A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court

CHAPTER XXXVIII

SIR LAUNCELOT AND KNIGHTS TO THE RESCUE

Nearing four in the afternoon. The scene was just outside thewalls of London. A cool, comfortable, superb day, with a brilliantsun; the kind of day to make one want to live, not die. Themultitude was prodigious and far-reaching; and yet we fifteenpoor devils hadn't a friend in it. There was something painfulin that thought, look at it how you might. There we sat, on ourtall scaffold, the butt of the hate and mockery of all thoseenemies. We were being made a holiday spectacle. They had builta sort of grand stand for the nobility and gentry, and these werethere in full force, with their ladies. We recognized a goodmany of them.

The crowd got a brief and unexpected dash of diversion out ofthe king. The moment we were freed of our bonds he sprang up,in his fantastic rags, with face bruised out of all recognition, andproclaimed himself Arthur, King of Britain, and denounced theawful penalties of treason upon every soul there present if hairof his sacred head were touched. It startled and surprised himto hear them break into a vast roar of laughter. It wounded hisdignity, and he locked himself up in silence. Then, althoughthe crowd begged him to go on, and tried to provoke him to itby catcalls, jeers, and shouts of:

”Let him speak! The king! The king! his humble subjects hungerand thirst for words of wisdom out of the mouth of their masterhis Serene and Sacred Raggedness!”

But it went for nothing. He put on all his majesty and sat underthis rain of contempt and insult unmoved. He certainly was greatin his way. Absently, I had taken off my white bandage and woundit about my right arm. When the crowd noticed this, they beganupon me. They said:

”Doubtless this sailor-man is his minister--observe his costlybadge of office!”

I let them go on until they got tired, and then I said:

”Yes, I am his minister, The Boss; and to-morrow you will hearthat from Camelot which--”

I got no further. They drowned me out with joyous derision. Butpresently there was silence; for the sheriffs of London, in theirofficial robes, with their subordinates, began to make a stir whichindicated that business was about to begin. In the hush whichfollowed, our crime was recited, the death warrant read, theneverybody uncovered while a priest uttered a prayer.

Then a slave was blindfolded; the hangman unslung his rope. Therelay the smooth road below us, we upon one side of it, the bankedmultitude wailing its other side--a good clear road, and kept freeby the police--how good it would be to see my five hundred horsemencome tearing down it! But no, it was out of the possibilities.I followed its receding thread out into the distance--not a horsemanon it, or sign of one.

There was a jerk, and the slave hung dangling; dangling and hideouslysquirming, for his limbs were not tied.

A second rope was unslung, in a moment another slave was dangling.

In a minute a third slave was struggling in the air. It wasdreadful. I turned away my head a moment, and when I turned backI missed the king! They were blindfolding him! I was paralyzed;I couldn't move, I was choking, my tongue was petrified. Theyfinished blindfolding him, they led him under the rope. I couldn'tshake off that clinging impotence. But when I saw them put thenoose around his neck, then everything let go in me and I madea spring to the rescue--and as I made it I shot one more glanceabroad--by George! here they came, a-tilting!--five hundred mailedand belted knights on bicycles!

The grandest sight that ever was seen. Lord, how the plumesstreamed, how the sun flamed and flashed from the endless processionof webby wheels!

I waved my right arm as Launcelot swept in--he recognized my rag--I tore away noose and bandage, and shouted:

”On your knees, every rascal of you, and salute the king! Whofails shall sup in hell to-night!”

I always use that high style when I'm climaxing an effect. Well,it was noble to see Launcelot and the boys swarm up onto thatscaffold and heave sheriffs and such overboard. And it was fineto see that astonished multitude go down on their knees and begtheir lives of the king they had just been deriding and insulting.And as he stood apart there, receiving this homage in rags,I thought to myself, well, really there is something peculiarlygrand about the gait and bearing of a king, after all.

I was immensely satisfied. Take the whole situation all around,it was one of the gaudiest effects I ever instigated.

And presently up comes Clarence, his own self! and winks, andsays, very modernly:

”Good deal of a surprise, wasn't it? I knew you'd like it. I'vehad the boys practicing this long time, privately; and just hungryfor a chance to show off.”