Ready for Romance
Jessica declined. She wasn’t keen on being one of the first ones on the floor. “I think I’d prefer to sit out a few of the numbers, if you don’t mind.”
“Nonsense. I won’t take no for an answer.” Evan all but pulled her out of her chair. He led her onto the dance floor, and although the number was fast, he brought her into his arms and held her close.
“Evan,” she hissed, acutely aware of the impression they were creating. It looked as if they were madly in love and couldn’t bear to be separated.
“Shh,” he whispered close to her ear.
“What’s wrong with you?”
“Me?” he asked, then threw back his head and laughed as if she’d said something uproariously funny.
“Nothing. I’m having a good time, that’s all.”
“At my expense,” she told him in an angry whisper. “Soon everyone will be talking about us.”
“Let them.”
“Something is very wrong,” Jessica insisted.
He laughed again. “Not exactly, but soon everything should be just right.”
Jessica hadn’t a clue what he meant, but she wasn’t going to continue with this farce any longer than necessary. As soon as the number finished, she broke away from him and returned to their table.
“Jessica’s knee is bothering her,” Evan explained, and before she realized what was happening, Evan had asked Nadine to dance and the pair stood and left the table. Damian looked unnerved.
“Well,” Jessica said dryly, “I guess you can’t keep a good man down.”
Damian frowned darkly. “He might have asked someone other than my date.” His hand closed around his water glass, and he seemed intent on studying the dancing couples. Intent on not making conversation with her, Jessica thought, which was fine. Just fine. Everything had already been said as far as she could see, and apparently Damian felt the same way.
“How’s your knee?” Damian asked unexpectedly.
“It’s okay. Evan was using it as an excuse to dance with Nadine.”
The music circled them in a warm halo of melody. Soon Jessica was tapping her foot, wishing she hadn’t been so quick to insist she leave the dance floor.
“Come on,” Damian said with a decided lack of enthusiasm. He stood and offered her his hand.
Stunned, Jessica looked up at him.
“There’s nothing worse than sitting with a woman who obviously wants to dance.”
“I…” She intended to tell him there was nothing worse than dancing with someone who obviously didn’t want to be her partner. But before she could speak, he’d taken her hand. He was muttering something under his breath, which she couldn’t quite make out. She did hear Evan’s name, and she guessed he wasn’t pleased with his brother.
Jessica wanted to kick Evan for leaving her alone with Damian. The orchestra had been playing fast-paced songs, but when Damian and Jessica moved onto the floor, the band began a slow dreamy number. The lights lowered and Jessica groaned inwardly.
“Let’s sit this one out,” she suggested.
“Not on your life,” Damian said, easing her into his arms. She didn’t understand why he felt obliged to dance with her. He held her stiffly in his arms as though afraid to bring her close. His back was rigid and he stared straight ahead.
“Relax,” he whispered impatiently. “I won’t bite.”
“Me?” she said. “I might as well be waltzing with a mannequin.”
“Okay, let’s both make an effort.”
Jessica hadn’t realized she was so tense. Determined to do as he suggested, she closed her eyes and released a slow sigh. She felt the tension ease from Damian, and when she opened her eyes he’d brought her closer, close enough for her to rest her temple against the side of his jaw. The solace she found, as their bodies swayed gently to the rhythm, was worth every minute she’d waited to feel his arms around her.
This was where she belonged, Jessica mused sadly, where she’d always belonged. Surely Damian felt it too. Why else would he be holding her as if she was the most precious thing in his world? Why else would his lips be moving against her hair as if he longed to kiss her.
Neither spoke, she realized, because they feared words would destroy the moment. She clung to him even when the music stopped, not wanting this blissful time to end.
“We should get back to the table,” Damian said, and the reluctance she heard in his voice gave her hope.
“I don’t see Evan or Nadine. Do you want to dance one more number?” she asked.
He didn’t answer her for a long moment, and then said gruffly, “Yes.”
“I do, too.”
“Jessica, listen…”
She chanced raising her face and looking at him, her eyes filled with a longing so great she couldn’t hide it. Pressing her finger over his mouth, she smiled. “Please, Damian, not now.”
He briefly closed his eyes, sighed and nodded.
Jessica lost track of time. She knew they danced far longer than they should have, for more numbers than she could count. Every once in a while she glanced at their table, but neither Nadine or Evan were in sight.
It wasn’t until the music sped up again, that he revealed any signs of regret. She knew something was wrong the minute he eased her from his arms. His face hardened. She looked up at him and blinked, not understanding.
“I’ll have my brother’s hide for this,” Damian muttered.
“For what?” she asked softly.
A muscle in his jaw jerked as he reined in his temper, but that was the only answer she got.
They left the dance floor and sat like strangers at the table. Jessica couldn’t bear it any longer. She stood, excused herself and moved from table to table to greet several old family friends. She returned only when she saw that Evan had joined his brother. Nadine was nowhere in sight. The two brothers seemed to be having a rapid intense exchange of words, but when she approached, Damian clamped his mouth closed and looked the other way.
“I’ve neglected you,” Evan said contritely, claiming her hand between both of his. “I’m sorry, Jessica. Can you forgive me?”
“Of course.” What else could she do? Demand that he immediately take her home? That would have been silly. Especially as she wasn’t interested in him as anything other than a friend. Besides, his neglect had given her all that time with Damian.
A breathless and laughing Nadine returned to the table a few moments later, and the four of them ordered drinks. The waitress had just brought their order when Walter and Lois Dryden approached their table.
“I hope you four are enjoying yourselves.”
Evan said that they certainly had been.
Lois smiled benevolently down on Jessica, then gently placed her hands on Jessica’s shoulders, leaning forward so that their heads were close together. “We owe you so much,” she said, kissing her cheek.
“Nonsense.” The words embarrassed her.
“It’s true. Tell her, Walter,” Lois insisted. “We were about to despair over what was happening with Evan, and that all changed the minute you started working for the firm.”
“Mother…” Evan didn’t seem to appreciate this, either.
“It’s true. You have no idea how pleased Joyce and I are that the two of you are seeing so much of each other,” Lois continued.
“I have to agree with your mother,” Walter said in his deep, vibrant voice. “You’re a good man, Evan, with a bright future. It was a damn shame to watch you waste your life over a woman you couldn’t have. It’s much better now that you’re seeing Jessica.”
A stilted uncomfortable silence followed his father’s praise. Within a few minutes of the elder Drydens’ visit to their table, Damian made an excuse, and he and Nadine got up and left. After that, Evan didn’t seem too keen to stay, either. As for Jessica, she was more than happy to get home. Enough was enough.
SHE LAY AWAKE most of the night thinking, and by daybreak, she’d made her decision. With purpose driving her steps, Jessica walked
into the office the next morning, her eyes burning from lack of sleep.
“I need to see Mr. Dryden for a moment,” she told Damian’s secretary.
The woman, doubtless noting the determination in Jessica’s voice, reached instantly for the intercom and announced her.
Jessica strode into Damian’s office and stood before him. He was sitting behind his desk reading a file. He glanced up, his expression, as always, inscrutable. “What can I do for you, Jessica?”
Her heart pounding, she said flatly, “I’m resigning from my position with this firm, effective immediately.” It was an impulsive thing to do, Jessica realized, considering how difficult it was these days to find a job. But her sanity was more important. She’d do temporary work if she had to. Or work in another field.
If Damian was surprised by her announcement, he didn’t reveal it. He leaned back in his chair, calm and composed. “This is rather sudden, isn’t it?”
“Yes…but it’s necessary.” She avoided eye contact by studying the painting on the wall behind him. It was a seascape with the ocean crashing against the jagged edge of a protruding rock. A bird was perched on the uppermost point of the rock, undisturbed by the raging sea. Jessica wished she could be more like that bird.
“Does Evan know?”
“Not yet,” she replied. “Since you were the one to hire me, I felt obligated to tell you first.”
He paused as if gathering his thoughts. “If you could work out your two-week notice, I’d appreciate it.”
Jessica wasn’t sure what she’d expected. Nothing, she’d told herself, but she realized now that wasn’t true. In the deepest part of her, she was praying Damian would ask her to reconsider, that he’d make at least one attempt to change her mind. Perhaps a raise or some other inducement. Instead, he calmly accepted her resignation as if he was almost pleased to see her go.
That hurt. She held the pain to herself for as long as she could, before turning and walking toward the door.
“Jessica.”
She stopped, but didn’t turn around.
“You’ve been a valuable asset to this firm, and we’ll miss you.”
That was all he was willing to offer. It was damn little.
“Thank you,” she whispered, then walked out the door.
She was trembling by the time she sat down at her own desk. After taking a moment to compose herself, she reached for the phone and dialed Cathy’s number.
“You did what?” her friend cried.
Jessica had never used the office phone for personal calls before, but she made this day the exception. “You heard me. I quit.”
“But why?”
“It’s a long story,” she murmured, “but suffice to say, I’m tired of this whole ridiculous charade.”
“Damian loves you.”
“No,” she whispered, “he doesn’t.” She’d been swayed by Cathy’s comments and her own foolish heart, because she so desperately wanted to believe it was true.
“Jessica, Jessica, Jessica,” Cathy said in an impatient singsong, “don’t be so hasty.”
It was either leave the firm or lose her sanity, Jessica mused. It’d been a mistake to contact Cathy; her friend simply didn’t understand.
“What did Evan say?”
“He doesn’t know yet,” she admitted reluctantly. Not that it would make any difference. No argument Evan offered could convince her to change her mind.
“Keep me informed, will you? Following what’s going on in your life is more interesting than my soap operas.”
Mrs. Sterling came into the office and stared at Jessica, looking as if she were about to burst into tears. “You’re leaving!”
This office had an information network the CIA would envy. Jessica didn’t bother to ask where Evan’s secretary had heard the news; it didn’t matter.
“But you can’t go now, not when Mr. Dryden’s back to his old self.”
“I apologize for leaving you in the lurch.”
“You won’t reconsider?”
Jessica shook her head.
“Personally,” said Mrs. Sterling, “I think it makes for bad politics when men and women from the same office date one another. These things have a way of turning sour.”
“What does?” Evan asked, stepping into the room, carrying a leather briefcase and looking very much the professional he was. He paused at his secretary’s desk and reached for his mail.
“Jessica’s resigned,” Mrs. Sterling said baldly.
Evan dropped the mail and turned to stare at Jessica. His mouth fell open with disbelief. “Is it true?”
She nodded. Until she saw the look of dismay on his face, she hadn’t believed he held any real affection for her.
“Come into my office,” he commanded, leading the way and clearly expecting her to follow. When she was inside, he closed the door.
“What’s this all about?” he demanded.
To the best of her memory, Jessica had never seen this side of Evan. He looked and acted like Damian. “It’s time I moved on,” she said weakly, not knowing exactly how much to say, if anything, about the real reason.
“After less than two months?”
She crossed her arms and shrugged.
“Are the hours too long?”
“No.”
“We’re not paying you enough?”
“I’m receiving an adequate salary,” she returned. She didn’t like the way he was putting her on the defensive, and she stiffened her resolve. There was a side of her he hadn’t seen, either—her stubborn side.
“There must be a reason you find it so repugnant to work for me.”
“I never said I found it repugnant to work for you.” She dropped her hands and formed tight fists at her sides. Evan was acting every inch the attorney.
“So it’s the firm you don’t like. Have we done something to offend you?”
“No!” she cried, hating this interrogation. Evan’s reaction was certainly the opposite of Damian’s. Evan was clearly upset at the idea of losing her.
“Then why? You owe me an explanation,” he insisted.
“I don’t feel I do…” She hesitated, her stomach in knots.
“Is it something I’ve done?” His voice was gentler now, as if he was trying to soothe her, to gain her confidence.
“No,” she assured him. “You’ve been wonderful…a good friend. I’ll treasure the times we’ve had together, Evan, but you don’t love me and I don’t love you. It seems to me that we should appreciate what we do share and not try to make something of it that isn’t there.” Or allow their parents to do so, either, she added mentally.
He looked puzzled. “That’s no reason to quit working for the firm.”
“Perhaps not, but it’s the right thing for me. Damian asked me to work out my two-week notice, which I’ll gladly do, but I’m not going to change my mind.”
“All right,” he agreed reluctantly. “In the meantime, you don’t mind if we continue to see one another, do you?”
“I’m…not sure it would be wise.”
Evan jerked back his head as though her answer amazed him. “You aren’t serious, are you?”
“Yes, Evan, I am. I enjoy your company and consider you a friend, but…”
“What about coffee to talk over old times?”
“Perhaps.”
Evan grinned then, that devilishly handsome grin guaranteed to stir the heart of any woman. “I’m not letting you back out of our sailing date, though. I’ve been counting on that. You aren’t going to let me down, are you?”
“No, I won’t let you down.” Nevertheless, Jessica’s heart sank as she remembered her promise to go out with Evan on his sailboat in three weeks’ time. He’d made the date before the formal dinner event. Before she’d known she wanted out of the Drydens’ sphere.
He beamed her a wide smile.
Jessica stayed late that night, wanting to clear her desk before she headed back to her apartment. Undaunted by her stated reluctance to continue
seeing him socially, Evan had asked her to dinner, and Jessica had declined. Besides, she’d been out late the night before, hadn’t slept well and was anxious to finish up at the office and head back to her apartment.
She was leaving just as Damian came out of his office.
“Good night,” she said cordially, moving down the corridor to wait for the elevator. Damian joined her there.
The doors opened and they stepped inside together. They stood like strangers while the elevator made its descent. Jessica stared at the numbers above the door as they lighted up one by one. Only a week earlier, she would have been thrilled to have these few seconds alone with Damian, and now she would have given anything to avoid him. Being this close to him physically and so far apart emotionally was agony in its purest form.
The elevator doors silently slid open, and Jessica stepped into the lobby, glad to make her escape. Damian would go about his life, and she would go about hers.
“Jessica.” Damian sounded impatient, but she didn’t know if it was with her or himself. “Are you taking the subway?”
“Yes, it’s right around the corner.” She began to move away.
“I’ll give you a ride home.”
“No, thank you.”
“I insist,” Damian said in steel tones. “It’s time we talked.”
If Jessica had thought her heart was beating hard that morning when she entered his office, it didn’t compare with the way it thundered against her ribs now.
Silently he led her into the parking garage to his car. He unlocked the passenger-side door and held it open for her, then went around to the driver’s side and climbed in. As he inserted the key into the ignition, he asked, “Have you spoken to Evan about your resignation?”
“Yes.”
“What did he have to say?”
She gestured weakly with her hands. “He asked me to reconsider.”
“Have you?”
“No. I’ll work out my two-week notice, since you asked me to, but my decision stands.”
Damian’s hands tightened around the steering wheel. “Why, Jessica?”
“Why should you care, Damian?” she returned, losing patience with him. “This morning, you couldn’t wait to be rid of me.”
“That’s not true,” he said sharply.