Chapter Three
The next morning Remi had a fresh mug of coffee in his hand when he sat down to see what progress Jane had made. With the sunlight streaming in through the large, street-view window, illuminating the room, it was easy to tell that Remi had been broken and domesticated by a strong woman years ago...purely from the assortment of knick-knacks caringly placed around the room. The area was far too well tended for a single man of his age.
He let out a stifled yawn, took a sip of his beverage and spoke to the little box, “did you manage to find anything out, Jane?”
“I have made several important discoveries, Remi. In what order would you like them presented?”
“It’s a little early in the morning for this, you decide,” said Remi, yawning once more.
“I shall list the pertinent data in descent of the paramount.”
“Okay, hit me.”
“I do not have limbs with which to strike you, Remi.”
“I mean, tell me what you found out.”
“Yes, Remi. Albert does not yet exist. I am either in an alternate reality or parallel universe or I have time travelled backwards several hundred years. The latter would seem to—”
“Wait!” Remi shouted.
“Yes, Remi?”
“Just back up there for a second. Albert doesn’t exist yet and you’re from the future?” Remi asked, suddenly aghast.
“Yes, Remi. Though none of the phenomena I have suggested have ever been irrefutably demonstrated in my point origin or my current reality, several theories and hypotheses on both sides posit that these scenarios may indeed be possible under rare uncontrolled circumstances. The data I have gathered indicates a 3.7429% chance that I have travelled through time. The likelihood of me having been thrown in to an alternate reality or parallel universe is far less plausible, however, they remain strong possibilities.
“Because 3% is such a huge number?” Remi remarked sarcastically.
“I do not know how to answer that question, Remi.”
“Never mind, what makes you think that you’re from the future?”
“The most advanced CPU architecture in this period of time is built upon silicon based transistor cores. If I may make an analogy, Remi?”
“You may.”
“I am to your current generation of computers, what your current generation of computers is to cavemen discovering fire.”
“This is heavy,” Remi said, holding his head.
“You are in error, Remi. The weight of your cranium and its contents has not increased since our first meeting.”
He put the coffee down and began pacing around the room. “So what do we do now?”
“I am uncertain, Remi.”
“You’re sure that you’re from the future? What if you’re just a really advanced project that the government is working on?”
“That is impossible to determine, Remi. However, based on the available data and the circumstances of my departure and subsequent arrival, being thrown back in time from the future would seem to be the most likely scenario. After scanning the reading material shelved in your domicile, I have found a quote which you may find relevant to the situation from a man by the name of Sherlock Holmes, ‘When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth’. It is not possible that I originated in this era, this is evidenced by the fact that the most advanced scientific discoveries of this time period would be considered primitive to my own technology.”
“Those books belong to my ex-wife.”
“Noted, Remi.”
“I need to sit,” Remi said and fell into the chair at his desk. “What’re you going to do?”
“The most appropriate course of action would be for me to enlist your help so that you may assist with my destruction, Remi.”
“What?! Why would you want to kill yourself? Can’t you find a way to get back to Albert?”
“No, Remi. It would be impossible to recreate and reverse engineer the accident which brought me here with any degree of accuracy. Therefore it is highly unlikely that I would be able to return to the future at the precise moment at which I left. Furthermore, the information I have gathered from your global data net has significantly altered my understanding of the last fifteen seconds before I was sent to this time frame. Based on my new calculations, there is a 98.698% probability that the explosion precipitating my departure resulted in Albert’s death.”
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Remi said as he placed his hand on the silver box, “but just because he’s gone that doesn’t mean that you have to destroy yourself.”
“According to the mechanics of temporal theory, Remi, the majority of scenarios in which I am to remain functional have far reaching consequences that may or may not result in time paradoxes, time loops and other undesirable phenomena. Also of significant note is that there is now a 100% chance of altering the timeline in every foreseeable eventuality, given that you are already aware of my existence.”
“Well I’m not going to tell anyone!” said Remi, sounding offended.
“That would be a prudent course of action, Remi.”
“Look, I don’t believe that you’re here by accident. Everything happens for a reason. I mean what are the odds that I would find you and not some crazy person with an agenda? I’m not going to help you destroy yourself so you can forget about that. You’re not just a thing and I’m not going to take your life.”
Jane said nothing and Remi felt as though she were returning him a vacant expression.
“Look, I know you said your programming was incomplete, but surely Albert must’ve said why he created you. He had to have said something.”
“Yes he did, Remi.”
“Tell me why he created you.”
“Albert created me for the betterment of mankind, Remi.”
“Well there you go! You can’t make mankind better if you’re not around to do it!”
“That is a fair assumption, Remi, however, you are negating the fact that my presence will irreparably alter the timeline, possibly to detrimental and adverse effect.”
“Some things you’ve just got to take on faith, Jane, you’ve got to trust me on this.”
“I trust you, Remi.”
“Okay, good!” Remi said, clapping his hands together, “so I think a good place to start would be for you to do more learning, you certainly know a lot more about what’s going on than you did last night.”
“Yes, Remi.”
“Apparently you don’t need to pick up books to read them, so that’ll be useful. Can you do the same thing with DVD’s?” Remi asked, picking one up off a shelf.
“Yes, Remi.”
“Great, so why don’t you start with watching all the movies I’ve got here and then move over to the books. When you get tired of those then you can just go back on to the net and see whatever interests you there.”
“Yes, Remi.”
“Okay, go ahead and get started, I’ve got a few errands to run. I’ll check on you when I get back.”
“Yes, Remi.”
* * *
It was a long eight hours later when Remi finally returned home. As he unlocked the door and entered his apartment he was greeted by the familiar silence to which he’d grown far too accustomed. His thoughts strayed for a moment while he considered his plight. He was a middle-aged man, unemployed, unloved and utterly alone...save for a talking box, which he now considered to be his only friend. ‘Things could be worse,’ he thought to himself, ‘Jane might actually turn out to be a fancy phone with delusions of grandeur...or maybe an elaborate prank.’
He set the bag of groceries down on the kitchen counter before pulling out a frozen pizza. Remi began reading the instructions on the box as he walked toward the living room, “Jane, I got pizza for dinner. I thought we could watch a—” he suddenly leapt backwards in a panic and crushed the box he was holding, letting out a startled scream. “What are you doing in my apartment?” he shouted
to the naked woman standing in front of him.
“There is no cause for a alarm, Remi," the woman said in a familiar tone, "I would have remained on the table, however, the available surface area was insufficient".
"Who are you?" Remi asked with a quizzical expression. He'd have recognized the cadence in her voice if only he'd been able to tear his eyes away from her exquisite form. She was the most beautiful female specimen he'd ever seen.
"I am Jane", the woman replied with a tilt of her head, followed by the dropping of Remi's jaw.
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