The Fallout

  Eddy set the cake on the counter, where Els immediately pulled off the cover and frowned at the penguin, obviously not happy with the workmanship. “Hmmph.” She stuck a candle, a large blue 1, in the center of the cake and went back to stacking buns.

  I walked up behind Gram and told her, “That pork smells wonderful.”

  She shook her head. “Roasting in the oven for a few hours is not the same as roasting in a pit for three days.”

  I hugged her. “It’ll be delicious.”

  She patted my arm. “Go help your sisters. They’re setting the table.”

  “Okay.” The dining room table was spread with a bright blue tablecloth covered with penguins. “I’m sensing a theme.”

  Lexie was bent over a pile of silverware. “What was your first clue?”

  I split up the bunch of balloons, tying some on to a few of the dining-room chairs, then I went back into the kitchen. Lucas and Cara had disappeared, and Gram was pulling apart her pork with two forks, which she set down on a towel when she saw me. “Can you fill a pitcher with ice water and take it in?” She wiped her hands on her apron.

  I found a pitcher and filled it, then carried it into the dining room.

  Everyone else was inside the dining room, clustered around one end of the table, except for Cara. She was stopping at each chair with a balloon, untying each and watching it float up to the fifteen-foot ceiling. Five already bounced around up there. “Hey!” I said. “Does no one see what she’s doing?”

  No one looked up from whatever they were doing. I set the pitcher on the table and picked Cara up. “If you let all the balloons go, you won’t have any to play with.” She scowled and wriggled her way out of my arms, back to the ground where she ran over to Mom.

  “What are you guys doing?” I asked.

  “Quinn is opening a present,” said Reese.

  “Aren’t you gonna wait for all of us?” I asked.

  Eddy said, “It’s from me. Just a little kid’s skateboard.”

  Just then Gram walked in with a platter of pulled Kalua pork on whole grain buns. Els followed her with coleslaw and a fruit salad, which she set on the table. She said, “We’re ready.”

  Dinner was nice, with no arguments or tension, and everyone just enjoying the food. When we had finished, Eddy and I went into the kitchen and lit the candle on the cake. Then we carried it into the dining room. Lexie turned off some of the lights, so it was dim, the light of the small candle glowing.

  I looked around at all of us. The little kids all had smiles and wide eyes. Actually, Reese and Lexie did, too. I couldn’t help but think of the lackluster birthdays we’d all had in the Compound. Everything to do with a celebration had been a task of making do with what we had.

  I glanced over at Mom, who had tears in her eyes as Quinn squealed at the cake.

  She had always tried so hard to make things special for us the past few years. I wondered if she was relieved to be out of that situation, and back in the world we’d all been used to. A world where anything we wanted was at our fingertips. A world where a birthday celebration meant a fancy cake and candles and presents.

  Reese helped Quinn blow out the candle, then Gram got dessert plates while Els started cutting the cake.

  Eddy, on the other hand, didn’t seem particularly thrilled. He was smiling and laughing at the little kids, but it was different. Maybe because he’d never done without, had to make do like the rest of us had. The little ones would forget. Soon, they’d never know anything but this world, a world where they could have anything.

  But Reese and Lexie would never forget what those years had been like. And neither would I.

  Els set a plate of cake in front of me. The layers were made of red velvet, and the filling was white. I took a bite. Cream cheese. I shut my eyes and nearly moaned. “Wow.” Then I took another bite, and another.

  I smiled as I watched the members of my family eat their cake. Except for Quinn, who wore more than he ate. Maybe we wouldn’t forget, but celebrations, especially ones that included cake like this, would certainly help.

  After we’d finished, Quinn opened the rest of his presents. Then I offered to give the cake-covered birthday boy a bath, after which I ended up reading stories to him and Cara and Lucas until they all fell asleep. They’d stayed up later than usual, after nine by the time the last one fell asleep, and the house was quiet.

  I was all sticky from Quinn, so I took a shower and watched some television. But I couldn’t stop thinking about the whole evening, how nice it had been to have everyone get along. It made me reevaluate things, realize that I needed to mend whatever rift there was between Lexie and Eddy. Maybe the way to do that was to let him know I hadn’t chosen her over him.

  So even though it was almost eleven, I went and knocked on his door, lightly in case he was asleep. He didn’t answer, but I really didn’t want to wait until morning, so I knocked again. Then I turned the knob and pushed the door open. “Eddy?”

  The small light was on by his bed, so the room was dim. His bed was made, perfectly empty. Figuring he was downstairs watching television, I turned to go. But then I noticed the small garbage can by the door, and what lay on top. I picked it up. The Mariners shirt he’d had on the day we went to the ball game. The one like mine.

  I dropped it back in the garbage and started to leave, when I heard voices. The yard light shone in the door that opened to the balcony, and the curtain moved with the breeze. I stepped toward the open door. One voice was Eddy’s, but I wasn’t sure about the other. I tiptoed over to the open door. No one was on the balcony, so I stepped out the door, crouching so I wouldn’t be seen.

  Through the bars on the balcony, I peered down at the pool area. Eddy’s head was just visible above the back of a chaise lounge. And someone sat next to him in another one. I couldn’t tell who it was. One of the guards maybe?

  Eddy said, “I’m glad they’re back, don’t get me wrong. Thinking they were all dead … that was the worst day ever.”

  The other person spoke: “This must be hard to get used to.”

  Tony? Tony was there, in our yard?

  I grabbed a hold of one of the metal bars and squeezed. How could Eddy have let him in?

  Eddy said, “Some days it all just seems so frickin’ weird. I’ve got my sisters back, only they’re different than they used to be. And the little kids. They’re cute and all, but, man. I feel like I’m the babysitter that they hate. I’m getting to know them, but it takes awhile. And Eli…”

  I froze and held my breath. My heart pounded as I waited for him to go on.

  “Sometimes he’s normal. We get along and do stuff. And then other times, he’s, like, my project. Like he’s this foreigner that I am forced to teach American ways.” He breathed out. “I find myself just feeling sorry for him. And some days, to be honest, all that pity feels like work.”

  I realized I was clutching the bar so hard I’d lost feeling in my hand. I let go and turned around to head back into Eddy’s room. I didn’t want to hear anymore. I didn’t need, or want, Eddy to feel sorry for me.

  But then Tony said, “So you up for it? Should we go?”

  Eddy said, “Yeah, let’s do it.”

  I turned back as they headed around the side of the house. I quickly ran out Eddy’s door and back to my own room, and over to the windows that looked out on the woods at the edge of the property. As I watched, they walked over to the wooded area, climbed over the fence, and disappeared.

  My heart was pounding. Should I tell someone?

  I sank down on the edge of my bed.

  Eddy had left with someone we knew nothing about. We didn’t know Tony’s last name or where he lived. Eddy could be in danger.

  I picked up the phone on the bedside table, and my finger hovered over the button that went directly to the guardhouse. I would call William, who worked the night shift, and tell him to go after Eddy.

  But then I set the phone back down.

  The reason I wanted William to
go after Eddy wasn’t to keep him safe. It was to get him back. To keep him away from Tony.

  The truth was I wasn’t worried about my brother; I was jealous that he’d rather be with someone other than me.

  While I was hard to be with, work as he put it, apparently Tony wasn’t. And if my own brother would rather be with someone he’d just met, then …

  … that was one more thing in my life that was messed up.

  Eddy not only told a stranger who we were, he brought that stranger to our house. And then he snuck out.

  My hands clenched into fists.

  After all his lecturing to Lexie about not making Mom upset, here he was, doing something that would send Mom over the edge.

  My heart pounded. Two could play at that game.

  I went over to my desk and picked up my cell phone. I hit #5 on my speed dial.

  “EJ?” Verity sounded sleepy.

  “Yeah,” I said. “Sorry to wake you, but I wanted to ask … can you meet me sometime next week?” I swallowed, and then gathered up the nerve to add, “There’s something I need to tell you.”

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  Verity and I talked, and made plans to meet the next week. I would’ve liked to choose somewhere nice, where we could get coffee or dessert, maybe go for a walk; something to make it seem like a real date.

  But it would be too hard to get out of the house.

  Going back to the Progeria Institute was probably the only place I could talk my mom into letting me go on my own. Even then, I’d probably have to come up with a pretty decent lie.

  But when I woke up the morning after we talked, I regretted calling Verity.

  I lay there, looking up at the ceiling.

  Eddy may have been ready to tell someone who we were, but I wasn’t ready to trust anyone like that. No way. And after sleeping on what I’d heard Eddy say about me, I woke up feeling more reasonable about it.

  His wanting to hang out with Tony actually made sense.

  All I did was worry about things: my sisters, my mom, the little ones. I’d even told Eddy about some of my stranger, more paranoid worries, like the doomsday prepper people following us.

  And Phil. Eddy was probably tired of my saying bad things about Phil and our dad.

  When it came down to it, I was like an old lady with my constant worrying; being ultra-cautious about everything. Someone like that is no fun to be with.

  Not only that, I didn’t even have the confidence to choose my own clothes, instead I copied whatever he had.

  With a house full of children, Eddy was already reminded every day of how his life had changed. It wasn’t fair for me to expect him to sit around waiting for me to catch up to him. Be his equal again. Be normal.

  Furthermore, why would he want to?

  I got up, changed into running gear, and started on the treadmill.

  Maybe Eddy felt like I did, that it was never going to happen.

  So, of course, Eddy would see Tony as a better choice than me.

  But being reasonable about it didn’t make me any less envious. Or curious.

  As I ran, I looked out the window at the section of fence they’d climbed over, and the woods where they had disappeared.

  Where did they go?

  Did they meet up with anyone? Girls maybe?

  And how long had they been sneaking out? Maybe Tony had been coming over before then, maybe this hadn’t been the first time.

  I pushed the button to increase the speed.

  The part that made me feel the worst was that Eddy hadn’t told me about Tony. He hadn’t told me about where they went or what they did.

  That part felt like betrayal. Because he was leaving me out.

  I finished my run and then went down and poured a bowl of cereal. Sunshine poured in the windows, so I took my breakfast outside. Cocoa ran over to me, wagging her tail.

  “Hold on, let me finish.”

  A FedEx truck pulled up to the front. Joe went out the small door in the gate and came back with a package, which he took into the guardhouse with him.

  I finished my cereal and set the bowl on the ground so Cocoa could drink up the leftover milk. Then I walked over to the guardhouse.

  Joe was standing there talking to Sam. They both greeted me, and I said, “I can take the package in.”

  Joe glanced at Sam.

  “What?” I asked. I was close enough to see the mailing label with Terese’s first name on it, along with Gram’s grandmother’s maiden name, like we used for all the online shopping. I frowned. Usually Gram’s first name was on all the packages, just as an extra precaution.

  Sam said, “We kind of have special instructions.”

  I frowned. “From who?”

  Joe pointed at the label. “Your sister. We’re supposed to call her when she gets a package from there, and then she comes and gets it.”

  I glanced at the label again, searching for the return address.

  SUGARWORLD, LLC

  What the hell?

  I picked up the package. “I’ll take it to her.”

  Joe started to protest, but I added, “I promise, I’ll tell her you two told me not to.” The package wasn’t that heavy, a few pounds maybe, and made a shuffling sound when I shook it.

  I grabbed my cereal bowl and went into the house.

  Even though it was after nine, no one but Gram and Els were in the kitchen, so I set my bowl in the sink and took the box upstairs. I knocked on Reese’s door.

  She groaned. “I’m sleeping!”

  I opened the door and walked in.

  She was facedown under the covers, her head covered with a pillow, one dark braid spilling over the side of the bed. Clementine was lying on Reese’s back, purring. “Go away.” Her voice was muffled.

  I set the package on her computer desk. “You’ve got mail.”

  Her head shot up, eyes wide. Then they narrowed as she saw the box. Reese shoved the covers aside and the cat went flying with a hiss as my sister leaped out of bed, grabbing for the box just as I snatched it up, holding it over my head.

  “Give it to me!” Reese jumped up, flailing with her arms as she tried to grab the box away.

  I straightened my arms, keeping the package well out of her reach as she got more and more irritated. Her chin crumpled and she started to cry.

  When she saw that getting the box was hopeless, she threw a fist into my stomach.

  “Oof.” I doubled over and clutched my stomach, dropping the box.

  She grabbed it and ran over to her bed, climbing back in.

  When I finally got my breath back, I went and sat on the edge of her bed. “That wasn’t nice,” I said.

  “You shouldn’t have taken my package.”

  “What’s in it?” I asked, deciding a calm and even voice would be the best way to find out what she was hiding.

  She sniffled. “You’ll tell Mom.”

  “I promise I won’t. You know it’s only a matter of time before she finds out anyway. It’s pretty hard to keep a secret around here.”

  Reese shook her head. “You keep secrets.”

  “No, I—”

  “Yes, you do! You and Lexie and Eddy all have secrets.” She wiped her eyes. “I just—”

  “You what?” I asked.

  “Nothing,” she said.

  “Reese, just show me what’s in the box. I won’t tell anyone. Then we can have a secret together.”

  She didn’t look completely sold on the idea, but she went over to the desk and got a pair of scissors and cut into the tape. When she unfolded the top of the box, I saw a familiar brown label.

  “M&M’s?”

  Reese turned the box upside down, dumping out several one-pound bags of the candy. She tossed the box beside them. “There.”

  I laughed, but then quickly stopped when I saw the serious look on her face. “Why M&M’s?”

  Her eyes filled with tears once more, and I put a hand out to her. She came and put her arms around my neck and cried, snuffling into my
shoulder.

  After a little bit, when she seemed like she was calming down, I asked, “Reese? What is it?”

  She shuddered and then stepped back. She picked up a bag of M&M’s. “Remember in the Compound?”

  I nodded. We’d all had a supply of our own favorite treat. “Those were your treat.”

  “I ran out.”

  I smiled. “We all kind of ran out.” I remembered my own stash of Snickers, and how, after the years went by, each one I unwrapped looked worse and worse, until I finally stopped unwrapping them and simply kept them under my bed. Maybe it made me feel better to know I still had a small piece of the old world there. An inedible piece, but still.

  “No,” said Reese. “I ran out two years after we went down there.”

  “How?”

  “I was sad. And they made me feel better. Remember my store?”

  I nodded. For a while in the Compound, before the little ones came along, the yellow room had been Reese’s playroom. She had a cash register and shelves and play money. I’d only seen it once, when I’d been on one of Dad’s early tours of the Compound. I wouldn’t know for certain, because I isolated myself very early on, but I could guess she spent a lot of time playing there.

  “I put the candy on the shelves. And sometimes Dad would come and give me real money for them. And it made me feel … normal. Like we were outside and I was just playing. A normal kid. So then I made Mom and Lexie come to my store, too. But I never … I never thought I might run out.” She looked at me.

  I knew what she was thinking. Why would anything run out when we’d always had everything we wanted?

  She swallowed. “So I kept selling them, making Mom and Dad and Lexie play in my store, and I kept eating them, too, and … then one day they were gone.”