Ballad (Rockstar #5)

  “I’ve thought of it but the minute I bring it up, she shuts me down. She doesn’t want her family at risk from her dad and she doesn’t want him to find her either,” I confess.

  “Hmm. Let me put in a call to my gampy. I bet he’s got ways to keep that asshole of a sperm donor away from Nicole and her family.”

  “Yeah? You think he’ll help?” I ask.

  She laughs. “Do you forget who you’re talking to? I’m his Luciana who’s carrying his great-grandbabies. He’ll do anything to keep me from worrying and that’s the one thing in the world I want most. I want our Nicole well.”

  “Me too, Luce. Me too.”

  True to her word, Lucy asked Mama Russo to help with the wedding. The woman didn’t just help, she took over, thank Christ. I’m tired, so damn tired, and I think I’m getting an ulcer from this shitty coffee. Every now and again one of the nurses will bring me in some Starbucks and I couldn’t be more grateful.

  I mentioned this to Sera last night when I was too tired to be on guard, and today a new coffee maker and cappuccino machine were donated to every department of the hospital.

  Those sisters, they’re some damn great people. I hope someday I can pay back their kindness, but for now I’ll accept every gesture with humility because right now, things aren’t about me. They’re about Nicole and getting her through this so she can get well.

  “Are you ready to get married?” I ask Nicole, who’s got a sour look on her face.

  “In a hospital gown. Are you fucking kidding me?” she asks.

  “Swear jar!” we hear Xan shout from the other end of the computer.

  “Ugh.”

  “Honey. I get your frustration. I do. This isn’t what you imagined for your wedding day, and if you’d rather wait until we can have it just the way you want it, that’s okay with me,” I tell her. I’ll give her anything to bring back her smile that’s dimmed over the last few days.

  She sighs. “No, it’s okay. It doesn’t really matter what I’m wearing, right? Just that I’m vowing to love you for the rest of my life.”

  I have to swallow—hard. That selflessness, the fact that she loves me so fiercely. I shake my head, overcome with emotion.

  “Yeah, honey. That’s all that matters,” I agree, still choked up.

  “Besides,” Lucy calls out from the other end of the computer connection, “we’re going to throw you the perfect wedding when you’re well enough and these babies are born.”

  “Perfect,” Nicole agrees.

  The pastor we spoke with enters the room. “Do you have witnesses?”

  Nicole and I look over to the nurses who agreed to be our witnesses, but instead we find Sera and Cage.

  “Holy Hannah!” Nicole shouts, holding her arms out to Sera, who’s rushing over.

  “You didn’t really think we’d let you get married without one of us here, did you?” Sera asks.

  Nicole sniffles. “I—”

  “Never gonna happen,” Sera tells her, holding my girl while she cries happy tears.

  I mouth a thank you to Sera, who sends me a wink. This right here is what family’s all about. We’ll always do whatever it takes.

  “Ready?” Cage asks.

  I nod and Coley gives him a watery smile.

  “I’d cry too if I was marrying his ugly mug,” Jesse says.

  “That’d be incest,” Xander tells him. “That’s fu—fricking sick, dude.”

  “Not at all what I meant,” Jesse states.

  “Leave it to Xander,” Kenndy says.

  “True that,” Ethan agrees.

  Sera situates a veil on Nicole’s head and hands her a bouquet. Her gasp is loud and has everyone looking over.

  “What is it?” I ask.

  “White roses. They were my mom’s favorite.” She looks up at Sera from her wheelchair. “How did you know?”

  Sera glances at Cage. “Let’s just say we have some pretty good detectives in the family.”

  “Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today in the sight of God…” Pastor Bingham begins. I gaze into the eyes of the woman I love with everything I am, the woman I’m about to make my wife, and I know without a doubt she’s my forever.

  Is this a dream? I’m sitting here, staring into the eyes of Ben Kingston, the man who steals my breath with just a look, the man who stole my heart just as easily, and we’re about to exchange marriage vows. I’m about to be his wife.

  I can’t stop the smile and he smiles back. “Sunshine,” he whispers.

  “Do you, Nicole Alexandra Harper, take this man, Jamison Benjamin Kingston, to be your lawfully wedded husband? In sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, until death do you part?” Pastor Bingham asks.

  “I do, but for much longer than that,” I answer.

  “She’s gonna stalk his ass from the grave,” Xander says with a laugh.

  “Dude,” Kennedy scolds.

  “Jeez,” Xan replies, properly chastised. “Sorry.”

  “Do you, Jamison Benjamin Kingston, take this woman, Nicole Alexandra Harper, to be your lawfully wedded wife? In sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, until death do you part?”

  Ben’s eyes shine with unshed tears as he nods. “I do. For so much longer than that.”

  “Glad you both agree on that,” the pastor teases. Ben and I smile wider.

  “If you have the rings?”

  Ben nods and I can only look on as this marvelous man produces rings for each of us, handing mine to Cage.

  “Nicole, repeat after me. With this ring, I thee wed.”

  I slide the platinum band with beautiful etching onto his left ring finger. “With this ring, I thee wed.” I peer up at him through my lashes and he looks so serious, as serious as this moment is.

  Cage hands Ben the rings.

  “Ben, repeat after me,” Pastor Bingham begins. “With this ring, I thee wed.”

  Ben looks into my eyes, then down at my fingers as he slides the rings on. I don’t care if he got me a ring out of a Cracker Jack box, all I care about are the emotions shining in his eyes as he says these six words.

  “With this ring, I thee wed.”

  His gaze locks with mine and I blink back tears.

  “By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss your bride.”

  “Holy Hannah!” I squeal just before Ben’s lips meet mine in a possessive, breath-stealing kiss.

  “Better check her blood pressure!” Meggie shouts and everyone laughs.

  “I now present to you, Mr. and Mrs. Ben Kingston!” Pastor Bingham announces happily and I pull Ben down for another kiss.

  When we pull back he rests his forehead against mine.

  “Hi wife.”

  My breath catches and I smile. “Hi husband.”

  “Oh, that’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen,” Lucy says as she begins to cry. “It’s hormones.”

  “No, it’s not,” a bunch of them say at the same time.

  “Bullies,” she teases.

  Someone turns music on at their end of the connection, and Sera nudges Ben.

  “Dance the first dance with your wife, Benny,” she teases with a wink.

  He points at her, but can’t hide his smile.

  I stand on wobbly legs and Ben helps me, holding me close to him.

  “Stand on my feet, honey. I’ll do all the hard stuff so you don’t tire yourself out,” Ben whispers.

  “You always know,” I tell him.

  He nods. “I always will.”

  “I’m going to hold you to that.”

  “Good. Now hop on these size twelves and let’s dance our first dance as husband and wife.”

  I step onto his feet, swaying a little as dizziness washes over me.

  “I got you, honey,” Ben tells me. “I’ll hold you up.”

  “Just hold me close and let me try to take in this perfect moment,” I say. “You’re my husband,” I whisper.

  He nods. “You’re my wife.”

&nbs
p; I nod.

  “If you think the press had a fun time with Jesse and Lucy, imagine what’s going to happen with Ben and Nicole,” Jace mutters.

  “I heard that,” I announce, “and I don’t care.”

  “Me neither,” Ben agrees. “There are more important things in the world to focus on than what the press and the people out there who don’t know us think about our lives, which are none of their business to begin with.”

  “Wow. He said a mouthful there,” Megs says.

  “Every word the truth,” Trace states.

  There’s cake and sparkling cider—ginger ale for me.

  “How are you two going to consummate the marriage?” Ethan asks.

  “Ethan! Of all people!” I state with shock. “I expected that from Xander, but not you.”

  “Nice, dude,” Xan tells him and they fist bump.

  Ben looks into the camera. “This is one of those things you don’t need to know.”

  “Daaamn,” Xan starts. “Ben’s got plans.”

  “Knock it off,” Kennedy chides. “That’s my little sister you’re talking about. Respect.”

  Xan’s mouth snaps closed. “Respect.”

  I fight the yawn that threatens to escape, but it beats me. Ben smiles softly down at me.

  “Time for a nap?” he asks.

  I nod. “I think so.”

  “I’m glad you don’t hide anything from me, Nicole. About how you’re feeling, I mean.”

  “There’s no point in that. You’re right here with me, seeing it all, experiencing it all with me. I won’t hide from you, Ben,” I tell him.

  “Good. You’ll never have to.”

  “Did you find out anything?” Sera asks.

  “I did.”

  “Is it good news or bad?”

  I press a kiss to her forehead. “It’s good. Her aunt is alive.”

  “Oh, that’s fantastic!”

  I nod. “It is.”

  Sera’s smile fades. “What’s wrong?”

  “I understand now why she chose to protect her aunt and her family.”

  “Tell me, babe.”

  “Her aunt is married to Frank,” I tell her.

  “Frank who?” she asks.

  That was my first instinct too when Gio told me. I wait for it to sink in and it doesn’t take long.

  “Our Frank,” she whispers.

  I nod.

  Her eyes narrow. “Gampy knew.”

  I nod again.

  “You’re as pissed as I am,” she states.

  I nod yet again. I’m more than pissed. How he could have kept something like this from me…

  “He knew the whole time?” she asks.

  “Yep.”

  “He set this up?”

  I nod.

  “But how could he know Lucy would pick her email out of all the rest?” my Fee asks.

  “It was simple really. He had someone change the color of the text in the subject line to pink and added flowers and hearts as well,” I tell her, biting back my anger at his manipulation of Lucy.

  “He…”

  I nod grimly and she clamps her mouth shut.

  “My gampy’s in for a world of hurt when Lucy finds out.”

  “He certainly is.”

  “BEN.”

  “Yeah, honey.”

  I’m lying next to my wife in her hospital bed and there are only a couple hours left before she has to undergo more treatment.

  “I want you to touch me,” Nicole whispers and my eyes snap open.

  “Nicole, you’re not well enough for that,” I say softly.

  “Don’t you want me?” she asks, the insecurity coming through loud and clear.

  “Beautiful wife of mine,” I tell her, cupping her cheek in my hand, the sliver of light shining in through a crack in the blinds not high enough so I can see her face, but merely a shadow. “I want nothing more than to touch you and take you and fuck you until you’re screaming my name, but I really don’t want you to do something that could set back your treatment.”

  She blows out a breath. “The nurses left us alone tonight for a reason, Ben.”

  I nod. “I know, I do. I’m just afraid of doing something…”

  “I know what you’re saying, but if I just lay here and promise not to exert myself in any way, shape, or form, will you officially make me your wife?” she asks.

  God, I know she’s so tired and she feels like hell. If I deny her… I can’t deny her.

  “You can’t move,” I tell her, leaning in to kiss her lips. “This is going to be sweet, slow, and easy.”

  “Mhm. Okay.”

  I kiss her neck, licking and sucking, making her breath catch when I get to those sweet spots she has. I raise the hospital gown up to bare her breasts. I can’t see them, but I know what they look like. I close my eyes, remembering as I gently squeeze and she moans softly. I replace my hand with my mouth, sucking on her nipple, biting it lightly before licking it quickly with the tip of my tongue.

  “More,” she asks, and I give it.

  I slide my hand down her body between her legs.

  I groan. “Damn. You’re already so wet.”

  “It’s you. You do that,” she pants as I slip a finger inside her tight pussy. My dick gets hard remembering how snug it is when I’m fucking her, how her pussy clamps down so hard when she comes it makes it impossible for me not to come with her.

  “I want you to come for me just like this.” I add another finger and she sinks back into the bed.

  “Oh yes,” she says when I press the heel of my hand against her clit, moving it in time with my fingers.

  “Do you like that, Nicole? Do you like it when I finger you?” I ask, remembering how she told me dirty talk got her off.

  “Mmm,” she moans.

  “If you like it that much, you should reward me for giving you what you like. You should let go and come on my fingers so when you’re done I can stick them in my mouth to taste your release,” I say soft and low against her ear.

  Her breath hitches and her body starts to shake.

  “There you go. Let me know I please you, wife,” I demand. “Come for me, Nicole.”

  I thrust my fingers faster, then curve them ever so slightly, and she’s flying. I smother her cries of pleasure with my kiss. As her pussy spasms around my fingers it’s all I can do not to thrust into the bed until I come with her. It’s been long enough that it wouldn’t take much.

  I pull down my joggers and boxer briefs, kicking them to the floor.

  We lie there facing one another and I trace a finger down her cheek. “Tell me if it becomes too much.”

  “I will. Promise.”

  I nod then lift her leg over my hip. I grab my cock and place it at her opening. It kills me, but I push in slowly, her wetness surrounding me, her heat enveloping me.

  “You feel so fucking good,” I tell her.

  “Oh Ben,” she whispers. “Don’t stop.”

  “I don’t think I could stop if the fucking building was on fire,” I admit. She snickers. I don’t. I want her with a fierceness I’ve never felt before. It’s not just the physical, it’s the emotional, the coming together as man and wife for the first time. It’s me wanting to claim and mark her as mine.

  Slowly I work my cock further and further inside her. When I’m completely inside her I let out a sigh.

  “I love you, Nicole.”

  “I love you, Ben.”

  “Now you’re mine completely.”

  “I was already yours, love.”

  It’s the second time she’s called me that and I fucking love it. I hold her hips as I thrust into her pussy, my cock growing with each thrust. I am not going to come without her. No fucking way. Not this time, when it’s this important.

  “You okay?” I ask.

  “Mmm. Yes,” she moans.

  “Good. I need you to come now. I can’t last much longer,” I admit.

  “Yes,” she whispers, her hands gripping my shoulders. I lean fo
rward, burying my face in her neck, listening to her soft cries of pleasure as I pump into her, and when I start circling her clit with my finger, she holds her breath.

  “Breathe, honey.” I reposition myself so her face is against my chest and she holds her mouth against it, moaning as she gets wetter and hotter, bringing me close to the edge. Way too close to the edge.

  I use two fingers on her clit, circling faster, her breath coming in shallow pants, her pussy tightening around my cock. I let out a groan.

  “Fuck. I can’t hold back,” I tell her, turning her to her back and fucking her faster, harder. Less than a minute later she shatters apart in my arms, her pussy gripping my cock so tight as she bites into my chest to muffle her cries of pleasure.

  “God damn it,” I whisper. A few thrusts more and I’m coming inside my wife. That thought alone has me spiraling higher, the pleasure so intense I have to bite my lip from shouting.

  “Son of a bitch,” I say when the last bit of cum shoots out my dick, draining me completely. I roll to my side, bringing her with me.

  She’s too quiet.

  “Did I hurt you? Please say I didn’t hurt you,” I whisper, touching her face.

  “You didn’t hurt me. You could never hurt me,” she says as she sniffs.

  “Honey, please, don’t cry. Whatever it is, I’ll make it better. I promise.” Panic flows through me. I hate when she cries, it hurts me to see her cry, and I want to fix it.

  She snickers. “There’s nothing, Ben. It was just intense.”

  “It was,” I admit, getting up from the bed to get a washcloth. I gently clean between her legs, then toss the rag into the bathroom.

  I pull my boxer briefs and joggers back on before climbing back into bed.

  “Ben.”

  “Yeah, honey.”

  “Thank you.”

  “For what?”

  “For making today special,” she whispers drowsily.

  “I’ll do anything for you, Nicole. Whatever it takes to keep you smiling,” I whisper against her lips before I kiss her gently.

  “Forever,” she slurs.

  “Forever,” I reply. As I listen to her breathing as she sleeps, my mind drifts to what Sera told me about Frank and his wife. Will they help Nicole? I can’t imagine her aunt not helping, but if it means having their kids tested… that’s dicey right there. The kids are only ten and twelve. That’s so damn young.