We Were One_Looking Glass
“I had a visual just today when I realized I couldn’t stomach him touching or kissing me anymore, not after this weekend.” Going tense again as what she just said sunk in, I felt her fingers caress the side of my head, and just like that, I was able to breathe easily again. “Whose bike?”
“Some douche named Shane. I couldn’t stand the way that fucker looked at you.”
She smiled. “I know you don’t wanna hear about it, but after Ryan said ‘you’re mine’ to me one time and it set off a major trigger, he never said that phrase to me again.” She smirked, smoothing out what I knew was now a very active vein on my forehead. “I take it you used the phrase often?”
I’d had enough of the visuals of her and Ryan. Visuals of him claiming her after doing God knows what to her. She yelped when I flipped her over suddenly, a roar nearly escaping me as I brought a leg on either side of her. “All the time. You getting on anyone else’s bike, unless it was one of my brothers’ and absolutely necessary, was a total no-no after that day. Another one of our rules. Because you were—are—mine.”
Even as I let a growl out, taking her mouth in mine with all the passion I’d only ever felt for Madeline, the reality of what was happening finished sinking in as my body pressed against hers—something I never thought I’d feel again. I stopped kissing her and pulled away, burying my face in her neck. “You have no idea what losing you did to me, baby.”
It was all too much to hold in now as I let out the emotion against her neck: everything I’d felt this past weekend, the feelings of being torn between walking away from someone my heart was begging me not to, and now this—being here in the same bed with the love of my life, something I would’ve never believed in a million years I’d be doing again. The memories of what I felt that horrid day overwhelmed me suddenly. “It destroyed me.”
I kissed her neck then her chin and worked my way back to her mouth, and our eyes met. Even as I did my best to be strong, it couldn’t be helped. The thought of this not being real—of me just having lost my ever-loving mind and I’d soon wake from this—scared the life out of me. But it was still so impossible to wrap my head around this. “It’s over,” she whispered, wiping the damn tear that escaped the corner of my eye. “I’m here now. We’re together and will be forever.”
I kissed her again long and deep, as she squirmed underneath me and pulled my jeans down my hips. Between kisses and my sucking her neck, we got each other’s clothes off, and then she saw it. I’d been so caught up with everything else that was happening I’d never even stopped to consider the possibility of her remembering the massive tattoo on my chest. It was big as day: Madeline tattooed across my chest. The M was a sexy green M&M wearing black boots.
“Oh, my God,” she gasped softly, staring in awe and touching it. “God, I love you.”
“I worship you, baby,” I said, sprinkling kisses all over her face. “Always have. This is just one of many tattoos I have of you—us.”
The trail of kisses came to an end on her mouth. I devoured her lips and tongue until she was moaning softly and spreading her legs for me.
Positioning myself between her legs, I gulped hard because I thought I might lose it right there, so I had to warn her. “I can’t take my time, Maddie. I need to be inside you. I’m afraid this is all going to be over before I’ve had my chance.”
The moment the tip of my cock felt her glorious hot wet entrance, Madeline lifted her hips, welcoming me in, and it was all I could do to keep from groaning out loud as I slipped inside.
We wept together, even as she wrapped her arms around me tightly and swayed her hips along to match my thrusts. “I fucking love you.” I gasped against her ear as I buried myself deep into her, thrusting in and out again and again.
No one, I was sure of it, not a single person on this earth could possibly understand what we were feeling at that moment. It was as if I’d finally died and met her in heaven because it was where my body and soul were.
Heaven. Absolute heaven.
We continued to make love, our bodies in perfect rhythm as if we’d never left each other’s side for even a moment. Until we simultaneously experienced the most gratifying earth-shattering orgasms of our lives.
Even after we were done, we continued to weep and never once let go of each other. “I think it’s gonna be years or maybe even forever before I’ll truly believe this has happened,” I said, kissing her neck even as I struggled to catch my breath. “I’m gonna fear waking up and realizing it was just a cruel dream. Already, I’m afraid to fall asleep.” I rolled sideways to take in her gazing eyes in that way I knew I’d never get tired of. “I’ll probably lie awake all night just staring at you to make sure you don’t disappear.”
“Don’t say that.” She traced my lips with her finger. “I don’t think it’s possible for even a dream to capture this much emotion. Even in the dreams where Ryan pulled me away from you, as painful and emotional as it felt, nothing tops what I’m feeling now. I know I’ll feel it every day of my life with you from here on.”
“Every day,” I repeated, staring deeply into her eyes. “Because I don’t want a waste a single one now. We’ve lost enough time. So even whatever time it takes us to figure out who’s moving where and how we’re going to do this, I don’t wanna be away from you a single day.”
She smiled, despite the emotion I could see her trying to restrain. “I cannot wait for my life to start all over again.”
“It already has, baby,” I whispered, kissing the very spot where my beauty mark used to be then sucking it with a groan. “It already has.”
Epilogue
Madeline
The coughing in the living room followed by the moaning only made me want to giggle. But I dared not. Mama had warned me what big babies men can be when they’re sick, and I’d seen it more than once, but it’d never annoyed me the way it did her. Why they had to moan after every cough and sneeze I’d never know, but unlike Mama, who rolled her eyes when her fiancé Don did it, I thought it was hilarious.
Besides, I wouldn’t have dreamed of complaining when it came to taking care of Nico. He would have gallantly taken care of me if needed. Not that I’d ever gotten this bad when I was sick. But my entire pregnancy the man went above and beyond taking care of me. That last month when I was on strict bed rest orders, he catered to my every whim. And unlike when it was my turn to do the nursing, between him and Ama, I got some delicious real home cooking
“Who’s ready for some yummy warm chicken soup?” I asked as I walked into the living room, carrying a tray with a bowl of the hot soup, tea, some cough drops, and another box of tissues. “Don’t worry. I didn’t make it. It’s canned, but it’s still yummy.”
Careful not to spill any on him, I placed the tray on Nico’s lap where he was sitting on the ottoman. Even with a bad case of the man flu, his eyes were still breathtaking as he looked up at me with a dreary smile. “Thank you, baby.”
I smiled big, touching his forehead with the palm of my hand then kissing it. “You’re welcome, and I think your fever’s finally going down.”
Nolan, who was sitting on the other ottoman, coughed now too, and just like his brother, he followed it up with a moan. I refrained from laughing but looked up at him with a pout. “How ’bout you? You feeling hungry yet? There’s plenty more soup for you.”
He nodded, wiping his nose with a tissue. “Yeah, I’ll take some if it’s not too much trouble.”
“Not at all.” I smiled then turned to the real babies who’d knocked out in their baby swings just a few feet away from these two dying men. “How long have the twins been out?”
Both Nico and Nolan turned to them. “Oh, shit,” Nico said. “I hadn’t even noticed they were.”
“Then they probably just knocked out. Let me just get them in their cribs, and I’ll be right back with your soup, Nolan.”
“You know I’d help you, babe, but—”
“No, no, I got this,” I said, kissing my hubby’s forehead ag
ain as I walked past him. “You and Nolan just keep your germs right in those chairs.”
One by one, I took the babies out of their swings and got them settled in for the night in their room. Mattie boy nearly woke as I placed him down in his crib, but as usual, even through a diaper change, Maggie didn’t even bat an eye.
I knew from the moment I found out I was having twins and they were fraternal—a boy and a girl—that I’d love referring to my babies as Mattie and Maggie. Once the memories literally poured back into my brain during my pregnancy, I was a mess. I remembered everything from my past now except for the accident. It was the craziest thing. I could remember as far back as being a little girl. But as far as the accident, all I remembered from that day was we were riding happily and anxiously along on our way to the burger shack because we were all starving. Everything after that was blank, and the very next memory I had was of me waking in the hospital.
I wondered then and I still do if maybe God had a plan. Maybe my not remembering more about Maggie and my bestie was for the best until I was ready to have these precious babies. They really have gotten me through the pain now that I realized just how much I’d lost that day. While I still missed Maggie immensely, Ama and even Mama insisted a part of Maggie’s soul lives on in baby Maggie. While the thought somewhat consoled me, I still couldn’t help but wonder about all the what-ifs.
Would she have ended up with Nolan? Would she have babies now too? Would Nolan be home with her right now getting some real homecooked chicken soup versus my canned? The thought made me giggle bittersweetly, but it also reminded me of something else.
I kissed my babies goodnight and headed back to the kitchen. With Ama in Mexico for the week, visiting family, I insisted Nolan come stay with us while he got over his flu so I could take care of him along with Nico. Partly because I figured it was best to get him out of that house before all the Cortez men came down with the man flu. And partly because I was the one who gave the flu to Nico, who then passed it on to Nolan. So I felt slightly responsible. Though you would’ve never even known I’d had the flu.
As the simultaneous coughing followed by the loud moaning started up again in the front room, this time I couldn’t help but giggle.
“I heard that,” Nico called out, which only made me laugh more.
“You two are just too much.” I walked out with Nolan’s tray, squelching anymore giggling, but I couldn’t help but grin big when Nico peered at me, giving me that bad girl playful glare of his.
“Nolan’s probably faking it, but I’m really dying over here.”
“Shit,” Nolan protested as he took the tray, looking up at me. “Thank you, sweetheart.” He turned back to Nico again. “You’re milking it now. You should’ve been over it by now. I’m the one who’s at the height of this shit.”
“Alright, alright,” I said, patting Nolan’s head. “Let’s not start writing obituaries just yet. I think you’re both gonna make it.”
“Why is it that, every time you need Shana most, she disappears on your ass?” Nico asked then blew his nose.
As soon as I had his attention, I gave Nico a look because he knew better. Regardless of how he felt about Nolan’s on-and-off girlfriend, his brother and Shana had been together for over a year now. Sure, it’d been a shaky one, still it was none of our business.
“I didn’t get sick until after we broke up,” Nolan said. “Besides, I don’t need taking care of.” He pointed at me with a sweet smile. “Not that I don’t appreciate it, Maddie. It was very sweet of you to offer, but the only reason I’m here is because I didn’t want to get Dad sick.”
I nodded, agreeing immediately. It was the real reason. I was worried about the Cortez men coming down with the flu. Matteus, my father-in-law, had already been hospitalized once this year for pneumonia. He was a strong healthy man otherwise, but I’d have felt too guilty if he’d ended up in the hospital again because I got everyone sick.
Nolan got a phone call he said he needed to take outside and set his tray on the coffee table. But he had that look on his face, and I wasn’t sure if he was annoyed by Nico’s comment or about who was calling him. The moment he walked out of earshot, I gave Nico another scolding look.
“We’ve talked about this, honey.” I shook my head adamantly when he started to protest. “Unless it’s something constructive or something he needs to hear, we stay out of it. It’s not our business.”
Later that evening when my big baby was all tucked in bed, good and medicated so hopefully he’d have a better night than the last two, I slipped into bed next to him. But not before putting both our phones on silent and in the drawer. I knew my husband, and if I’d let him, he’d have stayed up going through all the emails and stuff he needed to catch up on since he’d been home sick. It was late and no one ever called at that hour, so everything else could wait until morning.
“So what are you thinking?” he asked, rubbing my tiny baby bump. “You think we got another set on the way?”
“God, I hope not.”
“What?” he asked, genuinely surprised. “But it’s so cool having two babies at once.”
“Yes,” I said, laughing as I curled into him. “But it won’t be just two babies anymore. It’ll be two babies and two toddlers who’ll be walking around and getting into everything. That’s a lot of work, babe. You think we’re tired now. Just wait ’til this one gets here. So yeah. If it is another set, we’ll make the best of it, of course, but I’m not exactly hoping for another one.”
He turned so he had a better grip around my waist and spooned me. “Well, I am. We have all these uncles more than willing to help with them, and none of those knuckleheads will be starting families any time soon.”
I giggled at that but kept anymore protesting about not wanting another set of twins to myself. Truth was, it didn’t matter what I wanted. It was out of my hands at that point. So I’d let him wish all he wanted. But now I was curious about something else we couldn’t talk about earlier.
“You really think things between Nolan and Shana are over for good?”
“I sure as fuck hope so. She cheated on him. His dumb ass better not take her back.”
Playing devil’s advocate, I reminded him of something. “He said she was being weird and he suspected she might’ve, but he also said she slapped him when he accused her of it.”
“That don’t mean shit,” Nico said, pulling me even tighter to him. “I actually hope she did. They may’ve worked out all their other issues in the past, but I know my brother. If she is being shady like that, even if it is just a dude she’s chatting or texting with but keeping it from him, that’s one thing he’s not gonna get past.”
“Really?” I turned to him. “So even if she’s just texting with another guy he’d deem that as shady?”
“Hell yeah,” he said, moving his hand to my ass and squeezing. “No one’s all jumpy and defensive when questioned about something the way he said she was unless they’re hiding something.” He squeezed my ass a little harder, making me yelp. “And don’t tell me his being pissed about it surprises you.” He nipped my neck before adding, “Because it shouldn’t, Madeline.”
“It doesn’t,” I said, turning all the way around and facing him with a big smile. “What surprises me is he’d end their relationship based on a suspicion. He has no proof. You wouldn’t dump me if you just suspected I was being shady but had no proof, would you?”
Nico lifted a brow, but I kissed it with a giggle because he had to know this was strictly hypothetical. “There’s a huge difference between us and them and you know this,” he said, running his fingers through my hair gently. “First of all, I’ve known from day one you were it for me. Nolan’s never been sure about Shana. It’s why he doesn’t seem the least bit broken up about this. Second, neither of us have time for any friends right now. So suddenly making time for friends of the opposite sex, especially ones we keep from each other, would have major repercussions.” He fisted his hand in my hair a little tight
er but not too tight then lifted that brow again. “Don’t you agree?”
I would’ve complained about his tugging my hair, but it actually turned me on. So I smiled instead, wrapping my arms around his near-naked body. “Oh I don’t know. I can be reasonable.”
“Ha!” he said then really laughed, but it turned into coughing, and he started sitting up.
When he was done coughing and then sneezing, I moaned right in time to do it with him. I giggled because it was perfectly timed, and his eyes widened in reaction. To my surprise, in the next second, he pinned me down on my back. Even not feeling a hundred percent and a little groggy from the meds, the voraciousness in those amazing eyes turned me on even more. “I’d fuck you just to teach you a lesson, but I don’t wanna get you sick.”
“I’ve already had the flu, remember?” I said, slipping my hand into his briefs and wrapping it around his full-blown erection. “And even if I hadn’t, I’d take my chances.”
I laughed at his eagerness when he pulled down my panties. Despite his acting like he was on his deathbed just minutes earlier, his need for this was as urgent as ever. He leaned in and kissed my neck. His beauty mark had since been replaced with a small tattoo of his name in a heart. Nolan did an excellent job with the coloring, so from afar, it actually did looked like a birthmark.
I wrapped my legs around his back with a groan as he slipped deep into me. “Fuck yeah,” I said unabashedly, spreading even wider for him.
“I’ll never get enough of this,” he said, sucking my neck this time as he slowly thrust deep in and out. “I’ll never get enough of you.”
Arching my back when he sucked my neck again, I moaned in delight and squeezed my eyes shut. Every time. Every single time we made love I couldn’t help but think about this and smile. All that time away from Nico, my heart, body, and soul never once stopped yearning for him. Even when my brain didn’t know he existed, my heart and soul did. He was absolutely right about us being different from Nolan and Shana. From the first moment I gazed deep into his eyes, I knew we were soul mates. We were one and I was certain of it now. If it’d taken me twenty or even fifty years to find my way back into his arms, I would’ve never stopped searching. “God, I love you,” I said breathlessly as he sped up.