All About the Hype

  ‘Oh.’ She turns away from me to rummage in her wardrobe.

  ‘Do you think that’s wrong?’ I ask with a furrowed brow.

  ‘Well, I wouldn’t like it if Brett was still friends with his exes. It just complicates things, doesn’t it?’

  ‘Maybe, but I don’t want to lose Tom from my life.’

  She turns round and gives me a significant look.

  ‘I still care about him,’ I say. ‘It doesn’t mean I want to be with him like that any more.’ Does it?

  ‘Are you sure you’re not just keeping him sweet so if things with Jack don’t work out—’

  ‘No!’ I exclaim. ‘Definitely not. Anyway, Tom never goes back. He was totally in love with his last girlfriend when she cheated on him, and she begged him to give her another chance, but he never once cracked. He stuck to his guns. Even if I wanted Tom back, he’d never go there.’

  ‘Hmm,’ she says.

  ‘Show me what you’ve got in mind,’ I prompt, nodding at her wardrobe. I think it might be a good idea to change the subject.

  I’m trying on my third outfit when there’s a knock at the door. Agnes opens it to reveal her brother standing there.

  ‘You gotta minute?’ he asks me, leaning against the door frame.

  ‘You can have her in five,’ Agnes replies inflexibly. ‘We’re in the middle of a styling session.’

  ‘I’ll come and knock for you,’ I tell him, smoothing my hands over the skin-tight skirt I’m wearing. It’s black with gold thread and fits tight to my hips, all the way down past my knees. I’m wearing a black, fitted bodice top.

  Jack’s eyes graze over the length of my body before meeting my eyes. Electricity crackles between us. Then he pulls the door shut without another word.

  ‘That’s the one,’ Agnes says, pursing her lips as she nods at my outfit.

  ‘Are you sure?’

  ‘Just take it off now before he tears it off you.’

  ‘Agnes!’ I squawk. ‘Not likely!’

  ‘It’s only a matter of time, though, right?’

  ‘Not if we can’t stop arguing,’ I reply truthfully. ‘And I can’t believe I’m having this conversation with my boyfriend’s sister,’ I mutter, as she giggles and passes me my jeans.

  As soon as I knock on Jack’s door, it opens.

  ‘I’m just going for a smoke,’ he says, joining me in the corridor and patting his jeans pocket. ‘Come with.’

  I follow him downstairs and outside to the garden.

  ‘Do your mum and stepdad mind you smoking?’ I ask. He’s pretty blatant about it.

  He shrugs. ‘They’d prefer that I didn’t.’ He sits on one of the sunloungers beside the pool. The floor is covered with peach-coloured tiles and there are enormous palms dotted around in huge terracotta pots.

  I take a seat opposite him and watch as he lights up, blowing smoke away from me.

  ‘I guess I should quit,’ he says, regarding the cigarette he’s holding. ‘But some habits are hard to kick.’

  ‘Does the same go for you being a player?’ I ask drily.

  ‘What do you want from me?’ he asks outright. ‘I’ve told you we’re exclusive. I’m not messing around.’

  ‘I’m not, either.’

  ‘So what’s the problem?’ he asks, flicking his ash into a nearby pot plant.

  ‘The problem is that you don’t trust me to be friends with Tom,’ I remind him.

  He sighs and looks away from me. ‘I trust you,’ he says eventually, meeting my eyes.

  ‘You do?’ I ask with surprise.

  ‘Yeah. I don’t have to like it, though, do I?’

  ‘No,’ I reply with a grin, getting up and going to sit beside him. He stubs out his cigarette and leans back on the sunlounger, patting my leg and indicating for me to straddle him. I breathe in sharply as he manoeuvres himself beneath me so he’s more comfortable. I wouldn’t like his mum to look out of the window and see us in this position, even though we’re fully clothed.

  ‘So your stepdad is coming on Saturday?’ Jack asks, eyeing me steadily.

  ‘Yep.’

  ‘You’re not gonna be around this weekend, then?’

  I shake my head. ‘Not really, no. Why?’

  He purses his lips. ‘You know Saturday’s Valentine’s Day.’

  ‘Is it?’ I reel backwards. I’d completely forgotten, which is odd considering how much they make of it here. The hearts and flowers have been in the shop windows for so long that they’ve almost become part of the furniture.

  ‘I wouldn’t have thought you’re the Valentine’s type,’ I say with a smirk.

  He shrugs. ‘I’m not, really.’

  ‘Well, you won’t miss me, then.’

  ‘Don’t be so sure about it.’

  We smile at each other for a long moment, and then I lean down and kiss him. He clasps my face in his hands and kisses me back passionately.

  I pull away on a gasp of breath. ‘Jack,’ I whisper, wanting more. I always want more. ‘I can still see you while Stu’s here. We’re going to be practising every day, anyway,’ I say hurriedly.

  He reaches up and tucks a wayward lock of hair behind my ear, looking thoughtful.

  ‘You sound a little stressed about everything. Do you need to do so much?’

  ‘I keep thinking it’s ridiculous that I’m taking my GCSEs on top of everything else,’ I grumble.

  ‘I’m talking about your singing lessons, your keyboard lessons. You can already sing, and keyboards will be cool, but they’re not gonna happen in time for this gig. Maybe you need to cut yourself some slack.’

  I bite my lip, thinking. ‘Maybe,’ I reply with a sigh. ‘Do you think Miles and Brandon are OK about doing practice at my house?’

  ‘They’re totally cool.’

  ‘What did they think of the interview?’ I ask apprehensively.

  He shifts beneath me so I sit up again, worried I’m squashing him.

  ‘It’s not really their thing,’ he says diplomatically.

  ‘I didn’t talk about the band as much as I wanted to,’ I tell him.

  ‘I think the name’s mentioned once,’ he states.

  ‘Is that all?’ I ask with alarm. ‘God, I definitely talked about you guys more than that.’

  ‘Don’t worry about it. It’s not what the piece was about.’

  ‘Yeah, but—’

  ‘Seriously, don’t worry,’ he reassures me. ‘The gig’s already sold out so you’re not gonna dampen anyone’s mood.’

  ‘Has it?’

  ‘Yeah, the Muso piece helped. Anything you can do to raise our profile won’t hurt, but it’s not a problem if you can’t.’

  ‘I wonder if Johnny can help. I mean, he’s so well connected. Surely it’s only a matter of time before someone wants to sign us.’

  Jack raises his eyebrows. ‘I hope so.’

  Chapter 17

  It is so good to see Stu again. I really wanted to go with Davey to collect him from the airport, but the boys came over to have an early band session so I could take the afternoon off. I’m grateful to them, but desperate to spend time with my stepdad.

  The LA traffic must’ve been exceptionally good for a change, because he arrives while we’re still in the swing of things.

  My dad brings him into the studio.

  ‘Stu!’ I yelp, cutting out mid-song. I shove my mic into its stand and rush out through the glass studio door to engulf him in a hug.

  He chuckles warmly, pulling away to look at my face.

  ‘You shouldn’t have stopped,’ Johnny drawls.

  ‘No, that wasn’t very professional of me.’ I cast a look over my shoulder at my bandmates watching and waiting patiently. ‘Coming, guys,’ I call, turning back to Stu. ‘You want to watch for a bit? We won’t be long.’

  ‘Sure,’ he says, pulling up a chair.

  ‘Mind if I sit in, too?’ Johnny asks.

  ‘Of course not.’ I try to sound flippant, but his presence always makes me nervous. I
notice my bandmates looking a little less comfortable when I walk back into the studio, too. ‘OK?’ I mouth.

  Jack gives me a small nod.

  Johnny leans forward in his seat, resting his elbows on his knees. It’s a laid-back position compared to Stu’s more upright posture, but I can tell that Johnny is anything but relaxed. He’s watching and listening intently as we start the song from the beginning. This is his thing. This is what he’s good at.

  Stu claps when we’re finished, but Johnny just nods. I think he’s impressed. ‘Sounding good,’ Johnny says. ‘A week today, right?’

  ‘Yeah, you coming?’ Brandon asks my dad cheekily.

  ‘Flying in especially,’ he replies.

  It’s so nice to have Johnny in here like this with us. He’s been pretty absent from the family in the last few weeks. The only time we’re guaranteed to all be together is at breakfast, but Meg really has to kick his butt to get him downstairs in time. He’s so tired rehearsing for his tour that he’d sleep in every day if he could. And, if he’s going to be home for dinner, we all make an effort to be there.

  Anyway, because of his busy schedule, Johnny is not going to bring Meg and the boys to San Francisco for the weekend. Instead, they’re going to stay here and he’s going to fly in just for the gig. He’s not even planning to stay overnight.

  Stu and I, on the other hand, are making a proper weekend of it. Johnny has organised for us to fly by helicopter on Friday, straight after school, returning on Sunday night. I can’t say I’m desperate to feel helicopter-sick again, but air travel has its benefits and we’ll be there in time for dinner with Tom.

  I haven’t mentioned this plan to Stu yet. Or Jack…

  We finish up soon afterwards. Miles played on Johnny’s drum kit so all he has with him are his sticks, but Jack has his pedalboard so he takes longer to pack it away in its padded case.

  ‘I’ll meet you by the car,’ he tells Brandon, who’s swung his bass guitar over his shoulder. We used Johnny’s amps, too.

  ‘It’s OK, I’ll wait for you,’ Brandon says cheerfully.

  ‘Have you guys heard the song Jessie’s doing on my new album?’ Johnny asks.

  ‘I still haven’t played it for them,’ I interject cautiously.

  ‘Let’s hear it!’ Brandon says, clapping his hands together.

  ‘Yeah, I’d love to hear it myself,’ Stu chips in.

  Butterflies invade my stomach as Johnny digs out the CD and presses Play. Jack shoots me an encouraging smile.

  Brandon reacts with enthusiasm. ‘Man, that is sick!’ he exclaims. ‘What’s it called?’

  ‘“Acorn”,’ Johnny and I reply simultaneously.

  Miles nods. ‘It sounds cool.’

  ‘Very cool,’ Jack says, smiling at me.

  Johnny ruffles my hair, proudly.

  ‘OK, you’re embarrassing me now,’ I say, blushing. ‘So are we meeting back here tomorrow evening?’

  We all walk downstairs together, but Jack manages to hang back from his bandmates. He arm-bumps me and whispers, ‘Back pocket,’ jerking his head to indicate he wants me to get something for him. He’s laden down with his guitar and pedalboard so I reach into his pocket and pull out a small white box.

  ‘For you,’ he mouths.

  ‘What is it?’ I whisper, taken aback.

  He frowns at me, so I shove it into my own back pocket, aware of Stu and Johnny talking between themselves as they follow right behind us.

  Jack jogs down the last of the steps. ‘See you tomorrow,’ he calls over his shoulder, striding after his bandmates.

  I come to a standstill at the bottom of the steps. He’ll be through the door before I reach him so I decide to let him see himself out.

  ‘Coffee?’ Johnny calls, heading into the kitchen.

  ‘Sure,’ Stu calls back, joining me. ‘I saw that,’ he says in a low, meaningful voice.

  ‘Saw what?’ I ask innocently.

  ‘What did he give you? Are you smoking again?’

  ‘What? No!’ I exclaim, annoyed. ‘I don’t know what he gave me,’ I say with a shrug.

  It’s obvious from Stu’s expression that he’s waiting to find out. Feeling nervous, I take a chance and pull out the box. It is about the same size as a cigarette packet, and wrapped in white paper, so I can see why Stu might’ve jumped to that conclusion. I carefully unstick the edges, wondering what the hell it is and whether I’m insane to open it in front of my stepdad, when I realise there’s a grey velvet box underneath the wrapping paper. I open it up, my heart in my throat, to see a tiny silver red rose. It’s a charm for my bracelet.

  My face breaks into the widest grin. ‘It’s for Valentine’s Day,’ I say, as my heart melts.

  ‘So you’re still together, then?’ Stu asks. He’s not enthralled by the idea, judging by his tone.

  ‘Yes, we are,’ I state adamantly.

  ‘What was with all the secrecy, then?’

  ‘Miles and Brandon don’t know we’re a couple. It would complicate things with the band.’

  I’m getting a bit sick of this explanation – no one understands what the band means to me, how much of my new life is tied up in it.

  ‘I hear Tom is going to be in San Francisco this week,’ Stu says, but, although his tone is casual, I notice his cheeks flush slightly.

  ‘We’re meeting him for dinner on Friday night,’ I reply.

  ‘Are we?’ He looks alarmed. ‘Are you two in contact?’

  ‘Yeah, we are.’

  I presume he reacted like that because, if Tom and I speak, then I’ll know he’s been seeing Tom’s mother. But now is probably not the right time to get into a conversation about whether they’re just friends. We head into the kitchen together.

  Over the next few days, I can’t seem to bring myself to ask Stu if he’s moved on from my mum – it hurts too much and I’m too scared of his answer.

  In the end, though, it’s him who instigates a talk with me.

  We’re sitting out on the terrace one night after dinner. Johnny managed to get back in time for a change and Meg has taken the boys inside to bed, so it’s just the three of us: my two dads and me.

  ‘Jess, there’s something we need to talk to you about,’ Stu starts.

  Both he and Johnny are sitting opposite, staring at me attentively. I have my back to the view and the city lights are casting a dim glow over their faces. It’s enough for me to be able to see their expressions, but the anguish in Stu’s voice is almost palpable, anyway.

  ‘What is it?’ I ask nervously, instantly on edge.

  ‘It’s the house,’ Stu says. ‘I’m selling it.’

  My heart clenches. ‘Why?’ I ask shakily.

  Johnny reaches across and presses my hand. ‘You know it’s not secure enough. You’ll be going home to visit. I need you safe, Jess.’

  ‘It’s not just that,’ Stu says reluctantly, and I watch as his Adam’s apple bobs up and down. ‘It’s hard for me to be there on my own. I need a fresh start.’

  ‘Does that go for Caroline, too?’ I ask of Tom’s mum.

  He looks startled.

  ‘Tom told me that you’ve been seeing her.’

  ‘We’re friends,’ he says warily.

  ‘Is that all?’ I ask. Johnny shifts in his seat, clearly feeling awkward on Stu’s behalf.

  ‘That’s all,’ Stu replies, swallowing again. ‘But—’

  ‘You want it to be more,’ I finish his sentence for him.

  ‘Jess…’ he starts.

  ‘It’s OK,’ I whisper, my eyes filling with tears. ‘I wish you’d find someone who wasn’t my ex’s mum, but it was going to be hard for me, whoever it was.’

  Johnny takes my hand.

  ‘Do we really have to sell?’ I ask with difficulty.

  Stu nods and Johnny squeezes my hand. ‘It’s for the best,’ Stu says.

  My nose starts to prickle as I think of my bedroom, my bed, my mum lying next to me and keeping me awake with her chatter when I really sh
ould have been going to sleep for school the next day. I think of our kitchen and Mum standing in front of the toaster, waiting for the toast to pop up. I remember lying on the sofa with her in the living room while she stroked my hair with her cold hands, and I gulp back a sob.

  Stu comes round to my side of the table and takes me in his arms, but my hand is still in Johnny’s and I squeeze his tightly, not wanting him to let me go.

  Thankfully, the very next day I get some news that cheers me up enormously. I’m at lunch, sitting next to Agnes, when Gina and Margarita join us.

  ‘Guess what?’ Gina says, as they both slide into chairs opposite.

  ‘What?’ I ask, my eyes darting between them.

  ‘We’re coming to San Francisco!’ Gina blurts, her red hair bouncing around her shoulders.

  ‘You are?’ I ask with amazement.

  ‘Not just us,’ Margarita says, waving excitedly across the room. I look over my shoulder in time to see Sienna rolling her eyes.

  ‘You already told her?’ she berates, as she approaches on her long, gazelle-like legs.

  ‘I didn’t know where you were,’ Gina replies defensively.

  ‘You’re coming, too?’ I ask Sienna with delight.

  ‘I sure am. And Rafe said he can probably make it, too. Justin and Jenna are maybes.’

  ‘Oh my God!’ I stare at them, open-mouthed.

  ‘Wow,’ Agnes says, not sounding anywhere near as delighted as I am.

  ‘We wanted to help,’ Margarita says, regarding me in earnest with her caramel-coloured eyes. ‘With a bunch of us there, we’ll be able to get some cool pics, help to increase All Hype’s profile a bit.’

  ‘Guys, seriously,’ I say, blown away. ‘I really appreciate this.’

  As we’re walking to our next class, Sienna pulls me aside. ‘I’ll catch you up,’ I say to Agnes.

  She puts her head down as she walks on.

  ‘Someone else wants to come to your gig,’ Sienna says, looking worried.

  ‘Who?’

  ‘Don’t freak out.’

  ‘Who?’ I ask again, doing exactly that.

  ‘My sister.’

  ‘What?’ The blood drains from my face. ‘No!’

  ‘Just hear me out! She’s gonna be in San Francisco for business and she loves checking out new bands—’