To Hell And Back (The Lily Harper #3)
“Lils, you need to take it easy, girl,” Bill suggested as he took another tentative step toward me. “You were, like, dead about ten minutes ago, so don’t go thinkin’ you’re gonna hop off dickhead’s desk an’ like, start doin’ some twirls or shit.”
“I’m fine, Bill,” I managed between deep breaths. I extended my legs out before me, taking comfort in knowing that not only could I feel them, but I could control them as well. Bracing my hands on the corner of Alaire’s desk, I jumped down and my knees instantly buckled as soon as my feet touched the floor. I gripped the desk before collapsing against it, somehow managing to find the strength to keep myself from falling onto the floor. Tallis was at my side instantly, wrapping his arms around me and lifting me against him.
“You get away from me!” I roared defensively, the emotional pain feeling like a tsunami as soon as he touched me. Gulping visibly, his eyes clouded with what looked like sincere regret, but he didn’t release me.
“You heard her,” Bill said in a cold tone. He forcibly removed Tallis’s hands from around me and pulled me into his arms. “You’re never gonna ever touch her again,” Bill scolded Tallis, his eyes burning with sadness and anger.
Wrapping my arms around Bill, I tried to take a few steps forward, but it was more than difficult because my legs kept wobbling like jelly. Strangely enough, it wasn’t my ankle that caused my discomfort. Actually, I couldn’t even feel my ankle anymore. It made me wonder if the anti-venom might’ve, somehow, healed the inflammation and damage from when I’d twisted it earlier.
“I want to get out of here, Bill,” I whispered to my guardian angel. The weight of the world suddenly plopped down on my shoulders, or at least, it felt that way. Now I only wanted to get as far away from Alaire and the Underground City as possible. I longed for the comfort of my quaint and cozy apartment in Edinburgh. I couldn’t wait to lick my wounds in grim isolation, somewhere safe that would allow me to deal with my broken heart in solitude.
“You got it, baby doll,” Bill replied and we started for the double doors leading out of Alaire’s office.
“And remember: I will call you for that ‘favor’ in due time,” Alaire yelled out after us. His voice grated on my nerves like fingernails on a chalkboard.
Feeling utterly physically and mentally fatigued, I couldn’t even think of an answer, but it turned out that I didn’t have to. Bill answered for me when he lifted his left hand high above his head and flipped Alaire the bird.
Alaire only began chuckling, apparently not the least bit offended by Bill’s gesture. “You will find the Tesla waiting for you outside my building,” Alaire added. “Have a happy and safe trip home, Ms. Harper,” he purred. Then he paused momentarily, probably to take another sip of his brandy. “And do strive to keep Ms. Harper alive during your journey through the Dark Wood, angel,” he said to Bill before another acidic chuckle sounded through the room. “How ironic it would be if I saved her from the Hanuush demon’s bite, only to lose her to one of the nefarious creatures in the haunted wood. Especially knowing that she still owes me a favor …”
Bill responded by lifting his other hand high above his head and flipping Alaire the bird again. “You’re gonna be just fine, baby doll,” he whispered to me. “Billy’s gonna make sure that nothin’ in that evil forest gets you, ’kay?”
I nodded, although his words provided little to no consolation. When it came to fighting off scary things that went bump in the night, Bill wasn’t exactly my best bet. But I knew who was … At the sound of heavy footfalls, I turned and saw Tallis, just as he caught up with us. Walking past me, he opened one of the double doors for us and I hobbled through it. The longer I stood upright, the more I needed to lean on Bill, although I hated to admit it.
“Ye cannae hope tae survife the Dark Wood aloyn,” Tallis stated. His eyes were focused on me and his lips were tight. He closed the door to Alaire’s office behind us as I breathed a sigh of relief. Now, at least, I no longer had to deal with the Keeper of the Underground City. Well, that is, for the foreseeable future.
“Dude, I made it all the way here without you; soze, don’t you worry, I can make it all the way back,” Bill answered, without sparing a glance at the Scotsman. Instead, he kept his eyes glued to the elevator at the end of the hallway. “Keep goin’, Nips, you can make it,” Bill whispered to me softly.
“Ah amnae worried aboot ye,” Tallis told Bill as his eyes narrowed on me and I realized he was making a good point. It would be impossible for Bill and me to survive our trek through the Dark Wood when I could barely even walk. What was even more readily apparent? Bill couldn’t defend me if he were busy helping me take each painful step.
“We’ll manage,” Bill said. We made it to the elevator and Tallis pressed the button to call it.
“Lily is in nae shape tae travel through the woods,” Tallis insisted. The elevator doors opened and Bill hauled me inside, propping me against the elevator wall while he shook his arm out. He was, apparently, already finding it difficult to transport me which didn’t bode well for the four day trip that still awaited us. “She’s woonded, an’ as sooch, makes an easy target,” Tallis explained.
Bill started to shake his head, but I interrupted. “He’s right, Bill,” I admitted before suddenly feeling extremely dizzy again. I closed my eyes until the discomfort passed and then opened them again, only to find Tallis and Bill studying me. “I’ll only slow us down.”
“I don’t trust him,” Bill said as he glanced at Tallis from the corners of his eyes. “He sold us out once before! Who’s ta say he ain’t gonna do it again?”
“Regardless o’ yer failed troost in meh,” Tallis interrupted, “lit meh lead ye tae safety. Efter that, Ah promise ye will ne’er see meh agin.”
Hearing his words made my stomach churn and tears began filling my eyes. As ridiculous as it sounded, even now, I hated the idea of never seeing Tallis again. I was just as much in love with him as I had always been, despite his plan to sell me down the river.
Yes, but he didn’t go through with it! I argued mentally. Regardless of what his original intentions were, he chose not to hand you over to Alaire! That has to mean something!
I shook my head, losing the strength of mind and body to continue arguing with myself.
You can’t think about it now, Lily, I decided. The only thing you should be focused on is healing. Especially if you’re going to traverse the Dark Wood for the next four days, or however long it will take us, considering I can’t travel as quickly now.
The elevator dinged and the doors opened when we reached the lobby floor. Bill wrapped one of my arms around his neck and hefted me against him again. As the seconds became minutes, I felt my energy waning and found it increasingly difficult to walk.
True to Alaire’s word, we found the Tesla parked right outside of the building, its motor running silently. Tallis opened the glass doors and pulled his sword free from its scabbard across his chest. He checked both directions before turning back to Bill with a nod to let him know the coast was clear. Bill started hauling me forward, his respiration increasing as sweat began to trickle from his brow.
Tallis opened up the rear door of the Tesla and Bill crouched down, helping me into the seat. I collapsed into the warm leather, incredibly relieved that my legs didn’t have to support me any longer. Bill closed my door and ran around the car to open the other door before taking a seat beside me. “How ya holdin’ up?” he asked as he patted my shoulder.
“I’m okay,” I replied, watching Tallis sit down in the front passenger side. Once he closed his door, the driverless Tesla smoothly pulled out onto the street. I noticed a few of the Watchers as they patrolled the city streets, each of them paying special attention to us and, no doubt, reporting back to Alaire.
It was maybe five minutes before the Tesla pulled up to the city gates and parked. Tallis opened his door first. He got out without waiting for Bill and immediately opened mine. When Bill glanced over at him curiously, Tallis shook his he
ad. “She needs tae be carried an’ ye arenae able tae soopport ’er weight.”
Bill appeared ready to argue, but apparently realizing Tallis was right, slowly sighed with a quick nod. He opened his car door and hurried around the back of the Tesla to join us at the gates of the Underground City. The Tesla silently pulled into the street again, disappearing from view only moments later.
Even though I hated to admit it, I was much more comfortable in Tallis’s arms. I rested my head against his broad chest as he approached the gates, which opened automatically. We walked through them, none of us saying anything.
As soon as we were fully ensconced in the Dark Wood, and far enough away from the Underground City to where I could no longer see it, I exhaled a sigh of relief. It was a silly reaction, really, because we’d simply leapt out of the frying pan and into the fire. However, being away from Alaire provided consolation in and of itself.
“Ye should rest now, lass,” Tallis said in a soft voice, looking down at me while I looked up at him. “Yer body needs tae heal an’ the only way ’twill be able tae is if ye sleep.”
I didn’t reply as I settled my head back against his chest. Closing my eyes, I wished that things between us could have been drastically different.
***
We’d been traveling through the Dark Wood for two days and two nights. The time pretty much passed in a blur because I spent most of it sleeping. True to Tallis’s observation, my body needed a lot more rest to recuperate.
“We will stop haur fer the night,” Tallis announced when we approached an open clearing in the forest of dead trees. It was, maybe, the fifth sentence he’d said since embarking on this trip, although Bill and I weren’t talking much either. A new, but definite, undercurrent of suspicion now colored any interactions Bill and I had with Tallis, an undercurrent of suspicion which had never existed before. Every time I thought about it, the boulder in the pit of my stomach roiled.
Tallis unstrapped both his and my swords from around his chest, and leaned them against a tree trunk that stood nearby.
“It’s your turn to be on watch,” Bill told Tallis before going over to the hulled-out remains of a long dead tree. He leaned against it, scratching his back on the rough trunk a few times. “You good, nips?” he called over to me.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I answered as I sat up on the makeshift platform Tallis had built for me. Dragging the contraption with me on top of it for the last couple of days, I could only imagine how sore his arms must have been.
Because Tallis and Bill both needed to keep their hands free for protective purposes, neither one could carry me. So, Tallis, always the innovator, had built a platform for me to lie on. In order to build the platform, he’d simply collected some branches from the forest floor and tied them together, using the remarkably strong intestine that came from some unfortunate creature which happened to cross his path. Once he’d built the platform, Tallis topped it with the animal pelt he wore around his shoulders to make sure the branches wouldn’t give me any splinters.
“Hey, Conan, I could use some grub,” Bill announced before collapsing at the base of the tree. He rolled into a fetal position as he closed his eyes.
I looked up when Tallis approached me and couldn’t help but notice that he wouldn’t look me in the eyes. He didn’t say anything either but just bent down in order to lift me up from the platform. Ignoring Bill, he gently carried me to a tree next to Bill’s and leaned me against the base of it. Then he went back and retrieved his pelt from the platform, which he then laid out in front of me. I pulled myself on top of it.
The sound of heavy snoring from Bill’s direction made it pretty clear the angel was fast asleep. Hearing Bill’s noisy slumber, Tallis glanced over at him from where he knelt in front of the platform, busily checking the intestinal bindings. It looked as though he was making sure they were still intact and strong.
“Are ye hoongry, lass?” he asked, after he caught me looking at him.
“A little,” I answered. I was finally feeling surprisingly energetic and somewhat good, considering only a couple of days earlier, I was on my death bed.
Tallis only nodded at me before standing up and reaching for his sword. He started forward and soon disappeared into the dark forest that surrounded us. Barely five minutes later, he returned. His arms were full of dead tree branches, which he dropped a few feet from Bill and me. I watched him place each branch into a pile, tucking a few handfuls of old tree moss into the open crevices of the pyramid of branches. Removing a lighter from the sporran around his waist, he set the moss on fire, which instantly ignited the branches.
“So … when did you make that agreement with Alaire?” I asked, finally feeling strong enough to deal with the subject of Tallis’s betrayal so I could better understand it.
Tallis didn’t respond right away. He continued to kneel next to the fire, holding his hands over it in an attempt to warm them. “Efter our first trip intae the Oonderground City,” he replied finally, his voice soft and low.
“Did you come up with the agreement? Or did Alaire approach you?”
“He approached meh,” Tallis said as his eyes met mine. I could see the sadness and pain in their inky depths. Inside, I wanted to believe his visible regret was sincere, but I couldn’t help doubting it. I wasn’t able to hold his gaze any longer, so I looked away. “As soon as the Watchers reported tae Alaire aboot ye, he reached oot tae meh.”
I nodded as I tried to think back on all the time I’d spent with Tallis, trying to figure out a timeline for every moment we’d shared with one another. I didn’t know why, but it suddenly became extremely important to recount which events occurred prior to and after he’d made his decision. “So the time right after our first mission to the Underground City, when you showed up at my apartment in Edinburgh to tell me you wanted to continue my sword-training?” I started but then lost my voice. Tears began filling my eyes, and I furiously held them at bay.
“Aye,” he answered simply, letting me know that he had made this horrible decision prior to arriving at my apartment and persuading me to train with him again.
“Was that the reason you came to see me in Edinburgh? Because you wanted to take me back to the Underground just so you could turn me over to Alaire?” I demanded. Waves of anger inside me made me clench my hands into fists at my side.
“Aye,” Tallis replied before dropping his heavy gaze to the ground. He was quiet for a few seconds and appeared to be inspecting the terrain in front of him. Moments later, his eyes met mine. “At least, that was the reason Ah gave mahself as tae why Ah shoowed oop oan yer doorstep.”
“That was the reason you gave yourself?” I repeated scathingly. Then I scoffed as it occurred to me that maybe, he was just trying to avoid making it look like he didn’t care about me, and most likely, never had. “What other reason could there have been?”
Tallis cleared his throat, but didn’t drop his eyes from mine. “Ah wanted tae see ye agin,” he answered softly. He shrugged his massive shoulders as if to indicate it was no surprise that he’d wanted to see me again. “Mooch though Ah didnae want tae admit it tae mahself, Ah felt drawn tae ye.” He cocked his head to the side and seemed to be in deep thought. Moments later, surprise was all over his face. “Mayhap that was part o’ the reason Ah was sae determined tae leave ye wif Alaire, ’cause Ah didnae like how mooch Ah … that Ah … cared aboot ye.”
I couldn’t comment. Part of me wanted to laugh at his words sarcastically, while the other part yearned desperately to hold onto them and believe they were true. “So the whole time you were training me on how to use my sword,” I began, trying to clarify his intent. I refused to lose myself in anything pretty that might emerge from his mouth.
“Aye, Ah had already made mah decision.”
Swallowing hard, I closed my eyes and forced the tears to cease. The last thing I wanted to do now was cry in front of him. “So why did you bother training me, if you knew you were just going to turn me over to Alaire an
yway?” I persisted, finally feeling like I was in control of my emotions again.
“If anythin’, Ah wanted tae give ye a fightin’ chance wif ’im, lass.” Clearing his throat, he stood up and began to pace back and forth, rubbing the nape of his neck. “Let meh make somethin’ verra clear tae ye,” he started before facing me.
“What?” I asked when he appeared to lose his train of thought.
“Ah didnae want tae give ye tae Alaire,” he answered. His voice sounded more determined, and almost angry.
“And yet, that’s exactly what you were going to do,” I countered. I had to make damn sure I didn’t let him off easily.
“There was naethin’ Ah hated more than imaginin’ his hands all over ye, an’ heem forcin’ himself oan ye, an’ hurtin’ ye,” Tallis continued. His gaze was so intense, I preferred facing the fire instead. “Ah couldnae sleep at night,” he explained. “Ah couldnae escape the horrible images o’ him wif ye.”
“Then why did you agree to the terms?” I demanded, finding no solace in his words. “If you hated the idea of him hurting me and using me, why did you decide to go through with it? Why did you ever allow him to meet me?”
“Because Ah wanted tae believe Ah could do it,” he spat back, rubbing the back of his head again.
“You wanted to believe you could do it?” I repeated and shook my head as I wondered how I could have ever been so misled by Tallis. Here I’d thought he was this wounded man who was atoning for a past that bothered him deeply. I’d been so terribly mistaken, so absolutely wrong.
“Ah was the worst sort o’ person in mah past,” he explained, his voice growing calmer and softer again. “An’ Ah wanted tae be able tae find that power inside meh again.”