Firefly

  I unwrapped the blanket from her hips as I lowered her back onto the mattress and hovered over her for long moments as I took in the perfection now underneath me.

  Meeting her gaze, I whispered, “Fucking beautiful.”

  With one last kiss to her lips, I bent to suck her nipple into my mouth again, rolling my tongue around the hardened bud before moving to do the same to the other. She sucked in a sharp breath and reached for me when I bit down on the underside of her breast, but I was already moving down her stomach, leaving a trail of slow, openmouthed kisses as I went.

  “Dare.” My name was a warning and a plea as I moved lower, her heavy-lidded eyes widening as she watched me.

  I spread her legs, keeping my eyes locked on hers as I lowered myself, nipping at her thigh until I was hovering just above where she was ready for me.

  I leaned forward to taste her, teasing her with the tip of my tongue and nearly losing my mind when I did.

  She twisted on the mattress, her hands fisting in the blanket as my name fell from her lips.

  I wanted to consume her.

  I wanted to worship her.

  I wanted to hear her whimper like that for the rest of my life.

  “Please,” she said on a breath when I gave her another teasing lick. “Oh God, please.”

  I shifted away just enough to press a finger inside her and then another. My blood heating and pounding when I finally covered her with my mouth, devouring her the way I’d been keeping myself from.

  “That’s it, Firefly,” I growled when she tightened around my fingers, a shudder tearing through her as I spoke.

  Her hands gripped at my hair, her pleas nearly silent as she writhed, trying to hold on. She cried out when I nipped her clit then flattened my tongue against her, riding out her orgasm as she shook mercilessly against me.

  Those hooded eyes locked on me when I moved up her body, her mouth parted in ecstasy as she grabbed for me, trying to pull me closer and frantically tearing at my shirt as I pulled down my pants. Her legs wrapped around my hips when I positioned myself between her thighs. Her eyes fluttered shut when I pushed inside her, a whisper of a moan leaving her lips when I began moving.

  Each roll of my hips brought me closer to the end when I’d just started.

  It’d been too long.

  And it’d never been her.

  “Look at me,” I demanded.

  And she did. Her eyes lit up as if I’d just offered her the world with those three words, and God if I didn’t want to after all this time waiting for her.

  I bent, claiming her mouth the way I wanted to claim her. The kiss was rough, our lips and tongues fighting the way it felt like I was fighting to keep her.

  Her fingers tightened on my back, her nails digging in and urging me faster.

  Urging me to keep going.

  My head fucking spun as the need to make this girl mine nearly consumed me.

  But her fears and the darkness that crept back in when she disappeared had me pulling out at the last second, gripping myself in my fist and pumping my release onto her belly.

  Her eyes were wide with fascination, her chest moving with her exaggerated breaths as she watched.

  One of her hands slid from my back, her teeth sinking into her lip when she hesitantly slid the tips of two of her fingers through the mess on her stomach.

  And, fuck if that didn’t make me hard again.

  “I’m sorry. I don’t have protection, but I’ll get some,” I said, my words pushing through my rough breaths as I grabbed my shirt to clean her stomach and fingers. “I swear I’m clean. I just wasn’t expecting you.”

  “I know . . . I know. I trust you.”

  I pressed my mouth to hers and whispered, “Where did you come from?” The need that swirled deep in my gut was lighting her eyes when I pulled away. “Truth or dare.”

  A coy smiled tugged at her lips. “Dare.”

  “Don’t ever leave.”

  I blinked, trying to force my heavy eyelids to open.

  The room was quiet, void of any sound other than my rapidly pounding heart and Dare’s soft breathing beside me. So unlike the loud movie we’d fallen asleep to.

  And I felt like I’d slept for hours.

  The panic of not knowing the time—of knowing I’d fallen asleep—rushed through me quickly. Consuming and choking me.

  I maneuvered out of Dare’s hold and off the mattress, trying not to wake him but unable to ease my incessant need to hurry. Even still, I paused when my feet touched the cool, hardwood floor, my weight shifting from foot to foot as that electricity that thrummed between us called to me, pulling me back in the direction of Dare and the warmth and comfort he promised.

  But the new day promised things too.

  Even if Kieran hadn’t come back last night, Beck might be home by now. Depending on the time, he could be awake soon and notice my absence.

  My face pinched, an apology on my lips when I heard the mattress shift behind me.

  I twisted to see Dare now on his stomach, still asleep . . .

  I couldn’t breathe.

  That panic and fear from what seemed so long ago? It was nothing. Nothing compared to the horror rushing through me like gasoline.

  One breath would light a match. One step and I would go up in flames.

  Every nightmare I’d ever had was now just feet away. A reality. And it was on the man who had somehow captured my heart.

  Five lines—four horizontal, one vertical. One circle.

  Not just somewhere small on his body as I’d seen that one night so many years before, but covering the entire length of Dare’s toned back.

  A steel fist gripped my heart, crushing it slowly as I stared, silently begging for the image in front of me to disappear.

  Men who use the dark to their advantage.

  Lines and circles.

  Blood staining my carpet.

  A stuttered breath that sounded like a cry wrenched from me, and I slapped a shaking hand over my mouth in an attempt to mute it. My world was spiraling into confusion and betrayals and unknowns. How? How is this happening?

  Tears slipped down my cheeks as I hurried to grab the clothes Libby lent me, sneaking out of the unlocked room once dressed.

  My throat ached from holding back my sobs, but I needed to get out of this house. I needed to get away from these people who were tied to the family that had caused me so much pain.

  That wanted me dead.

  But even as I tried to force myself to keep walking—to grab my bag and run—I found myself slowing . . . found myself stopping and slumping against a wall until I was sliding down it. I buried my head in my hands as silent sobs wracked my body.

  I didn’t know how to handle what I’d just seen, but I couldn’t forget the past week. The last two years.

  I needed to leave. I needed to get far from this place. I knew that. But I couldn’t cage my heart now that it’d been freed.

  I couldn’t run from him because of who he was, when I’d been running to get away from myself for so long. A fact Dare had accepted without explanations.

  “Then lie to me.”

  I shakily stood, rubbing my hands across my face in a vain attempt to brush away the relentless tears.

  “Decision made?” a feminine voice called out.

  I jerked back against the wall, my hand flying to my chest to calm my racing heart. “God, Einstein.”

  She searched my face for a few seconds, then nodded toward the living room before walking past me to head that way. Never once checking to make sure I was following her.

  “I’m surprised it took you so long. Gotta say, I’m a little disappointed,” she said matter-of-factly, then clicked her tongue.

  “I sat down within seconds—”

  “Not what I meant.”

  I swiped at my cheeks again to brush away any lingering wetness, huffing when I said, “Then, as always, I’m not following you.”

  “Not many people do, Lily O’Sullivan.”


  My head snapped up, eyes widening when my name left her mouth. I quickly looked around us to see if anyone was within hearing distance, but it was just us.

  I tried to calm down. I tried to tell myself to channel the Lily that sat in on meetings. Blank stare, no reaction, impenetrable wall.

  But I couldn’t stop.

  I had already been too blindsided by Dare’s tattoo to respond rationally now.

  “I—what did you—I don’t under—”

  “Relax, no one else knows,” she said in a soothing tone I would’ve never expected from the wild-eyed girl in front of me.

  I couldn’t relax. She knew my name and her boyfriend’s best friend was a member of the Borellos.

  “If it helps you at all,” she went on when her keen eyes caught my rising panic, “I’ve known this whole time. I told you, there’s just something about your mouth.”

  “I don’t . . . I don’t understand.”

  “You’re Lily O’Sullivan. I know who you are. Earth to the not-so-dead princess.” She rolled her eyes and settled back into the chair.

  “What do you mean by whole time, and . . . and how do you know me?” My chest hitched with my too-fast breaths, and I fought to calm myself. “Why would you let me say I’m someone else? Who are you?”

  She drummed her fingers quickly on the arms of the chair as she waited for me to finish demanding answers, and sighed once she was sure I was done. “Well, I guess who I am depends on the decision you just made in the hall.”

  I glanced at the empty hall instinctively, then back to her. “What decision?”

  Einstein’s eyes rolled again, like she was frustrated with having to spell out things that should be simple. “I thought a mob princess would’ve put things together faster than you did, but I have my own theory for why you didn’t. I figured we’d never see you again because you would’ve figured it out. When you showed up last night and proved me wrong, I knew a day would come when you looked like you were a step away from a panic attack because you learned something about the man you were falling for. Today happened to be that morning. But since you didn’t leave, I can only assume you made a decision. Unfortunately, there are a lot of decisions you could’ve made. And I’m waiting to hear yours.”

  “You’re one of them,” I whispered, studying every movement she made as I did.

  But she simply sat there, waiting for my answer without seeming to care that I knew.

  Then again, if she was a member of the Borellos, she’d known about me and hadn’t said a word . . .

  “Decision?” she prompted after nearly a minute had passed.

  I loosed a weighted breath, lifting my hands helplessly before letting them fall. “How do I walk away from what we have? How do I pretend he didn’t completely change my life?”

  “How indeed?” she asked with a raised brow.

  “Look, I know how this ends,” I whispered harshly, leaning in toward her so my voice wouldn’t carry. “I knew when I couldn’t force myself to leave. I knew before you said my name. One day he’ll realize who I am. One day one of you—another one of you—will realize who I am. If I’m not killed immediately, then I’ll be turned over to Demitri Borello so he can do it. But I’d rather spend my time until that day comes loving Dare, than never experiencing another moment with him.”

  Einstein’s lips twitched into a smile. “So that’s it then?”

  “Yeah,” I said on a breath as I sat back. “That’s it.”

  We sat in uncomfortable silence before she said, “I finally put it together after you stabbed Johnny and everyone was waiting for you to wake up. I was putting your clothes in your purse and found your contacts in there. I wondered what you would look like without your glasses on . . . then I realized they were colored contacts. It didn’t take long after that.”

  “So, you’ve known for a week and haven’t said anything. Why?”

  “Two reasons.” She raised her hand so it was just barely hovering over the arm of the chair and lifted a finger, indicating one. “If you were really running from a man, then I knew exactly who you were running from, and I didn’t blame you for doing it. You know who I’m dating, but I refuse to be in the same room as the man you’re dating because he terrifies me in a way nothing ever has or will.”

  I started when I realized she meant Kieran. If only she knew how twisted her confession sounded to me. Or that I’d felt—and still feel—so terrified of Johnny and knew I never had to fear Kieran.

  “I wanted to make sure you had a place to go.” She lifted a second finger, indicating two. “And I was fairly sure this heart-to-heart would happen eventually. I wanted to make sure when it did that we understood each other. If I could keep you a secret to this house, then anything you found out about us didn’t need to be relayed to your house.”

  “Why would I say anything to my dad about Dare or his friends?”

  That hint of a smile widened. “Still don’t get it, do you? I really thought you’d be smarter.” When I stared at her blankly, she said, “Think about all of us, Elle. Who do you think we all are? Who am I?”

  “Einstein.”

  “And what do I do?” she prompted, dragging the last word out.

  “You frustrate me,” I responded immediately, but as soon as I said it, I remembered her words from last week when I’d woken up to find her fixated on my mouth.

  “I have a thing for locks and codes and puzzles.”

  “You’re a hacker,” I mumbled, my tone numb.

  The smile that lit up her face was feral. “Johnny, well . . . Johnny’s just Johnny. And the twins aren’t just hanging around because they’re hot. One’s a tracker, the other is a sniper. Combined? They’re basically our version of your boyfriend. Well, they’re not silent and invisible . . . but not everyone can be like Nightshade, and at least the twins have souls.”

  I was too stunned to defend Kieran. Not that Einstein gave me a chance to speak anyway.

  “Libby is actually Dare’s sister. But, as you can tell, she doesn’t really love being part of us. She sort of hates that she’s a—”

  “Borello.” Horror laced my tone and all the blood quickly drained from my head. “Elizabeth Borello. Oh God.” I shot off the couch and stumbled blindly away from it.

  Libby is Elizabeth fucking Borello. That means . . .

  “No. No, you’re just—no.”

  “You made your decision,” Einstein reminded me calmly.

  But that was before I’d known.

  The large room seemed to close in on me, a high-pitched ringing filled my ears.

  “I didn’t—I didn’t know!”

  Knowing he was a member of the Borello Gang was one thing. It was horrifying, but I knew I could still get past it.

  Knowing he was an actual Borello? Knowing he was Demitri Borello, the man responsible for so many Holloway deaths? The man whose father had been responsible for even more of our spilled blood?

  “Well, everybody is going to know who you are if you don’t calm down.”

  I reached for the couch, but still roughly fell onto it when it felt like the world was ripped out from under me.

  I’d given him my soul, and he wanted to destroy my heart. Destroy me.

  “He wants to kill me.” My voice was nearly inaudible even to my own ears.

  Einstein was silent so long that I finally looked at her, but her mouth was set in a grim line.

  “He’s going to kill me, isn’t he?” I asked, looking for confirmation and praying for a denial. “Oh God. Was it him? Was it him last week in my—” Words failed me when Einstein’s eyes flashed to mine only to quickly dart away.

  “We were tipped off,” she finally admitted.

  A sharp exhale burst from my chest, and suddenly I was off the couch again. I don’t remember moving. I only knew I had been sitting, trying to stop the room from spinning, and suddenly I was across the room and headed for the front door.

  Einstein slammed her weight into me, sending us both into the door and ma
king it so I could no longer get away. When she spoke, every word was sharp and edged with frustration. “I’ve kept your secret, so you’re going to hear me out. Someone sent a recent picture, trying to prove you were alive—which we just found out days before,” she added quickly when a pained laugh tumbled from my lips. “But I couldn’t use it, there was nothing identifying, and it was too far away. I told you last week, you’re safest here. I meant that. The most recent picture we have of you is from twelve years ago. It looks nothing like you, except—”

  “My mouth,” I finished for her. I whirled around when she pushed off me. “That doesn’t change who he is. That doesn’t change who I am. It doesn’t change that his family killed both of my brothers and tried to take me, or that he just destroyed my house looking for me. All my feelings aside, the man I just gave myself to wants to kill me.” I gritted my teeth, hating that my voice was shaking. “I can’t—”

  “And for good reason,” Einstein mumbled, then turned to walk toward the couches again.

  I stood there, stunned and unable to move as I watched her sit on the arm of the closest chair so she was facing me again.

  “If you were Elle and he was Dare, would you leave right now?”

  A sigh punched from my chest, and I sagged against the door. “No,” I finally whispered.

  “If you were you, and he was just a member?”

  “You already know what decision I made earlier, why are you asking?”

  Without responding to my question, she continued on, “If he were to come out here right now, knowing what you know about him, knowing who he is. Would you run away, or would you stay?”

  I opened my mouth to tell her she’d just prevented me from leaving, but hesitated.

  Every moment over the last two years flashed through my mind. Every look. Every note. Every kiss and every touch over the last week. Every word marked on my heart.

  “I would stay until it ends.”

  And just as I’d told Einstein earlier when I thought he was only Dare, member of the Borello Gang, I knew how this would end.

  We were like fire, but fire never lasts. And when it’s over, devastation is left in its wake.

  I swallowed past the agony tightening my throat, and said, “I still have to leave now. I have to get back before someone realizes I’m gone.”