Berlin Alexanderplatz
Behind closed doors they are hearing cases. Domestic employee Wilma, how do you spell that, I thought it was with a V, it is here, well, we’ll try it with a W. She was impertinent, she cheeked us, all right, pack your things and get out, that’s why we have witnesses. She refuses, she has too much of a sense of honour. All right, I am prepared to pay you up until the 6th, three days’ notice, that’s a further 10 marks, my wife is in hospital. You may claim, Fräulein, that 22.75 is the sum at issue, but there are things I won’t stand for. ‘Mean bitch,’ and so forth, we can call my wife as witness once she is up and about, the plaintiff expects to be rewarded for her insolence. The parties come to the following agreement.
Papke the chauffeur and the film distributor Wilhelm Totzke. What’s this one about, someone has just put it down on the table. Please write down: film distributor Wilhelm Totzke appeared in person, no, I’ve just got power of attorney from him, all right, and you were working for him as his driver, for a relatively short period, yes, I hit it, give me the keys, so you were involved in a motor vehicle accident, what do you have to say for yourself? It was Friday the 28th, he was to collect the boss’s wife from the Admiralsbad, it was in Viktoriastrasse, there are witnesses who can confirm that he was blind drunk. He’s widely known as a drunkard. I don’t drink bad beer; the car was a German make, the repairs came to 387.20. Can you describe the collision? I’m creeping forward, don’t have four-wheel brakes, graze his rear wheel with my front wheel. How much did you have to drink that day, you will have had something with your lunch, I went to the office and got given lunch, the boss looks after us very well because he’s such a nice fellow. We’re not pinning the damages on him either, just want to be allowed to sack him; because of his habitual drunkenness, he’s often been involved in collisions. Pick up your uniform; it’s in Viktoriastrasse in the dirt. And then the boss said over the phone: that big ape, he made a mess of my car. You couldn’t have heard that, oh yes, it was loud enough, the boss is uncouth; anyway he also claimed I’d stolen the spare wheel, I’d like to call witnesses. I wouldn’t dream of it, you are both equally to blame, your boss called you fool or ape, with your first name, you should agree to settle for 35 marks, it’s a quarter to twelve now, there’s plenty of time, you can call him, if need be he can be here for a quarter to one.
•
Outside the door down on Zimmerstrasse stands a girl who was just passing, she raises her umbrella and pops a letter in the box. The letter says: Dear Ferdinand, thanks for both of yours. I see I was mistaken about you, I never thought you would turn out like that. Well, you must admit yourself that we’re both very young to consider such a step. Maybe you thought I was like all the others, but then you made a mistake. Or did you think I was a good match? Then you’re mistaken too. I’m just a working-class girl. I’m telling you so you’ll know better next time. If I’d known what was going to happen, I’d never have started writing to you in the first place. Well, that’s what I think, take it on board, you’ll know what’s in your heart of hearts. Best wishes, Anna.
In the rear block at the same address, a girl is sitting in the kitchen; her mother’s gone out to do the shopping, the girl is keeping a secret diary, she’s twenty-six and unemployed. Her last entry of 10 July went: I felt a bit better in the afternoon, but the good days are so few and far between. There is no one I can talk to as I’d like to. That’s why I decided to put everything down on paper. When my condition hits me, I’m incapable of anything, the least little thing is extremely difficult for me. Everything I see when I’m in that state provokes new thoughts which I am unable to shake off, and then I’m agitated and have difficulty making myself do anything. I get terribly wound up, and still I can’t do anything. For instance: when I wake up early in the morning I don’t feel like getting up at all; but I make myself and I try to encourage myself. Even getting dressed is an effort, because so many things are going through my mind. I am continually obsessed with the idea of doing something badly, and causing damage. Even, when I put a piece of coal in the fire and cause a spark to jump up, I take fright, and have to check and see that nothing has caught, in case I’ve ruined something and caused a conflagration. And that’s how it is all day long: everything I am required to do seems terribly difficult, and when I make myself achieve it, in spite of trying to be quick about it, it seems to take for ever. So the day passes, and I don’t do anything, because every little action demands so much thought. When, in spite of all my efforts, I still can’t cope, then I fall into despair and cry. I have always suffered from this condition, the first time it appeared in my life I was only sixteen. My parents took it all for play-acting. When I was twenty-four I tried to end my life, but I was rescued. At that time I hadn’t had sex yet, and I put all my faith in that, unfortunately. I have only had a little, and recently I’ve given it up, because I feel physically so weak.
14 August. For the past week I’ve been doing very badly again. I don’t know what will become of me if it stays like this. I think if I was alone in the world I would turn on the gas tap without another thought, but I can’t do that to my mother. I really hope I get a grave illness which will carry me of. I have written everything down the way I really feel it.
The duel begins! It continues rainy
But for whatever reason (I kiss your hand, madam, I do), for whatever reason, let me think, let me think, Herbert in felt slippers thinks in his room, and it’s raining, plick plock plick plock, it’s impossible to go outside, he’s out of cigars and there’s no cigar seller in the building, for whatever reason it only ever rains in August, the whole month is awash, it floats away from you, so for whatever reason Franz has taken to going to Reinhold and will talk about nothing else? (I kiss your hand, madam, and no less a person than Sigrid Onegin delighted listeners with her singing, till he gave up, bet his life and so won it back). He will know why, he will, and it’s raining all the time, he can come here if he likes.
‘Christ, Herbert, why are you racking your brains about that. Just be pleased he’s left politics, maybe it’s because he’s got his friend back.’ ‘Come on, Eva, his friend. Start making sense, I know better than that. He wants something from him, he wants something—’ (The sale has been approved by the board, so the price must be viewed as reasonable.) ‘He wants something and whatever it is he wants and why, he goes round there, and keeps talking about it: he wants something from there! He wants to ingratiate himself, mark my words, Eva, and once he’s in there, he’ll go “bang bang” and no one will know it was him.’ ‘D’you reckon?’ ‘Don’t you?’ The thing is clear, I kiss your hand, madam, shame about the rain. ‘Of course, sugar, of course.’ ‘Do you really think so, Herbert? It seems a bit weird to me, him getting his arm took off, and then going up to see him.’ ‘Sure. We got it.’ I kiss. ‘Herbert, are you sure, do you think we shouldn’t say a word to him, just as though we were completely blind and hadn’t noticed anything?’ ‘We’re like camels, you can do anything with us.’ ‘Yes, Herbert. That’s the right way to be with him, we’ll do that, we’ve got to. He’s such a strange man.’ The purchase, admittedly by the government, so that the price achieved, for whatever reason, think, think, the rain.
‘Listen, Eva, keeping shtum is one thing, but we still need to pay attention. What if Pums’s people smell a rat? Well?’ ‘That’s what I’ve been saying, oh Lord, how can he go there with one good arm?’ ‘Because it’s good. But we need to keep our eyes peeled, and Mitzi’s too.’ ‘I’ll tell her. What can we do?’ ‘Not let Franz out of our sight.’ ‘Just hope her gentleman gives her a moment.’ ‘In that case she’d do better getting rid of him.’ ‘He’s talking about marriage.’ ‘Hahaha. I need to catch my breath. What does he want? What about Franz?’ ‘It’s nonsense, of course, she lets him run his mouth, why not.’ ‘She’d be better advised to watch Franz. He’s going to track down the gang member responsible, and mark my words, someone will be driven up here in a dead condition.’ ‘Oh, Herbert, how can you.’ ‘Christ, Eva, I’m not sayin
g it’s Franz. But Mitzi needs to keep an eye on him.’ ‘I’ll see to it. But you know something, this seems much worse to me than politics ever was.’ ‘You don’t get it. Women don’t get these things. Eva, I tell you, Franz is getting going. He’s on the way.’
I kiss your hand, madam, forced his life, won his life by gambling it, have you ever known an August like it, look at it, pissing down all the time.
•
‘What’s he want here? He’s mad, I told him he’s barking, if you’ve just got one arm, and you turn up here, and you want to be a player. And he.’ Pums: ‘Well, what did he say?’ ‘What he says? Oh, he’s laughing and grinning, he’s not all there, I think he must have taken some brain damage as well. First off, I can’t believe what I’m hearing. Really, I ask him. With one arm? Well why not, he grins, there’s enough strength in the one he’s got, I should try him, he can lift weights and shoot and even climb with it if he has to.’ ‘So it’s true?’ ‘See if I care. I don’t like him. Do we really want someone like that? Someone like you, Pums, you need workers. But when I see his ox’s head, I think I’ve had enough.’ ‘Well, if you say so. Fine by me. I gotta go now, Reinhold. Get hold of a ladder.’ ‘But make it a good strong one. Steel or something. Adjustable, folding, kind of thing. And not here in Berlin.’ ‘Suck eggs.’ ‘And the burner. From Hamburg or Leipzig.’ ‘I’ll get on to it.’ ‘And how are we going to get it here?’ ‘Let that be my concern.’ ‘I’m not having him, Franz, all right?’ ‘Reinhold, where Franz is concerned, I think he’s just a burden on us, but we’re not bothered either way, do what you want.’ ‘Now hold on a minute, do you think his face fits? Picture it: I throw him out of the car, and then he climbs the stairs to see me, and I’m thinking: there’s something not right in that man’s head, he’s standing there, imagine, what a camel, and he’s shaking, and what possesses that camel to climb my stairs. And then he starts gurning at me, and he’s mad keen to be in the group.’ ‘Sort it out with him. Whatever you decide is fine. Gotta go.’ ‘Maybe he wants to turn us in?’ ‘Could be. Could be. You know, then the best thing is to keep the guy away, that’s best. Evening.’ ‘He’ll turn us in. Or sometime when it’s nice and dark, he’ll shoot us.’ ‘Evening, Reinhold, like I say, I gotta go. The ladder.’
Biberkopf is a muttonhead, but he’s after something. He’s playing the innocent. Wants to tangle with me. But you’re mistaken if you think I’ll stand by and let you. I’ll trip you up. Schnapps, schnapps, schnabus, schnabus is good for giving you hot hands, it’s as well Aunt Paula is in bed eating tomatoes. A friend advised her. If he thinks I’m obliged to look after him, we’re not an insurance company here. If he’s got one arm, then let him go and cut coupons for all I care. (Pads around and looks at the flowers.) So I got flowerpots and the woman gets 2 marks on the first of the month to water them, just look at the state of them, blooming Sahara. Silly cow, bitch, only good for swallowing money. I’m gonna have to pull the worms out of her nose. Another – don’t mind if I do. That’s something he taught me. Maybe I’ll take his girl, hey, that’s not a bad idea. Probably thinks I’m afraid of him. You’d like that. Oh, I’ll have him. It’s not about the money, no chance of that, he’s got his Mitzi, and then there’s his mate Herbert, the old windbag, the ram, he’s sitting pretty in their sty over there. Where’re my boots, I’ll break his legs. Let me give you a hug, mate. Closer, closer, to the penitent form, I’ve got a penitent form here where you can repent.
And he pads around his lat, pushes his finger in a flowerpot, 2 marks and the baggage doesn’t even water the flars. In the penitent form, sunshine, let’s have you. Salvation Army, I’ll have him go there and all, he needs to go round Dresdener Strasse, the penitent form there, that pig with his big staring eyes, the pimp, the animal, animal is what he is, up the front, praying, and me pissing myself watching.
•
And why shouldn’t Franz Biberkopf go to the penitent form? Is the penitent form not the very place for him? Who says?
What can you say against the Salvation Army, and what’s Rein-hold doing, speaking out against it, when the man himself has been round the Dresdener Strasse, oh, five times at least, and in an indescribable state, and they helped him out. His tongue was hanging out his throat, and they fixed him up, of course not so that he could pursue his life of villainy.
Hallelujah, hallelujah, Franz has heard it, the song, the call. The knife was pressed against his throat, Franz, hallelujah. He offers his throat, he wants to seek his life, his blood. My blood, my innermost, at last it’s coming out, it was a long journey till it came, God, it was difficult, there it is, I’ve got you now, why did I not want to go in the penitent form, if only I’d been there earlier, ah, here I am arrived at last.
Why shouldn’t Franz go in the penitent form, when will the blest moment come when he throws himself down before his terrible death and opens his mouth and sings with the many flanking him:
Come, o sinner, come to Jesus, do not hesitate, wake up, tethered victim, come to the light, thou shalt know complete salvation, even today, o believe, and then light and joy will come. Chorus: For the victorious saviour, he breaks every band and leads to victory with mighty hand, and leads to victory with mighty hand. Music! Blare, crash, chingdaradada: He breaks every band and leads to victory with mighty hand. Tara, tari, tara! Boom! Chingdaradada.
Franz doesn’t give up, gets no peace, he’s philosophizing like a drunk. He slinks around Reinhold’s pad with the rest of the Pums gang, who are unhappy about him being there. But Franz lashes out, brandishes his one remaining fist and yells: ‘If you don’t believe me, if you think I’m here to cheat you and deliver you to justice, then forget it. What do I need you for if that’s what I have in mind? I can go back to Herbert or whoever any time I like.’ ‘Well go on then.’ ‘Go on then! You ape, telling me to “go on then”. Take a look at my arm, you. Reinhold, over there, projected me out of the car. I survived that and now I’m here and it’s not for you to say “go on then”. If I’m here with you and I say: I’m in, then you need to understand who Franz Biberkopf is. He’s never cheated anyone in his life, ask around. I don’t give a shit about what happened, the arm’s gone, I know you, this is where I work, and this is the reason why, so you understand.’ The little plumber still doesn’t get it. ‘Then explain why you want to be in, because back then you were flogging papers on the Alex, and nothing would induce you to join us.’
Franz settles himself in his chair and for a long time says nothing, and nor do they either. He has sworn to be decent, and you saw he stayed decent for weeks, but that was just a period of grace. He is involved in criminality, he doesn’t want to be, he resists it, it passes over his head, he has to do it. For a long time they sit there and don’t speak.
Then Franz says: ‘If you want to find out who Franz Biberkopf is, then go to the Landsberger Allee, there’s a woman’s grave in the cemetery there. I did four years for her sake. That was my good arm what did it. Then I went to flogging papers. I thought I’d go straight.’
And Franz moans softly, gulps: ‘My object lesson, see. When that happens to you, you have to give up newspapers and this and that and the other thing as well. That’s why I’m here.’ ‘So we’re expected to fix your arm coz we broke it.’ ‘That’s not in your power. It’s enough for me to be sitting here, Max, instead of trotting around on the Alex. I don’t make any reproaches to Reinhold, I never breathed a word, ask him. When I’m sitting in the car, and there’s a suspicious party sitting next to me, I know what I have to do. There’s to be no more talk of my foolishness. If you should do something stupid yourself, Max, then I hope you learn from it.’ With that Franz takes his hat and slopes off. That’s the way it is.
Inside, Reinhold is pouring himself a drink from his hip flask and saying: ‘Well, this whole thing is settled, so far as I’m concerned. I dealt with him the first time, I’ll deal with him next time as well. I know it’s taking a chance, getting involved with him. But first of all, he’s already in it
up to here: he’s a pimp, he says so himself, he’s not going straight anytime soon. There’s just the question: why’s he joining us, and not Herbert, who’s his friend. I dunno. I have a few ideas though. Any road, we’d be pathetic if we couldn’t manage to cope with Franz fucking Biberkopf. Let him join. If he plays up, he’ll get one on the noddle. I say right out: let him have a go.’ And so Franz has a go.
Franz breaking and entering, Franz not under the wheels, he’s in the box seat now, he’s made it
At the beginning of August the criminal classes are still enjoying rest and recreation, busy with holidays and what have you. If the weather is anything like, you wouldn’t take it upon yourself to break in or strain yourself – not if you know what you’re doing. Those are the things of winter, when a man’s gotta get out and about. Take Franz Kirsch, for instance, the celebrated safe-cracker, he and an accomplice broke out of Sonnenburg eight weeks ago, at the beginning of July. Sonnenburg sounds ever so nice, but it’s no use for r. and r., so instead he’s taken a nice holiday in Berlin, rested up for eight weeks, and his thoughts are maybe beginning to turn to the next job. Then there’s a complication, life’s like that. The fellow has to take the tram. The police show up, end of August time, in Reinickendorf West, pull him off the tram, and his holiday’s over, there’s no help for it. But there’s plenty of other fish in the sea, and they’re about to get busy.
I’d better supply the official weather forecast for Berlin. General atmospheric conditions: a high pressure zone to the west has now spread over central Germany, and brought about an improvement in the outlook. The southern edge of the high pressure area is already fraying. So we anticipate that the improvement will not last. But up until Saturday the high will dominate the weather, and we will have it pretty fine. Then a depression currently over the Iberian peninsula will move north-east and begin to affect German conditions on Sunday.