Forever Changed

  “Come on,” he said, linking his fingers with mine. “I go on in ten minutes,” he added, dragging me toward the garage that was easily two stories high and looked like it could have housed a dozen vehicles at once.

  “Wow, when you said you played in Drake’s garage, I was expecting a typical two-car garage,” I said as he placed his hand on the small of my back and guided me through the opening where the big doors had been slid to the side.

  “Yeah, it’s cool his dad lets us jam here. Plus, there’s plenty of parking,” he said.

  The interior of the building took me as much by surprise as the exterior. I had expected dark stinky quarters with cobwebs everywhere, but instead, the building was as bright as a grocery store and looked equally as clean. Even the dim corners where the lights didn’t quite reach looked as well kept as the rest of the space. The concrete beneath our feet looked like a broom had recently swept over it. Glancing around, I spotted a makeshift stage that was easily more than twenty feet long and ten feet wide. Several electric guitars stood on stands behind a large gleaming drum set. Wires crisscrossed along the stage, leading to the multiple instruments. A couple of guys I recognized from school were warming up on their instruments. Clumps of people stood in front of the stage chatting while they waited for the band to start.

  “I need to get up there,” Maddon said, grasping my fingers momentarily in his hand. “Will you be okay?” he asked.

  “Sure, I’ll be standing off to the side like a groupie, but just don’t expect me to throw my panties up on stage,” I teased.

  “Well nuts, that’s the only reason I invited you along,” he joked, tugging lightly on a lock of hair before loping off toward the stage.

  I watched him pull his drumsticks out of his back pocket before settling down on the small black padded stool behind the drums that dominated the stage. He looked my way and grinned before focusing on adjusting the cymbals and drums to better suit his purposes.

  Surprisingly, the size of the crowd grew and their excitement along with it. I could feel it pulsating around me as I stepped back against the far wall so that the more eager groupies could swamp the area in front of the stage. Leaning back against the wall, I studied the crowd and found that most of them were students I had shared classes with over the years. They were joking around and talking, animated in their actions and obviously excited to be together. I couldn’t help comparing them with my smaller group I used to hang out with. Though we had spent a lot of time together, we never seemed to share the closeness that this group shared in their common love of the group on the stage.

  Someone by the door turned off the overhead lights so that the only light sources were the large halogen lamps on either side of the stage. The lighting illuminated the band members, making them the focal point. Drake stepped up to the microphone with an electric guitar in hand.

  “All right, guys, we’re Forever Changed, and we all thank you for coming out for another Thursday jam session. We appreciate your donations at the door and hope you enjoy the show,” he said, flashing a smile that gathered more than a few squeals from the crowd.

  “I’ll enjoy it more if you take your shirt off,” a girl from my Algebra II class yelled.

  Loud cheering followed her request. “Take your shirt off, take your shirt off,” the girls in the crowd chanted, making Drake laugh.

  “Well, darling, you know I’m not that easy. You’re going to have to show your appreciation for the music before you get treated to a show,” he said, grinning wolfishly.

  His comment raised several catcalls as the girls in the crowd made a show of fanning themselves.

  I couldn’t help the grin that slid across my face. They looked like naturals up there.

  I moved my eyes to Maddon and saw that he was looking directly at me as the group launched into their first song. I wasn’t sure what to expect when he had asked me to come hear him play, maybe a couple guys screwing around, playing songs that dominated the airwaves on most pop stations. Their music had more of a rock edge than I normally listened to, but something about it drew me in. Drake’s voice poured out through the microphone like warm honey, seducing every female in the vicinity.

  Though I joined in with the crowd to whoop it up for Drake, it was Maddon behind the drums that had me enthralled as he pounded out the beat of the music effortlessly. Every so often during the chorus of the song, he would croon out the lyrics in the sexiest voice I had ever heard. Even with sweat beading up on his forehead, I had to admit, he looked hot up there. I had spent my life surrounded by sweaty individuals with my active involvement in sports, but it never looked this good on anyone.

  I fought the urge to move closer to the stage so I could see him more clearly without the crowd obstructing my view. I just felt more comfortable back in the shadows.

  After four songs, they took a break and Maddon hopped off the stage and headed toward me.

  “So, what did you think?” he asked, taking a swig of water with sweat glistening on his forehead.

  I reached up to wipe his head, but stopped myself at the last moment. His eyes darkened as he saw my attempt. He reached down and grabbed my hand. Without saying a word, he moved it up to his hair that I had been dying to touch. I ran my fingers through the damp locks, focusing on his eyes as he shifted his body, bringing us as close as possible without actually touching. I flicked my tongue out and nervously licked my lips a moment before he dropped his lips on mine. I sighed lightly as his warm supple lips claimed ownership. The air around us seemed to sizzle with desire, and he kissed me like I was a delicacy that he wanted to savor. His gentle touch was my undoing as I tightened my hold on his head, dragging him closer to me, wanting more.

  He pulled back after a moment. I opened my eyes to find him studying me intently. Self-consciously, I loosened my hold on the back of his head.

  “Don’t,” he said a bit raggedly.

  “Don’t what?” I asked confused.

  “Don’t let go of me,” he said, dropping his lips back onto mine.

  The second kiss was as different as night and day as he devoured my mouth, taking everything I had to offer. I pulled him closer, wanting more, but not sure how to express it.

  After a moment, he pulled back as a magnified voice broke through my kiss-induced daze.

  “We'll begin the next set as soon as Maddon can untangle himself from the hot blonde in the back,” Drake teased.

  “I have to get back to work,” he said, looking at me like it was the last thing he wanted to do.

  “I’ll be waiting here,” I said, sagging against the wall for support since my limbs had decided to turn to Jell-O.

  “That’s what I’m counting on, sweets,” he said, dropping one last quick kiss on my lips before heading back up to the stage.

  The absence of his warmth left me missing something I never knew I wanted. I had always thought the loss of passion between Colton and me was my fault, like I was frigid or something, but the heat I felt for Maddon erased all those doubts.

  The band's second set was better than the first, and finally, the band members gave the girls in the crowd what they wanted, stripping off their shirts during a high intensity song. I felt my jaw drop as I got a look at Maddon’s tanned glistening chest under the bright lights of the stage. Unlike the beefy bodies of the football players I was used to hanging out with, Maddon’s lean muscle and defined abs rivaled any Hollywood heartthrob.

  “You’re nothing special,” a voice said beside me, breaking into my gawking session.

  “What?” I asked, confused to see a girl whose name I couldn’t remember leaning against the wall next to me.

  “I said, you’re nothing special. Maddon makes it a habit to hook up with girls at these jam sessions.”

  “Oh?” I asked.

  “Yeah, I just wanted to give you the heads-up that you’re not the first, and you won’t be the last.”

  “What makes you so sure that’s not want I’m looking for,” I said, flashing a bright
smile before sauntering closer to the stage. I could hear her sputtering her outrage behind me, but paid it no mind as I neared my destination.

  Maddon watched me with concern as he cut his eyes back to the girl who had been talking to me. I smiled, trying to reassure him. I had put up with snarky attitudes half my life and this girl had no game.

  The session ended a few minutes later after a solo from Maddon that made me wonder why I had never realized how hot it was to watch someone play the drums, or maybe it just had to be the right someone.

  “Hey,” Maddon said, pulling his t-shirt on over his head.

  “Hey yourself,” I said, stealing his line from before as I tried to control my breathing from his sudden closeness.

  “What did Miranda say to you?” he asked, sounding serious.

  “It’s not important,” I said as we left the building.

  “It is important,” he said, lightly grabbing my wrist to stop me.

  “Why?” I asked.

  “Because I don’t want you to be scared off.”

  “What makes you think she could say anything that would scare me off?” I asked.

  “What did she say?” he asked miserably.

  “She said I’m just a part of a long list of your conquests, and there’s nothing special about me.”

  “She’s wrong.”

  “About which part?” I asked, intrigued he even cared that much.

  “Both,” he said earnestly. “Okay, look, I’ve had my share of girls,” he said, running his hand through his hair in frustration. “But what I feel for you isn’t even in the same hemisphere,” he added, sinking down on one of the huge boulders that boarded the garage.

  “You don’t even know me,” I said, confused over his intensity.

  “You keep saying that, but I do know you. I know that at one time your friends were your whole world, but now your family is. I know that you used to hide your real beauty behind teased up hair and cosmetics you didn’t need. I know that you don’t put up with shit from anyone, including friends that are as shallow as a wading pool, or asshole teachers,” he finished, shooting me a small smile as he stood up to join me.

  “We don’t belong together,” I said, trying to find a reason to believe my words.

  “Says who?” he asked, bringing his hands up to cup the sides of my head.

  “Me, everyone,” I said, grasping at straws as he lowered his mouth to mine.

  “It’s just you and me, babe,” he said, pulling back slightly. “Everyone else can deal with it or take a flying leap off a cliff.

  I couldn’t believe that I was holding her in my arms and that she was responding to my kisses. I thought the night was doomed before it could really begin when I saw Miranda approach her during the session, but even that had worked out.

  “So, what did you wind up telling Miranda?” I asked as we sat atop one of the picnic tables Drake’s parents had scattered across the property. We were the only two who remained. Even Drake, after being officially introduced to the “hot blonde,” had feigned being tired and headed toward his house several acres away from where we sat.

  I could see her flush slightly in the dim light. “I told her 'how did she know that I wasn’t using you,'" she answered, laughing self-consciously.

  I chuckled. “I bet that went over well.”

  “I think she’s still choking on the air she gasped in,” she said giggling.

  “I’m glad you came tonight,” I said, dragging her closer to me.

  “Me too, but I have to go,” she said, pulling out her cell phone to check the time.

  “I know,” I said disappointed. “Can I see you tomorrow?”

  She hesitated for a moment. I held my breath waiting for her response. I knew she had a whole inner-turmoil thing going on over us seeing each other, and I was afraid the opposing side would win. “Sure,” she finally answered after a moment. I released my breath with a whoosh, making her hair stir up in my face. The smell of her shampoo enticed my senses, making me want to drag her off with me, caveman-style.

  “How about a movie?” I asked, trying to distract myself from what I was really thinking. Right about now, I was thankful that I wore baggy jeans.

  She shook her head. “I don’t want to run into anyone I know,” she answered.

  “Oh, right, I get it,” I said, trying to hide my disappointment.

  She turned in my arms so she could face me. “It’s not you. I just don’t feel like dealing with everyone’s crap and their opinions,” she said, reading my thoughts.

  “Okay then. If you could do anything, what would it be?”

  “I’d go to a park,” she said. “It’s been years since I’ve gone to one. I’d take Megan, but that was kind of her thing with my dad.”

  “Done,” I said, blowing on her hair so it would tickle my chin and senses again.

  “Oh, sorry, is my hair in your way,” she said, sweeping her hair together in one hand and pulling it off her neck.

  I was going to stop her until I spotted the creamy skin of her slender neck. It was all I could do to hold myself back from leaning down to see if it tasted as good as it looked.

  “What time should I pick you up?” I asked, trying to play it cool.

  “Um, how about I meet you?” she said, fidgeting slightly in my arms.

  I had to hide my frustration. I knew it was selfish, but I wanted her on my terms, not everyone else’s, which was pretty ballsy of me since a few hours ago I didn’t think I stood a chance with her.

  “Which park?” I asked.

  “How about Freemont?” she asked, sounding relieved that I didn’t pitch a fit.

  “What time?”

  “Anytime after school sounds fine with me,” she said, shooting me a smile as she stood up and dusted off her butt.

  “How about four, is that cool?

  “That sounds good. I’ll need to run it by my mom to make sure she doesn’t need me,” she said, twirling one of the long blonde locks that caressed her shoulder.

  I took one last whiff before we headed to our cars. I hated to let her go, and only the knowledge that I would be with her again in less than twenty four hours kept me from hauling her back in my arms. I wasn't used to feeling this way, but Kassandra wasn’t just some other girl, and I wasn’t going to blow it.

  With that resolve in mind, I kept the kiss I gave her short and sweet.

  “I’ll see you tomorrow,” I said, shutting her door for her. I watched her pull away, making sure she was well out of site before celebrating how well the night had gone. "Yes!" I yelled, knowing no one was close enough to hear me. I climbed in my car, still able to taste her lips on mine, and the image of her closed eyes, just before giving herself to me, burned in my memory.

  Mom was waiting up for me when I let myself in the front door. “How was your night?” she asked, placing her book on the granite topped coffee table in front of her.

  “It was fun.”

  “It must have been. I can’t remember the last time you looked so happy.”

  “The band was really cool,” I said, edging for the stairs before she could delve too far.

  “Did you go with Lacey and Colton?”

  “No, Colton had to work,” I said, trying to sidestep the question.

  “Really? I can’t picture Tom letting him work when he already has so much on his plate.”

  “From what I gathered, it was pretty much his dad’s idea,” I said, sinking onto the arm of the plush leather couch.

  “Hmmm, wonder what’s going on there?”

  I shrugged my shoulders, trying to act blasé.

  “You know something?” she demanded, seeing through my ploy.

  “Um, yeah, but I promised Colton I wouldn’t tell anyone,” I said, fiddling with my Pandora bracelet.

  “Fair enough,” she said, not pushing further. “By the way, what’s the deal with you and Lacey?” she asked, switching gears.

  I weighed my words carefully before answering so I wouldn’t upset he
r. “I guess I finally saw what dad was always harping on.”

  She nodded her head, comprehending what I meant. “What about your other friends? Are they treating you differently on the squad?”

  “I kind of quit cheerleading,” I said, not looking up.

  “What?” she asked. By the look on her face, I couldn't tell if she was mad or not.

  “I had to. It’s not like you were pulling your weight around here. Someone had to be here for Megan,” I said harshly.

  That was below the belt, I could tell. It wasn’t my intention to hurt her. I just didn’t want to have to defend my actions.

  “You’re right,” she said with glistening eyes. “Somehow in this whole mess, I’ve lost you both,” she said as a tear escaped and trailed down her cheek.

  “Mom, you haven’t lost us,” I said, getting up from my perch on the arm of the couch so I could sit next to her.

  “Yes, I have. Megan's still practically catatonic, and you’ve given up everything you loved so you could fill my shoes,” she said, choking on a half-sob. “I hope that man and his family suffer as much as we’ve suffered,” she said, sounding more vindictive than I had ever heard her. My heart dropped like it was filled with lead. I doubt she would consider my date with Maddon much of a hardship for him.

  “Mom, I don’t know why Megan still won’t talk, but she’s not catatonic. She just doesn’t want to talk right now, and I didn’t give up everything I loved. You and Megan top that list. I just sorted out my priorities, like dad always wanted,” I said, trying not to dwell on the impact her words just had on me.

  “I love you, honey," she said, dragging me in for a tight hug. "I’m sorry it’s been so rough the last few months,” she said, pulling back slightly.

  "We're fine Mom," I nodded, although I was freaking out over the corner I had painted myself into.

  “We’re going to make it,” she said, pulling me in for one last squeeze.

  A few hours ago I would have believed her, but her outburst about Maddon and his father made me doubt that anything would work out.“Yeah, we’re going to make it,” I said, hiding my doubts as I pulled out of her embrace. “I better hit the sack since I have classes tomorrow—and detention,” I said, grimacing at the thought of enduring confinement without Maddon.