Feel Like Making Love

  He was gorgeous, smart, funny...and an outrageous flirt. The sort of guy she'd avoided in college, setting her sights instead on the nice guy, the reliable one--Ted.

  And where had that left her? Nice, reliable Ted had discovered the pleasures of constant one-night stands while on the road, the joys of corporate success that outweighed the quieter joy of domestic bliss. He'd left her for his secretary, a cliché so overdone Audrey had laughed when he told her. When she finally cried, it wasn't for herself, but for the dreams they'd shared. For her child, Lauren, who now saw her daddy every other weekend, which turned out to be more often than when he'd actually lived with them.

  The divorce had been swift and equitable. It had left her with enough money to go back to school and get her Masters in Psychology, keep food on the table, clothes on their backs. She wasn't interested in much more, right now.

  Not even if it came packaged in a six-foot-two, dark-haired, dark-eyed, swaggering bad boy who made her laugh.

  * * * *

  Joel wheeled the cart of magazines and games into the social room. "Hey, Morty, my main man."

  "Joely," answered the older man with a grin that showed his straight white dentures. "How they hanging?"

  "High and dry," Joel answered without missing a beat. Morty was his favorite resident at Country Breezes. The octogenarian had a wicked sense of humor and a weakness for butterscotch pudding, but along with that, he never seemed to assume that, because Joel was young, he didn't know what end was up. Morty never patronized him.

  "Young fella like you? That's a shame." Morty chuckled, wheeling his chair closer to Joel's cart. "I don't suppose you have any girly mags in that pile?"

  "Sorry, man. Nurse Ratchett checks 'em out before I bring them in. I've got some the same old celebrity rags and the home decorating stuff. But I did manage to snag you a couple Weekly News of the Weird."

  Morty laughed. "Oy, just what this old man needs, more news of the weird. As if living next door to Sasquatch Frank's not weird enough."

  Joel laughed. "I haven't seen Frank in a while. How's he doing?"

  Morty sobered a bit. "Failing. Been in bed with a cold that won't quit."

  He didn't say more, but he didn't have to. Being constrained to bed was never a good sign in Country Breezes. Joel nodded and passed Morty a copy of the black and white pulp paper.

  "Sorry, man."

  Morty waved a hand. "It's what happens, right? You get old, you get sick...feh. Enough of that. What're you doing here? I thought you worked your second gig tonight."

  "I do, but that's not until later. I need the cash, man." Joel shrugged. "School's not cheap, you know?"

  Morty nodded. "Tell me about it. But working on a Friday night...no fun. No dates? No girls in your life? What's going on? I thought you were the Don Juan of Millersville University."

  Joel shrugged. "There's a girl. But...she's not really into me. We're study buddies."

  Morty looked so astounded Joel had to laugh again.

  "Study buddies? What's that, some newfangled slang for...something?"

  "No. It means we have class together. We study together. That's it."

  "She invites you to her house?"

  "Well...yeah." They usually studied a couple of times a week.

  "She likes you," Morty said with an old man's self-righteous confidence.

  Joel shook his head. "Nah, man...she's...different."

  "Trust me, sonny, she's not that different." Morty shook a gnarled finger. "She's a woman, right?"

  "Definitely."

  "She makes you food?"

  Joel laughed. "Sometimes."

  "She likes you. Ask her out."

  "I can't do that, man." Joel started tidying up the chair cushions someone had tossed about. "If I ask her out and she says no, it'll ruin our friendship."

  Morty started to gasp, a hand over his heart, and Joel dropped the cushions and ran to his side. The old man grabbed his wrist. "Get me a magnifying glass, quick!"

  Joel was already reaching for the button on the wall to call a nurse, but he hesitated. "What do you need a magnifying glass for?"

  "To look for your balls, sonny!" Morty cackled, and Joel stepped back. "What's the matter with you?"

  "Not funny, man." Joel put his hands on his hips and glared at Morty, who looked unrepentant. "You almost gave me a heart attack."

  Morty waved a hand again. "Feh. This is not the Joely I know and love. What's different about this girl from all the others?"

  Joel leaned against the window seat. "For starters, she's not a girl, she's a woman."

  Morty nodded eagerly. "Oh, yeah? Older woman, huh?"

  "She's not that much older. But she's not some silly kid either. She's..." He shrugged, not sure how to describe Audrey without sounding like a sap. "She's a hard worker. And smart...man, is she smart. And beautiful. She's just..."

  "Sonny, you've got it bad." Morty sighed, shoulders hunching. "And you can't ask her out?"

  "She's divorced," Joel said, like that explained it.

  Morty wasn't appeased by such a throwaway answer. "So?"

  "So, she's a little shy of dating. And she's got a daughter, a great kid named Lauren."

  "So you've met the daughter?"

  Joel shrugged. "Well...yeah. When I go over to study, she's usually there. And we've gone out for dinner or ice cream a couple of times after class."

  "But those weren't dates?" Morty looked astounded, shaking his head.

  "No, that's just hanging out."

  "Times change, times change," Morty muttered, almost to himself. "Listen, sonny, she likes you. She invites you to her house, she lets you meet her kid, that means she likes you."

  "She likes me," Joel countered. "That doesn't mean she, you know, likes me."

  Morty laughed and set his chair in motion toward the door. "Only one way to find out, sonny. Ask her out."

  "I can't do that, man!" Joel called after him.

  "What a wimp!" came the old man's retort from down the hall, and Joel laughed, though the words had the ring of truth.

  Yeah, he was a wimp. At least when it came to Audrey. Morty hadn't been far wrong, calling him the Don Juan of Millersville. Joel knew how the rumors had started. Date a professor, even one who taught classes you'd never taken, and you had to expect there to be talk. That he and Marlene had only gone to dinner and a movie hadn't seemed to matter, not when they'd been spotted by Suze Pennypacker, the girl with the biggest mouth and wildest imagination Joel had ever met. Suze had been the one start the rumor that Joel supplemented his income as a paid escort, and since he refused to give her the satisfaction even of denying it, the story had passed around and around until it became legend. It had followed up him from undergrad days until now.

  It hadn't seemed to hurt him. Joel had his share of admirers. He went on dates. He wasn't proud of his reputation as a flirt, but he wasn't exactly ashamed of it either. He had fun with girls, and he liked to think they had fun with him. He didn't give them any reason to believe it was ever anything other than dinner and dancing or a movie. It wasn't like he took them out, seduced them into bed and then dumped them. Being labeled a man-for-hire had probably earned him more action than anything else...at least while he'd been looking for it.

  The truth was, he hadn't been to bed with anyone in a little over a year--not since meeting Audrey. He'd had plenty of opportunities, but the appeal of the casual sex he'd once found so much a part of student life had palled greatly. He wasn't an undergrad anymore. But a reputation, once earned, is hard to shake, and even the professors knew him as Joel Goodman, the flirt. The guy with the golden grin.

  It could be frustrating. Could he help it if he liked women? If he knew how to talk to them better than most guys his age? If it just came easy to him? What was he supposed to do, turn into the sort of doofus a lot of his buddies seemed to be around girls, when compliments came easier to his lips than playing it cool?

  In high school, his best friend Gary had once asked how he manag
ed to get even the hottest girls to talk to him, the ones who wouldn't blink an eye for anything less than a star football player or prom king.

  To Joel, it had seemed simple enough. "Tell them the truth."

  "But girls like that hear the truth all the time," Gary said.

  "So find something true about them they haven't heard," was Joel's response.

  "But you don't just flirt with the pretty girls," Gary had persisted. "You flirt with all of them. They all love you, man."

  "Every girl has something pretty about her," Joel had told his friend, who never seemed to get it.

  He'd meant it then and it still held true today. All women had something about them to enjoy. Was it his fault if he liked putting smiles on their faces? It had never seemed like a bad thing before.

  Until now. Until meeting Audrey and having her think he was just one more smooth operator. Yeah, she liked him as a study friend, but it was always clear she kept him at arm's distance, and he supposed he couldn't really blame her.

  Joel Goodman, the guy with the golden grin.

  Sometimes, that really sucked.

  * * * *

  "Daddy'll drop you off on Sunday evening, okay?" Audrey stuffed the last of Lauren's clothes into her overnight bag and ran her hands over her daughter's smooth blonde hair. "You have everything?"

  Lauren nodded. "Daddy and Tammy are taking me to the zoo!"

  Audrey smiled. "That sounds like fun."

  Lauren squeezed her mom around the waist. "I wish you could come, Mommy."

  "Oh, honey –"

  "I know, I know." Lauren rolled her eyes. "You and daddy are divorced. I got it. But you'd like the zoo, Mommy. And you won't have any fun here alone."

  Audrey kissed the top of Lauren's head and hugged her tight. "I'll be fine, sweetie."

  Those words stayed with her, though, as she put Lauren in the back seat of Ted's expensive car and waved as they drove away. No fun. Was that what her life had become?

  Studying, cleaning, taking care of her child. It left little room for much else, which had been fine for her. But no fun?

  She'd just settled down at the kitchen table with her books and a pot of tea when the phone jangled.

  "Audrey."

  "Hi, Karen." Audrey poured steaming Earl Grey into her mug and added sugar. "What's up?"

  "Cinco de Mayo, baby, that's what's up. Tonight."

  Audrey capped her highlighter and tapped it against the thick book in front of her. She'd only made it through half the chapter so far. "What about it?"

  On the other end of the phone, Karen snorted. "We're going out. You're coming with us. No excuses. I know Lauren went to Ted's this weekend. You're coming out with us."

  "Okay."

  "No ifs, ands or buts. It's time you got out and took advantage of being a single mom." Karen had been divorced for three years. She liked to say she was a serial monogamist with attention deficit disorder. One guy at a time, just a different one every month.

  "I said all right." Audrey stuck her bookmark back in the chapter. "Where are we going?"

  "Wait a minute. You said okay?"

  "Yeah." Audrey frowned at her friend's assumption she'd resist. "You're right. It's Friday night, Lauren's gone for the weekend, and I can study all day tomorrow. Where are we going?"

  Karen let out a little whoop. "Muy caliente!"

  Audrey laughed. "I see your Spanish lessons are paying off."

  "No, hon. Muy Caliente. It's a show."

  "What kind of show?" Audrey closed the book and leaned back in her chair to sip her tea.

  "All male revue."

  "Oh, Karen." Audrey laughed. "Good Lord."

  "It'll be fun," Karen said. "C'mon. It'll be a blast."

  "Is this like...Chippendales? Or what?" Audrey tried to think of the last time she'd been out anywhere, much less at a nudie show. "Do they get completely naked?"

  "I don't know," Karen said with a little squeal. "But apparently they do this once a month, and it's always themed. This month it's Cinco de Mayo. Latin lovers. That sort of thing."

  "Muy Caliente," Audrey murmured with a shake of her head. "What should I wear?"

  "Nothing that has be dry-cleaned," was Karen's advice before she hung up.

  * * * *

  "Hey," Karen said. "Great jeans! Are they new?"

  Audrey looked down at the faded blue denim. "No. Old, actually. I just haven't worn them in a long time. But you said nothing that had to be dry cleaned..."

  They both laughed as they entered the club. The last time Audrey had been to the Chili Pepper, it had been called Spanky's Sports Bar. Now it featured a Latin decorating scheme, including drinks with names like "Red Hot Mama" and "Chili Chiller."

  "Muy Caliente!" cried Karen as they entered.

  The music's heavy, thumping beat reverberated in the pit of Audrey's stomach. "I should've brought ear plugs!"

  "Hello, ladies." The smiling young man who greeted them carried a handful of plastic necklaces with blinking chili pepper pendants. "Are you here for Muy Caliente?"

  "Hell, yeah!" Karen shook her ass. "We're ready."

  The host smiled. "Right this way."

  Audrey shared a look with her friend as he led them through the main bar section and down a short flight of stairs to another, much smaller room with black-painted walls and blue lighting.

  "Omigod," said Karen, "there's a pole!"

  "Have a seat," offered their host. "The show will start soon."

  Karen gripped Audrey's arm in a death grip. "Omigod, omigod...!"

  "Karen! You're the one who wanted to come here!" Audrey laughed and headed for a small couch toward the back of the room. "C'mon, it'll be fun. That's what you said. Right? Are you nervous?"

  They sat. Karen refused to let go of Audrey's arm. "Omigod. Look at this place!"

  Audrey looked the room over. Mirrors on the walls and ceiling, blue neon lighting, a nice, shiny pole on a platform in the middle of the floor. Yep. It looked like a nudie bar, all right. Not that she'd ever been in one before. "This is some set up. You say they do this every month? What do they do with the space the rest of the time?"

  "Private parties," said a low, rumbling voice, and Audrey looked up at the young man standing in front of them. "Hi. I'm Vance."

  "Hi, Vance. I'm Audrey. This is Karen." Audrey nudged Karen, who seemed incapable of speech. "How are you?"

  Vance, clearly used to shy and wilting flowers, looked at Karen with a gleam in his eyes. "Great. You ladies up for some fun?"

  "We sure are," said Audrey firmly.

  "Good," said Vance. "We've got five guys here tonight. Any preference for music?"

  Karen, apparently, had been struck dumb. "Whatever works," Audrey said generously, having no idea what sort of music would be good for men to strip to.

  "Great!" If nothing else, Vance seemed full of enthusiasm. "Give us a couple minutes to get ready, okay?"

  As the waitress carrying a small tray and rack of shooters headed toward them, Vance added, "Oh, and by the way, because state law says that if we serve alcohol we can't be completely naked, we'll have to leave our g-strings on. Hope that'll be okay."

  Karen whimpered.

  Audrey smiled. "I'm sure it'll be fine."

  "Great!" Vance nodded and disappeared into a back room.

  "Omigod," Karen muttered.

  "Karen!" Audrey shook her. "C'mon, we're here to have a good time, remember? It'll be fine! What are you worried about?"

  "Can I get you ladies a drink from the bar?" The chipper waitress smiled. "I also make change, if you need some dollar bills."

  "Dollar bills!" Karen squeaked, falling back onto the couch in a paroxysm of trembling something-or-other. Audrey couldn't figure out if it was agony or ecstasy.

  "I'll take twenty," Audrey said, laughing at her friend. "That should be enough, right?"