Howl

Chapter 13 – Caught in Between

  With Evan gone it seemed like Christopher was more open towards me. He conversed much more, but it wasn’t about business or what had to be done, or facts about werewolves, it was about nothing in particular; setting me more at ease than I had been practically the entire trip. Knowing that we made it farther than we would have to travel to New Mexico made the rest of the trip that much more easy to take. I was happy for Christopher’s company though, he certainly liked to talk a lot. Maybe it was because he was warming up to me, or maybe it was just because he wasn’t sure how I felt before, and was able to talk now that Evan was gone.

  Perhaps things became less like a mission to him, and more like a trip for pleasure. I know it seemed more that way to me. Especially since there wasn’t really anything to worry about, if the police were looking for us they would have caught us by now… at least this was my thinking. We passed by plenty of police cars, but not a one stopped us or even thought we were in the slightest bit suspicious. Nothing out of the ordinary happened, and Chris didn’t tell me anything to make me believe that anything was out of the ordinary.

  We traveled all the way through the night, yet again, but it didn’t bother me as much as it normally would have. Before drifting off into sleep Chris informed me we were entering New Mexico. I guess that information contributed to it not bothering me as much as it normally would have with the knowing that that would be the last time I would have to sleep in the vehicle for a long time. Our destination was close.

  “Halle!” I awoke with a start. What’s going on? Someone was shaking my shoulder. I brushed the hair out of my face and rubbed my eyes in attempt to clear my blurred vision. Chris stood over me in the doorway of the car. He bent down and kissed me on the forehead. “We’re here.”

  Forcing myself upright in my seat, I looked around. In front was a grey wall—no, a building; a big, tall, grey building. The car was parked in front of the building. Chris took a few steps back, I rose from my seat bracing myself against the door and the headrest of the seat—I was still half asleep. I stood, blinking in attempt to force my eyes to wake up faster than they wanted. All that registered in my mind was we were here. Finally, we made it to our destination. Wrapping my arms around Christopher’s neck, gently, my lips brushed his and then both locked together.

  My feet shifted position and I heard a crunch under my feet. Feeling more awake, I analyzed my surroundings more thoroughly. I stood in dirt. We were in the middle of nowhere. There was a small area of cleared land—which was where we stood, but everywhere else was nothing more than cacti and other dry, desert foliage. It felt like we were back at Henry’s house, but I knew we weren’t, and having Chris right beside me—especially with the time we bonded, soothed my mind knowing everything would be all right with him by my side.

  Now that we were here, I wondered what would happen next. Chris didn’t seem quite so thrilled. He even looked a little cumbersome. The smile I wore faded when the feeling in the pit of my gut took over and curiosity overwhelmed me. I didn’t say anything though. I would not be the first to speak. I refused to speak.

  “Halle,” Chris started. I looked up into his deep grey eyes and he looked back into mine. It felt like he was reading my every thought. “It’s you’re choice what you want to do, but you have to choose what you want to do now.” He paused again and placed a hand on my shoulder soothingly. I was frozen to the spot. “This is a place to help you get your life as a werewolf started, to help you cope, and help to train you so that you can protect yourself against all who try to harm you.” I couldn’t blink, I couldn’t breathe. I knew what was coming. I knew it. “Either stay here or go with me.” He said it, and I knew he would.

  After all of this time with Chris, I didn’t just want to walk away. I couldn’t walk away. I was completely attracted to him, and he became the other part of my soul, I couldn’t chop myself in half and part from him. It would be impossible, and it would tear me up. He was my life—my heart—and without him I would slowly wither away and die. Without my parents, he was all that I had. My throat burned and I attempted to choke down my saliva but only managed to gag down air.

  “No,” I managed. “I’m coming with you.”

  Chris removed his hand from my shoulder and I backed against the car. He wouldn’t be leaving without me.

  “I went here when I was first turned. I think it would be best if you stayed here.” I’d never seen him so emotionless before—never. “Think it over carefully.”

  First my parents were taken away from me, the creators of my existence, and then Christopher who grew into my other half. He was the growth that was irrevocably attached to me. You can’t remove something that is meant to be there. My breaths came in short gasps and my heart pounded, I felt like I was going to faint. I probably looked like I was hyperventilating—for all I knew I was hyperventilating.

  “I’m coming with you,” I repeated.

  Chris gulped. “If you were smart, you would stay here and learn something before following me around like a dog.”

  My jaw dropped. Did he just say that?

  “I-I,” I stuttered, but stopped before I said anything else. I did my best not to let the tears fall from my eyes, they were right there waiting for even a tiny, little blink. I would not let it happen though. I shoved my thoughts to the back of my mind that told me to go with him. Every inch of me wanted to get right back into that car and go with him, but I forced myself to think about the bad things about that. I couldn’t fight the Gregottas—I thought Chris was foolish for even trying... foolish, but brave. I would need to learn to cope with being a werewolf and I would need to get on my feet, and since I would not be able to learn to cope with my parents, I would need someone. I couldn’t just rely on myself with this.

  Christopher could help me, I told myself. But I quickly vetoed that idea, he was going to fight the Gregottas, there was no way he could help me by the time we got there. My breathing increased, and my heart thudded painfully in my chest. Chris just stood there in front of me, watching me, waiting for my answer. I couldn’t give him an answer. I refused to give him an answer. I couldn’t decide something like that. Why did he build up a relationship with me if he knew we would have to break it off? He knew it was going to come to this.

  “Halle?” Chris questioned shoving his hands in his pockets. I drew in a deep breath attempting to calm myself. We must have been standing there for at least 15 minutes.

  “I,” I said with a shaking voice as I drew in a breath, “have,” I let out the breath, “to,” I drew in another breath, “stay,” I squeaked out in such a high pitch voice I sounded like an animal. That word didn’t want to come out. Why didn’t I say go? I want to go! I screamed in my mind.

  Chris moved in calm delicate motions, but his express was still severe. He was more serious than any other person I’d seen in my life and the sight killed me. I made the decision, but I wanted to go, I wanted to run into his arms and receive a hug from his strong arms, but I knew that would only make it harder to go.

  “There’s no turning back,” Chris mumbled taking the keys out of his pocket.

  I breathed out. I didn’t know what to say. I’ll come with you! My feet still refused to move. I didn’t respond for a few minutes, we both stood there staring into each others’ eyes, but that trance was broken when Chris began to walk around the other side of the vehicle towards the driver’s seat. Mentally, I stepped into the vehicle along with him. He slammed the door shut and slowly started up the engine of the vehicle. I saw him glance at me—but only for a brief moment. The car backed out of its previous parked space with expert skills, and headed out towards the long, winding dirt road beyond. The wheels spun kicking up dirt at me. Was he angry? Did he hate me for my decision? Good. It would be easier that way.

  Taking in another deep breath I let it out again and along with it my purse fell from the clutch of my hand onto the dirt covered ground below. My lower jaw hung loosely below my upper jaw, lik
e it was broken. I couldn’t close it. My arms felt like rubber and my entire body trembled.

  So this is reality.