Sincerely, Carter

  I started to turn around, started to thank him, but he gripped my hips and held me still. Gently tracing the line above the clasp of my bra, he looped his fingers underneath the clasp and tore it free.

  “Do you need help getting out of anything else?” he whispered.

  I shook my head, completely turned on.

  With my back still to his front, he hooked his fingers under the straps of my dress and pushed them down my shoulders—pushing the fabric down my arms, down my waist, down my legs.

  He pressed his mouth against the back of my neck as he took off my bra, and then he whispered into my ear. “Are you sure you don’t need help with these?” He tugged at my panties.

  “I’m sure…”

  “Okay.” He kissed the back of my neck again and left the room.

  I was pretty sure I stood there for twenty minutes, not moving, not blinking, and only trying to figure out what the hell that was.

  When I finally came to my senses, I stepped inside the shower and stood directly under the streams. Shaking my head again and again, I kept wondering if it was a dream. Wondering why I was reacting so strongly to him all of a sudden.

  He’s like a brother to me…I shouldn’t be thinking about him like this at all…

  When my skin was red and raw, I turned off the water and stepped out, noticing he’d placed a white robe across the vanity for me.

  I dried off and put it on, heading back to the bedroom so I could go and pass out.

  Carter looked up from his desk as soon as I entered the room. “Ready to go to bed?”

  “Yes, but um…You’re not…” My heart still hadn’t returned to its normal rhythm. “You’re not going to join me, are you?”

  “No…” A slow smile spread across his lips as he stood up. “Not unless you want me to.”

  “Are you implying sex right now?”

  “Are you?”

  My eyes widened, and he laughed.

  He picked me up and tossed me onto the bed, fluffing the pillows and pulling the covers over me. He pulled out a few bottles of water from his mini fridge and set them on the nightstand next to me.

  “I’ll come back and check on you in the morning,” he said. “Do you need anything else?”

  “Um…”

  “Um?” He raised his eyebrow. “You’re starting to say that word a lot…”

  “I…” I felt a sudden oncoming of sleep. “I think you’re sexy as fuck, and if you weren’t my best friend, and this wasn’t a dream, I’d totally fuck you right now… ”

  “Excuse me?”

  Everything went black.

  Track 9. Tell Me Why (3:13)

  What the hell was that?

  I couldn’t get the last thing Arizona said out of my mind, nor could I stop picturing the way her mouth and body felt against mine at the party yesterday. That meant a lot considering the fact that I was pissed about two major things right now…

  Sighing, I wiped the last of Tina’s vomit out of my car and clicked the text she’d just sent me:

  I didn’t know I was so drunk…Sorry I messed up your car…I was serious about wanting to do anal sex first though…Call me when you see this!

  Ugh. I put my phone back in my pocket, returning back to thoughts of last night.

  The second I’d seen Arizona in that red dress, I couldn’t focus on anything else. Not even Tina, and I’d tried. Hard.

  I’d done my best to seem interested in Tina’s bland and oversexed conversation, to act intrigued when she not-so-subtly showed me the color of the thong she was wearing, but no matter how many times she whispered how badly she wanted to ride me later, I could only think about Arizona and how badly I wanted to be with her.

  What’s more, was when the two of us danced together at the end of the night, it didn’t feel as playful and innocent as it normally did. And I knew she could feel the difference, too; she’d never blushed around me before, and she definitely never touched me the way she did either.

  I’d checked on her a few times after she’d gone to sleep in my room and when I noticed that she’d rolled off the bed and onto the floor, I made her wake up. I held a wet towel over her head as she quietly cursed at me, made her drink a bottle of water with aspirin, and then I waited until she fell asleep again. I was honestly beyond tempted to spend the rest of the night with her to make sure she remained okay, but Tina had found me and was begging me to take her home so we could have sex.

  Maybe her vomiting all over my car was a good thing…

  Still thinking, I walked down my driveway and unlocked the door to my backyard—coming face to face with the second reason I was pissed.

  Red cups and beer bottles were everywhere, and quite a few people had passed out on the Slip N Slide’s yellow tarp. The Jell-O pool was overturned, white T-shirts were hanging from a makeshift clothing line, and there were numerous partiers who’d made pillows out of some of my appliances.

  I headed inside, looking for Josh so I could kill him.

  “Hey, what’s up?” He smiled as I walked into the kitchen, holding up a frying pan.

  “Do you see all those red cups and beer bottles in my yard?” I looked around my house. “On the floor in here, too?”

  “Don’t worry about any that,” he said. “Last semester’s newest class will be over in an hour to clean up everything. You want eggs?”

  “No.” I grabbed an orange juice from the fridge. “Will the furniture be put back today as well?”

  “Yep.” He flipped his eggs over. “Everything should be put back in order no later than three o’clock today…Maybe after you see how well everything is put back together, we can set up another business meeting about hosting an ‘Epic: Part Two’ party?”

  I gave him a blank stare, and he laughed.

  “I’m kidding, I’m kidding. I saw you leaving the party with Tina around three. How did that go?”

  “It didn’t,” I said. “She vomited in my car as soon as we hit the highway.”

  “Oh. Well, let me guess. You helped her clean up and stuff when you got to her place?”

  “Of course I did.” I rolled my eyes. “I’m not as big of an asshole as you. How was your night?”

  “Eh. I’ve had way better pussy, but it was still good.”

  “Do I even want to know who the unlucky victim was?”

  “No, not unless you promise you won’t judge me.”

  “I will.” I laughed and stepped back. “Whatever extra stuff you put in the Jell-O shots this time, you should seriously reconsider that next time you want to throw an ‘epic’ party.”

  “Epic with a capital E, my friend.” He smiled. “And why would I reconsider anything? Because one person got sick?”

  “Because everyone got sick.” I waved around the room. “Or do you not notice the twenty extra roommates we have this morning?”

  “Noted. If you change your mind about another party, don’t forget that I’ll be willing to show you my worthiness around three today.”

  I didn’t bother responding. I walked down the hallway and into my room, noticing that Ari was struggling to sit up.

  “Stop.” I placed a pillow behind her back and helped her.

  “Thanks…” She looked up at me. “Can I ask you something?”

  “Ask away.”

  “Did we really kiss each other last night or was that a nightmare?”

  “Yes, we really kissed each other last night,” I said. “But even if we hadn’t, it would be more of a wet dream for you, not a nightmare.”

  “Forget I ever asked…” She tried to roll over, but I held her still.

  “Do you remember any of what happened last night?”

  “What do you mean any of what happened?” She looked terrified. “We did more than just kiss?”

  “No…” I said, not sure how to feel about her not remembering. “Do you want to stay here for the rest of the day, or do you want me to take you home?”

  “I honestly can’t feel my legs right now…” She croake
d as she pushed her phone toward me. “Can you text Chris and ask him if we can skip tonight and go out tomorrow? I’m too hungover…”

  “Being hungover means you’re incapable of texting?”

  “I’ve texted your girlfriends before, and I didn’t complain…” She narrowed her eyes at me, handing me her phone.

  I tapped her message box and noticed that Chris had sent her a shit ton of messages since last night. “Are you sure this guy isn’t the male version of Emily? He’s texted you damn near every hour on the hour since yesterday. You should probably read his messages first.”

  She scooted to the edge of the bed, smiling and looking up at me. “Read them for me.”

  “You owe me a hungover Saturday at your place, with breakfast. “

  “Done deal.”

  I clicked the first one.

  Can’t wait to see you again, baby…

  “You’ve known each other less than two weeks and he’s already calling you baby?”

  “Just read them, without your unwanted commentary. Thanks.”

  I rolled my eyes and clicked the next one.

  You’re hot as shit, babe.

  She smiled.

  You’re beautiful as shit, babe.

  She smiled again.

  I can’t wait to see your—

  I stopped. “I’m not reading the rest of this shit, Ari.”

  “Please…”

  I groaned.

  I can’t wait to see your perfect ass tits and your warm ass mouth wrapped around my rock-hard cock…Can’t wait to devour your pussy…

  Blushing, she snatched the phone away from me. “I didn’t realize there were sext messages…Those are private.”

  “That’s the type of shit that turns you on, Ari? Private message about warm ass mouths wrapped around rock-hard cocks?”

  “It’s called dirty talk.”

  “It’s called an attempt at dirty talk…That’s not what that is at all.”

  “It’s exactly what it is.” She narrowed her eyes at me, looking just as beautiful as she had last night. “Maybe if you’d done it with someone out of your plethora of girlfriends, your relationships would’ve lasted a whole lot longer.”

  I stared at her, noticing how she was biting her lip, how I was definitely going to have to find a way to stay the hell away from her for a while until I figured out why she was suddenly affecting me.

  “Are you just going to stare at me?” she asked. “No smart ass rebuttals? No comeback puns?”

  “No…”

  “Well, that’s shocking.” She bit her lip again, and to prevent myself from pulling her up and biting it too, I grabbed a towel from the edge of the bed. “I’m going to take a shower. I’ll talk to you when you’re not talking about warm ass mouths and cocks…”

  Track 10. The Best Day (3:55)

  I remembered everything about last night. Every. Goddamn. Thing.

  The way his lips felt against mine, the way he looked at me at the party, the way he rendered me utterly speechless when he undressed me in the bathroom. I’d never been kissed the way he kissed me, never felt it in every vein of my being and been left yearning for more. Much more.

  Still, a part of me wanted to remain in denial, so I’d done my best to keep thoughts of him at bay today.

  I looked at myself in a full length mirror, debating whether I should wear my hair up or down. My rescheduled date with Chris was tonight and regardless of the fact that I could still feel Carter’s lips on mine, I needed to get back to reality. The one where we were just friends and had a shared drunken moment.

  My phone buzzed as I decided to go with an up-do. Carter.

  Has your pussy been devoured yet?

  Laughing, I pulled my hair into a bun before texting back:

  Not yet…Give it a couple of hours.

  A couple of hours for him to start or a couple of hours for him to finish?

  Both….I’m sure he’ll be down there a very long time. Something tells me you know nothing about giving and are all about receiving.

  Something tells me that you don’t know me as well as you should.

  Before I could even begin to comprehend what he meant by that, he sent me another text:

  Have fun on your date tonight. Let me know how it goes later.

  Thanks…I will.

  He sent me a colorful picture of a skeleton lying in bed with the words “I’ll be waiting” and I laughed, now realizing that despite the amazing kiss we’d shared, and the outlandish sexual text he’d just sent, it didn’t mean anything to either of us. We were just friends.

  Just friends…Just friends…

  I put on another coat of pink lipstick, and heard a soft knock on my door. “Yes?”

  “Arizona?” My roommate, Heather, knocked once more.

  “Yeah?”

  “You got a minute?”

  “Sure, come in.” I leaned close to the mirror and plucked an errant hair from my eyebrow.

  She stepped inside, smiling at me through the glass and I smiled back. When I’d first moved off campus and into our shared house, I’d thought that she and the rest of the girls would become some of my closest friends, but that never came to be. They were all majoring in medical studies, and since their schedules were practically the same, they tended to keep to themselves for the most part. With the exception of our early morning conversations around the coffee maker on the weekends, we always saw each other in passing.

  “Me and the girls of the house wanted to give you this,” she said, handing me a pink gift box. “It’s a farewell present since you’re the only one who’s not staying in town after the summer.”

  “But I’m not going anywhere for another two months…”

  “Yeah, but everyone is always all over the place now that we’re working our residencies, and we can never all be here at the same time, so I didn’t want to forget.” She pulled a tiny blue box from her back pocket. “This one is for Carter.”

  “Why does Carter get a gift? He’s not a roommate.”

  “No, but we see him just as much as we see you.” She shrugged. “My boyfriend is downstairs now. I just wanted to give you that before we start watching our movie.”

  “Thank you.” I was truly flattered. “I really appreciate this.”

  “You’re welcome.” She gave me a quick hug and left as quickly as she had come in.

  I untied the box’s bow and started to unwrap the gift, but Chris called me as I was tearing the first flap.

  “Hello?” I answered.

  “Are you ready or do you still need a little time?”

  “I’m ready.”

  “In that case, I’m at your door.”

  “Be right down.” I grabbed my clutch and headed downstairs, checking myself in the hallway mirror one last time.

  I opened the door and saw Chris standing there with a huge bouquet of yellow flowers.

  “You look beautiful…” He pulled me close for a kiss, gently slipping his tongue against mine and whispering against my mouth; I only felt a small tingle. Nothing groundbreaking.

  Slipping his arm around my waist, he led me to his car and held the door open—smiling as I slipped inside.

  “I never took you for a guy who likes pop music,” I said as he turned on the radio.

  “I don’t…I just remembered that you do, and that I’m supposed to do whatever’s necessary to get you to sleep with me later.”

  I laughed at his dry humor and hummed along to the music as he drove. Tonight was in fact our third date, and even though he was joking, I knew the three-date-sex rule was playing in his mind.

  We pulled up to the pier half an hour later and walked hand in hand to Emilia’s, an Italian restaurant that everyone at the beach loved. Since he’d made a reservation, we were immediately seated near the window, and the waiter came over with a complimentary house wine and asked to take our orders.

  As he was writing down what I wanted, I spotted Carter sitting at a corner table. With Tina. He was dress
ed in a white shirt that was unbuttoned at the top with black slacks, and she was wearing a dark green dress that left little to the imagination.

  Although Carter looked somewhat detached, he was holding her hand on top of the table.

  I took out my phone and shot him a quick text.

  You decided to try the relationship thing with Tina instead of just sex? When did that happen?

  It didn’t. What would ever make you think that?

  The fact that you’re holding hands at Emilia’s and she’s wearing a dress that looks like she wants to give you the ride of your life later tonight…

  You really need to get better at sexting…

  He tossed back a shot as he looked around the room until he found me. His lips slightly parted as his eyes met mine, and it looked like he was about to get up and walk over, but he stayed back and texted me instead.

  She called and said she wanted to go out to dinner...I didn’t have anything else to do so I agreed…And if her dress says she wants to give me the ride of her life tonight, what the hell does yours say?

  It says, ‘I know you want me right here, right now…’

  More like, ‘I want to be fucked right here, right now…

  I laughed and looked up to see him smiling at me.

  “What’s so funny?” Chris asked.

  “Nothing, just a text from a friend.” I put my phone away and gave him my attention. “Thank you for being nice enough to reschedule our date for tonight.”

  “Nice enough? It wasn’t that big of a deal. I would’ve waited until next week if you wanted.” He picked up my hand and held it. “Don’t take this the crazy way or anything, but I really like you. There’s something about you I can’t quite put my finger on, but I like you a lot.”

  “Is this the part where you’re going to tell me that I complete you?”

  “It is.” He laughed, letting my hand go. “How did you know?”

  “Instincts.” I sipped my wine and the two of us steered the conversation toward the simple and safe things: Plans after college, the bullshit of grad school programs, and the dwindling days of summer.