Always Forever
Mason grunts, regaining my attention. He gives me a flat, knowing look and points the knife at me. “This guy needs to shut the hell up and cut vegetables.”
31
Misty
After dinner, which was delicious by the way, I spent a couple of hours catching up with Hope. Now Kellin and I are back at his place, debating over which movie to watch.
I drop onto the couch, leaning against the arm. “Where’s Roh?” I ask as I empty my pockets of the suckers I stole from Hope’s giant candy dish. Choosing a red one, I rip the wrapper free and place it on my tongue. The sweet flavor registers and I make a small appreciative sound.
Kellin lowers himself beside me, getting comfortable. “Don’t know. Don’t care.” He grips the end of the sucker stick, surprising me when he tugs it from my mouth and slides it into his own.
It takes me a moment to register how incredibly sexy I find this. I realize my mouth is still hanging open and snap it closed. “Well that was rude.” I try for playful, but my voice sounds coarse and breathy because Kellin’s words replay in my head—I’m not hitting on you. Trust me, there’ll be no doubt in your mind when I do that.
His eyebrows rise as he grins around the sucker. “You’re right.” He pulls it from his lips, holding it out to me. “Sorry. You can have it back.”
There are ten other suckers sitting on the table, three of which are the same exact flavor. I could just as easily take one of those. But I don’t.
Right here. This is when I reach my breaking point. I sweep my hair to one shoulder and lean forward, wrapping my mouth around the sucker and gently pulling it from his hand.
“Thanks,” I say softly.
Kellin swallows, the sound audible in the otherwise quiet room. His tongue skims his bottom lip. His hands curl into fists. “I think I want it back,” he utters.
I tilt my head, blinking slowly. “What will you give me for it?”
There’s a second where Kellin looks completely stunned that I’m blatantly flirting with him, which I find kind of insulting. It’s not like I don’t know how to flirt. I’m actually pretty good at it when I want to be.
The shock slowly dissipates and he gives me a cocky smile. His mouth opens with what I expect to be one hell of an offer, and my phone rings. I almost ignore it, but I need to verify it isn’t important.
I push my back into the couch and pry my cell from my pocket. Luke’s face smiles up at me from the screen, making my stomach churn. Kellin shifts beside me, drawing my gaze. His narrowed eyes lift from my phone a second after mine do.
It feels like we’re in some sort of standoff. He’s daring me to take the call and I’m wishing he could understand.
“You should probably answer that,” Kellin rasps. I slide my thumb over the screen, silencing it as he stands.
My heart beats quickly inside my chest. I follow him into the kitchen, trying to calm my throbbing pulse. The effort is futile because I know it’s about to get a lot worse.
He pulls the refrigerator open, notices me in the doorway, and shuts it without taking anything out. “That was quick,” he murmurs.
“I didn’t answer.”
“Why not?”
I moisten my dry lips. “Because I’m here with you.”
His dark brows crinkle, his eyes flicking over my face. “What does that even mean, Misty?”
“I’m here, with you,” I repeat.
“You’ve been with me for weeks. I’ve watched you take his calls probably ten times. What’s different now?” He takes a step toward me, continuing before I have a chance to answer. “Why are you here? What do you want from me?”
There are too many questions and no easy answers. I shake my head, trying to find the correct way to explain.
“He doesn’t love you,” Kellin breathes. “I know because he let you go.” He stalks forward and I back up instinctively. His voice is gentle—but his words, his demeanor, and the heat in his eyes are not.
My back hits the wall, halting my retreat.
He stops less than an inch away from me, his heaving chest skimming mine with each of his breaths. “Because if he was really in love with you, the thought of you being with anyone else would break his heart.” He closes his eyes as if cutting me off from view. “And I know that because the thought of you going back to him is killing me.”
He shakes his head slowly, his expression pained. “I die a little more each day knowing my time is running out and you’ll be gone in less than two months.”
Hot tears blur my vision. My stomach twists, my heart thumping frantically. I’m pretty sure, in a roundabout way, Kellin Patel just told me he’s in love with me.
“What do you want from me?” he questions again, his voice barely more than a whisper.
32
Kellin
Seven
“What do you want from me?” I repeat hoarsely for the third time.
The silence stretches. I can feel every shaky breath she takes. I open my eyes and meet her gaze. I’ve said everything I can right now. I don’t know how I could possibly be any more honest with her.
“Seven weeks,” she croaks.
“What?”
“That’s what I want,” she says, her voice quivering over every word. “The next seven weeks. With you. No regrets about the past. No plans for the future. Just seven weeks.”
My gut reaction is to argue. Fuck seven weeks. I want more. I want seven months. Seven years. I don’t want an end date.
As the thought of having her at all, regardless of a time limit, actually sinks in, I decide I’ll take what I can get.
And that’s the last thought I have. My body takes over, doing all the things I’ve been yearning to do.
I take that final step separating us, closing the distance. My chest slams into hers. My hands are steady, certain, as I reach up to cup either side of her face. I angle her head and look into her eyes, making sure she understands what I’m about to do.
Right here, at this exact moment, I realize she’s exactly what I’ve been searching for my whole life. Someone to make me feel the way I feel right now. This exhilarating mix of fear, motivation, desire, and joy.
It’s the ultimate adrenaline rush.
The longest fall off a cliff.
The greatest initiative to succeed.
The softest caress.
And the purest laughter.
It’s terrible and it’s beautiful. And it’s mine.
I inch forward, waiting for her eyes to fall closed. I can feel the moist warmth of her breath on my lips as she exhales sharply.
Seven weeks.
I’m going to utilize every last second.
I press my mouth to hers, sliding my tongue along the seam of her soft lips. She opens for me, inviting me inside, and I accept immediately.
This doesn’t resemble our first kiss at all. It’s not soft or sweet. Neither one of us are gentle or timid. There’s no surprise or uncertainty. This kiss is ravenous. Unrestrained. And aware of our deadline.
Misty grips the sides of my shirt, bunching it in her fists. Her hips flex into mine, her back arching off the wall. I slide my hand down, locking it around the back of her thigh, and lift her leg to accommodate myself. I slip in closer, letting her feel the evidence of my physical need for her.
A sound echoes in her chest, announcing her approval or appreciation.
It’s the only prompting I need. I curve my hand around her ass, picking her up and guiding her legs around my hips. For a moment, I let her balance between me and the wall as I break the kiss long enough to yank my shirt over my head.
I discard it and wrap my hands around her once again. Her lips find mine, continuing what I started. I shift us, pulling away from the wall. Misty yelps in surprise and then laughs against my mouth.
Her arms are locked around my neck, her legs around my waist. I stumble through the living room, palming the wall in search of my door. When I finally find it, I hurry forward until I feel my legs hit the mattress, and drop her onto t
he bed without warning.
She squeals, bouncing on her butt. The sound is so goddamn happy. It makes me feel like a fucking superhero knowing I’m the reason behind her pleasure.
I reach for her, wanting to rid her of her clothing, and realize the blanket on the bed isn’t mine. I pause halfway toward her and look around.
“This isn’t my room,” I say. I wonder how pissed off Roh would be if we had sex in his bedroom. I shrug. Guess I’ll find out. Before Misty can comment, I grasp the hem of her shirt and slide it up her stomach. I keep going, exposing a pale blue bra. I get tangled in her hair for just a moment before finally getting it over her head.
I try to smooth her locks back into place, but she looks like she’s been thoroughly kissed. It’s a good look for her. But I think we can do better.
Using the pressure of my body, I guide her backward until she’s lying flat on the bed. I hold myself over her, looking down at her face. It’s surreal to finally be here. I want her to know how much I care about her. I want to tell her how much I love her.
But I hold back. If there’s even the slightest chance my feelings could get in the way of this, I’m keeping them locked up safely.
Misty’s legs curl around mine, her feet resting on my ass. She nudges me, drawing me down until I’m flat against her. She nibbles my lip before kissing me languidly, her fingers soft and warm against my jaw.
I want her more than I have ever wanted anyone else in my life, but just this—the feel of her skin, the taste of her mouth—could keep me content for the rest of my life.
That thought makes my chest ache.
I don’t have the rest of my life.
Forever doesn’t belong to me.
33
Misty
Something changes in the way Kellin is touching me. Each caress grows gentler, softer, as if he’s afraid he’ll break me. Or scare me.
But I’m not made of glass and I want this.
I wouldn’t be here with him right now if I didn’t.
I apply a little pressure to his chest and he pulls back. His eyes meet mine, a silent question in his gaze. He rolls to his side and I keep pushing until he falls to his back. Swinging my leg over his hips, I straddle him, resting my weight onto his thighs.
“I saw you before you saw me,” I whisper. “That very first time, when we were kids. I watched you for probably twenty minutes before you finally noticed me.”
I unhook the clasp of my bra, letting the straps slide down my arms. I pull my hands free and let it drop away, baring my breasts to him. His eyes follow the rise and fall of my chest as my breathing accelerates.
“I had the worst time concentrating on my homework,” I continue. My fingers start on the button of his jeans, popping it open. I slide his zipper next, letting his erection spring free.
“To this day, I can still remember what we were both wearing. I had on one of Annie’s old shirts—white with tiny blue polka dots.” I slip off the bed, dragging his jeans down his legs.
He remains quiet, but leans back on his elbows, watching me.
“You,” I go on as I undo the tie on my shorts, “were wearing a plain gray t-shirt and black jeans.” I wiggle out of my shorts and climb up Kellin’s body. His hands curl around my hips, drawing me closer.
“Your hair always fell into your eyes.” I brush his hair back from his face, my fingertips trailing down behind his ear. His heated eyes haven’t left me once. “And I always longed to run my fingers through it.”
“Always?” he asks, his dimples denting his cheeks as he smiles.
“Always,” I confirm. I sweep my lips across his, savoring the way he tastes. His palms flatten against my back. I move against him, gliding my hips over his.
Kellin hisses in pleasure, rolling us over so I’m the one laying down. He pushes up onto his knees, working his fingers into the waist of my panties. He hesitates, his eyes flicking up to my face to read my expression. I bite down on my lip and lift my butt off the bed.
All reservation gone, he slips the thin material past my hips and down my legs. I feel my body grow warm as his hungry stare rakes over my bare body from my toes, all the way up.
“When I first saw you, I thought you were the prettiest girl I had ever seen,” he husks. “And every time I saw you after, you grew more and more beautiful.”
He works his boxers down until he can kick them onto the floor. I take my time, letting my gaze feast on his naked form. The silky smoothness of his erection begs to be touched.
I reach for him, circling my fingers around his length. He bucks into my hand, a noise, low and guttural reverberates in his throat.
“I want you,” I breathe.
Kellin leans in placing a kiss on my lips, then one to my forehead. He pulls a drawer open on the stand beside the bed, then another drawer. I hear the crinkle of foil as he sits back on his heels, rolling the condom on.
I can’t believe this is getting ready to happen.
I close my eyes and inhale deeply.
“We don’t have to do this,” Kellin murmurs.
My eyes pop open and I shake my head adamantly. “I want to. I’ve always wanted to.”
He grins down at me. “Always?”
“Always.”
“Me too,” he says. “When I saw you at Hope’s graduation…” He trails off, his cheeks turning a soft shade of pink. It’s so damn cute I can’t take it.
“What?”
I feel him at my entrance and it ignites a fire in my veins.
“Let’s just say you were the sole benefactor of my spank bank.”
I laugh, but my humor fades quickly as he presses into me. I open my legs wider for him, wanting him closer. My fingernails dig into his back muscles as he thrusts again, going deeper.
The air expels from my lips on a moan. Kellin moves faster. I wrap my legs around him, clinging to him tighter. The mix of sensations and emotions is something I’ve never experienced in my life.
It feels so good, almost too good. But my eyes sting like I want to cry. My chest feels tights, my throat clogged. I can’t get close enough. I can’t hold him tight enough.
And I know without a shadow of a doubt, this is what making love feels like.
34
Kellin
I move a strand of hair from her cheek and watch her sleep. Her cheeks are flushed, her lips parted.
I’m afraid to look away. I’m afraid she’ll disappear or I’ll wake up and realize this was all just a dream.
Seven weeks.
Seven weeks.
Seven weeks.
It pounds through my head like a jackhammer.
I have to change her mind. I have to make her stay.
Or I’ll fucking follow her back to Ohio. I don’t care.
Or we can do the long distance thing.
Just as long as she doesn’t marry Luke.
Fuck.
FUCK.
FUUUUUCK.
I feel like I’m choking. I’m drowning in misery and I’ve never been happier in my life. It’s the sickest contradiction.
I pull the blanket up, draping it over her body. We should probably get out of here before Roh gets home, but I don’t want to wake her. I slip out of bed slowly, careful not to jostle her, and pull my boxers on.
I stand there, at the foot of the bed, staring at her. And all that’s going through my head is, I can’t lose her.
Seven.
Seven.
Seven.
I work my hands underneath Misty and lift her into my arms. Sound asleep, she nuzzles into my neck, her breath tickling the hair there. I take her into my room, lying her on my bed. Right where she belongs.
After I have her settled, I take the stairs two at a time up to the attic. Most of her belongings are still in her suitcase. I grab the few items she left out and shove them inside, zipping it closed. I pluck her blanket off the mattress on the floor, and bring everything down to my room.
When I only have weeks left, I’m utilizing the day and
the night.
I crawl into bed with her, tugging her against me, and finally close my eyes.
~*~
“Morning,” Roh announces from the doorway. He scoops a large bite of cereal into his mouth, smirking at me while he chews. I glance sideways, making sure Misty is still in my bed.
She is, and I smile.
I adjust the blanket, making sure she’s completely covered before returning my attention to Roh.
“So how was your night?” he asks casually. “Anything…interesting happen?”
I chuckle softly. “Shut the fuck up and go away. She likes to sleep in.”
He points his spoon at me. “I want details, Jimmy.” He pivots on his heel, pauses, and spins back around. “And an explanation as to why your guys’ shit is all over my room. That better have been foreplay only because if I find out you nutted in my bed, I’ll be forced to return the favor.” He narrows his eyes, taking another bite. His jaw works, chewing slowly as he backs out of my room.
“I won’t tell if you don’t,” Misty grumbles into the pillow.
“Good morning.” I sweep the mess of hair from her face and brush a kiss against her cheek.
She sits up and there it is, that thoroughly fucked hair. She stretches her arms out in front of her, the blanket sliding down and pooling around her waist. The whole image is sexy as hell. The messy locks and rosy skin, combined with her bare breast, nipples hardening with the cool morning air.
Noticing where my attention has gone, Misty picks the edge of the blanket up, and rolls to her side, tugging it over our heads. One of her legs slides in between mine, the other resting on my thigh.
I slip my hand to the apex of her legs, my fingers caressing her gently. She moans, moving against me.
“I think I could become a morning person if this is what I’m going to wake up to.”
35
Misty
Six
I ignore the shocked stares and gasps of surprise, the murmurs of disapproval and giggles of amusement. I block it all out and keep walking. My pace picks up speed with each step I take until I push through the double doors of the closest establishment I can find.