Soul Fire

  ~Chapter Nineteen~

   

   

   

   

   

   

   

   

  The next morning when I woke, he was gone. I emerged into the clearing to find him crouched next to the fire, stirring something in a pot sitting in the coals. A small crowd of the fire puppets were sitting around the pot, watching curiously.

  “Morning,” I said, trying not to let the strain in my throat through.

  “Good morning,” he replied, and I immediately noticed something different about his voice.

  My heart plummeted. Was this going to be a day of very forced companionship?

  “Is anything wrong?” I asked, fighting to keep my voice casual.

  “Uh... actually,” he sat back on the log and I plonked down next to him. “I’ve decided to end things with Eleanora.”

  I looked away from him, my heart beginning to increase in pace.

  “So what are you going to do?” I asked quietly, trying not to give anything away.

  “I’ll see how it goes for a few more days, I suppose.”

  We both sat pensively. Suddenly everything seemed brighter, happier to me, a contrast to Phoenix’s gloominess. He genuinely liked her, I realised suddenly, and my happiness suddenly seemed selfish.

  “Maybe you should talk to her?” I asked, very quietly. “Unless the whole thing was an act to keep me away from you.”

  “No,” he said just as quietly. “It wasn’t. I do like her but... she’s not... never mind.”

  I stood up abruptly, and strode down to the stream. I sat down heavily on my rock and began stirring my fingers in the mud, wondering if I could create a mud puppet. It was only when I had a small army of them made of mud and twigs that I realised Phoenix was standing behind me.

  “We’re a day ahead of schedule,” he said. “Do you want to practice?”

  “Practice?” I asked.

  “Hand to hand combat, magical combat, etc. Out here you could show your true power without fear.”

  “What do you know of my power?” I asked.

  It was true that I’d always held back in class. One time I’d managed to knock Yu off of his feet with the force of my magical blast, and the next day Netalia sat in on our class. She claimed to be there just to observe our progress, but her eyes never left me.

  “I know you’re capable of a lot more than you’ve shown anyone,” his eyes were unreadable. “Those fire puppets took me months to master, and last night you made yours within seconds. And those mud people,” he nodded at my army of mud puppets who clutched at my boot, blinking up at me. “Those aren’t puppets. They’re alive.”

  I knelt in the mud, uncaring that I was getting my breeches muddy. The mud people clustered around the hand I held out to them, leaving muddy streaks where they grasped my fingers.

  “Oh my goodness,” I breathed as one climbed onto my hand. I lifted it to my face. “They’re alive.”

  The mud person on my hand looked at me with eyes made of tiny chips of pebbles, smiling at me with his twig mouth. It was definitely conscious, but worse, it was intelligent.

  “Why did you let me create them?” I asked almost tearfully.

  “I didn’t. You created these all by yourself. The fire puppets were only coals and ash, but these creatures,” Phoenix knelt in the mud, facing me. He held out a hand to the mud people and one climbed onto his hand as well. “They’re sentient beings, Sky; you created new life.”

  “But why can I do that?” I asked quietly. “No one else can.”

  Phoenix lifted the mud person to his eye level.

  “I’m not too sure yet,” the mud person reached out a little hand a touched his nose, leaving a splotch of mud there. “But you should tell no one of this.”

  “Of course,” I lowered my mud person back to the ground. He jumped off of my hand and ran back to the others. Phoenix lowered his as well. “What do I do for them?”

  “You’ve done enough. They’re intelligent enough to stay alive.”

  Sure enough, the mud people were already migrating further up-stream.

  “I daresay they’ll build little shelters and find a food source. One day there might be whole villages of them.” Phoenix finished, his eyes on me.

  We watched them head off, some of them collecting twigs on the way.

  “You’re an enigma, Sky,” Phoenix said finally. “Just when I think I’ve got you figured out a little bit, you do something like this.”

  “I didn’t mean to.”

  “I know you didn’t.”

  The mud people had moved so far up stream that I couldn’t see them anymore.

  “So, um, practice, you were saying?” I asked, eager to change the subject.

  We headed back to our campsite, the fire burning low. Phoenix stood on the other side of it to me.

  “Ok, let’s try not to hurt each other,” he began, swinging his arms to loosen his muscles.

  “I don’t think I could hurt you,” I said, doing the same.

  Phoenix raised an eyebrow.

  “You just created a whole new civilization. I think you could hurt me if you wanted to.”

  “But I don’t want to.”

  He smiled.

  “There you go. Just remember that, please.”

  Phoenix cleared the fireplace with a sweep of his arm, the coals moving as though caught in a heavy wind. They died instantly and were stone cold by the time they reached the edge of the clearing.

  “Please be gentle with me,” he reminded me, and then lunged for me.

  I stepped back and crossed my left arm over my chest. When he got close enough, I flung it back across my chest, catching him in the neck with my forearm. As he staggered, I hooked his feet out from under him. He went down like a rock, and I followed him to the ground. He landed on his side, and I quickly pushed him onto his stomach, kneeling on his back, yanking his arms up behind him. I gripped his wrists in one hand, and settled my other hand on the back of his neck, my thumb and forefinger on pressure points I knew would hurt if I chose to tighten my hand.

  “I said be gentle. Ow.”

  “Oh right. Sorry.”

  I let him go, my nerves clambering about being in such close proximity to him again. He rose quickly, too quickly to be innocent. I blocked his first swing and leapt over the foot he’d swept across meaning to drop me like I’d dropped him. I twisted to the side, pivoting my arm that still blocked his. His arm became pinned in by my side. He lashed at me with his feet, and I grabbed one, dumping him on his face again. I let go off his arm as he fell.

  “You’re good,” he said appreciatively.

  “I’m sorry if I hurt you.”

  “It would take a little more than that to hurt me,” he said, and I remembered the scars that marked his body.

   “Done?” I asked a little while later.

  “Yes,” he panted. He was favouring his right side, and I immediately felt bad. “I don’t have to worry about you as much as I thought. I suspected you were holding back in class but I had no idea how much. How did you learn so much?”

  I shrugged.

  “It just came to me naturally,” I lifted my hand from my side, commanding the ropes to return to me. They shimmered back into ropes of magic and I reabsorbed them.

  He climbed to his feet and stood looking at me for a second, admiration in his eyes.

  “You’re amazing,” he said, and I turned away before he could see me blush.

  “Oh come on, you weren’t even really trying,” I said, heading to the tent to pack it up.

  “No, alright, I wasn’t.” He meandered over to the tent and helped me pull it down.

  Suddenly, something that he’d said struck me anew.

  “Hold on,” I said, pausing in the act of rolling up the canvas. “You said you didn’t have to worry about me as much as you thought. Why did you say that?”

  He didn’t answer and his expression was unr
eadable.

  “Phoenix. Why do you need to worry about me?”

  “It’s just a hunch,” he said roughly, continuing to pack our tent up. “It’s nothing to worry about, I really-“

  “Phoenix,” I interrupted, and he stopped.

  “It’s nothing, really. It’s just... I used to get letters every week from my last foster father in the Mountains,” I stopped working, listening closely. “And now, for three weeks, there have been none.”

  “And is that cause for worry?” I asked, and he shrugged.

  “I don’t know. I don’t want to.”

  “You said you had no family,” I said, trying not to sound like I was accusing him.

  “My last foster father had different ideals about the world. He tried to teach them to me and I left to come to the Academy. The letters were further pleas for me to understand.”

  “Oh.”

  “But it’s nothing,” he repeated, looking up at me. “Nothing to worry about, I swear.”

  We finished packing up our campsite in silence and then set off on the trail. The sun had come out and it was a warm autumn day for once.

  We pulled off our travelling cloaks and walked side by side, chatting amiably. Suddenly we came to a water fall.

  “Phoenix,” I said in surprise. “It’s the water hole!”

  We looked at each other for a second, then dumped our packs and pulled our boots and tunics off. We swam about for a bit and then floated on our backs.

  “You know this means that we’re close to returning to the Academy,” Phoenix said, looking up at the sky.

  “I know,” I replied heavily. This had felt so much like a holiday that I didn’t want it to end.

  “When we get back to the Academy, everything has to go back to the way it was. I have to pretend like I don’t like you again.”

  My stomach sank but I nodded.

  “Don’t tell anyone about the trip either. Or… anything that occurred on it,” he continued.  “Netalia and Iain have ears everywhere.”

  “What are they listening for?” I asked, watching a few birds fly over head. “Gossiping students?”

  “If it’s about us, yes.”

  “Why? Are we so special?”

  “You can’t know.”

  “But you do!” I protested.

  “Yes, I do.”

  I swam to the side and got out. Phoenix followed me a second later.

  “You know, I’d almost think that you were ashamed of me,” I said, lying down on the rock to dry off.

  Phoenix lay down next to me.

  “The last thing I feel towards you, Sky, is shame. Unless it’s about how I’ve been treating you, but I swear, I swear, there is a reason,” and then he said so quietly I almost missed it. “I can’t lose you.”

  “Why would you lose me?”

  He looked at me in surprise.

  “Your hearing is good. I’m still not telling you.”

  We headed back to the Academy in the evening, my steps falling heavier and heavier as we neared the grounds. We were met by Jett and Yu, who’d been waiting for the students to emerge from the woods. I handed our equipment to Jett, who was marking things off as they were returned.

  “How’d you go?” he asked, and I remembered what Phoenix had said.

  “Yeah, it was great,” I said dryly. “Stuck with him for three days was a laugh and a half.”

  Jett sighed and took our sleeping roll from me. I headed back up to the castle, acting as though I couldn’t see Phoenix a few steps in front of me. When I got to the double doors, Dena and the others were waiting for me.

  “How was it?” Dena asked worriedly.

  “Oh... great,” I said sarcastically. “Simply fantastic.”

  Everyone winced in sympathy with me. From the sounds of it, they’d all had a great time. I ached to admit that I had too, but I trusted Phoenix enough to keep my mouth shut.

   Agreeing to meet everyone downstairs later, I headed up to my room to change. I thought back over the camping trip, smiling secretly at all of the new memories. My heart fluttered happily as I thought of Phoenix; this must’ve been what all of those romance books in the library that Yasmin and Rain read religiously were on about. I’d never felt this way about any guy before. Suddenly another memory struck me, from my first few days in the castle.

  “There’s just one thing you don’t do.”

  “Which is?”

  Jett glanced at me.

  “Never fall in love with them.”

  “What? But you said it wasn’t anything romantic like.”

  “Sometimes people have a tendency to disobey tradition. Trust me, the repercussions aren’t worth it.”

  I swallowed, hard. I had forgotten. What were the repercussions? Nerves were beginning to flutter in my stomach. Tying my hair into a knot and securing it with a pin, I examined my reflection in the mirror.

  There was only one person I could go to now. Because now I understood.

  I stepped into the corridor and then broke into a run, hoping desperately that I wouldn’t meet anyone. I didn’t, and I made it to the stairs that led to Jett’s office. Tears had spilled over and I felt them run slowly down my cheeks. I climbed the stairs and knocked on the door.

  “Come in.” I heard Jett call.

  Fighting down panic, I opened the door and stepped inside, closing the door behind me.

   “Jett.” I said hoarsely, stepping out of the shadows.

  He looked up and saw the tears on my face.

  “Sky, what...”

  “Tell me about your soul mate, Jett.”

  He watched me for a long while as my heart broke. After a few long seconds, he stood and went to the window set behind his desk that looked out over the valley.

  “Her name was Lena. We were the same age; her eyes were green,” He turned around. “Exactly the same green as yours, Sky.”

  I looked down.

  “For the first few months, I couldn’t have been happier. I’d found my other half; why wouldn’t I be happy? But soon I knew something was troubling her. She wouldn’t tell me what it was, and she started ignoring me, much the way Phoenix ignored you... in the beginning anyway. Eventually I found out.” Jett looked at me with resigned dark eyes. “She was in love with me. And when it came to light, I found I felt the same way.”

  I took a sharp intake of breath.

  “For a few months we went undiscovered. But then one of the other students who hated me, but loved her, guessed. He went to the Master of the school, and we were both taken up to the office,” he covered his face with his hands for a second, then took them from his face and continued. “She covered for me. She said she had bewitched me. I tried to protest but she bound me with magic.”

  Silence fell.

  “What happened to her?” I asked fearfully.

  More silence. I was beginning to think he wouldn’t answer me when he did.

  “They banished her back to the human realm.”

  My heart fell like a stone. More tears gathered and spilled over.

  “They banished her, Sky! For something she couldn’t help,” he leant against the window. “She lives out in one of the human cities, with no magic and no memory of any of this. I could stand in front of her and yell her mage name, and she would not remember. And you’ve been fool enough to make her mistakes!”

  I was immediately on the defensive.

  “You said it was something she couldn’t help. How can I help feeling this way? I can’t. I’ve suffered for months watching him fall in love with Eleanora!”

  “They’ll banish you, Sky, like they did Lena! Do you want to go back to Ar Cena? You’ll never see him again. And how do you think he’s felt, watching you and Dustin? He did well to hide his feelings for you, to pretend that he almost hated you. Phoenix knows the stakes.”

  “It will never come to light, like it did with you. I can hide my feelings, and hope like hell they go away.” I snapped, reddening as he mentioned Dustin.

&nbs
p; “It will never go away!” He yelled back. “It’s always the students with the green eyes. Always.”

  I suddenly remembered how cold Netalia had always been towards me.

  “As soon as Netalia saw the colour of your eyes, you and Phoenix were put on watch. You have Iain himself watching you! I’m supposed to be as well, but they know I don’t agree with this law. They question me every few weeks, and I always give them the same report.”

  He shuffled through some papers on his desk.

  “These are the orders I’ve been issued with.”

  He handed me a piece of paper. I read it quickly. It stated that if I began to show any romantic feelings for Phoenix or vice versa, we were to be brought before Iain and questioned.

  “I’ve been living in a trap this whole time?” I asked quietly.

  “Yes. Though everyone hoped the curse might be lifted,” he eyed me off, somewhat disappointedly. “Though, it appears not.”

  I threw the paper back onto his desk.

  “How many times has… this happened before?” I demanded.

  “A few times in the past three centuries, though only two of notable mention. That shade of green doesn’t come up very often, but we’re wary when it does.”

  I paced the room.

  “Were you ever going to tell me this?” I asked.

  Jett shook his head, and I resumed pacing. It made sense.

  “Phoenix knows all of this too, doesn’t he?” It wasn’t really a question.

  “Yes,” Jett said reluctantly.

  I left then, quickly, my heart hammering. I needed to get back to my room before anyone saw me.

  I wasn’t so lucky on this trip, however. I had just set foot on the base of the stairs when someone started coming down them.

  “You,” Eleanora said dangerously, her violet eyes flashing. “You disappear with him for three days and when he comes back he breaks up with me,” she descended the stairs and I stepped back. “Did you really think I wouldn’t notice?”

  “I had nothing to do with it,” I said, standing my ground now. She reached the bottom of the stairs but kept advancing. “If you must know, I tried to convince him to prolong his relationship with you. Obviously it didn’t work, but still. The thought that counts and all that.”

  Violet fire began to flicker along her arms. I summoned my own magic to my veins, but kept it hidden. I didn’t want to provoke her now that I knew I was being watched.

  “Sky!” Dena and Theresa rounded the corner and stopped dead when they saw Eleanora with the violet flames curling around her.

  “Protected by your friends?” she asked with a smirk, and I felt anger flash through my veins, flush with the magic I was beginning to summon closer and closer to the surface.

  “I don’t need protection,” I snapped, my emotions still riding high after my conversation with Jett. “I don’t know if you’ve forgotten, but it’s been a long time since we fought. I’m a lot better now.”

  “Last time we fought you ended up with a whip weal across the face,” she reminded me, hatred making her ugly. “Don’t tempt me to do it again.”

  It was an invitation. I flared magic into both of my hands as she summoned her fire whip.

  “Guys, stop!” Theresa yelled from the sidelines, but neither of us paid her any attention.

  “You think you’re so strong,” Eleanora said, uncurling the whip. “Killing the Du’rangor was a fluke. You had no idea what you were doing.”

  “But I do now,” I replied, quietly, dangerously. “You know I’ve killed two now? I sank a sword into the head of another one. I know exactly what to do now.”

  Surprise registered in a brief flicker, but then it was replaced by malice.

  “Oh you’re cute. You think you’re a big scary mage. You’ve been here for what, a year? I’ve grown up here. I know this world. And I know you don’t belong.”

  That hurt. I wished desperately for my twin swords.

  “Unlike you, I’ve lived in both worlds. That’s something you’ll never get to experience and I feel sorry for you for that.”

  “Don’t pity me!” she screeched. “You of all people do not get to pity me.”

  “But I do!” I replied, laughing, and it was only half hysterical. This was all the things I’d wanted to say to her, everything that I had pent up inside me. Every time we’d run the obstacle course together, when she’d broken my arm by scaring Echo; it certainly wasn’t about her parading Phoenix around like some kind of trophy... not at all. “You had one of the most powerful mages in the Academy and you lost him,” I leant forwards, almost shouting in her face. “He doesn’t want you!”

  The whip lashed through the air as she screamed something at me. I dodged it easily, winding my own fire around my hands.

  “Sloppy,” I tutted. “Very sloppy.”

  She screeched and lashed out at me again. More people were beginning to gather now, but they were staying well out of the reach of her whip.

  “Oh c’mon,” I rolled my eyes as the whip hit the flagstones where I’d been only a moment ago. “Seriously? Have you not practiced at all since last time?”

  She brought the whip down again. Timing it perfectly, I caught it in one fire covered hand, grabbing a hold of it and yanking it, pulling her closer.

  “I’ve learnt a few tricks,” I confessed, and pulled my dagger from my belt sheath, lengthening it with the same charm as I’d used on the Paw Islands and bringing it forward in the same movement.

  I severed the fire whip as she screamed, and one of my hunches was proved correct; she was also controlling the whip with her mind. I’d caused her physical pain by severing that link.

  “And that just makes it worse,” I told her disapprovingly as she fell to the floor from the pain. “Because you should have been better at that.”

  She pounded a fist against the floor, and what I thought had been an act of frustration turned out to be one of violence as an electric charge rolled towards me. I tried to block it, but I’d reacted too slowly. The charge snapped up through my body, reminiscent of the obstacle course nets.

  I gasped as the pain released me, more angry with myself than hurt. She’d used my cockiness to her advantage.

  “That’s a new one,” I told her, trying to keep the gruff admiration of out my voice.

  “I invented it,” she told me curtly, climbing to her feet. “So you couldn’t possibly have seen it coming.”

  That was happening to me a lot lately. We both took up stances, ready to react if the other one moved. I held my small sword at the ready, though I wasn’t quite sure what to do with it; I didn’t really want to seriously injure her.

  A hush rolled through the crowd as one of the professor’s approached. Not wanting detention again, I shrunk the knife and slipped it back into my belt sheath. The crowd parted to let Netalia through, and I was sorely tempted to pull the sword back out.

  “What’s going on here?” she asked, beadily eyeing us both off.

  “We were having a conversation,” Eleanora said immediately, flipping her long hair. “Sky is ignorant.”

  I fought the urge to roll my eyes.

  “I am. She was helping me learn some new moves,” I told Netalia, lying almost as easily as Petre did.

  Netalia looked at us, trying to figure us out. It was pretty obvious that we’d been fighting, but it wasn’t obvious if the fighting had indeed been educational. She sniffed, making up her mind.

  “Very well,” she said stiffly. “But please refrain from doing so in the castle from now on. The grounds or the practice hall serve that purpose, not the corridors.”

  She continued on past everyone and slowly the crowd dispersed. Eleanora fixed me with a glare as though trying to figure me out, but then dismissed it and marched off past me.

  “What the hell was that about?” Theresa asked, watching the blonde woman stalk off.

  “Phoenix broke up with her and she thinks I had something to do with it,” I replied, shrugging.
r />   “Did you?” Dena asked after a second.

  “No,” I said, a little too fast. “But that reminds me... can I meet you guys in a little while?”

  “Sure,” Dena said, looking out the corner of her eye at Theresa. “We were heading to the games room.”

  “I’ll meet you there soon.” I said, and began to walk up the stairs.

  “Sky!” I turned around and faced Dena again. “Don’t do anything... hasty.”

  I nodded and continued on my way. I knocked on the door and stood waiting, my heart in my throat. I had almost lost my resolve completely when Dustin opened his door.

  “Sky… I guess I’ve been expecting this.”

  “Can I come in?” I looked up at him. “Please?”

  “Sure,” he stepped back, allowing me into his room. “To what do I owe the pleasure?” the pleasant tone in his voice was very forced.

  I got to the middle of his room and turned around, and my expression made him stop smiling.

  “Though I get the impression this isn’t going to be a pleasure,” he said quietly, not looking at me as he closed the door.

  “Dustin,” I began. “I’m really sorry. I’ve made up my mind.”

  He looked up at me sadly.

  “Is there a reason why?”

  I wrung my hands, biting my lip.

  “I just have a feeling things are about to get really complicated soon,” I said quietly.

  “You don’t like me anymore, do you?”

  My heart seemed to be gripped in a vice.

  “Dustin, I’m sorry-”

  “Don’t be,” he said, holding his hands out towards me. “I’m sadder right now than I’ve been in a long time, but please don’t be sorry.”

  He hugged me, and I gripped him tightly.

  “I am sorry, though, you know,” I said, sniffing up at him through my tears.

  “Me too,” he replied, and kissed the top of my head.

  We stood that way for a long time, clinging to each other. The awful feeling was back but I knew it’d be worse to drag it out. It would be painful for both of us.

  “Are we still friends?” I asked a little while later.

  “I wouldn’t have it any other way,” he said, stepping back from me, his eyes bright.

  “Thank you... for understanding. I’m sorry it couldn’t work out between us, Dustin.”

  “I know.”

  I left him alone and walked quickly back to my room. Despite what Dena and Theresa had said, I was in no mood to join them in the games room. I sat on my bed, resting my chin on the windowsill. Morri flew through the open window to perch on my head.

  “Hello,” I greeted him sadly. He peeped and began to preen my hair. “Long time no see.”

  The door opened behind me, and Morri flew to the person who entered. I didn’t need to turn around to know that it was Larni; she was the only other person he would go to apart from Jett, and the only other person who would enter my room without knocking.

  “Are you alright?” she asked quietly, and I shook my head slowly.

  “Dustin and I broke up.”

  “Oh,” silence fell, and I knew she didn’t know what to say.

  “I didn’t feel the same way about him anymore,” I said, turning around and kneeling on my bed.

  Larni met my gaze evenly.

  “And did someone else take his place?”

  Larni was the only one in the castle who could read me like an open book. Not even Dena knew me as well as Larni did.

  “Yes,” I replied, saving her the trouble of interrogating me.

  “I guess I don’t need to ask who,” she said sternly, sitting next to me on my bed. It was only then I realised she wasn’t carrying anything; she’d come on a social visit. “Remember what being a soul mate means, Sky. You can’t fall in love with him.”

  “And what if it’s too late?” I asked tearfully. “What happens then, Larni?”

  She stroked my hair with shaking fingers.

  “Then you try your best to fall out of it,” she replied unevenly. “You can’t love him, Sky.”

  “But I do,” I whispered, tears beginning to fall. “And he loves me.”

  Larni held me as I cried, terrified of myself. When she left, hours later, I rolled up into a ball on top of my covers and cried myself to sleep.