On the Edge

  Blue’s stomach rolled like he’d been caught in the surf. Hindsight? Bad idea to wade in.

  What the hell did Maddy think of him after all this?

  “It sounds like Blue knew you well, but how well did you know him?” Maddy leaned forward. “What dreams does he have for the future? Where does he want to be in five years?”

  Jenny blinked. “Ahh…”

  Maddy didn’t leave her hanging. “Would you be willing to take Blue’s direction when it comes to matchmaking?”

  “I’d like to think he knows exactly what I need.” Recovering, Jenny practically purred an invitation.

  If Blue hadn’t spent a week or so in Jenny’s bed, he’d be asking himself if she was for real. She was like a Playmate fantasy. Unfortunately, the insecurities of her youth were about as large as her sex drive. She needed constant reassurance that she looked pretty, that she’d worn the right shoes, that she’d pleased him in bed.

  Maddy paused the camera, reclaimed the microphone from Jenny, and thanked her for coming in.

  “She’s living in her own reality,” Maddy said after Jenny left. “But the show can always use a bit of the crazy. Hop on over here and give me your perspective.”

  Blue wanted nothing more to do with Jenny. “Why? You seemed to nail her.”

  “That’s a poor choice of words.” Maddy took Blue’s arm in that no-nonsense, Sunday schoolteacher way of hers that still managed to turn him on.

  When Maddy was ready, Blue cut right to the point. “Jenny Quick is Playboy Bunny hot. She’s been invited to the mansion a couple of times, but she prefers young men who stay up past nine. At this point in her life, she’s after excitement, in and out of bed. Nothing long-term. She won’t be ready for anything permanent until she’s more comfortable in her own skin. That kind of maturity sometimes takes a long time to develop when you’ve got a trust fund and a platinum card. She needs to realize that every decision has a consequence. She needs to learn to make better choices.”

  “Sometimes you scare me.” Maddy sat back in her chair. “Or maybe it’s the women that scare me and the fact that you escaped these relationships alive. What do you think your wife will say when she realizes how many women you’ve slept with? Not to mention the quality of women?”

  “Wife? Who said anything about a wife?” If he was anything like his father – and who was he kidding, he was – marriage was the worst situation for him.

  “I’m just curious. You’re twenty-six. Most guys settle down in their late twenties, satisfied with their career path, happy to be in a steady relationship.”

  Blue had never thought about marriage in those terms. Marriage was an end to the excitement life had to offer, like eating vanilla ice cream every night when there were hundreds of exotic flavors out there. He’d never managed to stay with a woman more than a few weeks, a few months, tops. Like father, like son.

  Except when Blue thought about Amber and Evan…Just last week they’d emerged from her office looking rumpled and satisfied. Nothing at all like what he associated with long-term commitment. Not boring. Not pussy-whipped. Not caged.

  “Have I stumped you?”

  “No. The question just came out of left field.” Blue stared at Maddy. “I suppose my wife is going to have to be confident enough in herself that she won’t care who came before her.”

  “Excellent.” Maddy powered down the camera. “Where are you taking me for lunch?”

  “You filmed that?” Betrayal stabbed sharply between his shoulder blades.

  Maddy shrugged. “You were talking and I forgot to turn the camera off.”

  “That’s a lie.”

  “It was one of those honest moments. Don’t sweat it. The camera loves you.” Maddy’s smile dared him to lose control and rant, or take control and kiss her. Either course was madness.

  “My private life is private,” he said through bared teeth, using all his will to remain seated, to remain calm.

  “Are you listening to these women? You’re life as a private person is over.”

  Her smile-her smile-her smile.

  The verdict was in. He wanted to kiss it off.

  Blue held himself very still. “My reputation will be ruined.”

  Maddy almost looked sorry.

  Almost.

  Chapter 13

  “I’m Kaya Anika. You may know me as a finalist from the Amazing Race. I met Blue last winter when he scheduled some promotional appearances for the cast of the show. He had this fascination with having sex in public places – department store dressing rooms, nightclub bathrooms, the back seat of my car.”

  Maddy had purposefully left Kaya’s interview for last. She didn’t need to take any notes. She knew Kaya was going to be on the show. The woman was so intense, she was scary, but she was train wreck scary, ratings heaven scary. You couldn’t look away – not from her sneer, her low-cut blouse, or her red spiky hair.

  Blue sat stoically gazing out the window. He’d gone out to get Maddy a meatball sandwich and a diet coke for lunch, and been too quiet ever since.

  “And did your career benefit while you were with him?”

  “God, yes. Any attention is good attention. I had more offers for appearances and shows than I knew what to do with.” She wouldn’t stop staring at Blue. “But I wasn’t with him for my career. I was there to please him. To love him. To worship his body. Once I even went down on him underneath a table at Lula Botelli’s. If they’re going to put a white tablecloth all the way down to the floor, why waste it?”

  Kaya was going to totally make the show.

  “Speaking of why,” Maddy managed to form words past the shocking feeling of being turned on rather than disgusted. “Why did you start the Playboy Avengers?” This was the only question that could be a deal breaker.

  “Because he’s an ass,” Kaya retorted hotly. And then her expression softened as she gazed at Blue. “I didn’t think it was right the way he loved us and left us.”

  “I’ve sat here all day and heard only one complaint about the way Blue treated the women he dated,” Maddy said. “He treated all his girlfriends like royalty. He never said no until he said goodbye.”

  “Nobody’s complaining about the way they were treated, other than being dumped for next week’s entrée without warning or reason. We all wanted more of Blue. For some of us, this was our way of saying, give us a second chance.” For a moment, Kaya’s expression bordered between utter love and utter madness.

  If a teenager had given that answer, Maddy wouldn’t have been surprised. But coming from this woman, it was one hell of a surprise.

  “For others, it was payback or a chance to get some media exposure.”

  Maddy latched onto Kaya’s first excuse. “But as a group, you couldn’t each hope to win him back. How does that work?”

  “He’s like the Holy Grail of boyfriends. It says something that you caught his attention in the first place. And to win him back, even for a short time, that says a lot about you as a woman. You’re considered powerful and sexy in Hollywood if you’ve slept with him.”

  That said a lot about young Hollywood, most of it bad. “Are you willing to take advice from Blue to improve your love life?”

  “Dude, I’d take advice from Blue on how to improve my sex life with my vibrator.”

  “And will you cease all Avenger activities?” It was the first time Blue had spoken to one of their candidates on camera all day. His gaze was so intense, Maddy was surprised Kaya didn’t shrink back.

  Maddy sensed his question was his own personal deal breaker. She gripped her pencil so tight her fingernail pierced the yellow wood.

  Kaya spiked her already spiky crimson hair, as if shaken that Blue had finally spoken to her. “If that’s what it takes to keep your attention. Yes.”

  He leaned forward, mere inches, but Maddy noted the corded muscles in his neck and the hard angle of his jaw. She wished she had two cameras. “You’ll make sure all the Avengers do the same.” It was a command, not a ques
tion.

  “Yes.” Kaya’s spine stiffened, even as Maddy’s relaxed into her chair. “No more posts if this show is on the level. No more posts if we get treated with respect. Do you want, like, the Girl Scout oath or something?”

  “Your word will do.”

  Maddy’s head was buzzing with excitement. After Kaya left, Maddy turned to Blue. “That was – ”

  “I feel like a total pervert. She makes it sound…it wasn’t like that…” He looked away. “All the time.”

  Yeah. And the Pope wasn’t Catholic. “Based on what some of these women said, you’ve been a bit, shall we say, randy?” Maddy would’ve liked to say a very, very bad boy, but that seemed too school-marmish, even for Auntie Maddy.

  “Their perspective of me and my perspective of me are total opposites.”

  “How so?” This was really interesting. Maddy powered the camera on and moved to swivel it around.

  But Blue shook his head. “Don’t.”

  She left it on, focused on the wall. “How would you describe yourself, Blue? Go on. You’ve analyzed everyone in this room today except yourself.” She could always use a good voice-over.

  Blue stared at her for so long Maddy was sure he was going to wimp out on the question. But he surprised her. “I’ve sewn some wild oats, to use a cliché. I had no idea that my idea of a good time came with such high expectations. I thought I was giving them what they wanted in the short-term – excitement, sex, fun. They were all on the club circuit. I thought they’d know it wouldn’t last.”

  Nobody went down easy. They’d all been in love with him. And they’d all fallen fast.

  “I never said I was looking to settle down,” he said defensively.

  “But you never said you weren’t, either. And it sounds like you gave them the fairy tale man instead of yourself.” They’d all seen him as their perfect mate. They didn’t see his flaws or his insecurities. They didn’t see anything beyond the man who pleasured them in bed...or wherever. “What did you expect them to think?”

  “I expected them to be more like me and see our relationship more…like a man, I guess.” The ego was gone. The sexual veneer dissolved. The haughty look in his eyes expired. This wasn’t the playboy, but the man, raw and exposed. “I’m not sure where I go from here.”

  Maddy was torn between turning the camera on him and turning it off. As a compromise, she left it facing the wall. “Why not focus on your career? You know relationship dynamics and everyone wants a happily-ever-after. Wave your godfather magic wand and clean up in the sales department. I’d pay twenty bucks just to have you read my palm at the county fair.”

  “Twenty bucks isn’t going to help me.” Slumped in his chair with a pink bundle of fluff in his lap, Blue looked in need of a hug.

  “This reality show will help. I promise.” She couldn’t wait to start editing. “We need your evaluation of Kaya.”

  “I’m not going on record with what I think of her.” Blue stood, cradling Mr. Jiggles. “She’s like someone you met during a bachelor party in Vegas that followed you home. Jesus. Just sitting here and watching her talk about the things we did – ”

  “Let me tell you something.” Maddy came around the desk and put her hand on Blue’s shoulder, because he seemed more shaken than she’d expected given he knew his own past. “Few men have the opportunity to make amends like this. You seem to have a gift. Why not use it for good?”

  “You mean abandon the dark side?” One corner of his mouth ticked up.

  “That’s exactly what I mean. Leave Blue, the heartbreaker, in the past. Transition to Blue, the love doctor.” And in the process, cement her career.

  “The verdict is in. I’m scum. Like Dad.” Blue entered Cora’s office and shut the door. His body felt as if it’d been run over by a truck. He wanted to go home, get drunk, and pass out. Unfortunately, his day as Blue Rule, relationship coach, wasn’t over. Nor was his day as Blue Rule, older brother and total rube, finished.

  He sank into a chair. He’d forgotten his sister hung out with Portia. He had to confront Cora about his suspicions that she was the leak in his life, that she’d helped make the Playboy Avengers so successful. He didn’t want to ask, afraid of what he might hear.

  Mr. J plopped down in the corner nearest Cora. Even the dog trusted her.

  “That bad?” Cora’s look was believably sympathetic, when just a few months ago their interactions had been capped by Cora’s sneer. She should have gone into acting.

  “Would you like to hear your ex-boyfriends analyze your relationships?”

  Rather than answer, Cora gathered up the pens on her desk and dropped them into a teak pencil holder. She checked her cell phone.

  “I forgot. Moot question since you don’t have regular relationships.” Blue slumped in his chair. These last few weeks he thought their relationship had changed for the better. He was failing at everything.

  “You look like you’ve been bitch-whipped. It can’t be that bad.” Cora smiled as if she was his most caring, trustworthy sister, capable of keeping his secrets and watching his back. “If it is, don’t do this reality thing.”

  “Unfortunately, Maddy is brilliant.” Making Dave look remedial by comparison. She was spot on in her evaluations of his ex-girlfriends. And maybe of him, too. “She may not have made a name for herself yet, but it’s only a matter of time, timing and contacts.” Blue considered how to approach the topic of Cora’s selling him out to the Avengers. He drew a blank, because it had really been a shit day. “Meanwhile, my reputation will be in ruins and my chances at my inheritance blown, because not only will I look like a dick with women when the show airs, but I won’t be able to match anyone up. I’m not Dad.”

  “You’re assuming the show airs. You have a ton of studio connections. Why don’t you just pay someone to agree to produce the pilot and then have them tell Maddy it’s no good after she turns in the preliminary film?” Cora checked her cell phone again. “In the meantime, the press from the work you’re doing now and whatever good can possibly come out of Dave’s film might appease the Avengers and send them on their way.”

  “That’s evil…but brilliant.” Amber couldn’t fault Blue for not making an effort. His reputation would be saved. Even Maddy would get exposure to a top notch production team. And Blue knew just the guy for the job.

  “Five o’clock. Quitting time.” Cora looked at him expectantly, as if he’d just leap up and let her go home or to whatever hook-up or evil Avenger event she had planned.

  The time for procrastination was over. “Why’d you do it? Why’d you work with the Avengers?”

  For the first time in a long time, Cora looked guilty, as evidenced by the way her eyes tensed and her lips thinned.

  Sympathy dissipated. “Do you hate me that much?”

  “I didn’t – ”

  “Don’t lie!”

  She blinked back something that was suspiciously like tears. Really? Cora didn’t cry. “I…” She glanced at him and then at her phone. “I didn’t think it would get so…”

  “So nasty? So personal? Have you met Kaya?” He’d lost his freedom. He’d lost his self-respect. He’d given up sex! Because of his sister? “Did Kaya put you up to this?” His one last out for his sister.

  “No.”

  “Then why?” When she didn’t answer, he stood and slapped his hand on the desk. “Why, Cora?”

  The fire returned to her eyes. “Because I thought it would cure you once and for all of wanting to date a bitch. You and Amber are different. People like you. There’s no reason for you to go all shallow…like me. I thought…I thought…” She swallowed. “I thought it would teach you a lesson and make you happy.”

  Something clicked, something familiar and unwelcome. “Like Dad. It’s exactly what Dad would have done.” Nausea made his head swim, his legs unsteady. “You could have talked to me. You could have told me how you felt.” But she couldn’t. Their family didn’t do feelings and honesty. “Shit, you blindsided me, just lik
e Dad.”

  Cora paled. “I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry. I just wanted you – ”

  “To be happy. Yeah, I know.” Blue walked on unreliable legs toward the door. “Forgive me if I don’t accept your apology.”

  “Daddy made it look so easy. People appreciated what he did.”

  Blue gripped the doorknob. “But we never liked it. I can never forgive you for this.”

  Her chin came up. “You’ll forgive me. Even Cal Lazarus forgave Daddy eventually.”

  “That’s because clients asked for his help. They agreed to his terms. Maladjusted Hollywood divas latched onto Dad because they believed they could trust him, that he could save them from whatever sinking boat they thought they were on. People believed he was their lifeboat.” Who would be his? Not Cora.

  Maddy’s face came to mind – calm, impishly smiling, understanding. The image needled his conscience – Maddy would forgive Cora.

  “You have to forgive me. Nine months together, remember?” There was a desperation to her tone that spoke of lost opportunity and overplayed hands.

  He spared his ice princess sister an unsympathetic look over his shoulder. “I don’t have to do anything.” Including help her meet her sales quota and become a millionaire.

  The bar at the Beverly Hills Hotel was packed. There was some kind of toy convention in town and many of the event participants were staying at the hotel, thirsty and wanting to network or perhaps hobnob with a movie star. The noise level was loud enough to mask a screaming murder victim. Just a few hours in to her shift, Maddy had been told bad jokes, propositioned, and heard a few drunken, guilty confessions. This group had obviously been away from their wives too much lately, or the toys they were selling weren’t for tots.

  Despite the abuse, Maddy was as energized as if she’d taken four shots of espresso. She couldn’t wait to go home and start editing clips from her video into a sizzle reel.

  She hoped her work would attract funding to create a pilot, but she’d accept money to do more preliminary film or even write up a treatment outlining how she thought the first season would go. In a perfect world, she’d ride the wave of the Rules’ popularity and be green-lighted for a season.