrapped the towel around my hips and opened the door slowly. Marley was huddled under the covers, the TV on the Home Improvement channel, and she wouldn't look at me. I even walked in front of the TV to get to my side of the bed, but her eyes never left it. Like she was forcing them to stay.

  Then, like an idiot, I wondered if she'd ever been with a guy before. She said she'd never had a hickie, but that didn't mean anything. I wanted to kick myself for hoping that she hadn't. Why did the guy in me want to keep this girl when my rational side knew this was a bad idea?

  I leaned my head back against the headboard and shifted so my shoulder wasn't pressing on it, too. She finally looked at me. "Oh, no. Your shoulder hurting you?"

  "Yes," I answered, my eyes closed.

  "I have the aspirin here." She pushed back the covers and went to the plastic bag that held all we had left in the world and got it, shaking four of the pills into her hand. Then she gave me a glass of water from the bathroom. "Here. I'll clean it again for you later."

  "Thanks." I downed them and leaned back again, trying not to go to sleep before the pizza arrived. When the knock sounded, I held my hand up letting her know I'd get it. I took fifteen dollars, opened the door, took the two large pizzas from him, and shoved the money at him. "Keep the change."