Days Of St Croix

Thirteen

  "Fuck! I am not having any luck tonight!" Jas cursed as he pushed against his window. It was shut and locked from the inside. He was certain he had left it open. He was crouched against the wall, with a three-story drop below him and just a narrow ledge to stand on. He pressed the window one more time. It was definitely stuck. He wasn't getting back in that way.

  He carefully stood up straight and reached up to the eaves of the roof. A wide steel rain gutter extended along the edge, and it had supported his weight when he had lowered himself down from on top of the roof a moment before. Pulling himself back up would prove more challenging, but he needed to get over to the other side of the building. Brand's room was opposite his; he would be able to let Jas in.

  Jas wrapped his fingers tight around the lip of the gutter and braced himself. Then he hopped up off the ledge and heaved with his arms. His adrenaline must have been pumping, because he managed to get himself up to chest height, like he was doing a pull-up. He paused, then swung his right leg up and onto the shallow-pitched roof. With half his body now up on the roof, he carefully rolled over onto his back, and finally let go of the gutter. He was up.

  He lay still for a moment and looked up at the stars. They seemed unusually bright as he lay panting. He wasn't sleepy, just physically tired, and the long ago worn-off drinks from earlier at the pub and the hotel had started to give him a headache.

  He thought about Paige. He had left her standing there in her underwear, so sexy, and she had wanted him. He was used to a fairly easy time with girls; most found his boyish Ralph Lauren model looks adorable, his easy charm irresistible. But Paige had been different. She seemed to have a will of her own. She had a personality which elevated her above all the girls he had been interested in before. So why had he left her standing there? What was it about Mills that had made him feel so guilty being with Paige?

  They had gotten together during the last few weeks of Freshman year. Mills had been Tibby's friend, and Jas had found Tibby's company very easy, although he hadn't ever thought about trying to date her. Brand was obsessed with her, and Jas knew better than to get in the way of that. Still, the four of them had spent a lot of time hanging out together in the warm summer days before the end of term, and it had eventually just happened between Jas and Mills. She was the sort of girl Jas usually went for: refined, intelligent, and obviously very hot.

  And now she was even hotter. Jas was blown away by it when he saw her again after summer vacation. She seemed fuller, more present, still slim but more womanly than the girl he had known a few months before. She still hit the right switches in him, but now Paige had come into the picture and thrown everything into chaos. Most guys, he knew, would probably have chosen Mills over Paige. Mills was more classically beautiful, and she had that magnetic, erotic quality that few girls have. Most guys, if they met Mills and Paige together at the same time, would have fallen for Mills in a second. But Mills wasn't new to Jas anymore. Paige still was. Was that it? Was that the problem?

  He wasn't sure if it was. As he scanned the sky and took in the stars and satellites, the enormous emptiness of the universe, a new wave of affection for Mills came over him. He couldn't explain it, maybe it was a huge sense of loneliness, but suddenly she seemed like the obvious choice. What on earth was he doing messing around with Paige? She was a blip, a meaningless hiccup in his developing relationship with his true girl, Mills.

  Jas sighed and sat up. The roof of the boys dorm was not a good place to fall asleep thinking about the complexity of his relationships. He needed to get back inside. There were only a few hours left before the breakfast bell, and Jas was starting to miss his bed.

  Brand sat on the edge of his bed and pushed his sweat-damp hair back with his hands. What a fucking dream! He wasn't sure if he was exhilarated or terrified, but he had woken up with Tibby's name on his lips and the sound of her laughter in his ears and he felt different. He got up to get a drink of water from the bathroom when he heard a scuffling sound outside his window, followed by a light knock. He went over and pulled back the curtain. Jas's grinning face was staring back at him.

  "Jesus! What the hell, Jas?" He said quietly as he opened the window and stepped aside, allowing Jas to enter.

  "Thanks buddy." Jas hopped down from the windowsill and breathed a sigh of relief. He was finally back inside. He looked at Brand's face. It was pale and looked damp and clammy. 

  "Wow, you look like shit. Bad dream?"

  "Thanks a lot. Actually, I had a fantastic dream."

  "Oh yes?"

  "Yeah. And that's not all. Tibby and I are going to be together. I know that now. We're made for each other."

  "That's great! How do you know?"

  "It's about trust, Jas. It's all about trust."