Awakening, The

  "Remember when you ran over a vampire with my car?"

  "Shit, do I," Alex said, running a hand through his hair.

  "Shattered the windscreen."

  "As if that's a comparison for all of this."

  "You know, I never got around to getting it fixed."

  They fell silent for a while until Alex waved at the city. "Everything feels...sharp, like the world's suddenly in HD."

  "Get used to it."

  "I don't remember all these stars being here before," he said, looking up at the sky.

  "Everything is multiplied ten times now. Sight, smell, sound. Even your emotions."

  "I feel like I could run for days and not even get tired."

  "You're faster and stronger. You'll have to compensate until you get used to it."

  "Is this burning normal?" Alex waved at his throat and swallowed hard, like he was trying to get rid of a bad taste.

  "Yep. Alcohol helps with that."

  "So, that's why you're such a booze hound."

  "What can I say? I had issues."

  "Had?"

  "I'm dealing."

  "Does the burning go away?"

  "It gets better with time," Zac said. "It's like when you were human and your stomach rumbles to tell you you're hungry..."

  "Great. I think I'd rather the rumbling stomach. This feels like acid reflux."

  "In the beginning, it's the thing that some vampires struggle with. It's like a itch you can't scratch and until it's sated, it just drives you mad. Some never get their heads around it. I had a lot of trouble with that and still do on occasion."

  "Does everyone go through that?"

  "No. Sam didn't. I guess because he had someone there to help him."

  "You."

  Zac grunted. "I won't leave you in the lurch, Alex. I've got your back for however long you want me around."

  "However long...that sounds like such a weird notion. I've got shit loads of time now, unless Aed bites me, right?"

  "Or you get into a fight with Aya."

  "Remind me never to piss her off."

  "I don't think you could, even if you tried. She thinks the sun shines out your ass."

  "Really?"

  "You were the first one of us to give a crap about her for the kind of person she is. I wanted her for what she could do for me and it took a long time to realize that your approach is a better way of going about things."

  "I guess we can learn a lot from each other, right?" Alex asked with a grin.

  "Ah, don't get too cocky," Zac said with a laugh and slapped his friend on the back. "You're taking this surprisingly well, you know. I thought this would be a lot harder."

  "I guess I'm not the traditional candidate for vampirism, hey?" he asked wryly.

  Zac frowned. "We'll be there for you, don't worry about that. You've got a shit load of support to draw on and there's no way in hell any of us will let anything happen to you. If we have our way, you'll live a billion years along with the rest of us."

  "Aw, shit. I don't want to think about a billion years. Talk to me in a hundred and I'll give you a status update."

  "Vampires have an inflated sense of time. We've got a lot of it, so urgency is not high on the agenda. You've got to know when to strike and when to hold back."

  "And now is one of those times to strike," Alex said, morosely.

  "That it is."

  Alex glanced at him, obviously wanting to ask something. After a moment of hesitation, he came out with it. "What do I do? I mean, for blood?"

  "Find a human, bite, drink."

  "I don't like the idea of sucking on some random's neck."

  "It gets easier."

  "But there's got to be another option, right? Sam and Liz feed on animals..."

  "That's all well and good, but feeding on a fluffy bunny rabbit isn't going to keep your strength up in the long run. Listen, feeding straight from humans isn't nice for everyone, but it keeps you strong and we need you strong. I'm sorry, it's just the way things are."

  "What if I can't stop? What if I hurt somebody?"

  "I'll be there to stop you," Zac said. "But you gotta know that being turned by a spell makes you very different from me. You're a lot stronger physically, for one."

  "So, you mightn't be able to stop me if I go mental?"

  "There's always the chance, but I don't believe it'll be an issue for you. You still care. Sometimes the process of turning can take that away. I've done it a few times and I don't recommend it, but when Aya left me and I went with Regulus...I saw her with Tristan and I just couldn't take it anymore."

  "What did you do?" Alex asked, looking a little alarmed.

  "I just turned it off." He shrugged, looking away. "Once your ability to care is gone, it takes your humanity away."

  "But you've come back."

  "Yes, but it takes a lot to want to," he explained. "If you don't have anything or anyone to care about, then some vampires never come back. They never have control. They never stop."

  "Then how did you? Was it because of Sam?"

  "Yes, because of Sam the first few times."

  "This time?"

  "Aya forced me. She jumped me from behind, snapped my neck, locked me in a dungeon and tortured me into coming back." Alex was staring at him with wide eyes. "It doesn't mean any of it will happen to you. I truly believe it won't."

  "It doesn't make me feel any better. It's against my nature and believe me, I know how ironic that sounds."

  "Don't worry about hurting anyone. You can compel them to be still so you can feed, heal the wound and make them forget it all happened."

  "Then after all of this is over, I can find some baby kittens."

  "That's the spirit," Zac said, stifling a laugh. "There's always pinching a few bags of blood from a hospital. Done that before. Or get yourself a vampire girlfriend."

  "Um, sounds...kinky?"

  Zac let out a loud laugh. "Doesn't satisfy your hunger a hundred percent, but it sure is satisfying in other ways."

  "Too much information, Zac. Keep that shit away from me."

  "Blood sharing is probably the most intimate you can get with another vampire. Humans have marriage, we have more fucked up means of commitment."

  "What does it taste like? Blood?"

  "It's hard to describe," Zac said. "Everyone tastes different."

  "What do you mean?"

  "It's like you can taste the kind of person they are. Sweet, sour. Good, bad. I guess it's something you have to experience for yourself. You'll like it. It's how you are now."

  "How I am now," Alex echoed, dropping his head into his hands, stifling a sob. "What have I done?"

  "Hey," Zac said. "It's fucked up, I know, but think about Isobel. Think about her, because you're her only hope right now. You can spend all your time agonizing over the fact that your life has changed, or you can spend that energy on the task at hand. There's plenty of time for moping after she's safe and sound. Anyway, I won't let you be a fucking mopey bastard."

  Alex sniffed. "What the fuck happened to you? Did Gabby replace your brain or something?"

  "I got a reality check," Zac said with a laugh. "I've been through my fair share of woe. If any good can come of that by sharing with you, then so be it."

  "I'm just worried about Izzy. Aed seemed to think she was his lost love or something. What if he's turned her into a vampire? What if he's hurt her? I'm suddenly this powerful founding vampire and I'm just sitting here."

  "You have to have hope, Alex. That's the only thing that gets you through. I was the master of diving in head first and asking questions later. Take it from me when I say we need to plan this. The only way we're going to get one up on Aed is with a solid, airtight plan. Besides, did you see the way he looked at her? I don't think he'd hurt a hair on her head. He said he wanted her to remember. Whoever this Siobhan is, he loved her and cares enough to give her time."

  "I hope so. I really do. I don't think I could ever forgive myself if we were too late.
"

  "It's not your fault. Gabby told you about it. Isobel would've been in a lot more trouble if we didn't show up when we did. We all would've."

  "It doesn't make it any better."

  Zac sighed, worried about him. If his state of mind was slipping, then it could mean trouble. Alex was the perfect candidate and their only one. If he faltered at the last minute it could mean everything was over for real. "When the Three get here in a few hours, we'll meet up at the warehouse that Aya and Tristan found. There's no use worrying about it until then. You're just working yourself up."

  Alex sighed sharply, rubbing his eyes. "Then tell me a story to take my mind off of it. You've probably seen a lot of stuff. Tell me something."

  "Nye's got some zingers," Zac said. "He's lived a lot longer. Aya still doesn't like to talk about her past, so don't even ask. I'm sure their stories are a lot nicer than mine."

  "What about Tristan? Do you guys still hate each other?"

  "No," Zac said, shaking his head. "We've got a shaky alliance these days."

  "I want to hear one of yours. I've known you a while now, but I don't really know you, if you get my meaning. Sam mentioned once that you enlisted in the army?"

  Zac grimaced at the memory. "I died in the Civil War and for a long time I thought killing was the only thing I was good at. It was the only thing I knew. I spent most of my vampire life enlisting in wars. In part because of that belief and the fact I couldn't curb my bloodlust. I used it as an excuse. If I was fighting and killing the bad guys then it was okay. It wasn't, it never will be."

  "What made you stop?"

  "The last time I enlisted I went to Vietnam. I thought I'd seen all the brutality that humans were capable of, but I was wrong." He shifted on the rooftop, glancing at Alex. "Are you sure you want to hear about this? It's not exactly award winning stuff here."

  "I guess it helps me understand you a bit better. You're one complex guy."

  Zac smiled wryly. That was an apt description if he ever heard one. "Napalm," he said, casting his eyes away.

  "Napalm?"

  "Some people called it sticky fire. Once it was lit and adhered to something…buildings, forest…people, it's almost impossible to stop. When I saw it used against the enemy and innocent people, I just threw down my gun and walked away."

  "Right there?" Alex's eyes were wide. With fear, horror, admiration…who the hell knew.

  "Right in the middle of a mission. I just turned around and never looked back. Their suffering was horrendous and even with all my strength and speed, there was nothing I could do. That was the day I decided to start trying again."

  "Shit, I had no idea."

  "Be the change you want to see in the world…" Zac said, remembering something Sam had once told him. He was sure his little brother had gotten that nugget of wisdom from someone a little more prolific. "It took me another forty years to understand that and it's the simplest thing in the world."

  "I think I get it," Alex said quietly. "Right now, I feel this sadness…I don't know how to explain it, but it's deeper than anything I've ever felt. It's almost overwhelming."

  "And that's what it's like to be a vampire holding on to your humanity. It's a constant struggle."

  "I'm sorry," he blurted.

  "What for?"

  "I never understood how hard you had it. How hard you must have struggled every day. I'm sorry I was so quick to brand you an asshole."

  Zac shook his head, surprised that Alex felt the need to apologize at all. "I was an asshole."

  "I'm still sorry." And that was why Alex made the perfect founding vampire.

  "If you ever need anything, Alex, put me on speed dial, okay?"

  Alex smiled and thumped him on the back. "You've got yourself a deal."

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

  Aya watched Zac and Alex on the rooftop and smiled.

  They really made an odd couple, but if anyone was equipped to help Alex with his change, it was Zac. After everything he'd been through in the last one-hundred and seventy years, he had a lot of wisdom to share. All the highs and lows a vampire could experience.

  Alex had been the most selfless one of them all since day one. Innocent in every aspect, he was the perfect founding vampire…and the perfect human. It was ironic that with all of the combined power that was assembling in Oxford tonight, that Alex was the one who was going to save them all.

  When she saw him jump from the roof and land across the street, she couldn't help smiling. He had a really good landing for his first try. He turned and saw her watching him and shrugged.

  "Hey," she called out.

  "Hey."

  Crossing the street, she said, "Nice landing."

  "Thanks, I think. It'll take some getting used to."

  She didn't want to ask the question, considering it would be the one everyone asked him for a while, so she cocked her head to the side.

  "I'm fine," he said with a thin smile. "I'm going inside to see Gabby. Zac's still on the roof."

  "Thanks." Before Alex could leave, she grabbed his arm and pulled him back. To his surprise, she circled her arms around his waist and leaned her head against his chest. She gave him a squeeze before letting him go. "We'll be in soon."

  Nodding, Alex stepped back and disappeared inside the apartment block. On the outside he seemed to be taking things really well, but since Aya had the unfortunate ability of being able to sense emotions, she knew it was another story under the surface. With a frown, she jumped to the roof, curious to see what Zac thought about it.

  He looked up as she landed, a little more delicately than Alex had done before and she felt at least a little guilty that she'd spied on their training session.

  "How is he?" she asked, sitting beside him.

  "As well as can be expected," Zac said, winding an arm around her back.

  "His emotions are all over the place," she mused, burying into his side.

  "They always are in the beginning and he has a lot of pressure to deal with at the moment."

  Aya sighed, curling her fingers through Zac's. He always had this knack for calming her down just when she needed it and she needed it now.

  "You're worried about him?"

  "I'm worried that he will hesitate at the last moment," she said. "He's too kind, too compassionate. I'm afraid he won't do what he needs to."

  "We'll be there to help him."

  "I know."

  They sat in silence for a while, pondering what was about to come. She'd just gotten Zac back and had almost lost him again yesterday. He wasn't as indestructible as her, no matter what he seemed to think. She'd spent so much time and effort pushing him away in the beginning, but now he was here and there was nothing she wouldn't do to save him. Without even asking him, she knew he felt the same and wasn't that what love was? Trust, selflessness, compassion?

  "I'm worried about you too, you know," she said, looking up at him.

  "You don't need to be," he said, glancing at her in the greying light.

  "You said it yourself, Aed almost had you if not for Isobel. I can't lose you, Zac. Not now. Not ever."

  "Hey," he whispered, sliding a hand over her cheek. "I'm not going anywhere without a fight."

  "It took me a long time to find you. I'm not willing to take any chances."

  He tilted her chin up and pressed his lips to hers. With a small moan, she kissed him back, her hands curling into the lapels of his coat. It was too easy to get lost in this and it was too easy for it all to be taken away. She'd lost him once and never wanted to go through that again.

  "Aya," Zac murmured, pulling away. "We'll always have worry in our lives, but with each other we can do anything."

  "Anything?" she asked, cocking her head to the side.

  His lips curved into a sly grin and he brushed a thumb over her lips. "Pretty much."

  "I intend to take you up on that offer once this is done."

  "I intend to allow you."

  "I'm going to take you places you've n
ever been, Zac Degaud."

  "Shit," he hissed. "I knew you were bad, but never wicked."

  With a smile, she pressed her lips to his again and when they parted it was breathless.

  "Faith, Aya," he whispered. "We'll get through this. All of us."

  "I hope you're right."

  "C'mon," he said, rising to his feet. "It's time to rock'n'roll."

  A sense of dread began to settle in her heart and as Aya took Zac's hand, she hoped it wasn't a premonition. She had the curse of living on while everything around her withered and died…and she would even outlive the immortal if she chose to. But despite all of that, she knew that she would do whatever it took to protect Gabby, Tristan, Zac and Alex from Aed. They had become her family when she was sure she'd never get to have one again. Forever and always, these were the people she'd die her true death for.

  Gabby looked up at the warehouse at the edge of Oxford for the second time in as many days. Had it really been yesterday that she'd stood here, gleaning information out of Aed's compelled vampire? Looking at the time on her cell phone, she supposed it was three days ago now. It was well past midnight and she yawned despite herself. It would be a while yet before she could get some sleep. It was a sad feeling to know that she was the only human left among her friends besides Isobel.

  Tristan appeared beside her and she smiled as he offered her his arm. She regretted that she hadn't had the chance to get to know him a little better, especially since Aya seemed to hold him in such high regard.

  As they weaved their way through the dark warehouse, four figures slowly came into focus through the shadows where they lingered. She recognized Nye immediately, he had that kind of presence about him, and Maddox she'd met the day before when they'd gone to get Katrin's grimoire. The other two men she supposed were the other members of the Three, Pyke and Rix. Dropping Tristan's arm, she glanced at Alex who grimaced in return. He didn't need to say anything, she felt exactly the same way.

  "How's your face?" Nye asked with a laugh, slapping Zac on the shoulder.

  "Flawless, thanks for asking," the vampire replied and the air seemed a little less heavy.

  They really were a sight. The newborn founder, Alex, and the Celestine hybrid, Aya, stood beside her. Then there was Zac, Tristan and Nye, otherwise known as the good guys. And finally there was the Three, aka the bad guys, Maddox, Pyke and Rix. Add her to the mix and there was an entry for the history books.