The Second Chance
**********
“My, don’t you seem distracted,” Jamie Wiley said with her exaggerated Southern accent. Percy knew she did it for effect because she thought it made her seem younger. Usually he didn’t care about the forced accent, but today it annoyed him.
Percy kissed his older sister on the cheek before taking his seat across from her. “Good to see you too, Sis,” he murmured with a sardonic smile.
“How was your little romantic getaway with Lena? I haven’t heard from either of you since you got back last Monday, so I figured you must have been pretty busy, if you know what I mean,” Jamie said with a suggestive little eyebrow raise.
“Lena broke up with me, and if you ever try to fix me up with one of your immature, racist friends again, I’ll disown you,” Percy said with a ferocious scowl.
“What on Earth happened?” Jamie demanded with her perfect blond brows furrowed in concern.
“It’s a long story,” Percy hedged.
“So shorten it.”
Percy really didn’t want to have to answer a barrage of meddlesome questions, and his older sister was nothing if not meddlesome when it came to his love life. Between his sister and his mother, he’d had more women thrown in his path than he could handle in the last few years. He weighed the consequences of telling her to mind her own business, but common sense won in the end. Telling his sister to mind her own business was the surest way to make her dig in her heels and meddle even more. “I ran into Anna,” he said. He knew no additional information was needed. Jamie and Anna had clashed multiple times in the past, and Jamie had been nothing short of euphoric when Anna finally left.
“Anna Mae Jenkins?” Jamie asked with a huge gulp.
“She’s the only Anna I’ve ever been in a relationship with.”
“What happened?”
“I noticed her in the restaurant where Lena and I were having dinner. She got up to leave, and I followed her out the door. I chased her down, convinced her to spend the day with me, we made love, and then we said goodbye all over again.”
Jamie blinked a couple of times; he’d never been that candid with her before. “Did anything else happen?” she asked.
“A lot happened, but that was the gist of it.”
Percy wasn’t sure, but he thought he detected relief in his sister’s expression.
“You’re not going to see her again, are you?”
“I don’t know. She’s a Canadian citizen now, and she basically told me we couldn’t be together, so the chances are pretty slim.”
“Doesn’t her family still live here in Florida? Did she tell you anything about what she was doing all the way up there?”
“Yes her family still lives here, and no she didn’t tell me what she does up in Canada. The important thing was that she told me she still loves me, and that’s got to be worth something. I’m just not sure what at the moment.”
Jamie put her head in her hands and said, “Dear Jesus… I recognize that tone. You’re going to see her again, aren’t you?”
Percy thought again about the way he and Anna had said goodbye. Nothing about that morning seemed right to him, from the way she’d opened her eyes with reservations, to the sad look on her face as she’d told him to leave. Deep inside Percy knew with unquestionable certainty that she hadn’t wanted to say goodbye to him at all. He felt it all the way to the core of his being, and that’s why he couldn’t stop thinking about that moment. The look in her eyes had been replaying in his mind almost continuously for the past week and a half. Maybe if she hadn’t told him that she’d always love him he would have given up hope by now. As it was, that one little ember left inside him for almost five years had been sparked to life by their brief encounter, and it blazed too bright for him to let her go again so easily.
“Yes, I am going to see her again,” Percy said, only just coming to that startling realization as the words left his mouth. She’d said she was happier in Canada, not that she was happier without him. Once that thought entered his brain, his heart began to beat painful thuds inside his chest. “I’m going to find out where she lives and fly back to Canada. I’m going to tell her that she wouldn’t have to move back to the U.S. for us to be together.”
Jamie sat forward and said, “Percy, you need to take a few days to rethink this. The only reason you’re still so hung up on Anna is because she left you. If she had stayed any longer, you would have eventually broken up with her. She was way too serious for you, always going on about social justice and equality like it was your responsibility to change the way the world works or to go back and change how it’s always been. I say let her stay in Canada where she can keep cool, if that’s even possible. She wasn’t worth all the work it would have taken to keep her.”
“Jamie, you just don’t get it. I was the one who was wrong. She told me that it was hurting her to know that I went to work as a corporate lawyer for a company that was taking a lot of heat for systematically using discriminatory hiring practices. And after I’d worked there for a few months, it was obvious to me that these practices were ongoing and even more egregious than anyone on the outside knew. If it hadn’t been for Dad’s connections with the CEO and the board, I never would have been privy to the truth after just a few months on the job. I talked to Anna about it, and she thought I should quit, but I didn’t. I stayed because Dad helped me get that job, and five hundred thousand dollar a year salaries don’t just fall in your lap after only three years of experience. Basically, I was willing to compromise my principles for money, and Anna was deeply hurt by that. I just wish I had been mature enough to do the right thing when I’d had the chance,” Percy explained in the face of his sister’s skeptical stare.
“I’ve already heard that little speech about how wrong you were, Percy. Nothing you’ve told me changes the fact that Anna was difficult to be around,” Jamie hissed in a furious whisper.
“Maybe she was difficult for you to be around, because she didn’t appreciate the way you treated her. For Pete’s sake, Jamie, you actually called her colored the first time you met her! Even I was shocked by that one. Did you expect her to simper and bow down to you just because you smiled and crooked your damn finger at her a few times? She’s not a stupid little dog. She’s a human with valid thoughts and feelings that are just as important and coherent as yours.”
“I called her colored one time. Hell, I didn’t know it was offensive! And I never did it again, did I? But did she let it go? No, she didn’t. No matter how you slice it, that woman was difficult, and you’re better off without her. Everybody thinks so, not just me. We’ve never understood why you ever took up with that too big for her britches, little-”
“Little what?” Percy interrupted. “Maybe you and Mom only got to see her defensive side because your snarky attitudes brought out the worst in her, but she was never anything but wonderful to me. She was the most stimulating and amazing person I’ve ever met in my life, and I’m glad I met her when I was still in college, because I wouldn’t be the man I am today if it wasn’t for her. I shudder to think that I could have ended up as selfish and bigoted as the rest of the family if I hadn’t fallen in love with her. I was the best version of myself when I was with her, and since she left I’ve become an even better person because of seeds she planted. My understanding of the world and my place in it has certainly improved because of my time with Anna. I never did tell you and Mom exactly how I felt about her, because I didn’t want to deal with the speeches about my family obligation to marry someone you two would approve of, someone with white skin and a pure pedigree complete with confederate ancestors. I wanted to marry her. I bought her a ring a couple of months before she left, and I was waiting for the right time to give it to her… she was the love of my life, but I wasn’t strong enough to do the right thing and hold onto her back then. I’ve regretted it ever since.”
“Percy, listen to yourself. It’s been five years. You co
uldn’t possibly feel the same.”
“If we’d had this conversation before I saw her again, I would have agreed with you. But I have to admit that when I saw her again it was like all the time we’d spent apart didn’t really matter all that much. I know you think it sounds stupid or even just plain crazy, but that’s how I felt.”
“Percy…”
“Nothing you or Mom can say is going to convince me I’m wrong this time. As soon as things settle down some at work, I’m going back to Canada and I’m going to tell her how I feel.”
Jamie didn’t say anything else for almost a full minute. She sat back in her chair with a subdued look and stared into her sweet iced tea. “Did she tell you about everything that happened the year she left?” she asked in an uncharacteristically hesitant tone.
“Not much happened that year. She left in January; the year hadn’t really started yet,” Percy said with a snort.
“So, she didn’t mention the fact that she came back in August?” Jamie bit her lip as she waited for his response.
“No, and apparently neither did you.”
“Percy, keep in mind how badly she hurt you. It’s not like you two had a break-up; she just up and left you with no warning… I couldn’t let her hurt you again when you were just starting to move on with your life.”
“Jamie, what did you do? And don’t bother trying to sugarcoat it, because I’m going to ask Anna about her little visit too.”
“Do you remember that nice girl Claire, the one I set you up with right after Anna left?” Jamie began with a sigh.
“Yes,” Percy answered. “What about her?”
“I think you were out on your third or fourth date with her when Anna showed up in town looking for you. You weren’t at your apartment and you didn’t answer your cell, so she called me. I told her to meet me at that coffee shop downtown that used to be across the street from that restaurant you and Claire were at that night. When I saw her, I asked what she wanted, but she wouldn’t say. All she’d tell me was that she needed to talk to you about something private. We sat there and argued back and forth for a while, and then when I saw you and Claire leaving the restaurant, I pointed and said, ‘There he is, Sugar. Now’s your chance to talk to him.’ She just sat there and stared, so I told her that you’d moved on and you were happy, and that you and Claire had been together for a while and it was getting pretty serious. Looking back on it, I can see how you might misconstrue my actions as cruel, but I had your best interest at heart. After you and Claire were out of sight, Anna jumped up and took off without another word.
“The next morning, I went over to your apartment to make sure she hadn’t bothered you, and I happened to see her sitting across the street in a rental car. She tried to lie and say she hadn’t been there all night, but then she turned right around and told me that you didn’t come home that night. Now, how would she know that unless she’d been there all night? She was obviously stalking you, so I told her to get lost. I might have gotten a little upset and said some things I regret, but I had a good reason. If she was sitting there all night, she was obviously disturbed. Right after I finished telling her to scram, I happened to glance down, and I noticed that she looked a little round in the middle. I asked her if she was pregnant, and she said that’s what she wanted to talk to you about. I knew you didn’t need that kind of stress in your life, especially not at that time, when things were going so good with Claire. I got in the car with her, and I was able to convince her that it would be incredibly selfish to ask you to pay child support for a baby you didn’t even want, especially when you were with someone so much better for you. I think she must have been broke, and couldn’t afford to take care of it on her own, because she started crying. I wrote her a check to help out with expenses, and she left. I never received a thank you note, but I assumed she was able to get it taken care of since she never did come begging you for child support.”
By the end of Jamie’s speech, Percy was too angry to look at his sister for even one second longer, but he had one question that needed an answer. “When you say ‘take care of it,’ what exactly do you mean?” he asked with barely restrained fury.
“An abortion,” Jamie admitted with an uncomfortable swallow. “I’m sure I gave her more than enough to cover one.”
Once he had his answer, Percy got up and walked out of the restaurant without another word.