Alone

  Matt said in a loud whisper, "Roy, are you okay?"

  I dropped to my knees and cowered on the ground.

  Matt gasped, "Roy, what's wrong with you."

  My heart was beating so fast I was afraid I might be the next dead body in the woods. I had always thought of myself as being strong, but at that moment all my resolve to be fearless, crumbled. I felt defeated by the phenomena in my life. Matt leaned over me, but I closed off his words. I was as still as the old man had been.

  Chapter 9: Not Defeated

  I opened my eyes the next morning and stared at the ceiling for awhile and then looked out the window across from my bed. After that, I studied my favorite comic book hero posters tacked on my walls: Amazing Man, Quantum, and Firelight. Although it was silly, the posters again gave me courage, purpose, and hope. They made me feel that no matter the obstacle or challenge, there was always hope. As I lay there pondering the challenges my action heroes faced, I thought about the strange events in my own life. Why?

  I squeezed my eyes tight. I needed to find the strength and determination of my heroes. My gut instinct told me there would be more unexplained encounters and I needed to face those happenings without fear. Fear only resulted in more fear.

  As I lay there deep in thought my father came into my room. "Roy, we're worried about you."

  "Dad, about last night…" I hesitated.

  Dad said, "I was terrified when Matt ran to the house and told us something was wrong with you. I followed him to where you sat on the ground. You kept mumbling some strange stuff, and between the two of us, we helped you home. What's going on, Roy?"

  "Honestly, I don't know, Dad. Would you mind if I just stayed in my room today? I need some time alone to think."

  "You know, Roy, I was your age once and I know how active a young man's imagination can be."

  "What do you mean?"

  "Well, Matt tells me you're seeing things that others can't."

  "I think I've been a little stressed lately. Really, I'm fine. I just need to be alone."

  "Okay son, I'll leave you alone, but call me if you want to talk."

  After my dad left the room and closed the door, I replayed the events from the previous night over and over. Why had that old man been strangled? Why had he been guarding the gymnasium door? How was it that I was in the forest one minute and then suddenly sitting back on the rock by the pond the next? Who moved the body? There were so many unanswered questions.

  The rest of the day I stayed in my room reading comic books and trying to make sense of all the strange occurrences over the past few years. I found no answers. My sister brought me Pop Tarts for breakfast and a sandwich for lunch.

  By evening I became restless and hungry and ventured to the living room where my dad, mom, and sister lounged around the television.

  My mom muted the sound. "Roy, how are you feeling? I wanted to check on you today, but your father said I should leave you alone."

  "I'm feeling a lot better," I replied, as I sat on the edge of the couch.

  Serena asked, "What's been going on with you lately? Why are you acting so strange?"

  "I think I've just been stressed thinking about graduation. You know, wondering what I'm going to do with the rest of my life."

  In my mind, however, I knew that had nothing to do with it, and in my heart, I knew these three people were hiding something.

  My mom interjected, "Those are normal feelings for a man your age."

  My father then started telling me stories about when he was a teenager and the experiences he'd had. I knew he was making up events to keep me from searching for the truth. I listened to everything he said and acted the part of the obedient son, but I was now determined to discover the truth that would unravel the secrets and unexplained events I'd been bombarded with. I wished I'd kept the note from the stranger as evidence.

  Chapter 10: First Love

  A few years passed with only occasional weird happenings that I still found no explanations for. When I was twenty-one, I was working for McDuff's as a stock clerk during the day. I'd been hired right out of high school after Matt's mom put in a good word for me. I rarely saw Mrs. Crimsley now because she always worked the night shift and Matt and I didn't hang out as much.

  Between work and watching over my mother who had become ill with leukemia, I was always busy. My mom had started getting sick right after I graduated from high school. My father often called in sick to his job because Mom had painful days with the disease. Money was always tight because of all her medical expenses. I gave the majority of my paycheck to my father to help with bills.

  Serena didn't talk much after Mom got sick. She just buried her nose in books most of the day. I had wanted to graduate high school and travel far away to college but that dream got crushed with Mom's disease. I resigned myself to being stuck working at McDuff's and not being able to pursue my dreams.

  Recently, my father had gotten upset after talking to Mom's doctor. The doctor had told him that she only had a few months to live, so Dad wanted to spend as much time with her as possible. As for me, I felt guilty because I wasn't as emotionally upset about my mother dying as my father and sister were. I'd always felt guilty that I didn't have a stronger bond with my parents.

  One morning when I was leaving for work, my father grabbed my hand as I started out the front door. He pulled me into a tight hug and had tears rolling down his cheeks. "Roy, son, I'm afraid."

  I figured he was talking about losing my mother.

  He pulled me tighter and I could feel his body quaking. "Roy, you have a gift."

  I jerked back to stare into his eyes. His arms were still shaking and he looked frightened. I had never seen my father in this condition.

  "What do you mean?" I asked.

  "Never mind, it's nothing," he replied, staring beyond my shoulder.

  Confused, I left the house and headed to the trail leading to town.

  I turned around once to see my father, slump-shouldered, reenter the house. While I walked toward town I couldn't stop thinking about what he'd said. Was it just the ramblings of a sorrowful man? Did it have anything to do with the crazy events that had happened in my life?

  Later that day while stocking the milk shelves from inside the refrigerator, I noticed a woman about my age selecting a carton. She was gorgeous and I had never seen her around town. I stopped stocking and rushed to the sales floor. It wasn't often a woman that stunning walked into McDuff's. I ran my hands through my hair to straighten it. The woman was now browsing the yogurt section. Her dark brown hair, with a hint of blond highlights, fell past her shoulders, and she wore practically no makeup. She was dressed in a short black skirt and a crisply pressed white blouse. She was definitely high class.

  She turned and we made eye contact. She said in a slightly husky voice, "Excuse me, do you work here?"

  She had my heart pumping so fast all I could say was, "Uh, yeah."

  "Do you carry any lemon yogurt?"

  "Uh, no, everything we have is displayed."

  "Do you live around here?" she asked sweetly.

  I couldn't believe she was actually asking me that question. "Yes, I live outside of town." I pointed in the direction of my house.

  "Well, I just moved here with my parents from Fort Carter and I don't know anyone. We moved across from the high school."

  I replied, "I've always lived here and never been anywhere other than Fairview and Fort Carter." After I said the words, I wanted to kick myself for sounding so boring.

  "Really? Wow, that's crazy. What's your name?"

  "Roy Clawson."

  "Hi Roy, I'm Taylor Bradshaw. It's nice to meet you." She held her hand out for me to shake.

  I was embarrassed because my palm was so sweaty I had to wipe it on my apron before clasping her soft one.

  "What do you do for fun around here, Roy?"

  "There's not much to do except fish at Sawyer Lake or go to Lucy's Cafe for a milkshake. She makes great ones."


  "I like milkshakes. Maybe we could go to Lucy's together."

  Again, I couldn't believe my ears. "Sure, I'd love that!"

  "Well, I better get going. It was nice meeting you, Roy. I'll see you around."

  "Nice meeting you too, Taylor." My heart was hammering. Gorgeous women never invited themselves to have a milkshake with me. For the rest of the day I was on cloud nine. Everyone at work kept asking me why I was grinning and I told them it was because I'd met a beautiful woman.

  Chapter 11: Mother

  After I got home that evening I noticed my father was kneeling beside my mother's bed holding her hand.

  "Dad, is everything okay?"

  "Your mother's not doing well, son."

  I didn't know what to say, so I returned to the living room and sat in the recliner. Serena was sitting on the couch. She just stared at me angrily.

  "What?" I asked.

  "You know Mom's dying and you don't even seem to care."

  "What do you mean I don't care?"

  "You're the only one who hasn't cried, Roy."

  "Serena, I deal with things in my own way. I'm sorry you don't understand."

  Serena jumped up and stormed from the room, mumbling under her breath. A few minutes later, my dad came into the living room. He looked exhausted and sad. He said, "Roy, come with me."

  He motioned for me to follow him as he walked onto the porch and then down the steps. We headed to the rear of the house and then toward the woods. I glanced back to see Serena staring at us from the window of my parents' room. We entered the woods and he kept looking all around.

  I followed my dad deep into the forest. Finally, he stopped and sat on a tree stump. I sat on a log nearby. He was quiet for a long time, and then he said, "Roy, what I want to talk to you about is very complicated."

  "What do you mean?" My heart pounded. Was I finally going to receive answers to the mysteries in my life?

  "There's something your mother wants you to know–"

  Although the sound was faint, we were interrupted by screams coming from the house. My father jumped up and ran toward home. I was close behind him. The closer we got to the house the more I recognized that horrible stench.

  Serena was in the front yard screaming.

  Dad sounded panicked when he demanded, "Serena what's happened?"

  She ran and threw her arms around Dad. "He killed her, Daddy! He killed her!"

  My father ran into the house and I ran in behind him. The smell and Serena's terror had the hair on my arms standing up. Dad raced to Mom's bedside. She was facing away from us. He turned to me and ordered, "Roy, leave right now!"

  I tried to look past him for a better view, but he blocked me. He pointed to the door and repeated, "Leave, now!"

  When I didn't move, he stalked forward and pushed me into the hallway and then quickly closed the door. I heard him turn the lock.

  For several minutes I just stood in the hallway wondering what the heck was going on. Since I didn't know what to do, I returned to the living room where Serena was sprawled on the couch crying her eyes out.

  "Serena what happened?"

  My sister didn't answer me.

  "Serena, what happened?" I asked more forcefully.

  She lifted tearful eyes and said, "You did this!"

  Suddenly, everything was just too overwhelming—my father's secrecy, my sister's accusations, my mother's illness—and I knew I had to have some breathing space. Confused and hurt, I walked outside and paced. After that I just sat on the porch and waited.

  At least an hour passed before my father opened the front door. With his head hanging, he said, "She's gone, Roy. Your mother is gone."

  Everything around me seemed surreal. I knew by my father's expression that my mother was dead, but I couldn't understand why Serena had said he killed her, and then that I was to blame.

  My father must have already called Mr. Jester, the funeral director, because he arrived with his hearse shortly thereafter. I wanted to see my mom's body before he removed her from the house, but Mr. Jester said it wasn't a good idea and I should wait for the funeral. I refused and insisted on seeing her. He replied that a dead body doesn't look the same as a living person.

  I shouted, "I know what a dead body looks like. I've seen one before." I pushed past him into the bedroom. My mother lay pale and lifeless and I was plagued with guilt because I didn't seem to feel the same sadness as my father and sister. I wasn't suffering their deep emotions.

  I stared at her lifeless body thinking about the dead man in the forest. A blanket reached to her chin and I felt compelled to uncover her.

  I started to pull the blanket down, but Mr. Jester placed his hand over mine. "You don't want to see anything else."

  I pushed him away and jerked the blanket back. My mom's neck appeared to be okay, but there were bruises on her arms. "What's this?" I pointed to the bruises.

  Mr. Jester didn't respond.

  I practically shouted, "I demand to know how she got those bruises!"

  He still didn't respond.

  I stormed out of the bedroom looking for my father. He was standing near the old oak wiping his eyes.

  "How did Mom get bruised and what did Serena mean when she said he killed her?"

  My father broke down weeping. He was so upset he couldn't talk. I'd had enough of everyone's charade and returned to the house to call the sheriff. When Sheriff Tanner arrived I showed him the bruises and told him what Serena had said. He said he would investigate and that he wanted to talk to my father and sister alone.

  For over an hour they stayed in the bedroom with my dead mother. Afterward, the sheriff told Mr. Jester to remove the body.

  Before my mother was removed from the house, my father leaned over to hug her and continued weeping. I couldn't stand it any longer and walked outside to lean against the oak while her body was moved into the hearse. Serena sat in a chair on the porch with her face buried in her hands.

  While I watched, I wondered what my father had wanted to tell me in the woods. Had my mother's death stopped him from revealing their secrets? Had he wanted to go into the forest because someone was watching us?

  Questions without answers kept circling in my mind. My father came and stood next to me, putting his arm around my shoulders.

  I said, "Dad, why does death always have such a strong odor?"

  He said quietly, "I don't smell anything."

  Serena walked over and put her arms around Dad. The three of us stood close to each other in disbelief that Mom was actually gone.

  Sheriff Tanner joined us. He said, "Roger, according to Mr. Jester, it looks like your wife died of cancer and I don't see anything unusual about the bruises on her arms. As for what Serena said, she admitted to talking crazy because of her grief."

  "What!" I shouted.

  "Roy, relax. I'll take care of it," my father said evenly. He said to the sheriff, "So you don't think there was any foul play involved?"

  "No. I checked your house and didn't see any signs of unlawful entry, and after conferring with Mr. Jester, the way I see it, she self-inflicted her bruising. That's not uncommon when someone is in great agony."

  I couldn't believe such nonsense was coming from Sheriff Tanner's mouth. My mother would never harm herself. I was shocked when my father didn't stand up to him.

  Chapter 12: Taylor

  In my heart, I knew my mother had been murdered and Sheriff Tanner was covering it up. My father had tried to tell me something in the forest that my mother wanted me to know, and she'd suddenly died.

  I approached my father later and questioned him about what he had wanted to say in the woods.

  "It was nothing, son. I just needed to leave the house for awhile."

  I knew he was lying. He was hiding something.

  The day after my mother died, I walked to the funeral home to air my head out and think about the best way to investigate her murder. The mortuary was located at the farthest end of town. When I arrived, I was surpris
ed that I didn't smell death. Stopping at the reception desk I saw a small bell and rang it. Mr. Jester appeared.

  "Mr. Clawson, how are you doing today? I'm terribly sorry about your mother."

  "Thanks, but I was wondering if I could see her again."

  "I'm sorry, son, but she was cremated this morning."

  I was shocked. "Who gave you permission to cremate her?"

  "Your father, of course. He said it was her wish. Per your father's instructions she will be in an urn at the funeral."

  "Why would you cremate her when she was possibly murdered? Don't we have to do an autopsy?"

  "Roy, Sheriff Tanner assured us that she died of natural causes."

  "Sheriff Tanner? Are you serious? Since when does the Sheriff make coroner decisions? Shouldn't Fort Carter's Coroner's Office have been called to investigate?"

  "I understand you're upset Roy, but I can't undo what has been done, and the police report says there was no foul play."

  Mr. Jester's words angered me and I rushed from the building. I ran back toward town and ended up near the high school. I slumped against a tree. My mind swirled with pictures of my mother's strange bruising, but there was nothing I could do to prove my belief that she had been murdered. I wished I had someone to share my suspicion with instead of being alone. I was so angry.

  Across and down the street, I saw Taylor, the girl I had met at McDuff's, step onto her porch. I remembered that she said she was living near the high school. She stepped off her porch carrying a water pot. She was wearing earphones and started dancing around her yard while watering potted plants. I didn't want to seem overanxious to talk with her, so I decided I would circle to the back of the high school and come out farther down the street. Then I would walk past her house pretending I had no idea she lived there. As I ran, I licked my fingers and slicked my hair back.

  My heart was pounding as I approached her house. I glanced around to see if anyone was watching. When I looked at the school, I saw someone leaning against the tree I had just been chilling under.

  It looked like me.

  I blinked to clear my eyes. I was still a good distance from Taylor's house and paused behind some hedges to further investigate the person under the tree. He had his head down. His clothes were the same as what I was wearing. I moved my gaze around the high school and saw a man standing beside the corner of the building. He was dressed entirely in black.