Feather: Book One
As Edgar let his arm go, I watched in horror as Matthew’s neck twisted in a gruesome and inhuman manner and his body flew across the rocks, shearing into the earth as shards flew into the air and speared back down to the ground with a rumble.
“Edgar!” I yelled, running to him as his eyes met mine, his face both relieved and terrified.
I ran into his arms, my soul bursting like a torch, “Edgar I’m sorry.”
“This is not the time for apologies Elle,” his voice was frantic and his breathing sharp and quick. He suddenly tossed my body to the side as Matthew lunged at us, his teeth bared in anger and his neck clearly broken. Sam jumped and grabbed me away as the dagger went flying by my face in Matthew’s hands.
As Sam saved me from Matthew’s aim, Matthew instead plowed into Edgar’s chest, his face suddenly searing with pain. Edgar fell back hard and heavy, breath escaping from his lips as his eyes met mine.
“No!” My voice was shrill as they both hit the ground, the earth rumbling like a deep earthquake. I tried to steady myself in Sam’s iron grasp as Matthew stood over Edgar, staggering back with blood dripping from the dagger in his hand.
Gasping, I looked at the blood in horror as a malicious sneer snaked across Matthew’s face. I screamed in sudden anger and my hateful eyes burst like sirens as my arms tingled in anguish. My soul was suddenly hot with life, the reason stinging like a knife in my memory, the feelings flooding back to me as my soul returned, and Edgar began dying.
I forced my body out of Sam’s heavy grasp, my breath thick and hot in my mouth. I walked toward Matthew with clenched fists, my stride fast and arrogant. He stepped back with a sudden fear, realizing what had happened to me as my body seemed to grow with strength and a deep look of terror filled his face as my eyes reflected in his. The roots were suddenly more powerful than before, and they wrapped his legs in thick knots of which he could not escape.
“You spiteful devil!” I yelled. My voice was so strong that it caused the trees to shake in fear. Matthew dropped the dagger to the ground with a shudder, his body reeling back as I advanced but his feet were bound. “If you think you’re getting away with this, you’re sick,” my voice was hissing. I glanced toward Edgar, his chest still heaving but the life now void from his beautiful eyes and now alive in mine.
I turned back to Matthew, his face contorted and bleeding.
“You killed my friends, my family!” My voice was cracking in grief and my heart throbbed with pain. “You underestimate the power of love, of happiness.” I grabbed his throat as my power over him surprised me. The roots now engulfed half his body, as though pulling him to Hell. “You had it all wrong Matthew. We had the power then,” my thoughts flashed to the painting, our happiness, or love, and his discontent with it all. “We were the ones with the power, and you,” I paused squeezing his neck harder, his dark emotionless eyes popping out of his freakishly distorted face, “You’re nothing more than a pathetic snake!”
Pulling my arm back, I punched him in the chest and he doubled over, the roots pressing him to the ground in helpless agony. Kneeling down, I grabbed the bloodied dagger from the grass as it lifted it toward me. “You won’t take it from me!” I yelled down at him, my eyes now illuminating the ground where he coiled like a coward. Sam watched me, his gaze looking from Matthew to me.
I raised my hands over my head, both grasping the handle of the dagger as they trembled in fear and anxiety, “You deserve this! I only hope that the gods don’t take pity on your blood stained soul.” And with that, I thrust the dagger down through his chest, stabbing it into his heart and digging it deep into the earth as all the ravens in the field shrieked, taking to the sky in a shroud of black.
His body ceased writhing and his eyes drained of all color, the silver returning as his body began to coil and change. His black feathers pierced through his skin until nothing but a lifeless raven lay dead before me. I heard Sam’s heavy breathing behind me, his cold hands now firmly resting on my shoulder.
I stood there as the thick rain filtered over my body, my breathing fast and angry. I twisted to look back at Edgar as he lay still on the rocky earth.
“Edgar,” my voice was frantic and soft as I ran to his side. “Edgar,” I put my hands to his face, shaking him, beckoning for him to wake, “Edgar no, no don’t.” I panted in eager breaths but his skin was cold under my touch. Sam arrived at his other side, his eyes scanning Edgar’s wound.
As I stared at my dying love his eyes opened but his breathing was dangerously shallow as Sam worked to mend him.
“Edgar, you’re going to be ok,” I gasped.
He tried to raise his arm and bring it to my face, but he couldn’t. The blood gushed from his chest as the warm liquid drained from his veins. A tear rolled down my cheek as his eyes began to change, the blue filtering out to the edges until there was nothing but a faint grey. The glittering had gone and his gaze was now empty and plain. Sam continued to work on him but I knew his efforts were worthless.
I put my head to Edgar’s chest but his heart wouldn’t beat. “Edgar no,” I whispered, “Please, I love you.” I was sobbing with uncontrolled grief, my soul beginning to burn deeper than ever. Sam stopped and grabbed my face, his cold touch like a knife against my chin. His gold eyes searched mine, his face apologizing as he wrapped his wings around us.
The earth around Edgar came to life in a sudden display of light and the roots twined their way around his neck and across his chest. I fell back in horror as Sam’s wings cradled me. Though I tried, I couldn’t stop the roots from engulfing him as they grew into his wounds and pulled him hard against the ground. I turned away in fear as Sam picked me off the damp muddy grass, pulling me away from Edgar as he sank under the surface of the earth. I pushed my face into Sam’s stone cold chest, my warm tears streaming onto his shirt where they turned to icicles when they touched his skin.
“Edgar!” I cried, my hands gripping into Sam’s skin. Sam cradled me in his arms as I watched the ground where Edgar had disappeared begin to grow. Large branches now reached toward the sky and a giant redwood towered over us.
My body trembled as my head became eerily clear. I squeezed my eyes shut as memories seared through me like a floodgate opening to my mind. Sam turned me away from the scene, his wings wrapping tighter around our bodies in his attempt to shield me from the rain and sorrow. I winced in pain as I pulled my knees to my chin, my chest bursting open like the hot sun.
I could feel Sam’s cold breath against my face as he desperately tried to comfort me, to cool my nerves. As the heat became too great to handle, the torture ceased and everything was silent. I breathed hard as I opened my eyes, my sharp sight looking into Sam’s.
In slow steps, he released his grip and my body melted to the ground. My gaze caught sight of a black feather as it fell toward me from the blackened branches above. I shut my eyes in disbelief, tears pouring through my lashes and streaming hot down my cheeks and onto my neck. Opening my eyes again, I raised one trembling hand toward the spiraling black feather, catching it by the quill. I let out one shaky breath as my insides crippled in sadness, my soul blistering with life.
HALF LIFE
My feet melted onto the ground as Sam set me down as his wings cut through the air of the forest. I stood in the shadows under the evergreens, my breathing steady and shallow and my heart heavy. The familiar Meadow had changed since winter and the spring flowers fragrantly blew toward us on the mist of the forest wind, reminding me that life still continued, despite my desire for it all to stop.
A defeated sigh escaped my lips and I took one step into the opening as Sam stood back within the trees, the sun glistened down onto my skin and the grasses bowing in obedient appreciation. Isabelle burst from thin air as she flew from the lonely house, her wings flapping with anxiety in her eager approach.
She let out a shrill cry as she crashed into my arms, her wings flailing as she struggled to right herself. Laughing, I smiled at her and her eyes glinted as though she
already knew that I had come home alone. I watched her grasping onto my forearm, clicking to me and twisting my pearly skin. She glanced at Sam with a thankful wink before turning her sharp gaze back to me.
“Hello girl,” I sang, my voice light and re-born.
Sam’s light laugh filtered through the trees of the forest, “She’s happy you’re back.”
Isabelle fluffed her feathers as I walked deeper into the meadow, remembering its beauty, its warmth. As I came to a halt in the middle of the opening, the flowers around me bloomed as I allowed them to welcome me home. Isabelle eyed them with a wary glare before leaping from my arm, spiraling skyward on a gust of wind and meeting Henry as they intertwined. Guilt filled my heart as I saw that Henry held back, mourning the loss of his friend, and father.
Sam walked to my side, his wings now tucked away behind him. As he stood beside me I noticed how his white skin contrasted with the luscious green grass. The circles under his eyes dark but his pupils a warm bronze and his gaze caught mine as he smiled, the corners of his mouth still shaking with certain sadness.
“Well Estella,” his voice was angelic, “You’re home now.” His consoling gaze was hard to look into. I still refused to believe that Edgar was gone.
I sighed, placing my warm hand against his frozen face, “Thank you Sam.”
The long winter had been painful, and my return was a long time coming. After my soul found its place back inside the empty space in my chest, it was hard to find myself, hard to realize where Edgar had gone and what had happened to me. It was as though a life had been gained, but then half was also lost.
After that night, I spent weeks just sitting there, my tears blooming a forest around us and the craters the fight had created gorging into hot springs of life. The redwood where Edgar had died flourished, glowing with unearthly power and strength, the wood almost black.
It was like I’d stored three hundred years of love for him inside my soul, and it suddenly all poured out. He had nurtured that feeling for me, held it within him while I had left him alone. But now it was my turn and I was going to fight.
Sam had stayed with me, his duties as my Guardian angel binding him to me for life. As long as I needed him he would always be there, and in his friendship, I hoped to find happiness and strength. I hoped to move on.
I had been angry at the entire world around me in those days. Everything was thriving when half of me was gone. It angered me that despite my continuing sorrow, the cycle of life still dredged on.
Shuddering, I recalled how it felt to burn Matthew’s dead body, my soul wrought with grief and hatred. Matthew was gone, hopefully forever, but the future was uncertain. Matthew had died from the same weapon, in the same manner as Edgar but when they had left this world, they left it differently, as though telling me there was still hope.
Before I left the hillsides of London, I carved two ravens into the redwood that had bloomed over Edgar’s body, hoping that one day, he could see that, and remember. Though he was gone, I refused to believe forever. He was the only thing that mattered to me now, and I would devote my life to finding an answer, if not an ending.
As I now stood in the meadow of the Cascades, watching Henry and Isabelle celebrate my return, I couldn’t help but feel Edgar here, his essence, and even his scent. His intoxicating life lingered as a gloomy reminder. I knelt to the ground, allowing my legs to rest in the tall grass.
Reaching into my belt hook, I retrieved the dagger and held it as the gold gleamed in the sun. A tear fell from my face and I stabbed it into the soft earth with a promise to avenge my love. My soul was aching with the absence of its warmth, a feeling I used to long to feel, but no longer could. If there was still a way to pass this blame, I would, killing everyone that set it up, and making sure that in the end, this could never happen to another soul.
Sam put one cold hand on my back as he looked skyward, praying for Edgar toward the heavens. He did not know how to feel love or pain so in the years since his death he had felt nothing, much like I had before. Sam could read my thoughts, and so he knew how to comfort me, but it did little to calm my nerves.
Being back allowed a flood of memories to return. I thought about that day when I was taken, cursed myself for being stubborn and careless. There were so many things that had happened and I was determined to find out what it all meant, determined to find the white cat. I needed to figure out exactly why it had lured me out of the house and into imminent doom.
I scanned the trees with a new sense of purpose. My plan was to wait it out, let the white cat come back to me. The cat knew something, and it was my only lead into my new world. Being stubborn has its advantages. I refuse to wait three hundred years for an answer, no matter what it takes.
My body was now reunited with my soul, complete in essence, but not in spirit. My new senses were going to help me unravel this next chapter of my life. I would fight an eternity for Edgar if I had to, and if eternity comes, then I’ll leave this life forever.
Sam knelt down next to me and I laid back into his chest, my mind suddenly eager for sleep, eager to see Edgar’s face in my endless dreams. I shut my eyes to the sun as Sam began to hum in my ear, the same hum my foster mother had lulled me with all my life. He placed his cold hand on my forehead and sleep rushed over me, and I instantly remembered.
Just as I had seen in my dream my first days at the college, I was standing in the same meadow. The air was misty and warm, like summer. I felt safe and secure as I peeked down at my body, finding my soul searing with love and my hands even more brilliant then ever before.
My eyes shot up as Edgar appeared from the shadows of the woods, like a ghost within the misty field of my dream. As I noticed him, I smiled, a feeling I’d missed bursting in my soul. The sudden burn made me gasp for air as I struggled to recognize the warm sensation. As he approached, I brought one hand to my face, feeling a tear roll over my soft skin as I realized he was home, and the feeling was love.
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Book Two, Guardian, takes us deeper into the myth and deeper into the world of Estella, the magical creature destined to save this world. Though she finds her love is gone, she is not alone and as the events unfold she finds hope and the undeniable desire to rise above her fears, and face her demons…
Join her as she travels to the ends of the earth, finding old friends and new companions in the most unlikely of places. See how Feather transforms into a story of its own in Guardian, into the myth that engulfs us and proves we are never alone…
BOOK TWO: GUARDIAN (Sample)
BABY STEPS
The cold granite felt like steel against my head as I lay on the top landing of the stairs, pondering my next move. I took a few calm measured breaths, allowing my eyes to stay closed as my heart raced. I hadn’t ever gotten this far, not until now. The closest I had gotten to my room was yesterday when I finally laid one foot on the bottom step, and now here I was, at the top, my body trembling with fear and sorrow like a nervous idiot.
Slowly, I began to draw my eyelids open like a curtain at a play. I felt the granite under my sweaty palms, my arms sprawled out at my sides and my legs cascading down the stairs. I rolled my head to the right, looking at the doors to my room with sad recollection.
It had been nearly two months since I’d been back at the house, but I still couldn’t bring myself to go back to my room, to see what I feared would be a scene of sadness and loss. I had taken to sleeping on the couch in the sitting room, despite Sam’s attempts to encourage me to face the facts, and move on. He didn’t understand how this felt, he didn’t know what sorrow was anymore, or fear. He was dead, inside and out.
I drew in a heavy breath and held it as it stung my lungs. Carefully, I rolled my head to the other side, my eyes falling on the doors to Edgar’s mysterious room, a place I couldn’t even fathom visiting. I had never seen it, at least n
ot in my current recollection, but it still seemed like an imaginary place, a place that had never really existed.
Although I had gotten my soul back when Edgar’s heart had ceased to beat, it hadn’t given me all of my memory. There were certain things that slowly trickled back, like my expert knowledge for chess, and of course my heightened sense of sight, and sound, but not my memory.
I exhaled as I drew my head back to the center, staring at the gold leaf ceiling. I wrenched my tired body up as I leaned my chin into my hands and placed my feet on the top step. Dragging my fingers across my tired eyes, I heard the swift cutting of wings echoing through the large entry foyer.
My hands dropped to my lap as I looked up, seeing Henry and Isabelle circle the chandelier and sharply dodge toward me. They landed on the top landing as their talons slipped, grinding across the granite like fingernails on a chalkboard. I winced at the shrill noise as they clicked their way back toward me with haste, each rubbing their head against my arm like cats often would.
In the passing months, Henry had grafted himself to me as though he were solely mine. I knew he missed Edgar. There was a glimmer in his eye that was unmistakable and sad. He looked to me as his foster mother now, and that was definitely something I could relate with.
I sighed with a heavy heart as I scratched them both on the head. This trip to my room was always destined to be a failed attempt, but I had at least gotten to the top landing. I looked up as my eyes caught the glimmer of something standing in the center of the entry. Sam was smiling at me as he stood there in angelic silence. It was frustrating that even I could not hear him moving in his soundless existence.