Her Forbidden Rockstar: A Forbidden Rockers Novel

  She really didn’t need to get fired on top of everything. She headed out of the coffee shop and chuckled at herself. Here she was, so worried about losing her job, and she didn’t even like it.

  Her dad wanted her to be a lawyer, which is why she was working as an entry level paralegal, but there was not a single bone in her entire body that wanted to be a lawyer. But as long as she continued working here, her bills got paid and her dad didn’t pester her, so she figured that was a plus.

  Although, he did check in with her at least once a week about when she was going to take the BAR exam and become an official lawyer, but she kept saying that she was still studying for it.

  That seemed to work for now, although she knew eventually she would either have to take the test or become a disappointment to her family. Caroline took a deep breath and finished her last few steps to the door of her office building, stepping inside for another day of work.

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  Friday morning was one of Caroline’s favorite times of the week, because it meant it was the last day of work before a weekend off. Most people in the law office left by 3pm at the very latest on Fridays, so usually she could escape from there a little early as well.

  She had been working so hard the last few days due to a large case, as well as being behind from her late start on Monday. She also was trying to stay in her boss’s good graces, since he did not take her tardiness on Monday well at all.

  After all the extra hours she had logged in the last three days, she was eager to get an early start on her weekend. She had been so busy that she had not even had time to go to the Java Jolt to pick up her morning coffee since Tuesday. Although, if she was being honest with herself, she had been avoiding her conversation with George.

  However, today she had left a little early, so she could chat with him. She hadn’t heard from Logan since he had spent the night with her on Monday night, leaving her completely confused as to what any of it had meant. Her emotions went on constant swings from irritated to lonely to angry to confused.

  Today, Caroline was sporting a gray pencil skirt beneath a breezy sheer pink blouse and pink camisole, along with nude high heels. She was feeling pretty confident, so she wasn’t as anxious as she thought she would be when she entered the coffee shop. She quickly got in line and waived at George, who had immediately spotted her. A few other baristas nodded at her as well with smiles, she was a regular so everyone knew her.

  A few minutes later, she was finally at the start of the line and handed her money over to the cashier, who was a new woman that she didn’t recognize. George signaled to her that he would talk to her over at one of the couches in the corner in a minute. She finished up her transaction and took her coffee over to the lounging area. George followed a few minutes later and plopped into a large chair across from her with a soda he was gulping down.

  “Every detail, don’t leave a thing out! Do you like him?” he stared, eagerly. Caroline grinned at him, trying not to blush.

  “Oh, hell. I don’t even know. It was wild. The concert was great, obviously, you’ve heard his music.” George nodded in agreement, he liked his music even though it wasn’t his favorite genre, since he liked softer, easier listening.

  “We went backstage after the concert and had a lot of fun. There were definitely sparks happening and I thought something was about to happen, but then he told me he had a girlfriend,” Caroline explained.

  George looked surprised, his eyebrows raised.

  “Yeah, that was my reaction, too. He wasn’t acting like someone who had a girlfriend. So, then nothing happened, obviously. Fast forward a day and he came to my house! Which you know, since you gave him my address. Thanks for that, by the way,” Caroline said sarcastically.

  “Sorry! I didn’t know he had a girlfriend! He seemed so infatuated with you. I wouldn’t have even guessed otherwise,” George defended himself, putting his hands up to signal his innocence.

  “Well, he said things are over with the girlfriend. That really it's more of a professional relationship, since she is also his manager. He says he can’t really end things ,because of how wrapped up she is in his career and how much she has done for him, whatever that means. He claims there is no romance left between them. He also claimed that he wanted to be with me and end things with her, but then I haven’t heard from him since he spent the night at my place on Monday.” Caroline continued.

  “Oh, see! I was right then! There is chemistry there,” George said proudly, patting himself on the back and smiling.

  Caroline sighed, wishing he was wrong. “Yeah, there is definitely chemistry. I don’t know what to do. I am not the kind of girl that dates a man involved with someone else. I don’t want to be some side fling. He swears things are ending with her, but I don’t know what to believe anymore.”

  “Well, if it is meant to happen, then things will work out. I wouldn’t stress about it that much. If you know that you don’t want anything to do with him while he has that girlfriend, just tell him that and stick to it. Make him have to raise the bar in order to be with you. But from what you described, he sounds like a man in love, and not with his girlfriend.” George smiled, standing up to head back to work since his break was almost over.

  “Yeah, you’re right. That’s what I will have to do, I guess. If I ever hear from him again, that is.”

  Something caught her attention off to the side of George as she finished her sentence. George’s eyes followed hers to see what she was looking at. The café had several televisions and one of them, behind George, was on a morning talk show where Logan’s face was smiling back at her. The two stared at the television for a moment reading the closed captioning, since the volume was turned off. Logan was being interviewed by two cheerful hosts smiling back at him. The camera panned out for a moment, which was when Caroline realized that Gina was sitting next to Logan.

  “Is that her?” George said to Caroline, pointing at the television.

  Caroline couldn’t speak, but nodded in confirmation. Her eyes were glued to the screen. Logan’s arm was relaxed across Gina’s shoulders and the words scrolling at the bottom of the screen were discussing an upcoming tour.

  “It’s going to be six months long around the globe and it is going to be jam packed. Everything from international to the states, east coast to west coast, finally ending in Las Vegas. Then, I will be back home sleeping, because I will be exhausted,” Logan was telling the host, jokingly.

  “And you know what they say, what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas,” Gina chimed in, winking at the cameras. Her hand was patting Logan’s knee.

  “Will we be hearing any Vegas wedding bells?” The host laughed.

  “I wouldn’t want to spoil the surprise!” Gina replied, smiling at the host and leaning over to Logan.

  He responded by kissing her. Caroline jolted back in her seat at the sight of their lips locked. Logan was smiling, he didn’t even look phased. He looked perfectly happy to be with her, cuddling up on the couch in front of the world. George turned back and looked at Caroline, a worried look on his face.

  “Looks to me like they are not as done as he said,” George told her.

  “Apparently not,” Caroline said, her teeth clenched together.

  She looked away from the television. She wasn’t going to watch the rest of this. She couldn’t.

  “I might as well head into work early, no point in torturing myself by watching this.”

  “Sorry, Caroline. I am sure there is an explanation for it, though. Try to keep an open mind!” George called after her as she headed towards the exit. She appreciated the advice, but she was tired of being open.

  Her heart had been open and he just kept hurting her. She was officially closed.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  “Why are you even upset?” Gina asking him as Logan was stomping off of the set of the talk show with Gina at his heels.

  “You pretty much just announced to the world that we are engaged, Gina! I don’t kno
w about you, but I don’t remember proposing,” Logan responded, irritated.

  “Yeah, but it’s only a matter of time. We wanted this whole tour to go through before we thought about anything else. We can announce our engagement officially after the tour is over.” Gina shrugged, tossing her hair over her shoulder as she grabbed her purse and followed Logan out of the studio.

  “Gina, that is my point. I never said anything about getting engaged. It’s like everything is a business arrangement to you. Marriage isn’t a business, getting engaged isn’t a public relations move. It’s as if my opinion doesn’t even matter to you!” Logan was walking a little faster, so that she would have to speed up to keep up with him.

  “Logan, this is what is best for your career. I am your business manager. The whole bad boy façade is not getting the same ratings anymore, people want romance and to see you are a relationship man. I have done several focus groups on it. So, that is what we need to do. Really, I don’t think you appreciate how much I do for your brand. The fact that you are even questioning me on this is just self-destructive. Do you want to be a dried up rock star out of the limelight?” Gina scoffed at him, getting into the passenger side of the car as Logan climbed into the driver's seat.

  Logan shook his head in annoyance and sighed.

  “You’re right, I am sorry. I know you do a lot for me,” Logan said, defeated.

  He didn’t want to sit here and argue with her for another few hours, because he knew the result would be the same either way. Gina just couldn’t understand the difference between business and love. Until last week, Logan probably hadn’t known the difference either, but then Caroline waltzed into his life. As he started driving back toward the penthouse, Gina kept talking about upcoming plans, but Logan had tuned out. He was remembering how beautiful Caroline had looked when he first saw her one week ago exactly and the way she felt so warm pressed against him when he woke up with her a few mornings ago. Her hair had been a bit tossed about, but her face was completely calm and peaceful.

  She hadn’t been wearing any makeup, but she still looked more beautiful than anyone he had ever seen. He felt like she was made to fit him perfectly, carved into his side, as if she was that missing piece he had never been able to fill. A place that was now empty again as he sat here with Gina instead. It had killed him to leave before she had awoken, but he didn’t know what else to do. He knew it was cowardly, but he didn’t know what to say to her if she woke up. He knew she wanted nothing to do with him while he was with Gina, and he couldn’t see how he was ever going to get out of that.

  When he had pulled his arm out from under her, she had sighed gently and curled up into her pillow. He had leaned down and kissed her forehead, luxuriating in the scent of her hair and the softness of her skin. He hadn’t spoken to her since that night, although he thought of her every moment. Now he had practically just made out with Gina on national television. He could only hope that Caroline had not been watching. He didn’t know why he hadn’t tried to contact her, only that he knew she deserved better than what he was currently offering her.

  He was leaving tomorrow morning for his six month tour, he dreaded going all that time without seeing Caroline. He knew he wanted to try to see her before he left, but would she even want to see him? And how would he find a moment away from Gina? She had been glued to his side lately in preparation for the. Logan continued to think this over as he pulled into his parking space below the building where his penthouse was.

  The couple got out of the car and rode the elevator up in silence and then went to opposite ends of the apartment, as was their usual routine. Logan was in the bedroom, finishing packing up his bags for the tour. When he was done, he placed his bags by the elevator doors and grabbed his paint brush to finish up painting. He wanted to complete this before his tour, hoping maybe it would convince Caroline to see him tonight.

  He was almost done with everything except the girl in the window, which was the only unpainted part. He started there with gentle strokes, creating her figure. There was still a rip in the side of the painting, but he had taped the back of the canvas together with strong masking tape which made it less noticeable. With a little paint over the area, it wasn’t too hard to blend it in so it looked like part of the painting. As time slipped past, Logan was so absorbed in what he was doing that he hadn’t realized that Gina was in the room watching him.

  “Who is she?” Gina said, standing behind him. Logan wasn’t paying attention and just kept painting. Gina took a few steps forward and to his side, turning to look him in the eyes. He finally noticed her.

  “What?”

  “Who is she?” Gina spoke again, her hands folded over her chest.

  “Haven’t we gone through this before, Gina?” Logan sighed and went back to painting.

  “She isn’t just an inspiration to you. I can see it on your face while you paint her,” Gina said, sadness in her voice.

  “Gina, it’s just a painting.” He was still concentrating on his strokes.

  She continued to stand there, but then slowly nodded her head and walked away, leaving the room. Logan let out a sigh. He was glad she hadn’t blown up or gotten angry, but he felt even more guilty knowing he was hurting her. She had looked really sad, which he hadn’t seen on her in a while. He stopped painting and put the brush down. He hadn’t seen her showing any type of real emotion in a long time, it reminded him of the Gina he had first dated.

  He looked at his painting of Caroline, almost entirely complete. He felt his heart warm just at the thought of her, but then he looked toward the doorway that Gina had walked through and he felt overwhelmed. He headed over to find her.

  “Gina?” Logan called out, walking into the kitchen. She was standing at the island counter, typing on a laptop computer. Logan walked up behind her and circled his arms around her, pulling her close to him. She breathed out a sigh of relief and leaned back into him.

  “This is a nice surprise,” she said, softly.

  He didn’t say anything, but just held her and kissed her neck. They rocked slightly back and forth together and quietly spent a few moments just relishing the feeling of being themselves again. It was like they were the old Logan and Gina again, feeling that warmth together of being a couple, instead of business partners.

  “What happened to us, Gina?” Logan whispered softly into her ear.

  She didn’t respond. She just closed her eyes and continued to stay wrapped in his arms. She didn’t have an answer for him, she didn’t know what had happened either. She knew that business had become more important than romance. They weren’t themselves anymore.

  She wasn’t sure why he couldn’t just be okay with the way things were now, because they were pulling in eight, nine, sometimes ten figures a year with the combination of his talent and her business sense. She felt a heaviness in her heart at the feeling of his arms around her, like even though he was there with her, he was still somewhere else.

  “She isn’t just a painting to me,” Logan admitted.

  Gina nodded, pulling away from him. The moment was gone.

  “I know,” she said simply, then went back to typing on her computer, completely disconnecting herself from him. He stood behind her for a few moments, then dropped his head and walked out of the room.

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  “What are you looking for?” Caroline asked, walking into the kitchen hearing all the clattering. Aralia was rummaging around Caroline’s kitchen, tossing through each drawer.

  “A corkscrew, of course. Where is it? Mine is kept hanging right next to the fridge, so it’s always in sight. I don’t know why anyone would hide theirs away. No respect for the wine!” Aralia said, only partially joking. Caroline rolled her eyes and pulled open a drawer that Aralia hadn’t gotten to yet, revealing a corkscrew.

  “Here you go, diva.” Caroline laughed and walked back to the living room.

  She was still in her skirt and blouse from work, minus the high heels. She plopped down on the cou
ch and grabbed one of the magazines that Aralia had brought with her. The two girls were spending the night just relaxing. They both agreed that last weekend had been more partying than it should have been, so they decided this weekend was going to be the opposite. However, that didn’t mean wine was off limits.

  You always had to have wine. It just goes without saying.

  Aralia waltzed into the room a few moments later and handed Caroline a cold wine glass, filled with pinot grigio. She took a sip and closed her eyes, enjoying the pleasurable taste after such a long week. Aralia walked over to the television and slipped a DVD in, getting the movie started.

  It was a recent romantic comedy that they hadn’t seen yet, so they decided it would be perfect for a girl’s night. Aralia plopped down on the couch next to her and took a big gulp of her own wine. Just as the movie credits were beginning to start, Caroline’s doorbell rang. She hopped up to go answer it.

  “Jackie finally made it!” Caroline said to Aralia, as she went to open the door. When she pulled open the door, she was surprised to see that Jackie wasn’t alone. Logan was standing there next to her, holding a brown, rectangular package.

  “I found him downstairs looking like a kicked puppy, so don’t blame me!” Jackie said, waltzing right past Caroline. She tossed her hands up in surrender, hoping Caroline wouldn’t be mad at her. Caroline stared at Logan, barely hearing what Jackie had said. Jackie and Aralia were murmuring in the other room, Caroline could only imagine the gossip that was probably going on right now.

  Logan looked down at the ground. “I’m sorry to interrupt your evening.”

  “Somehow, I doubt that,” she responded, crossing her arms and clenching her jaw in an attempt to show confidence and indifference.

  “I just had to see you, Caroline. I’m leaving for tour tomorrow.” He took a step into the doorway, coming closer to her.