Toxic (Addiction #1)

  Rook pointed at himself. “I’m the one having trouble deciphering good music? Ok…I could eat alphabet soup and shit out better lyrics than them. We can find a much better band to go on tour with us and not just settle for a group who sounds worse than a fat man’s wet fart.”

  Rook didn’t believe a word he was saying, but hell if he wasn’t going to put up a fight. He didn’t need to get wrapped up in a woman, especially one that he already couldn’t stop thinking about.

  He could tell that he was pissing his bandmates off because they were all fuming in their seats, but Rook could give two shits. He needed to protect himself and if that meant lying out of his ass until the cows came home, he would.

  Grey stepped up and stopped Rook from any more insults. “Until you get your shit together, sober up, and can go a night without drowning yourself in alcohol, your opinion doesn’t weigh two stones in this group. You’re the reason why we’re in this situation, so frankly, you don’t have a fucking say in who gets to tour with us. Maybe once you wake up in the morning without looking like absolute crap, we’ll consider what you have to say.”

  Rook was speechless…for once in his life. He knew he relied on booze to get him through the night, but that was because all he wanted to do was pass out. If he didn’t pass out into oblivion every night, then that gave him a chance to think. A chance to think about the shit life he had. Yes, he was famous and everyone wanted to be in his shoes, where girls flocked to his sides and offered their pussies for his taking, but he didn’t want that kind of comfort. He had serious parental issues and if he was left to his own thoughts then he would start feeling like a twelve year old boy who couldn’t get his emotions in check. Alcohol and the occasional happy pill were the only things that helped him through his days.

  There was no use fighting his bandmates, though, because they had already made up their minds. They contacted the label and putting Twisted Perfection on tour with them was already in the works. There was absolutely nothing he could do.

  “Whatever. Clearly you don’t care about what I have to say about this…”

  “We would if your opinion wasn’t saturated with Jack Daniels,” Landon said.

  Rook looked to Cruz, his only ally when the Cross brothers started to gang up on him, but Cruz was silent. So much for being brothers from another mother.

  Tossing his mug in the sink and raking his hand through his hair, he looked at his bandmates, his three best friends, the guys that helped him through every shit thing that happened to him. They were cutting him a break, if he thought about it. They put up with a lot of his misgivings but Rook was always looking out for number one, no matter what. He learned the hard way that when he looked out for someone else, he got burned.

  He didn’t want the tour to put a wedge between him and his friends though, so he let it go and decided that he would just stick to himself, be the ass that he was and not interact with the opening act. He could easily do that…hopefully.

  Running his hands over his face, Rook said, “Alright, do what you want to do. Just keep them away from me.”

  His friends knew that was Rook’s version of conceding, so they all high fived and Grey was on the phone before Rook had a chance to even leave the kitchen. Rook needed a hot shower and his guitar, he needed to escape into another world, but he didn’t want his usual vices this time. He wanted his music.

  ***

  It had been one beyond crazy, extremely busy and very stressful week, but they finally made it. Maisy was sitting on a tour bus with Shattered Souls, driving to their first concert on the first leg of their tour. Maisy was unsure of the strings Grey had to pull in order to make it all happen, but whatever he did worked because they were finally doing it; they were finally going somewhere with their careers. They had their big break and Maisy couldn’t believe it was with Shattered Souls, a band they idolized and practically worshipped.

  They had to sing for the label multiple times during the week, which was very intimidating, but after the fourth showing, they got used to the pressure. Now, if only they could prepare themselves for the sold out arenas they would be playing in.

  The last week had been a whirlwind of excitement, stress, and lots of time spent in the bathroom thanks to the attack of the nervous shits.

  As she looked around, she still couldn’t believe she was in a tour bus, with the leading alternative rock band in the country. Shattered Souls were nice enough to share their tour bus with them until the label was able to get a separate bus for them. She knew the bus for Twisted Perfection wouldn’t be half as nice as what she was currently in, but she didn’t care, she was going to live it up.

  The guys had been so sweet and nice to them, it was kind of hard to imagine their luck. Grey handled all the dealings with the label, which was nice because they had no clue what they were doing. Landon gave them some comic relief while Cruz was constantly giving them advice for their first show. The only person who was not helpful…well, not even around, was Rook. She had yet to say hi to him since she signed up for the tour.

  She knew Rook was kind of an asshole, but she didn’t think he was going to ignore them completely. A little hi would have been nice, since they were sharing a bus and all, but how much could she really expect…he was too good for them and she knew it.

  Maisy found it fascinating to watch everyone on the bus and see what kept them busy. Landon and Cruz were playing some kind of video game with a controller that looked way too difficult to use. Willow and Kaid were going over the set list, something Maisy should have been paying attention to, but was too distracted, and Quinn and Grey were snuggled up on the couch, fingers laced together, talking quietly to each other.

  They were an adorable couple; it was hard for Maisy not to stare at them and get jealous that she had never had a relationship like theirs. Whenever Quinn was around, Grey had a huge smile on his face and you could see the love he had for her. Seeing Quinn and Grey together was endearing to Maisy, but Willow despised it. Maisy tried to tell her that her infatuation with Grey was just that, an infatuation. Quinn and Grey had been together since high school and nothing was going to change that. Willow had other ideas which Maisy tried to talk her out of since they didn’t need any problems. Their dreams were finally coming true, they didn’t need to mess them up with infatuation.

  Speaking of infatuation, Rook finally came out of his lair. He staggered out from the back with a strut that oozed sex. Maisy felt herself melt on the spot. God, he was gorgeous. He was wearing jeans that fit him perfectly, a t-shirt that was tight around his muscular chest and loose where his waist met his jeans. His hair was messy, but styled nonetheless, which made her heart race at a deathly speed.

  Fuck, he was sexy.

  He raked his hand through his hair as he sidled up next to the coffee maker and made himself a cup. He looked like he might be hung over, but then again he wasn’t a guy who showed much emotion. She knew that because she had watched almost every single interview he ever was in. She bordered stalker status when it came to Rook, which was why she kept reminding herself to keep at least a couple of shreds of self-respect whenever he was around.

  “Look who decided to grace us with his presence,” Landon said, making everyone turn and look at Rook.

  Rook smirked at Landon and said, “Sorry, babe. I didn’t know you were having withdrawals. Do you need me to take you to the back and make you feel whole again?” Rook started moving predatorily toward Landon, making Maisy’s heart skip a beat. She only wished Rook would walk toward her like that and take her to the back room.

  “Touch me and you’re dead,” Landon said while stiff-arming Rook.

  Cruz held out his arms while making kissing noises and said, “I’ll take some sugar. I always love a rough and brooding man in my embrace.”

  “Landon already tapped your sorry ass and to hell if I’m going to have his sloppy seconds. Find another man to hold you,” Rook said with a grin.

  Maisy felt herself sigh. She was Pathetic.
r />   She must have sighed out loud because Rook looked up and made eye contact with her. As if he had hit her with liquid nitrogen, Maisy’s whole body seized from his stare. His eyes were a brilliant blue that stripped her to her soul and spoke of years of hurt. He was perfect, disturbed, and barely functioning, which was why she was so drawn to him. She knew what he was feeling, she knew the broken feeling he portrayed because it was the same feeling she lived with every day.

  Under his gaze, she couldn’t move; she couldn’t even acknowledge him; she just sat there as the feeling of rigor mortis took over her body. He didn’t acknowledge her either, he just stared back. Time stood still as they communicated their first interaction through their eyes.

  “Wow, this is awkward,” Cruz said, interrupting the silence that fell about the bus. “You just going to stare at her all day or you actually going to say hi?”

  Rook turned to Cruz and flipped him off causing Cruz to laugh out loud as he started up another game with Landon. Rook walked toward Maisy and held out his hand.

  “Rook Tyler.”

  Maisy took his hand in hers and prayed to God the Almighty that she was not drooling. Rook was so strong, so handsome…so irresistible, she never wanted to let go, but thankfully she had one ounce of self-respect left in her body and released his hand as she introduced herself.

  “Maisy Madison. Nice to meet you.”

  Rook nodded, removed his hand from her grasp, and walked over to introduce himself to Willow and Kaid. Maisy couldn’t help but notice how amazing his butt looked in his jeans. She had it really bad for the guy, he could shit out a pineapple and Maisy would think it was gold.

  “Nice to meet you all,” Rook said, as he headed for the back of the bus.

  She wondered what he did in the back room all by himself. She wanted to know, but she knew she couldn’t go back there and find out for herself. She didn’t want to ask his bandmates either because she didn’t want the other guys in the band to see right through her. Her infatuation for Rook Tyler was beyond transparent and she didn’t want to make it any more obvious than it was.

  The fact that everyone was at the front of the bus, doing their own thing and Rook was in the back doing who knows what, was eating away at Maisy. She couldn’t help it; she had to go back there. Thankfully, the bathroom was in the back so she had a good excuse to try to sneak a peek of the brooding Rook Tyler.

  She got up from her seat as Kaid and Willow looked at her.

  “I have to go to the bathroom. Set list looks good you guys. Leave it like that.”

  Willow and Kaid looked at each other, then at the paper and agreed.

  Happy with her input, even though it was the only thing she said the whole time, she headed to the back of the bus.

  Once she passed Landon and Cruz playing their video game, the bus became quiet and almost serene. Maisy could understand the attraction of sitting in the back by yourself; it was a comforting place where one could think and not be bothered. She passed the bunks where everyone slept and got to the bathroom. Still no sign of Rook. She was about to open the bathroom door when she heard the familiar sound of a guitar and that voice, that hypnotizing voice that ate away at her gut every time she heard it.

  It was as if the music was drawing her in. She had never heard the song he was playing, but it was beautiful. It touched her heart and she couldn’t help but drift toward the melodic sound.

  She got to the back room where the door was barely cracked open. She peeked in and saw Rook sitting on the bed, with his guitar on his lap and head down, looking at music sheets.

  The simple act of him writing and making music hit Maisy to her core. If Maisy wasn’t already head over heels for the man, she fell at that moment. He was the epitome of the perfect man for her; she knew it in her soul.

  He was so entranced in his music, he had no clue she was staring at the way his hands moved over his guitar, the way his brow crinkled when he wrote a note or lyric down or the way his facial stubble made his features harsh but his eyes stand out.

  She was just about to turn away when he looked up at her. He was startled by her presence, or more like her snooping, but no matter his reaction, she couldn’t pull herself away from the door. He looked her up and down and then nodded for her to come in. No words, no hand motions, just a nod.

  She was done for.

  ***

  He could feel her the moment she stepped to the back of the bus; he just wasn’t sure if she was actually there. When he looked up and saw her, he was startled because he thought he might have conjured her up in his mind, like a dream, but she really was standing in front of him.

  When he went to get some coffee and saw her out of the corner of his eye he couldn’t deny himself from introducing himself. He tried to stay in the back of the bus for as long as possible, but it was as if her soul was calling him to the front. He just had to go see her, he needed to hear her voice, and he needed to feel her skin on his.

  The minute he made eye contact with her, he knew he had made the wrong decision. He should have stayed in the back. She was even more gorgeous up close. Her hair was softer looking than he thought and the color was so vibrantly blonde that it made her big brown eyes stand out against her alabaster skin. She was not like every other woman he had ever bedded, she was something special and at that moment, when they were staring at each other, he knew she could be the downfall of him. Forget the drugs, the alcohol, and the pain he felt every damn day; Maisy Madison was going to be his crutch.

  Why he nodded for her to come to him, he would never know, but when she stepped into the room, it was as if the room shrunk three sizes too small. She was small but the aura she brought with her was almost suffocating. She had an overwhelming presence around him that he was having a hell of a time shaking off.

  “What are you working on?” she asked, while shifting from side to side. She was nervous, it was almost endearing to watch. Most of the women who spent time around him were ripping his pants off by now. Not that he minded the tenacity of the women, but watching Maisy squirm in her shoes was slowly lowering the wall he was trying erect around her.

  “Some new stuff. Why are you back here?”

  “Bathroom.”

  He nodded. “That the only reason?”

  She shook her head no. “I wanted to see what you were doing back here.”

  “Why’s that?”

  She shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know. It just seems like everyone is having fun up front. I didn’t know why you wouldn’t want to be around everyone.”

  “What does it matter to you?”

  He knew he was being a bit of an ass, but he needed to keep her at a distance, even though, at the moment, all he wanted was her in his arms.

  “It doesn’t…I mean, well I guess I just wanted to make sure everything was okay.”

  “I’m a big boy, Maisy. I can take care of myself.”

  Shock registered across her face from his harsh tone. “I never said you couldn’t, I just…” she stumbled across her words which made him feel like a giant ass. “I just…” Tears started to form in her eyes. He willed himself to stay strong as she continued. “I know what it’s like to feel lonely and left out. I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

  Who the hell would make her feel lonely and left out? If he wasn’t such a dick and scared of actually letting himself open up to someone of the opposite sex, he would make sure she never felt lonely or left out. The moment he saw her, he knew she was something special and she deserved to be treated that way…just not by him.

  “I’m fine. I like being alone…” He trailed off at the end so she would get the hint. Apparently she didn’t because she didn’t move. “Meaning, you can leave now.”

  “Oh.” She stumbled back into the door. “I’m…I’m sorry for bothering you.”

  She quickly grabbed the door to leave and before she fully closed the door, she leaned back in and said, “For what it’s worth, that song you’re working on is beautiful.”
br />   Then she shut the door. Rook flopped backwards on the bed and stared up at the carpeted ceiling of the tour bus. God, why was this happening to him? Why now? He was finally getting his life back together for the most part, why did the freakishly big-eyed girl have to come into his life?

  His mom was nowhere to be found, which was nice because that meant he didn’t have to deal with her whoring ways and his dad hadn’t hit him up for cash in a month. Meaning, Rook didn’t have his dad pushing drugs on him and begging for cash. Whenever his dad was around, Rook fell into a dark hole that took him days of drug and alcohol abuse to get out of. It had gotten to the point that the band hired security to keep Rook’s dad away but his dad always found a way to get to Rook. Always.

  But now, he didn’t have to deal with the shit parents he was dealt, no, he had to deal with the blonde goddess floating around his tour bus, butting into his music-making time and tempting him to finally open himself up to another person.

  ***

  Willow waited for the most opportune time to approach Grey which luckily turned out to be when Quinn went to her bunk to take a nap. Watching Grey and Quinn interact with each other was gut-wrenching. Willow wanted to hate Quinn but she couldn’t. Quinn was sweet, warm, and welcoming. That was why Willow felt so bad about her plan to win Grey over.

  Before Willow knew Quinn, she could care less about trying to get Grey to notice her, but the minute Willow stepped on the bus, Quinn was so excited to have Willow around and made her feel right at home. She was almost too nice, but everyone acted like Quinn’s fussing was normal, so Willow thought Quinn must always be that accommodating. Damn her.

  But she was not going to worry about Quinn right now because her mind was on one thing and one thing only and he had blue eyes, shaggy hair and a smile that melted her panties into a puddle.