For the Win

  "What was that about?" I asked.

  Her mouth quirked. "I told you...sexual frustration."

  "And did that help?"

  A knowing smile. "It helped you, didn't it?"

  I sighed and scrubbed a hand across my face, then made my way back to the desk and sank into my seat, ready to continue the conversation. Before I could figure out what to say, there was a knock at the door and it opened. Daddy Dearest poked his head in.

  Holy Christ. If he'd tried that door five minutes before, it would have been locked and the whole situation would have been extremely suspicious. Had he been able to open the door, he would have found his daughter kneeling in front of me with my cock in her mouth. I went pale and April looked startled.

  "April, I'm out for the night. I just wanted to say goodbye. I'll see you down at our house for the weekend? Sarah and Daniel are really excited."

  She took a deep breath and let it go, holding her dad's gaze for a long moment before nodding. "Yeah. Uh, sure."

  Minutes after he was gone, there was silence between us. I tried to focus on my task at hand while she seemed to be engrossed in her own work. All of a sudden, she burst out laughing.

  And I couldn't help it--I started to laugh, too.

  When Adam came through the door to say he was locking up and sending everyone home, we were still cracking up and he stared at us like we were insane.

  "Don't mind us. We're just giddy with exhaustion," she said.

  Adam frowned. "Ohhkay. All the more reason to go home and go to bed."

  I mock saluted him and he returned with a salute of his own, of the middle finger variety.

  "Your cousin's going to be happy you're getting home at a decent hour." April gave me a strange look. She didn't know about the Adam-Mia cousin connection. I didn't bother to explain.

  "Die in a fire," he replied.

  After closing up shop, I walked out with the group while humming the tune to "Dueling Banjos." At least Mia thought it was amusing. The boss, not so much.

  ***

  We had four days until the IPO roadshow began. It would be two weeks of whirlwind visits to major cities across the country, presenting our case to the big bankers and investment companies for their backing. In a mere fifteen days, we were going to take Draco Multimedia Entertainment (under the New York Stock Exchange symbol, DME) to the market, and we needed them in our corner when it came time to ring the bell.

  That didn't mean I kept my hands off of April, though. The BJ in my office re-opened a sexual Pandora's box that could not be closed, even if we'd wanted to.

  The next day, just before lunch, April brought me some reports to glance through. She stood a little too close and smelled a little too good. I looked at the mess on my desk and sighed at the thought of all the work I had to do. She waited for me to say something, and I muttered about how annoyed I was that Charles was over at her desk every five minutes.

  "Hmm. You're not...jealous, are you?"

  I lifted my brow. "No. I just don't like how he's distracting you from your work."

  "I'm getting my work done. But if you want, I'll tell him that you told me to tell him to stay away."

  "I didn't tell you to tell him that."

  She leaned against my desk, arms folded. "You seem a little frustrated, Mr. Fawkes. Can I help you with that?"

  I clenched my jaw and scowled at her. She reached into her pocket, pulled something out and bent forward, stuffing it into my shirt pocket. "My lunch hour starts at one, and I might be hanging out in that ladies' room off the warehouse that no one ever uses..."

  With that, she straightened, pivoted and walked out, my eyes fastened to her ass like glue. When she sat at her desk, she tapped her chest to indicate I should look in my pocket. I did...and wished I hadn't.

  That foil wrapper represented everything I shouldn't do but probably would.

  I spent my lunch hour considering the possibility of an ice-cold shower in my private bathroom. At one, my phone chimed with a new text. I knew who it was from. I glanced up at her desk anyway and saw that she was, in fact, gone.

  Come find me.

  That was all it took. I was hard as a rock--again. Goddamn it. I had work to do. A lot of work to do. But I wanted her so badly it hurt.

  I found her waiting by the door to the restroom in question. Without a word, we went inside and I spent the next half hour spreading her against the wall and having my way with her.

  The ensuing days until I left town were like that. We'd find some place private and knock boots, sometimes twice a day, sometimes in my office when we were able. There was rarely any discussion involved, but the thrill of possibly getting caught was enough to get both our motors revved, much like our little outdoor adventure at the provincial park in Canada.

  The night before I departed to start the roadshow, I actually left work early. I'd be flying to the East Coast and working my way back west, sometimes meeting Adam in the cities where more of the bankers were located. I'd be attending all the presentations; he'd be there for the biggest and most important ones.

  April brought me dinner and she was my dessert. We still didn't talk about what all the screwing meant--or what it would mean once the company went public and David was voted in as chairman of the board.

  But regardless whether we discussed what would or wouldn't happen, I was beginning to realize that it was going to be a long two weeks without her.

  And it was. But not in the way I'd expected.

  It quickly became obvious that she was following my itinerary, starting each day with a text message. Those messages soon became the highlight of my day.

  Her: How's Boston treating you?

  Me: Not as good as you do.

  Her: I'm sure you have some old sexts from former, ahem, "friends" to get you by.

  Me: How 'bout some new ones from you?

  Her: Hi, how is Chicago?

  Me: It sucks. I like my own bed.

  Her: I like your bed, too. Preferably with you in it.

  Me: Weiss, YABI (Our adopted acronym for "You are being inappropriate.")

  Her: Dallas! Woo hoo. Ready for some line dancing?

  Me: I was born ready--and horny.

  Her: You were born inappropriate.

  Her: San Francisco...you're getting warmer.

  Me: I'm already hot.

  Her: Fawkes, YABI

  Me: Of course. And you love it.

  Throughout the course of the roadshow, I was hit on a few times by some of the hot underwriters, but to my surprise, I wasn't interested. They didn't tempt me at all. I found myself thinking a lot about April instead, wondering what she was doing. Nonetheless, I fought the urge daily to hit the call button on my phone.

  Finally, we emerged triumphant. Friday afternoon, just after close of business in New York, Adam and I touched down at John Wayne airport from Seattle. I got the call from our investment banker that the company had been valued at 8.3 billion USD. Our stock was going to open for a cool thirty-five dollars a share the following Monday morning, and we'd be on the floor of the stock exchange to ring the opening bell. It was going to be a feeding frenzy. And it was also going to be the realization of a long-awaited dream.

  Adam and I stood by the baggage carousel high-fiving each other after I gave him the news. He immediately pulled out his phone and called Mia to share it with her. And I realized that the first person I wanted to tell was April...

  I pulled out my phone and started keying in a text.

  Market cap 8.3 bil. $35/share. Keep it quiet for now.

  She replied less than a minute later.

  Her: OMG! So happy for you. Deleting your text msg now.

  Me: Our driver's on the way, right?

  Her: He should already be there.

  "Who are you texting?" Adam asked once he hung up with Mia.

  "Just making sure our ride is here. I get irritated when I have to wait," I half-lied.

  "We've got the company party tomorrow afternoon. We'll keep it quiet
until then and announce when we're all together."

  "Sure. You going to tell David Weiss ahead of time?"

  "Of course. He gets the next phone call."

  "How did Mia take the news that her cousin-slash-fiance is a billionaire now?"

  "She wasn't very surprised. Happy for me, and all that."

  "Of course she's happy for you. She gets half of it in the divorce." I grinned but didn't bother saying "JK"--he already knew I was joking.

  He shook his head with a smile as he walked from the baggage area out to the curb. "I don't even know why I tell you anything."

  "I know all about the legal particulars. For instance, it's legal to marry your first cousin in California."

  "Good to know." Adam approached our usual driver, who was already waiting with the trunk open. He tossed his bag in the back, and I came around and did the same. "Ah c'mon, you're no fun when you aren't telling me to fuck off."

  All he did was shoot me a knowing grin. Killjoy.

  On the way home, I pulled out my phone to check it and found myself sending April another text.

  Stay over with me tonight.

  She didn't reply for a long time. In fact, the next text I received from her was sent over two hours later.

  Sorry, was in the middle of driving to La Jolla. Visiting my Dad's tonight for little sis's b-day. We'll be coming to the party together. I'll see you then.

  I couldn't believe the disappointment I felt by that. I wanted to see her. Sure, I wanted to rub myself all over her luscious body, but I also wanted to talk with her, maybe tease her a bit, smell her hair. I'd just assumed she'd be at my beck and call. And after two weeks of no sex, I wanted her at my beck and call, damn it.

  ***

  To burn off some of the sexual frustration, I went out on dawn patrol to catch the waves early the next morning. Conditions were clean, and I caught some awesome A-frame, reef-breaking waves with hardly a soul out there. As it was October, the water was getting cold, so I wore my wetsuit. But after an hour or so, I got bored and headed back in. Then I checked my phone a few times, to see if maybe she'd sent a text. Nothing.

  And really, what the hell was happening to me that it mattered so much?

  That afternoon, there was a company pool party to celebrate the next step in our quest for gaming market domination. We'd rented out part of an obscenely expensive country club in South County for poolside cocktails and appetizers.

  The officers and tentative board members met early for a private luncheon. David Weiss sat between Adam and me at the big round table, and I couldn't help scanning the surrounding area for his daughter. I knew she'd come up with him, but I wasn't supposed to know that and I didn't want to be so obvious as to ask.

  He was very interested to hear about the details of the road show and we filled him in accordingly. Finally, to my relief, Adam asked him about his daughter.

  "Oh, she's here. She's running around with some of your assistants, helping with the details of the company party."

  It now became my mission to spot her without looking like I was trying to spot her. It was stupid, really. I could just text her. But she hadn't texted me.

  And what was all this stupid shit, anyway? I'd been out of high school almost a decade. Next, I'd be wondering if she'd kiss me under the bleachers at the homecoming dance. Fuck it. I was doing a pretty miserable job of staying uninvolved while being involved in whatever the hell this was. Co-workers with benefits? Very, very nice benefits.

  After lunch, we went into dressing rooms and changed for the party. Though it was fall, it was still warm enough for a pool party. Only in Southern California, I thought, shaking my head.

  Fifteen minutes into the party, I caught sight of her on the other side of the pool, speaking with a group of other interns. One of them was that little brat, Cari, who had tried to blackmail her weeks ago. They appeared to be on amicable terms now.

  April was wearing a modest, black, one-piece swimsuit trimmed in bright blue. It had a high back, probably to hide the damning tattoo, which everyone here would recognize in an instant.

  When she finally looked my way, I caught her eye. She sent me a tentative smile. Something lit up inside me and I smiled.

  I shot a meaningful glance at the building, indicating I wanted to meet her there. She frowned and looked away. What the hell was up? Now I was pretty sure that she was purposely avoiding me, and that didn't sit well. I thought about sending her a text message, but she'd likely ignore that too.

  I skirted the pool and went directly to her and her little flock. She looked up, eyes widening. "Weiss, can I speak with you for a minute, please? I have a couple questions."

  "Sure," she mumbled, looking back down. I stepped away while she excused herself, and then she followed me up the steps and toward the building, walking slower the closer we got. I held open the door for her, but she hesitated.

  "What did you need to talk to me about?"

  I glanced at the door. "Inside."

  She took a breath and then let it go. Once inside, I found an empty cabana dressing room and pulled her in with me. Just as she was about to talk, I turned, holding her face in between my hands, and kissed her the way I'd wanted to every night I'd been gone. She responded as if I was breathing new life into her, her body rising up against me, her fingers clutching at the t-shirt I wore with my swim trunks. Her mouth opened for more, as if she'd been starving, and, to be honest, her reaction just made me even hungrier for her.

  Minutes later when I pulled back, she was flushed and breathless. The only sound in the silence between us was that of our heavy breathing. As I was bending in for more, she pulled away. "Did you actually have a question or were you pulling me in here to kiss me?"

  "Is there a problem with that?"

  She took a deep breath and let it go, her eyes hardening. Apparently, there was a problem with that.

  "I'll only be working for you for two more weeks. I want something real between us--not this sneaking around."

  I grinned. "I thought you liked sneaking around." I punctuated that statement with another heated kiss, my tongue sweeping into her hot, delicious mouth. Then I reached around and grabbed her ass, pulling her flush against me.

  She put her hands on my chest. "Jordan," she said against my lips.

  "Mmm...I missed you."

  She tilted her head away, looking up at me, perplexed. "You did?"

  I frowned. "Why does that surprise you?"

  She shook her head. "Because you're confusing me. I don't know what this is. Is this just about sex or is it more?"

  I clenched my jaw and looked away. "It can't be more than this. You know why. I've already told you."

  "You aren't willing to take a chance on me--on us."

  "So I'm supposed to tell your Dad that we aren't really dating, we're just hooking up? Because I don't do relationships--not real, serious relationships. So I'll tell him I'm just fucking his daughter. How well will that go over?"

  She swallowed. "Jordan..."

  "What? Can it be more than that? No, no it can't."

  Her lip trembled. "Well, it's more for me, because...because I'm in love with you."

  At first I wasn't quite sure I'd heard her right. Then, as understanding dawned, my first reaction was to deny, deny, deny. This wasn't what she thought it was. It couldn't be that. I couldn't breathe. My chest felt tight and there wasn't enough air in this little dressing room. She watched my reaction closely.

  The last time a woman had said those words to me, I'd asked her to marry me and then she'd fucked some other guy. I couldn't go there again. I wouldn't go there again. Not now, maybe not ever.

  I closed my eyes, scrubbing a hand over my face.

  Chapter 25

  April

  I watched Jordan blanch as he reacted to my declaration of love. He actually looked like he might pass out. Not the response I'd always imagined when telling a guy I loved him. And I didn't say the words lightly. In fact, I'd never said those words to any other
man--not even Gunnar. But I'd never felt like this for any other man. I could admit all that to him now, but I knew he didn't want to hear it. His features were shuttering, like a house boarding up in preparation for a hurricane.

  "I'm not expecting anything more from you than to just give this a chance," I said into the silence, hating how my voice trembled.

  He looked away. "What does that mean exactly?"

  Well, this was hopeful. At least he wanted to hear me out. "That...that we date like normal people when I leave Draco."

  "I don't know how to date like normal people. Last time I did that, I got my nuts squashed. Not willing to go there again."

  "Not now or..."

  He shrugged. "Maybe not ever."

  I blinked. "So this was all about sneaking around, the thrill of it? After I walk out of here, we're done for good?"

  He didn't look happy with that possibility either. I felt nauseous, my stomach tight and knotted. I'd just put all that out there. I'd pulled my heart out of my chest and put it in his hands. Whether he twisted and crushed it or cradled and treasured it was entirely out of my control.

  "Jordan..." I scooted up to him, put my palms on his cheeks, splayed out my fingers and gently guided his head so that he would look at me. My eyes met his, and I peered into those murky depths--today, the color of silt and seawater. "Let me tell you something. There's a big difference between the person you see when you look in the mirror and the one I see when I look at you. The one you see was betrayed by a childhood lover, rejected by a father who was angry at you because you didn't live up to his dream. But the man I see? He's strong and sensitive. Protective, brilliant, caring. You put yourself out there for me--with the video, when Gunnar was pulling his shit, when Cari was threatening me. You didn't have to do those things, but you did. And I'll be forever grateful. But it's not why I love you. I love you because of who you are when I look at you. Not what I want you to be."

  Something in his eyes changed. They were hard. And I still couldn't read him or his face, but his hands slid around my waist to pull me against him into a tight hug.

  He didn't say anything, just held me there. I could feel his wild heartbeat beneath mine as our bodies pressed together. I could get lost in this feeling, the security of his arms around me, despite this uncertainty of what his feelings were. I didn't need a label from him right now if he was too afraid to admit the truth. But he couldn't deny it. He did care, as he'd shown over and over again with his actions.