Apocalypse to Go

  “Got it.” I glanced at Ari. “So you need a British-y sounding name.”

  “What about Eric Spare?”

  “Very good.” Spare14 nodded at him. “Now all we need is the world-walker. I do hope the Head Office can send one soon.”

  I considered mentioning Dad’s set of boxes but decided against it. For all of Spare14’s relentlessly avuncular persona, I didn’t quite trust him where my father was concerned. The boxes, I figured, might come in handy later if I needed to strike some kind of bargain.

  For a while that afternoon, we continued to discuss strategy for our move onto Interchange. We needed to have everything in place before our transportation became available. Thanks to the demand, TWIXT agents had only a brief window to use a world-walker’s services before the psychic had to move on to the next job.

  “We’ll go directly to my office,” Spare14 said. “We’ll be safe there. It’s a lovely irony, in a way. Since I’ve paid the Axeman, no one will dare attack us on the premises. His gang would retaliate. He’s quite reliable, really, in his way.”

  As he was leaving, Spare14 paused to ask me, “I don’t suppose you have any news for me concerning the liaison offer?”

  “I do, yeah. The higher-ups are extremely interested. They’re thinking in terms of holding a face-to-face meeting as a next step.”

  Spare14 smiled and followed Ari down the stairs.

  I was going to boot up my desktop and file a report to the Agency, but I heard a claw-clicking noise in the kitchen and hurried in to look. Sure enough, Or-Something was pacing back and forth on the tiled counter. At the sight of me, it gurgled and produced two large wads of paper. I opened the refrigerator and found some moldy slices of pizza, half a can of tuna fish, and a plastic bag of arugula. When I put out the pizza, the critter wagged its long scaly tail and hunkered down to eat.

  One wad of paper came from José, and the other from Sophie. I glanced through them, saw that they contained a lot of useful information, and put them on the coffee table to read later. I went into the bathroom to consider how to change my look. Although I never wore much makeup, I kept some in a drawer of the vanity. I was going through my stash when an image formed in the oval mirror over the sink. I could see Nuala standing behind me, her hands on her hips, her head tilted a little to one side as she worked on a piece of chewing gum.

  “Okay,” I said, “who are you really?”

  “Define really,” Nuala said.

  “Cute. We don’t have enough time for me to stumble around trying to pin down reality. Are you Nuala’s ghost or not?”

  “What do you think?”

  “Not, that’s what.”

  “What the hell else would I be?”

  “A projection via the squid machine. An IOI carryover from someone who’s my genetic double. An angel in disguise. A demon in disguise. Is that enough possibilities for you?”

  “None of the above.”

  “The real Nuala never took a multiple choice test in her life.” I played my trump card. “Besides, you gave yourself away when you used Latin. She didn’t know any.”

  The Nuala image snarled, then snapped her gum and disappeared.

  “A bitch, that’s what,” I said. “Right answer, but it doesn’t help.”

  I heard footsteps in the hall. In the mirror Ari’s image appeared in the bathroom door. When he walked in, I turned around and stroked his chest with both hands just to make sure I was seeing actual flesh and blood. He grinned. I was.

  “I must admit,” he said, “that I’m glad you’re not going to bleach your hair.”

  “Me, too. It would end up feeling like straw. I’ve got to do something about changing my look, though.”

  The words “changing my look” began to repeat and reverb, echoing around the tiled room. I heard Ari swear and felt his hands catch me by the shoulders.

  I walked into the gray library where the bookshelves shot off multidimensionally. The angel with the pince-nez was standing at the lectern, but instead of a book, he was staring at a laptop screen. He looked up and smiled.

  “You really might ask about those polyshifters,” he said.

  The library began to sway back and forth. The bookshelves swung around me like the flaccid arms of a drunk, but not a single book fell.

  I blinked and saw the hallway floor drifting under me. Ari had slung me over one shoulder, caveman style, and was carrying me into the bedroom. He took me to the bed and flopped me down with my head on the pillow.

  “Thanks,” I said.

  “You’re back? Brilliant! If you’d hit your head on the porcelain or the metal pipes—”

  “Yeah, I know.”

  Ari sat down on the edge of the bed and turned to face me. “What was it this time?”

  “The library and the angel again. He prompted me to ask a question.” It occurred to me that my beloved darling might be holding out on me. “Ari, do you know what a polyshifter is?”

  “No. I’ve been wondering ever since Spare14 mentioned them. Something like a werewolf, I’d suppose, but worse.”

  His SPP made it clear that he honestly didn’t know.

  “Yeah, that’s my guess, too,” I said. “Someone who can change into more than one shape. If they can do it at will, they’d be really tricky to deal with, and I suppose that’s why they can be collared legally.”

  I considered the possibility that the Nuala I’d seen was a polyshifter, but she was basically insubstantial, an image, not flesh. No one could put a platinum collar on an apparition.

  “But that reminds me,” I went on. “Don’t you have a data file on SanFran on that educational online location?”

  He froze.

  “You do, don’t you?” I said. “And you don’t want to tell me because it’s classified information.”

  He merely stared at me.

  “You’re incriminating yourself with silence,” I went on. “You might as well admit it.”

  “There are times—” Ari punched his left hand with his right fist, though not as hard as usual. “I suppose you’re going to make my life miserable again, wheedling it out of me.”

  “Your life? Last time it only took ten minutes before you cracked.”

  “That’s very unfair of you.”

  “I’ve got need to know. I want that file.”

  “Nola! I’ve decided I want to join TWIXT. I don’t want to jeopardize my chances by giving you access that you’re not entitled to have.”

  “Last time—”

  “Last time I didn’t know if I wanted to join or not. The issue wasn’t as important.”

  “Hah! Then it’s your career you’re worried about, not the ethics of the thing.”

  “I don’t see why that has anything to do with the matter.”

  “You keep sounding more and more British. That means you know you’re on shaky ground.”

  He growled at me. When I ran a quick check on his Qi, I felt frustration and annoyance, but not his core rage.

  “Let’s see,” I said. “We could do the handcuffs and the garter belt again, and I suppose I really do deserve a spanking for this.”

  His Qi level rose, but not high enough. I thought of various inducements, all of which I’d disliked in the past, but with Ari as a partner, it was possible that I’d enjoy them. I sat up and smiled at him.

  “Or you could tie me down this time, not just use the handcuffs,” I said. “To the bed, I mean. Ankles, too. Spread out. You know?”

  His Qi spiked. He stared at me in sad-eyed, droop-mouth martyrdom.

  “I’ve been an awfully bad girl, Ari,” I said.

  He groaned, leaned over, and kissed me. I made him print out the SanFran file before we went any further.

  When I got around to reading it, much later that afternoon, I found three pages of background and twenty pages of crucial detail. It listed the most important people and families, noted the prominent buildings, named the important public officers. It also described the existing neighborhoods and gave them a d
anger rating, most of which were high. Although the information was far from complete, I had a few details of my own to fill in some of the blanks, thanks to the most recent notes from José and Sophie. I collated their information as I read the stuff from Ari.

  Politically speaking, two top dogs ran SanFran. The elected mayor—and he did seem to be elected the old-fashioned way—was in charge of the hilltop enclaves of the wealthy, both middle class and outright rich. The big prize in the underworld was the job of Chief of Police, currently held by the leader of the top gang, the Blue Force as they called themselves. The Chief dominated everything and everybody else. As long as he kept the general population under control, the mayor and his kind paid him well.

  Where was all this money coming from? Gold. On Terra Three the big mines in the Sierra had never been picked clean. Individuals still panned and prospected in the mountains. Over in the East Bay hills, in a world where no one thought in terms of parks, green belts, and ecology, a few small mines still leaked mercury into the Bay and gold into the pockets of investors. All of the gold, and a little silver as well, came through SanFran, where some of it kept the rich rich and the Chief of Police employed.

  Getting that top job for the Axeman, the Storm Blue boss, was going to mean a gang war as well as a lot of bribe money changing hands. A world-walker could command high fees from all the people who wanted out of SanFran and off of Interchange for good. Sophie was right. The kidnapping was all about the money.

  I was still reading when Ari wandered in from the bedroom. He’d put on his jeans and a blue T-shirt, frayed around the neckband with age. White Hebrew letters marched across the chest in two peeling rows.

  “What does that say?” I said.

  “Microsoft Windows. I got it free at a trade show in Tel Aviv.” He paused for a yawn. “Tzaki was visiting, and he insisted we go.”

  I’d fallen into one of my standard mistakes: thinking of Israel as the biblical land of ancient mystery. Ari sat down at my left on the couch and put an arm around my shoulders to draw me close. I slid the printout under the cushion to my right.

  “I’m not going to grab that from you,” he said. “Don’t you trust me?”

  “After what I just let you do to me, how can you even ask that?”

  “Point taken.” He hesitated on the edge of embarrassment. “Er, you weren’t just pretending to um, well, enjoy all that um, well, kind of sex, were you?”

  “No, I sure wasn’t.” Much to my surprise, I’ll admit, I’d found it intensely pleasurable. “You know, it made me think about things. There are times when I really feel Chaotic. Like I could spin out of control. Sometimes I do go over that edge.”

  “Such as those walking trances? And the leopard women?”

  “Yeah, exactly. Mostly I can keep it together, when I’m working or with my family. But other times—” I hesitated because I disliked the insight I was facing. “I’m really serious about serving Harmony. I hate feeling like a Chaotic.”

  “And so you feel safe when I take charge of you in bed. Safe enough to really let go, I mean.”

  I winced. Even though I tried, I could not bring myself to look at him. “Yeah,” I said eventually. “That’s it.”

  “It’s fine with me, mind. I’m hardly complaining.”

  “That was obvious, yeah.”

  He chuckled under his breath. I rested my head on his shoulder and wondered if I was blushing. If so, he never mentioned it.

  “I have to admit,” Ari said, “that when you announced you wanted that data, my first reaction was to wonder what you’d offer me for it.”

  “You bas— I mean, you creep!”

  “I was rather ashamed of myself.”

  He sounded so sincere that I ran an SPP. Yes, he was ashamed, though not very.

  “Which reminds me,” I said. “I take it you told Spare14 what you knew about my father’s criminal offenses.”

  “No, actually, I didn’t. He probably looked up the file before he came over. Given his position in TWIXT, I’m sure he has access to whatever intel he needs.”

  “Then please forgive my suspicious mind,” I said. “You know, neither of us are nice people.”

  He sighed. “True,” he said. “I love you anyway.”

  “Is that an insult or a compliment?”

  For an answer he kissed me.

  Although I debated, I finally decided to call Aunt Eileen and tell her that we were going to Interchange. She’d only dream about it, and I wanted her to have clear information. She was pleased to learn that Interpol had what I termed “resources” to help us. As usual, she was too tactful to insist on more information.

  “I suppose,” I said, “there’s no use in telling you not to worry.”

  The only answer I received was a long drawn-out sigh.

  “I thought so,” I went on. “Well, do your best, okay? And feed Sophie tranks if you have any.”

  “I do have some. I got her a prescription when she started displaying the symptoms. You know. For the other problem.”

  “Right. I’d almost forgotten that. Lycanthropy seems so ordinary now.”

  Aunt Eileen laughed with only a bare trace of hysteria. I had to admire her self-control.

  “Will you call Al for me?” I said. “Tell him that we’re on our way to get his domestic partner back home.”

  “I’ll do that. He’ll be so relieved.” She hesitated. “I just hope you can find them and be safe yourselves.”

  I dredged up every bit of confidence I possessed and put it into my voice. “I’ll call you the minute we get them back home.”

  I could only hope the confidence was justified.

  While Ari put together a scrappy dinner, I called my second-in-command, Annie Wentworth. I told her that Ari and I would be following a case out of the area and that she’d be in charge until we returned.

  “Just stay on Chaos watch, basically,” I said. “I’ll file a report with the Agency later tonight and tell them what’s going on. I’ll copy it to you. You’ll need to stay in touch with Y.”

  “All right,” Annie said. “Do you think you’ll be gone long?”

  “I hope not. If we’re not back in ten days, say, ask Y for temporary help from Washington.”

  “I’ll do that. Do you want Jerry to come stay in your flat?”

  “No. Ari’s already taken care of that. His friend Itzak’s going to keep an eye on the place.”

  After we ate, Ari and I drove to a local chain drugstore, one of those where the actual drugs are hard to find among the kids’ toys, snack foods, cooking equipment, cosmetics, and whatever else they can cram in. While I loaded up on beauty supplies, Ari wandered off, probably, I figured, to find an aisle displaying more manly goods. I went looking for him and finally saw him thumbing through magazines at the front of the store.

  Just as I turned down the aisle and started pushing my cart toward him, the goddess Diana materialized between a bin of on-sale Easter candy and stacks of soft drinks. Dressed in a white hunting tunic and high boots, she glowed with a silver light that came from her chalky white flesh. In her hands she carried a bow, and a quiver of arrows hung at one hip.

  “Seek me,” she said. “Remember this well: seek me.”

  She vanished before I could ask for clarification. I continued on down the aisle and fetched up next to Ari, who was leafing through an issue of American Rifleman. He smiled at me and returned the magazine to the shelf.

  “Ready to go?” he said.

  “Yeah. I just had a visitation from another goddess.”

  He sighed, deeply and in some distress. “I’d best be the one to drive home, then,” was all he said.

  When we got back to the flat, I found a message from Spare14 on the landline, saying that he’d heard from the “personnel department about the temporary help.” I called him immediately.

  “Tomorrow at ten AM,” Spare14 said, “the world-walker’s due to arrive in my office. If you could be there?”

  “Promptly,” I said
. “Where’s the gate we’re going to use?”

  “Reasonably close by, actually—to my office here, I mean. Unfortunately, it debouches a good distance away from my office there.” He emphasized the word “there.”

  “I take it you don’t want to use the gate in my aunt’s house.”

  “The Axeman’s gang must be keeping a watch on the BGs and their territory. They may even suspect that the house gate exists.”

  “Ah, I get it. If they do, and we come through it, they could be waiting for us.”

  “Exactly.”

  “One last question. Is there somewhere safe to leave Ari’s car?”

  “Oh, yes. Here, let me speak to him, and I’ll fill him in on that sort of detail.”

  I handed the phone to Ari, then took the drugstore bags into our bedroom. I shut the drapes, turned on the light, and spread the things I’d bought out on the bed. I was organizing the various items when Ari came in.

  “What is all that?” Ari asked from behind me.

  “My disguise,” I said. “In the morning I’m going to be a SanFran sex industry worker, and you’re going to be my pimp.”

  He said something in Hebrew.

  “Look, Ari, I know you don’t like this idea, but we’re going to a place where there are other psychics all over the place. What if someone spots me as a foreign influence? I might have to run a Shield until we get to Spare14’s office, which means I’m going to feel drunk out of my mind.”

  “True. But what—”

  “So I’ll be a working girl that you’ve strung out on drugs. That’s normal for there. Can you think of a better cover story? If you can, we’ll go with that instead.”

  He shoved both hands into his jeans’ pockets and contemplated the floor for several minutes. “No.” He looked up with a shrug. “It’s the logical choice for our destination. Although, given the radiation levels, instead of drunk you could perhaps pretend to be brain-damaged. That would take less effort, too, since it would come to you naturally.”

  He stepped back fast before I could kick him.

  “Very funny. Ha ha. I hope I can avoid putting up the SH. I’ll feel crummy enough until we get my brothers back.”