One Night

  “Listen, Daddy, I’m fully capable of making up my own mind.”

  “Seems to me you made it up the first time you went to bed with this young man.”

  “Mr. Jamison,” Kyle said in a strong, even voice, “Carrie and I respect your opinion, but whether or not we marry is based on several factors, none of which involve you.”

  After having stood up to her father alone most of her life, it was a relief to Carrie to have someone on her side. Kyle surprised her. She would have thought this was a golden opportunity for him to pressure her into getting married, but he hadn’t. She loved him so much in that minute it was all she could do not to hurl her arms around his neck and thank him.

  Instead she looked calmly at her parents and said, “Mom and Dad, I appreciate your concern and I promise you that Kyle and I will let you know what we plan to do as soon as we’ve made that decision ourselves.”

  “Seems to me you’re the one causing the problem,” her father said. “Kyle looks like a fine young man. If you’re willing to sleep with him, then by all that’s right you should be willing to marry him.”

  “That’s our business, Daddy.”

  “It might be best to leave them be,” Patsy said, looking to her husband of twenty-nine years.

  “Young people these days don’t respect their elders the way they once did,” Michael grumbled. “Where’d we go wrong with Carrie? She was such a sweet baby. She never caused us a lick of trouble until she turned fourteen.”

  “Yes, dear.”

  “My only hope is that Carrie will give birth to a daughter. Then maybe someday she’ll know what it’s like to have your guts ripped out by learning your baby girl’s about to have a baby of her own without a husband. Trust me, you love your children so damn much you’re willing to do anything to make sure they’re happy.”

  “I’m happy, Daddy,” Carrie felt obliged to tell her father. “Really happy.”

  “Are you pleased to be having a baby out of wedlock?”

  “I’m excited about this child,” she said honestly. She didn’t feel now was the time to admit how mixed her feelings had been in the beginning or how she’d struggled with her situation.

  “I think we should go back home, Michael,” Patsy suggested softly. “We’ve done enough damage here.”

  “I’m not leaving until my little girl’s future is settled.”

  “To your satisfaction,” Carrie inserted. It was the same argument: different chapter, identical verse. Her father felt he knew what was best for her and was intent on forcing her to comply with his vision for her future. Carrie had been rebelling against his domineering ways since she was a teenager. She’d believed that, as an adult, she’d escaped, but apparently not.

  “You’re going to have a baby,” Michael blared, as if she would see the light if he said it loudly enough. “A baby needs a father.”

  Carrie half expected Kyle to leap in now and side with her dad. Kyle had been giving her virtually the same argument.

  “Carrie knows what she’s doing,” Kyle said on her behalf.

  “How long have you known my daughter?” her father wanted to know.

  “Long enough,” Kyle answered calmly. He looked at his watch and then pointedly opened the door. “One of us will be in touch with you soon.”

  “I could grow to like this young man,” Michael said to his wife, but Carrie had the distinct impression he was announcing this for her benefit as well.

  What father wouldn’t like Kyle? she wondered. He’d make the ideal husband. Ideal son-in-law. He was intelligent, dedicated, generous. Perfect husband material even if she wasn’t carrying his child.

  “I believe an apology to the manager might smooth the waters,” Patsy said on her way out of Carrie’s office. “We really must talk about the way you handle these matters, dear. Rushing in here the way you did! Why, we’re lucky someone didn’t phone for a SWAT team.”

  “Don’t be ridiculous. I’m harmless.”

  “Michael, really.”

  Without further comment, Kyle bid them both a safe trip home and returned to the newsroom for his on-the-hour broadcast. Carrie admired his restraint. She escorted her parents down a narrow hallway past the transmitter room and the control room. Following Kyle’s example, she didn’t berate her father, although heaven knew he deserved it.

  “I’d like to speak to you when you’re finished,” Clyde said, sticking his head out of his office as she passed by.

  Her father stepped forward and offered Clyde his hand. “The wife says I made an ass of myself and owe you an apology.”

  “My husband tends to get carried away when it comes to his daughter’s welfare,” Patsy Jamison added.

  Clyde shook her father’s hand and made some remark that Carrie couldn’t quite make out, but the fact he’d asked to speak to her didn’t bode well. He had every right to be upset, although she had no control over her father’s behavior.

  After she’d returned from seeing her parents out, Carrie returned to Clyde’s office and knocked briskly against his solid wood door. She might as well get this over with as quickly as possible.

  “You wanted to see me?” she asked, after he called for her to come inside.

  “Yes,” he said, reaching for a cigar.

  So it was going to be one of those talks. The only time Carrie ever saw an unlit cigar in Clyde’s mouth was when he faced an unpleasant task—like firing someone.

  He motioned toward the chair on the other side of the desk. Its straight back reminded her of an electric chair she’d once seen in an article about capital punishment. She sat on the edge of the cushion, ready to spring upward the instant she was dismissed.

  “I’ve already fired you once this year,” he said, his voice gravelly and deep.

  “Are you going to do it a second time?” Carrie asked, thinking it would be better to face the idea head on. She wasn’t sure what she’d do, especially now. There were other jobs, other radio stations, other means of supporting herself and her child, if it came to that. Losing the morning slot at KUTE wouldn’t be the end of the world, but it would surely feel like it.

  “You’re job’s secure for now,” Clyde surprised her by saying.

  Carrie was so relieved her shoulders involuntarily slumped forward.

  “I’m sorry about what happened with my parents.” She wanted to clear the air about the scene as much as possible. Generally her father didn’t behave like a bull moose with strangers.

  “I’m not the least bit sorry your parents stopped by,” Clyde said smoothly, rolling the cigar to the corner of his mouth. “It explains a good deal, especially your…condition.”

  “It does?” After frequent bouts of morning sickness, she didn’t think the news of her pregnancy came as a surprise to anyone on the station staff. True, she wasn’t thrilled to have her father announce it the way he had, but that couldn’t be helped.

  “I thought everything was going pretty well between you and Kyle. Not that well, mind you, but there’s been a definite improvement.”

  “I’m in love with Kyle.” Funny, she had no problem opening her heart to her employer, but she hadn’t once told her parents how she felt. It made a weird sort of sense. If either her mother or father knew how she felt, they’d use it against her. Clyde wouldn’t.

  “I believe Kyle feels the same way about you,” Clyde said. “That’s why it’s difficult to explain this.” He handed her a sheet of paper. Carrie read the single-spaced letter twice, unable to believe what was before her very eyes.

  “This is Kyle’s two-week notice,” she said, in a voice that was reed thin. She felt as if she’d had the wind knocked out of her and was unable to get her breath back.

  “So this is as much of a surprise to you as it is to me?”

  “Yes. I had no idea,” she said when she could. “Did he tell you where he’s headed?”

  “No. I got the impression he didn’t know himself. My feeling is that it isn’t anywhere near here.”

  “I se
e.”

  “You don’t know what this is all about, then?”

  She shook her head. “I don’t have a clue.”

  Kyle was turning his back and walking out on her. After all the times he’d said he cared for her and wanted to marry her and give their baby his name.

  Now she knew the truth.

  Despite his words to the contrary, Kyle was doing exactly what his father had done to his mother: walking out.

  Then again, she might be leaping to conclusions. She’d been guilty of that in the past. “I’ll talk to him,” she announced, knowing without Clyde’s having to say it that this was what he wanted her to do.

  “KUTE doesn’t want to lose Kyle.”

  “You were willing enough to let us both go not so long ago,” she reminded him.

  “Naw,” Clyde said with a cocky grin. “That was just a ploy to smooth the waters between you two—and it worked. Far better than anyone ever imagined, I might add. What you young people failed to recognize is that there’s often a thin line between love and hate.”

  “In other words, you set us up.”

  “Something like that. I figured you’d end up either passionately in love or murdering each other. My best guess was that you’d fall in love, and I was right.”

  So he’d thrown them together and then stood back to watch the fireworks, like a display on the Fourth of July.

  “Talk to him, Carrie. See if you can find out what’s bugging him. If anyone can convince Kyle to stay on at the station, it’s you.”

  Carrie wasn’t convinced this was true. She had every reason to believe he’d given notice in an effort to get away from her. What hurt her so terribly was that he’d gone behind her back, leaving her to learn what he’d done from Clyde.

  She left Clyde’s office, and moved down the hallway past the control room to the enclosed cubicle that served as the newsroom. Kyle was reading the news wire. He took stories that came from the Associated Press and rewrote them according to the amount of interest there would be for each specific story in their area.

  “You busy?” she asked.

  “Not particularly,” he said absently.

  Carrie stepped inside and closed the door. When it clicked into place, Kyle glanced up, seemingly surprised. She offered him a shaky smile that cost her a good deal, in light of what she’d just learned.

  “I’m sorry about the scene with my parents.”

  “No problem.” He turned back to the news wire. “I see what you mean about your father.”

  “He didn’t mean to come off like such a jerk. He’s worried about me, is all.”

  “So he said.”

  “You did everything right. He thinks you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You’re great, exactly the type of son-in-law he’s wished for all these years. He thinks you’re just the kind of man I need to whip me into shape.” She made a fist and punched the air with it. “By golly, you’ve already proved yourself. One look at you, and Daddy knew you’d keep me barefoot and pregnant for years to come.”

  Kyle glanced her way as if he wasn’t sure he should be amused or angry. “I sincerely doubt that.”

  “But you are,” she said sarcastically, then regretted the childish display of emotion. “I just finished talking to Clyde.”

  She had his full attention now. The news wire might be typing out the late-breaking story of World War III and he wouldn’t notice. His eyes all but drilled holes into her.

  “He showed me your letter,” she said.

  His attention returned to the news wire. “So you know?”

  “Yeah, I know. When did you plan to break the news? Or did you intend to tell me at all?”

  “I doubt that I could have kept it a secret.”

  “Probably not,” she agreed with a certain lack of graciousness. “When did you decide to leave the station?” Despite his proposal, she guessed it had happened when he’d had time to consider the consequences of their one fateful night.

  He didn’t have any reason to feel responsible. She’d absolved him from that in the beginning. As he’d so eloquently put it, she’d been the one to come to his room.

  She guessed he was testing her now to see if she was serious or not. She’d meant every word earlier, when she’d said it. Now it felt wrong. She bit back the words that would force him to face up to his obligation to her and their baby.

  “I made my decision this morning,” Kyle answered her.

  “Before or after meeting my father?” she asked with a shaky laugh.

  The hint of a smile touched his lips. “Before.”

  “Do…you have another job waiting for you?”

  “Not yet.”

  “I hear KAKY radio has need of a newsman.” She knew nothing of the sort but was looking for his reaction.

  “Thanks.”

  “Will you apply?” she pressed.

  “Probably not.”

  “Why? You’d be a shoo-in, especially with a letter of recommendation from Clyde.”

  Kyle walked around her and returned to his desk. “I was planning to look for work out of state. If you must know, I’ve been considering heading for the South Pacific. I’ve always had a yen to visit Australia and New Zealand.”

  “Oh.” Carrie felt as if a giant football player had tackled her. It sounded as if Kyle wanted to be as far away from her as he could get.

  “In other words, you’re walking out on me,” she said, struggling not to come off as accusatory.

  “Not really.”

  “Not really,” she echoed, with a soft hysterical laugh. “It seems to me you’re following in your father’s footsteps. From what you told me, he walked out on your mother. Now you’re doing the same thing to me.”

  “No, Carrie, I’m not.” Just the way he spoke told her how angry he was. “I’m giving you exactly what you asked for. Space and time.”

  “Fifteen thousand miles is a bit more space than I need.”

  “I was planning to visit once the baby’s born.” He made a few notations on an article he’d pulled off the wire.

  “Isn’t this all rather sudden?” She thought about their conversation that morning. He’d seemed more relaxed, and now she understood the reason. He was abandoning her, something she would have sworn he’d never do. She noticed that he hadn’t mentioned his plans to her father. Not that she particularly blamed him.

  “I must say you put on a wonderful performance for my parents. I guess I should thank you for that.”

  He tossed her a surly look. “Did it ever occur to you to inquire why I’m uprooting my life and moving myself bodily as far as I can from you and our child?”

  “No,” she said in a tight, small voice.

  “Because I’ve lost the ability to think clearly any longer.”

  His reason hit Carrie hard. “I don’t want you to leave Kansas City. I need you…more now than ever.” Her pride came crashing at her feet. Her voice trembled, but she managed to sound confident and secure by the time she finished.

  “You want to make a lapdog out of me.”

  “That’s not true.”

  “I’m not willing to follow you around while you decide if you’ll deign to marry me or not. I’m a man, Carrie, and although I don’t have much pride anymore when it comes to you and our baby, I have enough to protect what little ego I have left.”

  “But—”

  “You’ve already given me a valid list of reasons why you won’t marry me,” he said, cutting her off. “I respect those reasons. I respect your freedom of choice. That’s all fine and dandy, but I have needs too. It all boils down to one thing.”

  “What’s that?” she asked in an incredibly fragile voice.

  “I couldn’t bear to watch my child grow in your womb week by week and feel helpless. It’s bad enough having you push me out of your life this way.”

  “I’m not pushing you out of my life,” she insisted, ready to become involved in a lengthy battle of words, but apparently he didn’t want that because
he ignored her comment.

  “I’m respecting your wishes. All I ask is that you respect mine.”

  “But—” She bit her tongue to keep from saying anything more.

  “I’m trying the best I can to do what’s right for you, for me, and for our baby. If you change your mind about marrying me, let me know.”

  “So that’s what this is all about,” she said incredulously. It was all beginning to make sense. Kyle was blackmailing her into caving in to his wishes. Since he hadn’t been able to convince her to marry him, this must be Plan B.

  It was as she’d always suspected. Kyle was just like her father, only far more subtle.

  “I’m going to miss you” she said, as if his leaving were of little concern to her. “I hope you’ll keep in touch.”

  “I will.”

  “A postcard now and again from the outback would certainly be interesting.”

  Kyle walked over to the news desk and Carrie slipped out of the office. She was shaky and uncertain. Returning to her own office, she sat in the chair and pressed her forehead against the heel of her hands.

  “How’d it go?” Clyde asked, sticking his head in the door.

  She didn’t look up. “Not good. He’s thinking about traveling to the South Pacific.”

  “That’s a bit drastic, isn’t it?”

  Carrie smiled sadly. “My thoughts exactly.”

  “Did he give you any indication why?”

  “Yes,” she whispered, turning to face her employer. “He says it’s because he can’t think clearly any longer.”

  15

  The phone was ringing when Kyle walked into the house that night. He stared at it for four rings before answering. “Hello.”

  “Kyle, something’s wrong. My crystals have been hot all day. Tell me what’s happening with you so I can help.”

  He should have known it would be his mother. She had a knack for sensing when he was at a low point and then going all motherly on him. He’d practically raised Lillian, and to have her suddenly decide to be the parent was seldom any comfort.

  “Tell me,” Lillian insisted.

  “Have you ever considered that your crystals could be wrong?” Kyle asked, not wanting to get into a long-drawn-out discussion. Not tonight. He had far more important matters on his mind.