Becoming Calder

  We both looked down at our feet. Our sandals were barely hanging on, the straps that crisscrossed over our feet in serious danger of snapping and the soles coming loose so each time we stepped, they slapped against the ground.

  Calder looked behind me and pointed. I turned around and looked through a break in the trees. The city looked close. Hope rose up in my chest and I turned back around to Calder, grinning. "How far do you think?" I asked in a rush of words.

  Calder scratched his chin and looked over at Xander who was slowly standing up. "Three hours maybe?"

  Xander kept looking in the direction of the city and then back at Calder. "You carried me all this way?" he asked, his voice very quiet.

  "Yeah," Calder said, looking over at him. "You'd have done it for me, too."

  Xander just studied him for a minute, his eyes filled with emotion. "Yeah," he said, the word sounding slightly strangled. "Yeah." He looked back out to the city, seeming to get his emotions under control.

  "How's your back?" Calder asked.

  Xander moved a little as if testing it. "It feels like a million bucks," Xander said. "Too bad we can't sell it for cash."

  Calder grinned and then without speaking, we all turned and began to walk again. I had been exhausted, almost falling down with tiredness before we'd come upon the houses. But now I felt energized. We were so close.

  We briefly told Xander what had happened with Hector and why I'd called them. His jaw was hard and he said, "You did the right thing, Eden."

  After that, we walked silently again, Calder leading the way and Xander in the rear, the only sound our flapping sandals. When I glanced back at him, Xander still looked slightly out of it, like he was trying to clear the fog in his head. But his legs were working just fine and I was thankful Calder didn't have to bear his weight anymore.

  Again we stuck to the areas next to the road that provided the most cover. Luckily, even though the large rocks were few and far between now, the vegetation had increased, so we moved between groves of trees and behind brush where we could.

  When we had been walking for a couple hours, we saw bright lights moving closer to us in the distance and all stopped and moved behind some large, flowering bushes. The red and blue lights on top of a fast-moving car shot by us and as we watched it move away, the lights turned off, but it continued to drive in the opposite direction. I let out my breath.

  "Police," Xander said.

  I nodded. "It was going toward Acadia. Do you think Hector called the police?"

  "Maybe," Calder said, standing up and taking my hand.

  About three miles from the edge of the city, Calder's sandal gave out. He made an angry, frustrated sound and threw the broken straps into some brush. He dropped the useless sole onto the ground and turned around, putting both hands on the back of his neck and looked up at the sky.

  "Here," I said, ripping off the hem of my skirt.

  "What the hell are you doing?" Calder asked. He moved around me quickly to block my suddenly bare legs from Xander.

  "I'm making you a shoe," I said. "My legs aren't going to get torn up on the road for being bare, but your foot is."

  Xander chuckled. "She's right, Calder. Sit down. I'll use it to attach the sole to your foot so you can walk. We're so close."

  Calder sat down on the road and let Xander tie my skirt hem around the sole and over his foot and around his ankle. When he stood up and tried it out, he shrugged. "This one feels better than the other one now."

  I smiled. "Well good, I've got enough skirt to go around if we need more."

  "Oh no you don't," Calder said, but a corner of his lips quirked up. He took my hand and we started walking again. Holding hands hadn't been something we could do before that moment. It made the sense of freedom that much sweeter.

  The dirt road turned onto a highway and we walked along it for a while, keeping as far away from the actual road as we could so we were mostly out of sight by drivers passing by. Very large trucks went by with different names written on the sides in bold, bright lettering, their engine noise swelling and then receding as they passed by us in what seemed to be a flash.

  We made it to the edge of the city just as the morning sun crested the horizon, shooting out golden rays as if in welcome. We'd walked all night long, but we had enough energy to grin at each other and grasp hands tightly as our feet stepped onto the first sidewalk I'd walked on since I was a small child. I supposed Xander and Calder had never seen a sidewalk, but I was too tired to ask at the moment.

  After another half hour or so, Calder pointed. "There," he said. I followed his finger to a sign that read, "Holiday Inn" and the word "Hotel" beneath that. I wanted to weep with relief and happiness.

  We stopped and Calder pulled me in to a large doorway and Xander followed, groaning softly as if in pain and leaning back against the wall.

  "Listen," Calder said softly. "I think Xander should go in and try to buy us a room. He knows the most about money and talking to people. Plus, he's in regular clothes and his shoes look better than ours since he didn't walk for as long in them." Calder looked at Xander. "Eden and I will walk inside in twenty minutes or so and you wait somewhere where we can see you. We'll follow you from there."

  Xander shrugged, his face pale. "Sounds like as good a plan as any."

  Calder studied him for a minute. "Let me see your back."

  Xander looked like he thought about protesting, but then turned around. Small dots of blood stained the back of his shirt, making the dark material darker in spots. I sucked in a breath. "It's really not that bad," Xander said. "I think I just need to change the dressings."

  Calder lifted up Xander's shirt and checked under an edge of the cotton dressings. I couldn't see what he was seeing from where I was, but Calder frowned and put the shirt back down. "Okay, we'll get you cleaned up when we get inside." He pushed Xander gently toward the hotel and handed him the canvas bag, I guessed so it looked like he was a traveler. "Make me proud," he said, winking.

  Xander laughed. "Don't I always?" He turned around and walked backward for a second, "Twenty minutes," he said. We nodded and he turned and walked quickly to the front door as we watched.

  I sighed and leaned back against the doorway like Xander had just done.

  "How you doing, Morning Glory?" Calder asked softly, walking over to me and leaning into me as he put his arms around my neck.

  I put my arms around his waist and burrowed into his chest, inhaling his comforting scent. I nodded my head up and down indicating I was fine.

  I turned my head to the side so that my cheek was resting against his shirt. "Do you think he's looking for us?"

  Calder was silent for a few seconds. "I don't know. But it doesn't matter. He won't find us. This is a big, big city, and by tomorrow, we'll just be any ordinary people, in ordinary clothes, doing ordinary things."

  I nodded my head, wondering if I'd ever feel ordinary.

  We leaned against each other quietly and after a few minutes, I closed my eyes and rested against him. After what seemed like just seconds, Calder nudged me.

  "I think it's been about twenty minutes. Let's go."

  I took a deep breath as Calder leaned back and took my hand. "Stay just a little behind me and don’t make eye contact with anyone. But don't look nervous either," he instructed as we started walking.

  A minute later, we were pulling open the doors of the Holiday Inn, me holding Calder's hand and walking slightly behind him. The lobby was mostly deserted, except for an older man using a vacuum on the carpet. He was humming softly as he worked. He didn't even look back at us. There was a sign that said, "Check In" with an arrow pointing around the corner. I let out a breath. We wouldn't even have to walk past anyone.

  Suddenly, Xander walked out of a hallway. "Hey guys," he said, "going up?" He winked and walked toward a sign that said, "Elevators."

  We both sucked in a surprised breath and followed, my heart leaping with hopeful excitement. Calder squeezed my hand. Xander frowne
d at the doors on both sides of the hallway as he looked between them and the card in his hand. I leaned forward and pressed the up arrow. Sometimes I knew something and I couldn't remember how or why—I figured it had to be something I'd learned in the past—but the specific memory or memories of actually doing it were gone.

  A second later, the doors in front of us dinged open and we all peered inside, Xander stepping in first, Calder and I following behind. When we were in, Xander looked at the card in his hand again and said, "ten," under his breath. Then he looked at the buttons on the wall and pressed the number ten.

  The doors closed and the elevator lurched. Calder sucked in a breath and put one palm on each wall, bracing himself. I laughed softly and Xander looked back at him and laughed, too, and then the elevator was rising swiftly. When it stopped and the doors opened, Calder grabbed me and jumped off, stumbling away from the open doors as quickly as possible. I couldn't help grinning. Calder looked at me and shook his head. "That can't be natural."

  Xander snickered. "You can take the stairs tomorrow." He pointed at a sign that said, "Stairway."

  Calder nodded. "I will." He looked back at the sign. "At least everything's labeled in the outside world." I tilted my head at Calder and laughed softly, raising my eyebrows.

  We followed more signs to get to the door with the number on the card Xander carried and then took a few minutes to figure out that we opened the door using the card. It was like some kind of electronic key.

  When we spilled into the dim room and shut the door behind us, we stood there still for a minute, looking around. Were we really here? Had we made it? Joy, swift and complete filled my body and I let out a small incredulous laugh and launched myself into Calder's arms, laughing and crying at the same time. He picked me up and laughed into my neck, squeezing me tight.

  "Well, thanks for nothing. I'm the one who got us in here with my easy charm and winning smile," Xander grumped as he walked to the bed by the far wall and put down the bag we'd all taken turns carrying once Xander could walk.

  Calder set me down and we both walked over to him. I pulled his shirt so we could all hug, although Calder and I were both careful not to touch his back as he laughed and patted our shoulders. "We did it, partners," he said.

  "Was it hard?" Calder asked, "Getting this room, I mean?"

  "Nah," Xander said. "It was easy actually. The kid at the front desk looked like he was falling asleep, probably about to get off shift. I paid in cash and signed a form and that was that."

  "How much did it cost?" I asked.

  "Two hundred forty dollars," Xander said. "I rented it for two nights. I know that's a lot. But now we have time to get in touch with Kristi, get some clothes for you," he nodded at me, "and try to pawn the gold." I nodded, stifling a yawn.

  "First though," Calder said, "we're going to get cleaned up and get some sleep. Xander, go shower and then I'll rebandage your back."

  "Okay, the guy at the front desk said there was an ice machine on every floor. Maybe if I put some ice on it for a little while, it will help with some of the pain now that those magical herbs are wearing off." Xander winked, but then grimaced as he adjusted himself slightly, and then started walking toward the bathroom.

  After he shut the door, I turned to Calder. "Have you guys ever used pain relief? Like Tylenol?"

  Calder looked at me blankly and shook his head. "I know what it is. That's one of the things people who lived outside before Acadia talk about missing, but no, I've never used it."

  I nodded. "We need to get some for Xander."

  Calder sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "That'll have to wait until tomorrow. I think we all need rest more than Xander needs pain relief. Especially since he's done without it all his life."

  I nodded and yawned again. "Okay, go get ice and come right back."

  "Do you think it costs money?"

  I frowned. "I don't know. Take some money just in case."

  Calder nodded and grabbed the bag on Xander's bed and took out some change and put it in his jeans pocket.

  Calder pulled me toward him, kissed my lips, and then turned and walked out the door.

  I sank down onto the other bed and lay back, sighing out at the feel of the soft mattress beneath my back. I started drifting off and forced myself to sit up. If I fell asleep, I'd never wake up. And I wanted to shower and tend to my practically black, dirt-crusted, blistered feet before I got in this clean bed. I was going to sleep in a bed with Calder for the very first time. A thrill shot down my spine, despite my exhausted state. Yes, we were in a hotel and yes, Xander would be sleeping right next to us, but still, I was going to be under blankets with Calder. I felt giddy.

  I should have gone with him to get the ice. It would have kept me awake. I left the hotel room and stepped out into the hallway looking both ways. The floor was quiet, not a person in sight. I turned a corner and saw a sign for "Ice," and breathed out a smile. Everything was labeled in the outside world, thankfully. I followed the sign and when I rounded the corner, I saw Calder standing in front of a big Coke machine. He turned and startled when he saw me and then for some reason, looked embarrassed. "I got some food for us," he said, glancing at the machine just a little ways down the hall.

  I smiled at him and tilted my head, looking back at the Coke machine. "Soda," I said. "Do you want to try one?"

  Calder put his hands in his pockets. "I've had Coca-Cola before," he said. "Ranger station."

  "Ah." I studied him. "Let's get one."

  He shook his head. "No, no, we shouldn't waste our money on this."

  I laughed softly. "Calder, it's only a dollar. Let's splurge. Just this once." I winked at him. He looked so torn.

  "I don't really need it," he said.

  I reached in his front pocket and grabbed a handful of change, raising one brow at him. "We'll share it. By the way, I haven't had a chance to tell you how much I like you in jeans."

  Calder grinned at me as I walked back to the Coke machine and deposited four quarters. The soda can dropped noisily and I bent down and retrieved it, handing it to Calder. He took it and studied it like it was a delicate piece of expensive jewelry. I grinned at him. "I take it you like Coke?"

  "Coke? Is that what it's called?"

  I shrugged. "Yeah, it's like the shortened name. It's what most people call it."

  He nodded, frowning down at the can. "I feel like there are so many things to learn, so many things to catch up on. I feel like I just moved to another planet."

  I let out a breathy laugh. "You kinda did." I was quiet for a second, thinking. "I know how you feel. I know I experienced more up at the main lodge, but I still have a lot to figure out, too." I held out my hand. "We'll figure it out together, okay?"

  Calder smiled gently at me. "Yeah." He grasped my hand, brought it up to his lips, kissed it, and then feathered his lips over it softly. Butterflies fluttered between my ribs.

  "We better get back with that ice," he whispered.

  I nodded. "Okay."

  We turned the corner into the small alcove with another sign for ice. There were a few small containers sitting next to it and Calder picked one up and started filling it with ice. I looked behind us and saw the small machine on the wall, holding Tylenol, Advil, feminine protection products, and, I moved closer, reading the last product, Trojan Condoms. I didn't know what those were and so I squinted at the small package. "Ultra thin contraception," I read.

  Calder came up behind me. "Oh, lucky. Tylenol."

  I laughed softly and then dropped the coins into the machine and retrieved the two small, square packages of pain relief, putting it into my skirt pocket.

  I noticed a supply closet. "Let's see if there's something in there to use for bandages for Xander."

  Calder opened the door and we looked over the shelves of toilet paper and towels.

  "A first aid kit," I said, excitedly, bending down and retrieving it from the lowest shelf. "Perfect. There will be bandages in here."

 
"Good," Calder said. "Let's go."

  As we were walking out, two girls about our age were walking in and I watched as both their eyes lingered on Calder.

  I resisted the urge to stick my foot out and trip them both. Instead, I stuck my empty hand in Calder's back pocket and looked back at them and smiled prettily when I saw they were watching his backside as we walked away.

  Calder chuckled softly.

  I looked down at my ripped skirt, and my dirty feet, barely contained in the broken sandals and sighed. I ran my hand through my tangled hair. "Those girls probably think you rescued me out of some gutter, like some of the women who come to Acadia."

  Calder leaned down and whispered in my ear. "I like my women fresh from the gutter."

  I rolled my eyes and knocked softly on our hotel room door. A few seconds later, Xander swung it open, standing in only a towel wrapped around his waist. "Hot water comes right out of the faucet," he said excitedly.

  I laughed and so did Calder, shutting the door behind him.

  "Here," I said, handing Xander one package of Tylenol. "Take this and Calder will get you bandaged up. I'm going to go take a shower."

  I headed off to the bathroom as Xander moved toward the bed. I cringed when I saw how bad his back still looked. We're far away from there, I thought. We're safe.

  In the bathroom, I stripped out of my clothes, balled them up, and put them in the trash. There was a robe on the back of the door. I'd have to use that until Calder and Xander could get out and buy me something to wear. My clothes were filthy tatters. I dropped my sandals in the garbage, too, and cringed down at my feet. I washed my underwear and bra in the sink with soap and hot water and then hung them to dry.

  I turned the shower to as hot as I could stand it and then stepped under the spray, sighing as the warmth cascaded over me. I washed my hair twice and conditioned it, and then sat down on the floor of the tub and used a washcloth and a bar of soap to clean my feet. Once they were clean, the blisters were easier to see, but they still looked a hundred times better.

  As I sat there on the floor of the shower tub, a wave of emotion suddenly overtook me. I pictured Hailey and the four little boys I had grown to love. I'd never see them again. As happy as I was to be out of Acadia, a feeling of melancholy swept through me when I realized everything I knew and was familiar with was no longer a part of my life.