See Me

  “Please tell me they can’t get women pregnant,” I whispered.

  McKale paused, too long.

  “Aye, they can.” He sounded respectfully sorry. “But it does no’ last beyond the early months.”

  Cassidy whimpered, covering her mouth, and angry fire raged through me.

  “McKale,” I said through gritted teeth. “Please find Rock and bring him here.”

  He pushed a hand through his dampened hair and nodded at me, looking pained.

  “Wait!” Cassidy’s hand shot out and grabbed his arm as he turned to go. “You’re not gonna tell him, are you?”

  He looked down on her with sad eyes. “Nay. If I did, he’d no’ come.”

  She watched him leave with her mouth agape. “He would still come.” She sounded childlike.

  “Cass—”

  “No!” She pulled away when I tried to touch her and went to her bed, sitting down and pulling up her knees. “McKale’s wrong. It’s not like that. Ronan loves me.”

  I curled my hands into tight fists. My sister could be pregnant with a baby that had no chance of survival. And I had a terrible feeling the only person Rock loved was Rock.

  We waited in silence. She stayed in bed and zoned out while I paced. It felt like forever before the guys came. Rock’s hair looked particularly big this morning and he wore a good-humored expression.

  “Wha’s the secret, then? Are we off on another grand adventure today, lasses?”

  “Oh, it’s grand alright,” I said.

  “Robyn, stop!” Cassidy jumped out of bed and went to Rock. He draped an arm over her shoulder and they gazed at one another.

  “Sorry,” she said to him. “It’s just that…”

  She looked down, not able to say it, and Rock absorbed the silence. He noted our serious faces, and lost the stupid grin on his own. His hand dropped from Cassidy’s shoulder. When he took a step away and her chin quivered, I trembled with anger.

  “Och. Ye should have warned her,” McKale told him.

  “It’s okay,” Cassidy said. “I’m not mad at you, Ronan.” She moved toward him, but he looked afraid.

  “I thought ye knew it was possible,” he said, eyes darting toward the exit, which was blocked by both McKale and myself.

  “Well, you thought wrong.” I worked hard to thaw the ice from my voice. “So, now’s the part where you comfort her and tell her you’ll be there for her.”

  Cassidy sent me a furious look. Rock reached out with uncertainty and laid a hand on Cassidy’s shoulder. When she leaned on him and began to cry into his chest, he put his arms awkwardly around her.

  “Och, shiteballs,” he said.

  Cassidy laughed at his funny-sounding use of her word before her tears tapered off and she wiped her eyes with the back of her hands.

  “Will ye be tellin’ yer folks?” he asked, seeming terrified at the prospect.

  “No way. If I told my mom she would tell my dad and he’d probably kill you.”

  His expression of terror expanded, and Cass managed a small giggle. “I won’t tell them, but I’m not good at keeping secrets. Maybe I’ll tell Mom when we’re back home.”

  Rock didn’t look reassured. He’d obviously had bad luck with fathers in the past. Imagine that.

  “Everything is okay,” she told him. “It’ll be okay.”

  Why was she comforting him? It was not okay.

  “Aye, Cassie-lassie.” His smile was nervous, but she beamed back at him anyway. I was shocked. She hated being called Cassie. She once chased me and gave me a wedgie when I said it.

  At least Rock seemed to be making an effort now, even though he appeared unaccustomed to doing so.

  “Um, so, Robyn and McKale are having their binding ceremony in five days,” she told him.

  “Truly?” He grinned, but not as wide as usual.

  “Perhaps I’ll see if me father can make an exception and allow the Clour to attend,” McKale said.

  “Aye, if ye can get the stubborn old man to agree, I’ll be there.”

  “Right.” McKale cleared his throat. “Well, we should get ye out of here before anyone sees ya.”

  Tension still filled the air when the boys got ready to leave. Cassidy kissed Rock, and he was out the door, out of sight, quicker than a pixie.

  McKale looked at my sister who stood there rubbing her arms. “Cass, if ye’d like I can have one of the women folk speak with ye. There’s several in the village who can advise ye what to expect. They’ll be discreet.”

  She swallowed and shook her head. My heart tightened at what she’d soon be going through.

  “No thanks,” she whispered. “I’m gonna take a bath now.”

  She left us, and I took McKale’s hand, leading him outside of the bungalow door.

  “Thank you,” I told him.

  He nodded. I didn’t let go of his hand. In fact I tightened my grip when he started to leave. “Wait, Kale.” My stomach turned as I thought about the previous night. “Nobody came to visit you last night, did they?” He didn’t have to ask whom I meant.

  “Nay. Why? What’s the matter?”

  “There was a pixie outside our room last night.”

  His jaw tensed and he stared out into the trees. “When she comes again, I will speak with her, and surely she’ll see reason.”

  I didn’t know about that. I loathed the idea of them speaking, but what more could we do? He bent and kissed my lips, too briefly. But he kept his face close to mine and I admired his light eyes.

  “Five days until our binding.” He spoke in a husky whisper.

  A thrill tore through me and I reached out to grip the doorframe. The way he said it sounded much more like a sexy promise than a mere statement. Anxious excitement pinged around inside me.

  “Five days,” I repeated.

  The moment he walked away my happiness evaporated as I entered my room and remembered what unnecessary heartache we now had to deal with.

  I paced the small room with my arms crossed. I knew I should have crushed Rock’s bits and pieces when I had the chance.

  I was so engrossed in my dark thoughts about my little sister’s predicament that I didn’t notice the round-bellied green creature crouched on the bedside table until it freaking waved at me, grinning evilly. I stumbled, biting back a scream and tripping over a suitcase. The pixie flew up in the air, laughing with that unnerving high-pitched cackle as I dove for the door and flung it open.

  “Robyn?” Cassidy called from the bathroom.

  “One second!” I managed to say as the thing flew for the doorway, kicking me on the side of the head on its way out. Ow. I’d have given anything for a can of Raid at that moment. I slammed the door and sat in front of it, leaning my head back.

  It was a spy. It had to be. No doubt, the pixie was going straight to his mistress to tell her everything he’d learned here this morning. Crap! How long had he been in our room and how’d he get in? And then I remembered the door bursting open during the night. Sneaky little bastard. He’d stayed still and quiet the whole time, hidden. The FFG would be proud of her little pet. I kicked the suitcase hard.

  “What is going on?” Cassidy shouted, annoyed now.

  “Oh, nothing much. Just found our freaky little pixie friend in our room.”

  Frantic splashing sounds came from the tub. “Ohmigawd, nuh-uh!”

  “Don’t worry, it’s gone now.”

  She stilled. “Are you sure? Come in here.”

  I stood and went to her, pulling the curtain aside and squatting on a small stool next to the tub. She was sitting up with a washcloth over her chest, and her knees pulled up in the cloudy water.

  I told her what happened and Cassidy proceeded to once again call the FFG every bad name in the book. She knew it gave me great joy when she did that.

  Cassidy ended her tirade, saying, “She needs to get a life and leave you alone.”

  We were both thoughtful for a few minutes until she broke the silence.

  “You kn
ow, McKale’s kind of cool.”

  “Yeah?” I grinned. “He needed to warm up, I guess.”

  “I’m glad he’s being good to you. I wish…”

  “I know, Cass.” She wished a lot of things, and so did I. We reached out for each other and rested our joined hands on the edge of the tub. She laid her cheek on her knees.

  “I’m scared.” Her voice hitched and a tear fell, sliding down her leg.

  “Sweet girl,” I whispered as my heart shattered. “I’m here. I’ll do anything I can.”

  “I keep thinking,” she said. “The Clour usually get humans pregnant, right? But I have magical blood. What if, you know, that makes it different? Maybe it’ll cancel out the curse and I won’t lose the baby.”

  I stared at her. I didn’t believe for a second that her having magical blood would somehow reverse the curse against Rock’s people. Entertaining such thoughts would only make it harder. Plus, the idea of Cassidy as a teen mom was frightening.

  “Don’t get your hopes up, chickadee, okay?”

  She nodded and closed her eyes, pressing out more tears. “I love you, Robyn.”

  BROGAN DECLARED IT A week of celebration in the village. The Shoe House was closed for business. Because of the feasting and constant excited bustle of the men, the women ironically worked overtime. They didn’t seem to mind, seeing how all of their men were in such fine spirits. There was an abundance of winking going on, and no female’s backside was safe from an onslaught of pinches, including mine. By the end of the first day I was certain a wager was going around to see which wee man could make me squeal the loudest.

  It wasn’t viewed as an act of disrespect. Even McKale thought it was funny. I think he enjoyed how each pinch caused my face to redden. I was unsure how to react to the jolly men’s attentions.

  “If someone back home pinched my butt they’d get slapped,” I explained to McKale.

  “Well, yer bum is very near their faces. The lads can’t help themselves.”

  “Ha-ha,” I dead-panned.

  Despite the festivity of the villagers, I couldn’t bring myself to share in the cheer.

  My mood was further dampened by several twinges of magic in the air throughout the day, though nobody in the village seemed to notice or care. Maybe they were used to it, but I didn’t think I ever would be.

  The surrounding busyness did keep my mind occupied for long stretches. While my parents and sister agreed to partake in some games, I helped in the kitchen. The women taught me to make fruit pastries from fresh wild berries. And as much as they loved the men, they’d smack any hands that reached for food before it was ready to serve.

  From the corner of my eye I saw a brown head poke around the doorframe. I looked up at Cassidy, who frantically waved me to her. She grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me around the corner where we were alone.

  “I got my period!” she said, beaming. She threw her arms around my neck and I hugged her around the waist. My lungs released the world’s largest and happiest exhale. Ah, sweet friggin’ relief! Finally, something went right.

  Without letting go of me, Cass said, “I’m sorry that I even told you I was late. I’ve been so out of whack, but I shouldn’t have worried you. This is your time and you have so much going on.”

  I held her tighter. “No, I’m glad you told me. Please don’t ever feel like you can’t come to me. I might… freak out a little because I worry, but I love you no matter what.”

  We released each other and Cass cast her eyes downward.

  “I’m going to find Rock tonight and tell him,” she said.

  I wanted to tell her to stay away from him, but they would have been wasted words. So instead I lamely said, “Okay, just… be careful.”

  “I will.” With a newfound lightness she left me, returning to the festivities. I shook my head and went back to the kitchens. I wished I could inject a dose of caution into that girl’s veins.

  When the last rack of pastries was cooling, the ladies eyed one another as they removed their smocks.

  Leilah smiled at me. “We’ve got something for ye, Robyn.”

  “You do?” My mouth lifted in return, wondering what they were up to.

  “Aye, we do. All of us women folk, that is. Let me fetch yer sister and mum. Then we’ll show ya.”

  I washed berry juice from my hands and patted flour from my shirt until Leilah returned with Cassidy and Mom, both grinning. So, they were in on it, too. Hm. The group of women led me down into the female cottages. Other women saw us going, and joined along the way. Leilah and Rachelle went into one of the rooms and came back out, gingerly holding a long swath of lavender silk across their arms. I sucked in a breath and grabbed my mother’s hand.

  The village women motioned to Cassidy, who took the gown and held it up for me to see.

  “We loaned them your sundress to use for measurements,” Mom said. “It’s a binding gown.”

  The dress was unlike anything I would have chosen for myself, and yet, it was perfection. I examined each detail. The neck was a deep scoop, which rounded up over the shoulders with dainty short sleeves. It had an empire waist that flowed to the ground. My favorite part was the coloring. They’d specially dyed it so the top was lavender, and it gradually darkened as it lowered, becoming a deep purple at the bottom. The colors reminded me of a Hollyhock. I wanted nothing more than to have McKale see me in this dress.

  “You made this?” I asked, getting choked up as I looked around at the twenty or so expectant faces.

  “Aye. We hope ye will not mind that it’s not entirely traditional,” Leilah explained, appearing worried. “Customarily the sleeves are longer, but we were inspired by the style of a few pieces the two of ye gals often wear.”

  “I love it,” I said, reaching out to touch the fabric. It was as soft as it looked. I gathered it in my hands and held it up to myself. There were murmurs and affirmative nods. Mom and Cass moved together to get a good view.

  “Och, the coloring is spot on, just as I told ye lasses,” boasted the oldest woman, the one who’d made me the apron. I leaned down and kissed her cheek. Before I could straighten again she grasped my face and kissed one of my cheeks, and then the other.

  “Bless ye, child,” she said.

  Handing the dress back to a tearful Cassidy, I went around and thanked each woman, giving hugs and receiving kisses, ending with Mom, then my sister who opted to give me a bear hug. The women clapped as Cass and I rocked back and forth, laughing. I liked to think that it helped Cassidy and Mom as much as it helped me, knowing I’d been accepted by the women of the clan. It was one less thing they had to worry about when it was time to leave me.

  Early dusk was upon us by the time we brought my lovely gown to my room and headed for the clearing. Our large group of females made quite an entrance. You would have thought we were celebrities the way the men hooted and carried on as we walked down. Some of the women curtsied or twirled and we all laughed, feeling punchy.

  McKale approached me, fiddle in hand.

  “I fancy playing a few songs, if ye don’t mind.”

  Good gosh, was the boy asking my permission? I reached up and kissed him, not letting his lips go until I heard people cheering.

  “Of course I don’t mind. I love hearing you play. I’ll come sit near you.”

  He gave a bashful grin at the compliment and took my hand, leading me to the table nearest the musicians. My family followed and sat with me. We clapped to the tempo as the music began, and though all seemed well on the surface I couldn’t fully let loose and rejoice. The closer I grew to McKale, and the nearer our binding date came, the more I felt a looming threat from the FFG.

  The first song ended, and a murmur went through the crowd. I sat up straighter, on alert. I felt my family do the same. Drawn-out voices sounded from down in the field. I stood to look, heart sprinting. Movement caught my eye as a row of men exited the trees, all in a line with their arms draped around one another’s shoulders. It was the Clourichaun boy
s, singing in sloshy voices, stumbling in a zig-zag line through the tall grass—eight regular sized boys and four little men ambling along. They seemed so young. I didn’t think the Clour lived lifestyles that allowed them to reach ripe old ages.

  McKale had gained special permission for them to attend the binding ceremony, but Brogan did not look happy about seeing them so soon. He crossed his arms over his beard and shook his head, mumbling about how he’d boot the lot of ‘em if they didn’t behave themselves. Brogan then ordered the musicians to take up their instruments. A song promptly began.

  I glanced at Cassidy who was craning her neck for a view of Rock. McKale watched me, fiddle to his chin. His hands moved over the strings, but his eyes questioned if everything was all right. I nodded.

  The Clour boys made it to the clearing and broke away from one another. They must have been holding each other up before that because they all went sprawling and rolling when they let go and kicking their feet in the air.

  Women clucked their tongues or giggled. Some of the Chaun boys laughed and greeted the Clour, helping them to their feet while the older men harrumphed with disapproval.

  Cassidy’s eyes were bright. I knew she was dying to give Rock the happy news. “I’m just gonna go say hi,” Cassidy said to our parents. Mom pursed her lips together.

  “I don’t think that’s such a good idea,” Dad told her.

  I knew she would go no matter what, and I didn’t want a scene.

  “I’ll go with her,” I said, taking her hand. “We’ll come right back.”

  Dad glared in Rock’s direction, and I could see why.

  Rock could barely stand. His ankles kept bending under his weight. Cassidy and I stood and moved closer, watching as Keefe, the soccer guy, greeted Rock, pulling back his hand and flapping it in front of his nose.

  “Och, Rock! Ye stink of Farmer Teague’s wife, ye do! Was she boiling another batch of her death-by-roses perfume, then?”

  You’ve got to be kidding me.

  Laughter ensued, and Rock half-grinned. Other guys leaned in to take whiffs and make faces. Cassidy’s steps faltered and her clammy hand tightened on mine. I felt her eyes stray to me but I couldn’t take mine off Rock. We were close to them now. I prayed the guys were only joking. But as we pulled up to the edge of the group an unmistakable, strong flowered perfume scented the air.