Misspent Youth

  Despite himself, a tiny smile played along Tim’s mouth. “Does it have to be a farting sound?”

  “That’s my boy.”

  THE REPORTERS WERE THANKFULLY STILL ABSENT from the entrance to the Manton estate. By some miracle, news that he’d had an accident hadn’t yet leaked from the hospital. They drove past the estate’s regimented houses, where disapproving residents watched them from their patio chairs. When they reached Alison’s bungalow they couldn’t park in the drive. A van and a pickup truck were already occupying it. The van belonged to a commercial house-cleaning company, while the pickup had the name of a landscape gardener printed down the side. Behind them was Sue’s Merc coupe. Tim blinked at it as he lumbered out of the taxi. He shot Alison an astonished look. She merely shrugged gamely.

  The back of the pickup was already full of hedge trimmings, branches pruned from trees and shrubs, and a half dozen black polyethylene bags bulging with cuttings and weeds. Three men were working hard on the front garden, cutting the privet bushes back into shape and spreading mulch over the freshly weeded borders. Tim hadn’t ever known the bushes were topiary. A big mower robot was trundling across the lawn, shaving the grass down to a golf-course neatness and scarifying the abundant moss.

  Tim was just about to ask what was going on when his mother came out the front door. Without a word she put her arms around him and hugged tight. Tim didn’t protest what the embrace was doing to his wrenched shoulder.

  “I love you,” she whispered. “Don’t you ever ever do anything like that again.”

  It looked like that was shaping up as the theme of the day. He tried to give her a reassuring smile when she let go, but it faltered when he saw the tears glinting in her eyes. She wiped them away quickly.

  “I’m sorry,” he told her earnestly. “That wasn’t me. Really. That was somebody else, somebody stupid. He’s gone. Honestly.”

  “Thank you.” She kissed his brow, then straightened up. “Come on, let’s get you inside.”

  Tim was sure he must have been away for a month. The cleaning crew had magicked a complete transformation on the inside of the bungalow. Carpets were still slightly damp, smelling faintly of chemicals but revealing colors he’d never seen before. Wooden furniture had been polished to a smooth sheen, while painted wood had brightened by several shades. Windows were now fully transparent. His bed was made up with freshly pressed linen that he recognized from the manor. “Mrs. Mayberry brought it over,” Sue said. The wardrobe was full of his clothes, all neatly laundered. Two plastic boxes were crammed with other essentials from his room, crystals loaded with software and games, PCglasses, his personal datasphere interface module, peripherals, books, badminton racquet and shuttlecocks, along with a whole load of other junk.

  “Thanks, Mum.”

  SUE AND ALISON had obviously established some weird kind of truce. They were civil to each other the whole time. Tim sat in the living room, studying the newly manicured back garden while Sue made tea in the kitchen. He’d checked that out earlier, too; the freezer was full of new food packets, almost all of which were his favorite meals.

  “Who’s taking care of all this?” he asked, waving an arm vaguely toward the clean flagstones of the patio.

  “Your father is,” Sue said firmly. “He’ll see the invoices on the household account when he gets home. If he’s got a problem with that he can complain to me.”

  “Oh.” Tim took a drink of his tea.

  “He can’t just sling you out and expect you to cope like some sort of charity case. Whether he likes it or not, he has responsibilities.”

  Tim considered that quietly. The concept of responsibility wasn’t one he’d connected with Jeff recently, nor Annabelle. But it did seem a more adult trait than the heedless exuberance they practiced. Or jumping a Jet Ski. “I’ve still got my allowance.”

  “Which he’ll have to review. It was fine for when you were living at home, but now that you’re heading off for university that’ll need revising upward.”

  Which was a prospect that Tim savored.

  “Are you going to talk to him?” Alison asked.

  “Suppose so.”

  Alison told her domestic computer to connect them. Tim sat back in the couch as the big wall-mounted screen lit up, grateful to have his mother beside him. His father must have been waiting for the call: When the image came up it showed him sitting expectantly in a room with wooden floors and walls. There was a veranda behind him, with a glimpse of very blue sea in the background. It looked beautiful.

  Jeff leaned forward in his cane chair, giving the screen an intent stare. “Tim. You don’t look too bad, son.”

  “I’m all right.”

  “I haven’t slept all night from worry.”

  “It’s just some cuts and stuff.” He lifted his leg up to show the camera the thick layer of artificial skin wrapping his swollen ankle. “And this.”

  “What did the doctors say?”

  “Nothing much, they’re monitoring me.”

  “Good. That’s good.”

  Tim wondered if Jeff was feeling as discomfited as he did—he certainly looked very self-conscious. There were a whole load of things he wanted to say, maybe even shout at him again. But not with his mum and Alison in the same room.

  “Uh, Annabelle says hello, and she hopes you’re all right.”

  “Really?” Out of the corner of his eye, Tim could see his mother’s expression turning severe.

  “Tim, I’ll be back in a few days,” Jeff hurried on. “I’d be truly grateful if I could come over and talk to you. I know I can’t put right what’s happened, but please don’t shut me out. You mean the world to me. After what happened on the Jet Ski I know that more than ever. I was really frightened for you, son. So if all you want to do is shout at me and tell me how vile I’ve been, then feel free. If that’s the price of seeing you again, I’m more than happy to pay it.”

  Tim hung his head, unable to look at the camera lens. Blokes just didn’t talk all this emotional stuff, it was embarrassing. “I’ll be around for a while before I go to Oxford. If you want.”

  “I do, Tim. I want that very much. And thank you for giving me the chance. I love you, son.”

  “Yeah. Well. Okay. I’ll maybe see you when you get back, then.”

  Jeff’s understanding smile lingered a while after the rest of the image vanished from the screen. Tim shook his head gravely, not quite sure who had been forgiving who.

  “You did well,” Sue assured him. “He knows he’s the one that has to grovel.”

  “I don’t think I really want that. I just…I want everything to have not happened.”

  “There’s a lot of things in my life I feel the same about,” Alison said as she lit another cigarette. “You’ve just got to face them down and—”

  “Move on,” Tim said. “Yeah, I think I’ve got that message now.”

  HE WAITED UNTIL LATER THAT EVENING, after his mother had left and when he was alone in his room, before calling Vanessa.

  “My God,” she squealed. “Are you all right? Martin called me and told me what happened. His parents were given a real dressing-down by the Tallington people for letting you out unsupervised. What were you thinking of?”

  “I wasn’t, really. That was the problem. I was…I don’t know, angry with the world, I suppose.”

  “Does it hurt?”

  “Only when I laugh.”

  Her smile of admiration was wide and sincere. Tim had never noticed before how big her smile actually was; on a face that was so compact and dainty it was almost overwhelming.

  “You still staying with your aunt?”

  “Till I go to Oxford, yeah.”

  He hadn’t known how easy she was to chat to, either. They talked away for over half an hour, their conversation butterflying through subjects. It was strange; he didn’t try to impress her or be smart or cool. There wasn’t a lot of point—she knew him too well for that. Yet she still kept talking and joking with him. In the end he
simply said: “My ankle should be all right again in a few days. Is that invitation to come and stay still open?”

  “’Course it is.”

  LIEUTENANT KROBER AND THE REST of the expanded Europol protection team were waiting for Jeff and Annabelle as soon as they cleared Heathrow’s customs hall. The officers closed in protectively around them before they moved down the concourse to the exit, still on a high-grade alert following the EIC’s article.

  Little was said between the two of them during the drive back to the manor. When they finally got home Lucy Duke was waiting with a whole file of engagements and interviews she’d fixed up. Jeff just sighed as she started in about schedules and charm offensives and said they’d review it all tomorrow.

  Annabelle almost laughed aloud at the way they got ready for bed that evening. Traveling and jet lag had left her weary without actually sleepy. So after supper they got undressed, folded their clothes neatly, slipped into dressing gowns, brushed their teeth. She felt as though they’d been married for fifty years. They lay on top of the bed, side by side, while the big wall screen buzzed away with news stream images she wasn’t watching.

  By this time in the chalet, Jeff and Karenza would already have stripped her naked. She’d be writhing between their indecent bodies as they began yet another long night of glorious lechery. Five days spent performing every fantasy Jeff could think of had left her feeling strangely contented, and very secure. After that kind of intimacy you couldn’t get any closer.

  They were a proper couple now. Just like Sir Mitch and Stephanie, she thought. The girls at school had always been scornful of the way she idolized Stephanie. They thought she was simply chasing fashion and celebrity for its own sake. They didn’t realize how much Annabelle admired the beach volleyball player for the way she’d conducted her life. Stephanie had grown up on an estate far worse than the one in Uppingham where the Goddards lived; she’d broken out by using her talent and exercising an unwavering determination. Stephanie set herself goals and accomplished them. Her life was an inspiration. Annabelle knew she was going to do exactly the same thing. Someday.

  Actually meeting her idol that day at the launchwatch party had been among the happiest moments of her life. And Stephanie hadn’t laughed when she confessed she had ambitions, too, even though they were still vague. Stephanie knew enough about the tough side of life not to poke fun at people trying to better themselves.

  Now here Annabelle was, comfy with her man. And all because of the action she’d taken to achieve that.

  “I was only here for a few days before,” she said. “But it feels like home already.”

  Jeff squeezed her shoulder. “It is your home.”

  “Do you mean that?”

  “I do.”

  She rolled onto her side, and put her arm around him. “Thank you. I don’t want to go back to my dad’s house. Not now. Not after everything.”

  “I don’t want you to go back to your dad, either. I told you that before Tim found us. I still mean it.”

  “I think I’m a little scared of living with someone in their house. I’ve never had a boyfriend who lasted more than a couple of months before, and they were never anything like this. I feel like I should be doing something, but I don’t know what.”

  “There’s no need to start psychoanalyzing this. You’re here because we fit together. We both knew that the first time we saw each other. There are no secrets, and we’ve never played games. We can talk, we make each other laugh, we make each other happy, I’ve never been so excited in bed. Trust me, that’s so much more than most relationships have.”

  “Is that enough? Will that make it last?”

  “For a hundred years, no. But I’ve started relationships with a lot less going for them.”

  “What about the rest of it, the other stuff?”

  “What other stuff?”

  “For a start, I don’t have any money.”

  “I have more than enough.”

  “I need an education. I can’t be a kept sex kitten for those ninety-nine years. We’d both wind up hating each other.”

  He smiled down at her, stroking her hair lazily. “Details. That’s all. We’ll sit down tomorrow and work out what you want to do, and how you can make it happen, and what compromises we have to make for each other.”

  “You don’t mind that?”

  “You having a life? God, no. I’d mind if you didn’t.”

  She moved around until she was lying on top of him, her head resting against his neck, eyes closed. “I love you, Jeff,” she whispered. “I love you so much.”

  THE NEXT MORNING JEFF WOKE UP with a mild headache. He put it down to the flight back from Miami; even today after all the health scares and regulation, aircraft still had awful cabin air. And getting up with a headache was always a rotten way to start the morning; it invariably meant the rest of the day would go badly. After he took a couple of synthesized neurofens he drove the Jag over to Manton. A Livewire Security car was parked by the housing estate’s gates, with a couple of staff sitting inside, giving a hard stare to anyone who drew up in front. He gave them a friendly wave as he showed his identity smartcard at the sensor post, which they ignored.

  Alison greeted him at the door. Her thick straw hair was awry, coffee stains pimpled the green cardigan she wore, and the last centimeter of her Cuban cigarette oozed out a strand of smoke as she put her arm around him for a platonic kiss.

  “Expecting someone important?” he asked cheerfully.

  “Don’t.” Her throaty voice was even deeper than usual. “I’ve had your wife here, remember. I felt like I should be wearing my Sunday best the whole time.”

  “I know she was here,” he said grimly, looking around the spruced-up hall. “I saw the invoices this morning.”

  “That’s the very least you should be paying for.”

  “I know.”

  She shut the door. “You look very fit and tanned.”

  “Thanks. Is he up?”

  “He’s in the living room. And you be careful what you say.”

  “Yes!”

  “I can’t believe you did that to him.”

  “Alison. Please.”

  “All right, I’ll go and do domestic things in the kitchen like a good girl. There’s probably some water drops spilled on the counter. I’d hate to be shot for not wiping them up quickly enough.”

  Jeff was in half a mind to ask her to stay with him. Walking into the next room required the same kind of courage as telling the doctor to get on with a surgical procedure.

  Despite the clean-up operation, the pictures on the wall hadn’t changed. Jeff smiled at the warrior maidens in their brass bikinis; he even remembered one of them, a model he’d managed to meet, thanks to the cover artist. That must have been fifty years ago. What must she look like now?

  Tim was lying on one of the patio’s sunloungers, wearing just a pair of navy blue shorts. His body was dappled by tiny sunbeams that had broken through the shade of the neatly trimmed remnants of wisteria. The lighting made the marquetry patches of artificial skin very prominent, a strange gray-white color against the boy’s natural skin. His crutches were propped up beside him.

  “Hello, son.”

  “Dad.” Tim pushed his PCglasses up onto his forehead.

  Jeff sat down on the edge of the sunlounger opposite, almost toppling it over. “Shit.” He sat back properly. “Great start.”

  “You’re very brown. Didn’t you wear sunblock in Antigua?”

  “Yes, I put sunblock on. How are you?” He indicated the medical coverings.

  “Not so bad. They itch a bit. Most of them will be off in another couple of days.”

  “You need to learn to steer better.”

  “Yeah. I’m sorry about the Jet Ski.”

  “Don’t even bother thinking about it. All I care is that you’re on the mend. I never used the stupid thing anyway. In any case, it’s me who’s in the wrong. We both know that.”

  Just when he finally t
hought he was coming to terms with it all, Tim could feel the tears welling up behind his eyes. It was difficult to make his throat work properly; the muscles seemed to be tightening up. “She was my girlfriend, Dad.”

  “Oh shit. I don’t know what to say, son. Sorry is so pathetic.”

  “You knew I loved her. You knew that.”

  “We were really trying to stop you from finding out. We’d have kept it quiet until you’d got over her. You know there’s no way I wanted you to be hurt like this. You do know that, don’t you?”

  The amount of desperation in his father’s voice was making Tim squirm inside. But he was resolved not to give in, not to take the easy route. That was being adult, and true to himself. “Dad, there’s a big difference between me not knowing and the two of you getting involved. Trying to spare my feelings doesn’t cut it, you know.”

  “Yeah.” The time Jeff had spent on Antigua was shrinking to a wistful memory now. He was worried that Tim would ask him to do something to prove his contrition, which was a selfish thought. He almost wished there really was some act of penance to perform that would close this down. “Um, look, do you want to go and see a shrink about all this? I’ll come with you.”

  “Oh thanks, Dad,” Tim snorted. “Now I’m a nut case on top of everything else.”

  “No you’re not. I just wondered if that would help you come to terms with what’s happened.”

  “Ah, that’s what this is about. I’ve got to be the one who adjusts. It’s me who has to accept this with a smile.”

  “You think I can go through life knowing my son hates me?”

  “Then you shouldn’t have done it, should you.”

  Jeff was badly tempted. All it would take was one sentence. It wasn’t just me, you’ve no idea what Annabelle is really like. He was still incredulous that she’d had lesbian sex in order to please him; and so eagerly, too. He’d never known ecstasy like those five days; it was narcotic. But that was the one thing he couldn’t say; Tim would reject him completely. He could still remember the feeling of hopelessness permeating his life before he met Sue, believing despite memory crystals and the accolades he’d earned that he’d wasted his life. The day Tim had been born was the happiest he’d ever known. It was a strange way to learn that as a parent his love was truly unconditional and everlasting. “I never deserved a son like you,” he said forlornly. “Just promise me you won’t screw up like me.”