Love Me Like This

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  There was no time for a nap when they returned to the B&B. After thanking Angie for stepping in at the last second for breakfast, Taylor found that her cleaning staff had an emergency elsewhere and couldn't come. Justin insisted on helping to scrub bathrooms and change sheets and vacuum, but when his sister called to let him know that they actually did need his help setting up for the rehearsal dinner that night, Taylor insisted that he go.

  It was hard to believe that the wedding was tomorrow, she thought as she took a breather on the foot of the king bed in one of the upstairs suites. Where had the week gone?

  The mattress and duvet that she'd picked out for this room were so soft and cozy that she was tempted to curl up and take a little nap. But not only would the rooms not clean themselves, she also had treats to bake for afternoon tea and a mountain of paperwork to get through before Justin came back to collect her for the rehearsal dinner.

  Thankfully, all she needed to perk up her flagging energy was to look down at the beautiful engagement ring sparkling on her finger. She finished cleaning and then moved on to baking, and every time the sunlight caught in the petal-shaped diamonds, she was surprised and delighted all over again.

  Justin would be telling his family this afternoon--and she hoped they'd be happy that she would soon be joining their family. The only one she was worried about, to be honest, was his father.

  She couldn't imagine Michael Morrison would be happy to hear that one of his sons was marrying a woman with kidney disease. Not after the family had already been through so much with Lisa's illness and death.

  Taylor had been planning to call her parents immediately after the hot air balloon ride, but when her mom texted to say that they were heading down to Saratoga Springs for the weekend to a little B&B they'd been to for their honeymoon, she decided her call could wait. She couldn't remember her parents ever doing anything for themselves--everything had always been about Taylor and her brother. Their talk yesterday had helped Taylor feel better about things. Maybe it had helped her mother too--enough that she was off to have a romantic weekend with her husband for the first time in nearly thirty years.

  Before she knew it, the afternoon had wound down, Taylor had given all of her guests restaurant recommendations, and it was time for her to get ready for Drew and Ashley's rehearsal dinner. She longed for a bath, but she'd likely fall asleep in the warm water. Thankfully, after forcing herself into a briskly cool shower, she felt much more bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.

  Justin walked into the cottage just as she was putting the finishing touches on her makeup at the antique table in her bedroom.

  "I keep thinking I'm going to get used to how beautiful you are." She was wearing pink silk tonight, her dress cut in a figure-hugging style that flattered her curves while not giving away any intimate secrets. "But it's never going to happen."

  "I feel exactly the same way." He was beyond gorgeous in a dark suit. So gorgeous that she was sorely tempted to peel the fabric off his broad shoulders. "How did I ever get so lucky?"

  He moved behind her in the mirror, and as she looked at the two of them together, she felt like a princess who had miraculously found her prince.

  "Something tells me you're going to get even luckier after dinner tonight," he told her in a husky voice as he held out his hand to help her up.

  She slipped on her heels, grabbed her purse, and then they headed out through her garden to the car. "What did everyone say when you told them we were engaged?"

  "They're thrilled."

  "Even your father?"

  He looked at her like she was nuts for even asking. "He wasn't there this afternoon, but I know he'll be overjoyed by the news when we tell him tonight. And honestly," he continued, "none of them seemed particularly surprised. In fact, I'd say there was plenty of credit-taking going on, given that they all conspired to book my week here."

  "I hope Ashley and Drew don't feel as though we're trying to overshadow their special day." Maybe it was lack of sleep that had her worrying about everything so much right now.

  "If you ask me, they were the happiest of all. Two giddy people in love always think everyone else should be in love too. And to be honest, I get that now." He shot her a devious look. "Wouldn't it be great if we could figure out how to get Grant to fall for someone? Especially if it's the last woman he ever thought he would fall for."

  "It sure would," she agreed. "But what about Olivia and Maddie? Don't you want to see them fall in love too?"

  His mouth flattened into a stubborn line that she couldn't help but find cute. "No one will ever be good enough for them."

  "You're going to have to stop protecting them at some point, you know."

  "Nope," he said, pretending to put his fingers in his ears. "Not listening."

  Clearly, this was an argument for another day. Good thing his sisters had her and Ashley and Serena on their side. Otherwise, who knew what shenanigans the Morrison brothers would pull to keep them forever locked up in chastity belts? Taylor knew firsthand how overrated safe was.

  The venue Ashley and Drew had chosen for their rehearsal dinner was extraordinary. Rather than booking a private room in the back of a restaurant, they had found a wine cellar that had been carved into the mountain, with large windows on one end that looked over a pond that reflected the rising moon.

  And yet, even though the beauty of her surroundings was undeniable, Taylor still couldn't settle her nerves. Not even when Justin's brothers and sisters embraced her with open arms as soon as they stepped into the cellar.

  "Congratulations!" Maddie cried.

  "We always knew you two would end up together one day," Olivia stated with a huge smile on her face.

  "I'm so happy that I'm going to have another great sister-in-law soon," Sean said as he bear-hugged her.

  "And can I just say how happy I am to know that there's another woman out there I can call when my own Morrison twin is making my head spin?" Serena said with an affectionate eyeroll in Sean's direction.

  "You know you love the way I make your head spin," Sean said, giving her a kiss clearly intended to make his point.

  Drew and Ashley hugged her as a pair. "We're so happy for you."

  "You're both so sweet," Taylor said, "but I feel bad about coming in with our news when this weekend is supposed to be all about you two."

  "Are you kidding? Your engagement has made our wedding weekend even more epic!" Taylor was relieved to see that Drew genuinely meant it. "And now that we've got the love vibes really cooking," he said as Grant walked over, "I'm thinking it's time to set our sights on some of the bigger holdouts in the family. Cupid's arrow is unavoidable, you know."

  Grant seemed not to hear--clearly, he had a great deal of practice in not letting himself be wound up by his siblings. He leaned over to give Taylor a kiss on the cheek. "It's great to see you, Taylor. Justin gave us the good news earlier. Congratulations. We're all very happy for you both."

  She believed he meant it, but she could also see a hint of reserve in his eyes. "Would you mind if we talked privately for a moment?" she asked.

  "Sure." Ever the gentleman, he asked if she would be too cold talking outside. When she said she would be just fine, he led her into a private corner of the garden.

  "I know you must have some questions about how quickly Justin and I got engaged," she made herself say despite her nerves.

  "Not at all," Grant replied before she could say anything more. "You've been a part of our family for nearly a decade. The truth is that we've always hoped you and Justin would become more than friends."

  "That's a lovely thing for you to say." The Morrisons were all protective of each other, but Taylor knew that Grant, as the oldest, looked out for his siblings with an eagle eye. "I promise you, I won't ever do anything to hurt him." She couldn't leave it there, though. "Not intentionally." She clasped her hands in front of her to try to stop their shaking.

  "You're cold. We should go in."

 
"Not yet. I know you must have terribly mixed feelings about the idea of Justin donating his kidney to me. And I want you to know that I do too. If it turns out that he's a match, I don't know what I'll do. Because I could never live with myself if anything happened to him."

  He stared at her for a long moment. Taylor knew that Grant was never one to make flash judgments or jump to conclusions. He looked at everything from as many angles as possible before making decisions--decisions that were nearly always the right ones. She could hardly breathe as she waited for his response. What if he thought it would be selfish of her to accept Justin's offer?

  "None of us can make Justin's decision for him. Nor can we make yours." He was as serious as she'd ever seen him. "But I want you to know that I understand why he wants to give you one of his kidneys. If I were in his shoes, I believe I would do the same thing."

  Relief swamped her. A beat later, however, she realized relief had come too soon.

  "I didn't want you to come here tonight unaware of the fact that my father is having a tough time with it, though."

  She swallowed hard. "Of course he is."

  "I don't believe he'll actively stand in Justin's way," Grant said, "but at this point, I'm not sure he's ready to support him either."

  Suddenly, Taylor felt every minute of the sleep she'd missed. Her skin felt dry and tight, her limbs heavy, and she had to fight the urge to weep.

  "I won't let him do it." She couldn't stand the thought of coming between Justin and his father. "I'll find another donor, but even if I don't, I won't let my situation pull Justin and your father apart."

  Grant put his hand on her arm as though to soothe her, but she barely noticed. "Dad just needs some time to get used to the idea."

  "No." She'd been right in the beginning when she'd told Justin she couldn't let him be her donor. "I need to tell your father that even if Justin is a match, I won't let him go into surgery. I won't risk anything happening to him."

  "Taylor--" Grant stepped in front of her before she could dash into the cellar to find Michael Morrison. "None of us are going to be able to keep Justin from doing what he wants to do, what he believes is right. He loves you, and he'll do anything for you. And it seems to me that rejecting a donation from him would have as many risks as saying yes. Maybe even more, since he'll never forgive himself if your health takes a turn for the worse and he could have done something to stop it but didn't. Our father just needs some time. He knows how much you mean to Justin and how much Justin means to you. He also knows how much you loved our mother and how much she loved you." It was the most she'd ever heard Grant say at one time, the most impassioned speech she'd ever heard from him. "Grief can make a person blind sometimes," he added in a rough voice, "but he'll come around. Can you trust me on that?"

  She knew what Grant wanted her to say. And even though she'd sworn she wouldn't follow other people's plans for her life anymore, she couldn't stand the thought of spoiling Ashley and Drew's wedding weekend.

  She nodded and forced her lips up into what she hoped was a convincing smile. "I've always trusted you, Grant. You're the best big brother Justin could ever have." Feeling tears about to rush in again, she gave him a hug. "I'm just going to pop into the ladies' room for a second. See you back inside."

  Thankfully, it was a large private room, complete with a small daybed that she could sit on while she put her head in her hands and tried not to feel as though everything had just gone terribly, horribly wrong.

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  Justin hadn't wanted to believe this could happen, but he wasn't blind.

  His father had been avoiding Taylor all night. He'd neither congratulated them on their engagement, nor come over just to say hello. And Justin didn't think it was a coincidence that Drew and Ashley had set up the seating so that Justin and Taylor were on one end of the long table and his father was at the other. Everyone obviously knew Dad had issues with his intention to donate a kidney to Taylor.

  What's more, Justin couldn't miss how subdued Taylor had been after returning from her private talk with Grant. She'd looked pale and guilty, when she had absolutely nothing to feel guilty about. Based on a couple of conversations Justin and Grant had had during the week, he knew Grant was prepared to support his decision to be her donor. The only person Justin hadn't been able to talk things through with was his father--he'd left messages, but none had been returned.

  Earlier, when she'd asked him about his father's reaction to their engagement, Justin had still been firmly in denial about the possibility that he might not support his relationship with Taylor. But that was because he honestly couldn't believe that his father would turn on her out of fear.

  Justin had been gritting his teeth all through dinner. He didn't want to make a scene and ruin Drew and Ashley's celebration--but that didn't mean he would let his father leave without talking with him either.

  The evening should have been great. The food looked fantastic, and his siblings and Ashley's parents were in top form with alternately funny or heartwarming stories about the bride and groom. But Justin couldn't enjoy himself. Not when he could see that Taylor was trying so hard to act like nothing was wrong, with a smile pasted on her face as she laughed in all the right places. He held tightly to her hand, but she wouldn't look at him.

  Somehow, he made it through dinner and dessert and what seemed to be an endless number of toasts. As soon as everyone started to get up from the table, he gave Taylor a kiss, told her he'd be right back, then made a beeline for his father.

  "We need to talk."

  He didn't wait for a response as he headed out of the cave, past the stone patio, and into the first row of vines. The smell of the soil beneath his feet and the crisp night air should have filled him with pleasure. But just as he'd been unable to appreciate the meal and the company tonight, he couldn't ground himself in the beauty of the land either.

  "Justin." His father's voice had him turning, jaw clenched. "I know you love her, but--"

  "Do you?" Fury whipped through Justin as he glared at the man who had always been his hero. "Do you really know how much I love Taylor?" The two of them had never talked about his mother--not really, not in anything more than tiny little remembrances that didn't come anywhere near the heart of their loss. But Justin was done trying to hide from his grief--and he sure as hell wasn't going to allow his father to use his own grief as some sort of weapon against Taylor. "Do you understand that I love her as much as you loved Mom? I know you would have done the same for Mom, with no hesitation at all."

  "Of course I would have," his father replied. "But your mother and I were together for more than thirty years. Whereas, while you and Taylor have known each other since college, you've only been a couple for a week."

  Justin was momentarily speechless, unable to believe that his father would try to pull out the equivalent of a time calculator, or a ruler to measure love, to judge the amount of time appropriate before you could help someone you loved.

  "You always said you fell in love with Mom the day you met." Justin's voice was low, but hard. Never in a million years would he have thought his father wouldn't be on his side, wouldn't go to bat for him, wouldn't support him. Justin was reeling from the shock of it, head to heart. "If you had found out Mom was sick early on in your relationship, do you expect me to believe you would have walked away from her? That you wouldn't have put your own life on the line for hers?"

  Michael looked haggard. "I'm your father. You must understand that I have to put you first. I know how safe most transplant surgeries are, but I also know there are risks--and that not every donor comes out on the safe side of those risks."

  Of course his dad couldn't answer Justin's question. And he didn't need to, because they both knew the answer: Had Lisa Morrison needed a kidney, his father would have cut out his own to give to her with his own hands if it had come to that.

  "Taylor loves you," Justin told his father. "And she loved Mom." His voice felt like it was going to break, and he had to
pause. "You know if Mom was here, she wouldn't stand in my way. Even if she was scared. Even if she didn't like my choice. She would stand beside me, and Taylor, no matter what. No matter the risks."

  "Your mother was the better of the two of us." His father's words were raw and full of pain. "And she isn't here." He rubbed his hand over his eyes, leaving it there as he said, "I can't stop thinking about how much she would have loved to see Drew get married. To think that you want to walk into a hospital and let them put you under, let them cut you open and take out one of your kidneys..."

  His shoulders began to shake, and though Justin was still angry, it didn't diminish how much he loved his father. Justin put his arms around him and held him while he cried.

  It was a long while before his dad could pull himself together. Stepping back, he said, "I don't think I'm making much sense tonight."

  "I know this first wedding among us kids is hard without Mom." Justin's jaw was no longer clenched with anger, though frustration still rode him. "But we're all here for you. And for each other. That isn't going to change." Surely his father would come around once he had more time to see Justin's point of view? "Why don't we head back inside? We can talk more tomorrow."

  "I should probably take a few more minutes alone. You go ahead."

  Justin hated leaving things on such an uncertain note. But while he wasn't going to push any further tonight, he also needed his dad to know one last thing. "Mom always said I got my stubbornness from you. She was right--I'm not going to change my mind on this. And I know it's going to be hard to change yours. But I'm not going to stop trying. Because the one thing I know for sure is that Taylor would never, no matter how badly she needs help, let me give her a kidney if you weren't on board."

  "I'm sorry, Justin." His father sounded beaten down as far as a man could go. "I can't give you my blessing. Not tonight." He looked haggard as he admitted, "Maybe not ever."

  Until that moment, Justin had been absolutely certain that he would be a match and Taylor would agree to the transplant and they would all live happily ever after. But for the first time, Justin felt fear take hold inside of him. Fear that he wouldn't be able to help her the way he wanted to. Fear that no other donor would step forward in time.