Always Been Mine

  She tried not to spend too much time at the office with him and that was easy. Her clients kept her busy outside showing properties and doing open houses. Like today, she showed so many properties she didn’t even bother going back at the end of the day. She called Luke and told him she was done. All she could think of was getting home to take a shower and relax. Luke made a comment about her showering at his place, but she politely passed on the offer.

  Valerie reiterated to Luke that she wanted to take things really slowly. After a few more heated evenings with him, she could tell Luke was getting anxious to do more. She just wasn’t ready for it. She wondered if she ever would be. How was it so damn easy for Alex to be with someone else? It hurt that he actually enjoyed being with other women while she was still waiting to feel that special something when Luke kissed her.

  Alex hadn’t stopped calling, and seeing his name on her caller ID still made her heart speed up. She didn’t dare answer. She knew it would take so little to fall for his lies again, and she’d be right back where she’d been for years, waiting for the next heartache. Just hearing his voice had such an effect on her.

  He stopped leaving her messages until Sunday night. She couldn’t bring herself to listen though she hadn’t erased it. It was still sitting in her voicemail box, unheard, and she thought about it all week.

  She threw her briefcase down and kicked off her three inch heels as soon as she walked in the door.

  Isabel was in the kitchen making something. Valerie was famished. “Smells yummy.”

  Isabel glanced up from her cutting. “The shoes, Missy.”

  Valerie walked toward the kitchen. “I’ll get them after I eat. I’m starving.”

  Isabel shot her a stern look. Valerie slumped her shoulders and went back for the shoes.

  While she was in her room putting her shoes away, she decided to change into shorts and an old t-shirt. Her phone rang. It was Luke.

  “Hey.” She held the phone against her shoulder while she pulled on her shorts.

  “Valerie, I know you’re tired I won’t keep you. I was just wondering if instead of going out to dinner tomorrow night, you wouldn’t rather come over to my place. I’ll make you dinner.”

  Valerie didn’t answer immediately and he added, “I make a kick ass lasagna. I’m at the supermarket now, so, I thought I’d call before I pick up all the stuff.”

  Valerie winced. Talk about no pressure. “Yeah, that sounds good.”

  “You sure? We don’t have to. I just thought since I’ve bragged so much about my cooking, I should make something for you already.

  Valerie smiled. “No, it really sounds good. Do you need me to bring anything?”

  “No, just your appetite.”

  After hanging up with him, she walked back into the kitchen where Isabel was still cutting up stuff at the counter. Isabel looked up at her.

  “I hope you’re hungry. It’s clean-out-the-fridge day.”

  “Again?” Valerie walked over to the stove. “What smells so good?”

  “Those party weenies we had left over from the bridal shower.”

  Valerie took one out of the bar-b-q sauce they were simmering in with a fork and bit it. “Mmm, I thought we’d left all the leftovers at my dad’s house.”

  Valerie had thrown Sarah an all-girl bridal shower at her dad’s house a few weeks ago. She’d hoped it would it would be enough and maybe they wouldn’t throw any other showers where she’d inevitably have to see Alex. But Angel’s family was party crazy, and went ahead with their enormous co-ed shower anyway.

  “Your step-mom dropped this off today, said your dad is not supposed to be eating this stuff anymore.”

  Valerie grabbed a water out of the fridge and sat down on one of the bar stools in front of the counter, facing Isabel.

  Isabel had all kinds of goodies out. Once a week, she cleaned out the fridge, throwing out all the bad stuff. She then cooked and cut up anything about to go bad. Between her and Valerie, they got rid of it all.

  “I’m surprised you’re not with Romero tonight.”

  “He wanted me to come over but… I dunno. I just don’t want to overdo it with him.”

  “Isabel, I thought you liked him?”

  “I do. That’s what scares me.”

  “Why?” Valerie frowned. “It’s a good thing he wants to be around you so much. He’s a good guy.”

  “I know. I know.” Isabel continued cutting cucumbers. “I’ve just never been with anyone like him. He’s so different from all the overly polished guys I usually go out with. He’s raw, and he doesn’t care about being politically correct. He says things like he sees them, all bullshit aside. For someone who’s so up front and open, he hasn’t mentioned anything about a relationship yet. What if this is just a fun thing for him? I’m having fun, but I’m afraid to put my heart out there like that until I know for sure he’s serious.”

  “Oh, he seems serious to me.” Valerie popped a couple of cheese cubes in her mouth.

  “I’m just slowing it down a little, before I get too far gone.” Isabel shrugged and gave Valerie a weak smile.

  Valerie didn’t push it. She knew Isabel was being her usual self, over-thinking everything. Instead, she changed the subject. “Luke’s making me dinner tomorrow.”

  Isabel glanced up from her cutting. “Really? So, things are getting serious? I’m glad, Valerie.”

  Valerie filled her in about the nightmare at the restaurant. She’d been so close to giving in to him again. She knew Isabel was rooting for things to take off with her and Luke.

  “It’s just dinner, Isabel. What’s so serious about that?”

  “A man doesn’t cook dinner for just anyone.” Isabel said and continued her cutting. “Heck, most men don’t cook period. Plus it’s what happens after dinner that makes it so serious.”

  Isabel put the plate of cucumbers she just finished cutting in front of Valerie. Valerie grabbed one and shook her head. “Nothing’s happening.”

  “You don’t know that.”

  “Yes, I do,” Valerie insisted.

  “Why? It’s been a few weeks now. And you know him well enough to know it’s not going to be a one-nighter. I thought you liked this guy?”

  “I do but… ” Valerie jumped off the bar stool and put the water back in the fridge. She’d had a long day and deserved a glass of wine. Plus Isabel made her nervous. Maybe Luke did expect something to happen tomorrow.

  Isabel stopped cutting and turned around to watch Valerie pour herself a glass of wine. “But Alex, right?”

  Valerie didn’t look at her. “No.”

  “Pour me a glass too. And you’re lying.”

  “I’m not lying.” Valerie pulled out another glass from the cabinet.

  “You always avoid eye contact when you lie, Val. You’re doing it now.”

  Valerie turned to look at her and handed her the glass with a smirk. “I hate you.”

  Isabel took the glass but frowned. “Valerie, you were doing so well. You can’t let a couple of run-ins with him pull you all the way back. These are all tests. You have to get through them.”

  Valerie sipped her wine and frowned. “I had no idea being near him would be so hard. I really thought I was over him, but… ”

  Isabel shook her head. “Honey, I won’t speak badly of Alex. I know how much he means to you, but he’s done you wrong so many times. I really think you should give Luke a shot. You finally kissed another man. Maybe finally sleeping with someone else will help you move on. What’s the worse that can happen?”

  “I’ve slept with other guys since I met Alex.”

  “Doesn’t count. That was back in your early party college days. And you were still in denial about actually being in love with Alex.”

  Valerie sat back down and thought about it. It was true. It’d been so long since she even considered sleeping with someone else. What was the worst thing that could happen? She really had to move on. She couldn’t go on putting it off forever. Because she kn
ew that’s how long it would be before she got over Alex.

  “You really think it would help?” She sipped her wine again.

  “I really do. I hate to say this, Val, but I’m sure Alex has been moving on, again and again, since you two have been apart.”

  That hurt, but Valerie knew it was true. “What if Luke isn’t even thinking like that?”

  Isabel sipped her wine and gave her a look. “Are you kidding?”

  Valerie giggled. “You think I should wear anything special?”

  Isabel smiled big, thrilled that Valerie was actually considering it. “I’m sure you have plenty to choose from. You can’t go wrong with black satin, though.”

  Valerie felt her insides churning.

  “To moving on.” Isabel held out her wine glass.

  Valerie clinked it with her glass. “To moving on.”

  She was really moving on. Somehow, she thought she’d feel more excited or at the very least relieved. Something heavy settled in her stomach as she took a sip of her wine. But it wasn’t relief and most certainly not excitement.

  CHAPTER 9

  The next day Valerie didn’t make it to the office until after noon, because she had clients she had to meet in the morning. When she arrived, Luke motioned for her to come into his office. The moment he closed the door behind her, he greeted her with one of the most sensual kisses he’d given her to date. It took her by surprise, and left her a bit breathless. But as usual she didn’t feel much else.

  “What’s that about?” She turned to make sure the blinds on his office windows were closed all the way. They were, but if someone really wanted to they could easily see through the small opening between the blinds.

  “I just missed you.” He smiled and kissed her neck. “I hardly saw you yesterday.”

  Valerie pulled away a little. “Luke, I don’t think this a good idea. Not here.”

  He gave her another peck and then backed off. “All right, I’m sorry. I’ll have to control myself.”

  He walked back around to his desk and picked up a file. “I have a few things here for you.”

  “What?”

  He pointed at some files on his desk. “A couple of cash buyers, looking to buy something fast.”

  Valerie stared at him. “Aren’t those supposed to get passed around the office?”

  Luke shrugged. “It’s just a couple. You’re the fastest and most efficient. I need this done yesterday. I don’t want to waste my time with those slackers. It’s no big deal.”

  Valerie took the files and read them. They were both looking to buy commercial buildings and had big budgets. She didn’t feel comfortable with this. If anyone in the office found out, they might accuse Luke of playing favorites.

  “You think you can get a list together and set up something by next week?”

  “Yeah, sure.” She started to walk toward the door.

  “Hey,” Luke said. “Is sevenish okay for tonight? I’m gonna try to get out of here earlier than normal. I’m a good cook just not very fast.”

  “Yeah, that’s fine.” Valerie still wasn’t one hundred percent sure about tonight. She’d just play it by ear.

  She walked to her cubicle and pulled out her laptop. The envelope on the screen of her phone when she set it down reminded her of the unheard message from Alex.

  She stared at it for a second before picking up the phone and dialing her voicemail. Her heart fluttered when she heard his deep voice. Every word he said made her heart race faster. Then she felt the knot at her throat when she heard the words, “Please tell me you haven’t given up on us.”

  Taking a deep breath, she saved the message. She knew she should just delete it, but there was no way. God, how did he do that? One message and she was close to tears. She missed being with him so much and hearing his voice made her miss him even more. He sounded so sincere. He always did. There was no way she could concentrate now. Valerie glanced at the time. She hurried outside with her phone and immediately dialed Isabel.

  This was Isabel’s hour between classes. She paced outside until Isabel answered.

  “What’s up?” Isabel chirped.

  “He left a message.”

  “Who?”

  “Alex.”

  She heard Isabel exhale. “And?”

  “Isabel, it sounded so sincere.” Valerie pulled her hair behind her ear and moved the phone to her other ear. “He said he hopes I haven’t given up on us.”

  “Val, hon, he always sounds sincere. We’ve been over this a million times. He has a huge ego. Always has. He can’t stand the thought of you with someone else, but he’ll never be a one woman guy.”

  Valerie’s heart was still pounding with excitement from his words. “I don’t know, Isabel. I’ve never heard him like this. You think… you really think it’s just wishful thinking on my part?”

  “I know it is. This is the longest you’ve been away from him. He must be feeling the weight of it, too. Seeing you with someone else, I’m sure, is contributing to this sudden urge to be with you. But you know what’ll happen if you go back again.”

  Valerie nodded. “Yeah, I know. I want you to hear it though when I get home tonight.”

  Isabel took a deep breath. “Okay, but you’re not backing out on tonight.”

  “No, I won’t.” Not the dinner anyway. She was still on the fence about the rest of the evening.

  She finished the list of properties to show in a matter of minutes. Then she called Sarah to let her know the offer had been accepted on the property next door to the restaurant. She begged her to please let Alex know and she’d update them on the escrow. As unprofessional as she knew that was, there was no way she was calling him directly.

  After hanging up, she left early without even saying goodbye to Luke. She’d see him tonight. There’d been plenty of times she rushed out of the office without saying goodbye to him. She didn’t want to start any habits now. But mostly, she was avoiding any possible embraces. It was happening already. Just hearing Alex’s message had begun to affect the way she felt about her relationship with Luke.

  Back home, she did everything she could to keep her mind off the message. But she couldn’t fight the urge to listen to it just one more time. She hated to admit it but it made her feel good. Too good. That damn lingering hope was back. As much as she told herself he would never change, something about the way he sounded in the message stood out to her. He’d always been good about pleading his case in the past, but this time he sounded almost desperate.

  Damn it, Valerie. Stop it.

  As soon as Isabel got home, Valerie rushed to her with her phone in hand.

  “Okay, just listen to the message, and tell me what you think. But be open minded.”

  Isabel put her things down on the counter and peered at Valerie. “Really? One message and you’re acting like this?”

  “C’mon, Isabel.” Valerie dangled the phone in front of her. “Just listen to it.”

  Valerie dialed the voicemail and hit the prompts until Alex’s message was about to start. She put it against Isabel’s ear and watched Isabel’s unreadable expression closely. But when it was over she frowned.

  “Valerie, I don’t doubt for a second that he misses you. But what exactly is it that you’re supposed to not give up on? The possibility that he may one day, be able to be with just one woman? That’s pretty selfish, don’t you think?”

  Valerie listened and watched as Isabel gathered her things from the counter. She followed her into her room and sat on the bed while Isabel put every little thing back in its place. She even had a holder on her dresser for her sunglasses.

  “So, you really don’t think it’s any different than all the other times?”

  “Honey, the only difference is that you’ve stuck to your guns longer this time than all the others, and most importantly that he knows you’re seeing someone else now. He’s probably missing you more than he ever has before, and you can hear it in his voice. But I wouldn’t get my hopes up.”
r />   Isabel was right, and Valerie knew it. She forced herself to get ready for her dinner with Luke. She remembered the way he kissed her today. She hadn’t felt much, but he definitely knew what he was doing. Maybe tonight wouldn’t be so bad.

  *

  Friday nights weren’t as busy as the weekend, but Alex was helping out in the kitchen because two of his cooks called in. This wasn’t the first time these two called in on a Friday night. He’d find replacements for those two bums soon enough.

  He walked out of the kitchen and into the office. Angel was there, working on the computer. Alex looked around to make sure Sarah wasn’t within earshot. “Sarah here?”

  Angel looked up at him. “No, why?”

  He’d been dying to ask all week, and he couldn’t hold back anymore

  “Has she said anything about Valerie?”

  “Yeah, I thought Sal told you. They accepted the offer. Escrow opened up today.”

  Sal had told him, but that’s not what Alex wanted to know. “Yeah, he told me. I already made an appointment for the contractor to come out when it closes to give us an estimate on the work and how long it’s going to take.”

  “Cool.” Angel turned back to the computer. “Valerie found us this place over by the marina for the restaurant. Sarah fell in love with the location. Check this out.”

  Angel moved over so Alex could see the pictures on the screen. Angel scrolled through shots of an abandoned old seafood restaurant, but it was right on the marina. That’s usually all that was out there, seafood. Top quality too. Alex wasn’t sure how Well, their Mexican cuisine would hold up on the marina, although they did have quite a bit of seafood on their menu.