Vindicate
“As always very wise words. Ones I can only hope to understand one day.”
“There is more . So much more,” Olivia said, closing the book. “I think you are a modern myth.”
“I may be modern, but I am very real; not a myth.”
“That is not what I am saying. Listen, what you are doing now – the battles you face – the emotions – the realization –will be stories told in this dimension – Chara – for thousands of years. You are the example.”
“Example of what ? How to die?” I said, breaking eye contact with her. I didn’t want that weight. I didn’t want a nyone to remember what I’d done. How foolish I can be.
“No. How to live. I truly believe that these trials are nothing mor e than a coming of age for you. Not life and death.”
“They are hell . Not a coming of age . They hurt people, and I don’t even know why . No one does. Every m inute, another layer is added and at the same time, what I was supposed to worry about is gone.”
She moved her head side to side with frustration. “Do you deny that when these trials are over that you w ill not be a different person? That now, four trials in, you are already not a different person?”
“No. But what happens at the end ? What happens after every effect of the planets is faced?” I asked with an ever-growing disdain in my tone.
“Change . There are twelve signs in the zodiac, then the sun . Twelve. Then the light. How do you know that this is not some kind of spiritual journey ? Where you are taken f rom a girl locked in a reality to a person, a soul, which is above that . A girl that finds a way to love all, to see beauty in everything?”
“Don’t add more trials to me . Ten. Eight beyond the sun and moon . A nd how do I know that the light is not the end?”
“Seriously, Willow, every zodiac sign is ruled by a planet . Twelve, then the sun makes sense to me.” She put the book down on the back of the couch and crossed her arms. “What kind of myth do you think generations after this need? Are we supposed to just tell them that we are born with illumination? That people like Libby and Preston just came to be ? A nd people like you and me are the cavemen of history . The savages? Don’t you think that stories that show how one goes from one point to the next – stories that show life is joyful and sorrowful at the same time would have more of an impact ? That they would protect mankind from falling back into our darkest days?”
I raised my eyes to her and locked my jaw, refusing to answer her. I knew when she tapped into this level of thought that there was no convincing her that she may be wrong . A t the very least, a little to o eager to find reason in the unexplainable.
Seeing that I was going to let her get it out of her system, she conti nued. “Look what you have done. I magine some little girl thousands of years from now hearing a story that was ever so slightly altered with time. Let’s start at the beginning,” she said, holding out one finger.
“A poor girl was given true love, and then she was tempted with fame and power . The girl chose love, knowi ng that love is above all fame. That it’s power.” She raised another finger.
“A girl strives to help all, to force others to change, and one day she fell into a soul that was not hers. A life that was not hers . A nd all the while, her soul was whispering to her – telling her who she was – to come home – that if one does not want to be saved, they cannot. The girl learned that by helping you see all sides of a story . That you are protected from all harm . That those who are ready to be helped will be, and those who are not should be given that right.” She raised another finger.
“A girl was asked to take the life of the man she loved . Promised that if she did so t hat her kingdom would be saved, but she chose her life. Not because she was selfish, but because she understood that all things are not what they seem . That there are no absolutes . That if you listen to your heart – follow your gut feeling, you find the answers that have yet to be written.” She raised her fourth finger .
“A girl is lost i n the worries of everyday life, consumed by all that does not matter . So, the heavens put her to sleep. I nto a dream world that allowed h er to fight the hardest battle. The battle with one’s own mind, and when she awoke, she could see clearly . Clearly enoug h to save all that needed her. She found acceptance with her weakness, powers that have always been within. She found salvation in her flaws by embracing them.” Olivia raised her thumb.
“Now, Willow, what will this story say? That a girl was robbed of the one she loved – and in retaliation, she committed murder ? She invoked war? Or could it say that she found strength in her broken heart ? That her eyes were opened once more to a wor ld that was always around her. That she looked out her window and realized that she was nothing more than a small piece of a very large puzzle, and that piece must exist for the world to feel complete. That somehow she not only saved the one she loved but found a way back to the innocence she once w as? This is your story, Willow. Your myth .” She paused as she looked carefully over every inch of my face. “ I want you to be the good guy… but I could want that all day, and it would not make a difference unless you wanted it for yourself.”
“Are you done?” I asked.
She crossed her arms and nodded once.
“The thi ng about myths is that they are myths. They take the highlights and le ave out what was truly endured. Thought s. Emotions. Things that can never be confessed because there are no words to describe them. I’m human . I feel deeply. I love and hate on a level that I cannot express in any painting.” I glanced around the room trying to find an escape from my best friends all knowing gaze. “I can’t tell you what story will come out of this . Because I don’t know . A ll I can tell you is that I will them back. Even if that means that I have to embrace the evil side of my soul . Because I’m selfish. I’m human.”
“You know, Willow, they never tell myths about perfect people; they tell myths about imperfect people who were the least likely to overcome a challenge before them. You are a Scorpio, the one sign that embraces revenge, even rage. If a Scorpio can over come the irony of forgiveness anyone can.”
I let a sardonic grin come to me. “We are going to have to agree to disagree. I don’t have time for the philosophy that you, August or even Madison has to give me. I have a Realm that I need to invade. Are you coming or not?”
“Death is calling,” she mumbled.
“I’m not going to kill you, and if you belie ve I am because of that dream don’t come. Don’t make me worry about that. I love you too much.”
“I don’t believe you are going to kill me. I believe you may try. I meant that the Realm is death. I’m ready when you are.”
Chapter Twelve
Olivia held out her arm and bowed her head in an attempt to overly mock that I was leading her. I let out a frustrated sigh as I walked past her. When I reached the threshold of the hallway, I heard music. I t was ele ctrifying . I felt my co nfidence build as I heard it. It was like a call to battle, and I was ready for battle.
I saw Madison and Charlie a few doors down from the room Landen was in, from where the music was coming from. Charlie’s arms were crossed as she listened to Madison. Without even noticing Charlie’s frustrated, guilty emotion, I knew they were fighting, at the very least disagreeing on something. I imagined it was the secrets Charlie had kept from Madison. I felt bad for Charlie. I could only imagine how hard it was for her to know that the one Madison dreamed of was r eal. How hard it was for her to know that if she didn’t say something soon that the other boy – Brit ain, would have won her heart. Their friendship reminded me of Olivia’s and mine. I could sense a deep bond, one that stated they had overcome too much tog ether to ever say goodbye. To ever really be mad at each other.
I noticed something else. There was a large painting a few feet from them. I thought I saw it move and focused my eyes on it and walked faster – almost ran to where they were. Just as I did that, the painting fell forward and two men pushed through. Before Charlie or Madison could rea
ct, one of the men had came up behind Madison. With one arm he held her mouth closed, and with the other he held a knife to her rib cage. The other man was holding Charlie’s mouth closed, muffling her screams as he held her against the wall.
Charlie kneed him in the groin, then screamed, “Show yourself!” On demand, shadows from every corner rose and mocked the images of the men – all chanting Charlie’s name. The man grabbed her shoulders once more and threw Charlie against the wall and yelled, “Call your demons off!”
With one thought, my energy soared down the hall. I focused on the one that was holding Mad ison. I was too careless . When he was knocked away, the blade of his knife sliced through her side and she screamed in agony.
I looked at the man holding Charlie, and with a thought he was pulled away from her and pinned against the wall. I reached my hand out, sending energy to hold down the one that hurt Madison.
Olivia ran to Madison, who had pulled herself into a fetal position as blood pooled on the floor around her. Ch arlie was saying random words. Not English. They almost sound demonic, but the shadows were responding; they were fading into the light with her words, then all at once a blinding light filled the hall, taking whatever ghost s Charlie had called away.
I sauntered over to the man that had cut Madison. With my e nergy, I picked him up and slammed him against the wall next to the other . With that force, the wall trembled and the music a few doors down stopped abruptly .
I was full of rage. I knew without a doubt that blade was meant for me . That these bastard s were sent to kill me. “Wrong. Girl!” I seethed through gritted teeth. My energy was suffocating them, and I could see the fear in their eyes. It brought pure, dark, joy to my soul.
“Who are you?! Who sent you?! Who co ndemned you to death?!” I bellowed .
I felt Draven, Ade n, Brady, and my father rush into the hall, but I ignored them.
“Answer me!” I demanded as I my energy thrashed out at them once more .
“We do not address evil,” said the man that hurt Madison.
“I’ll show you evil,” I said as I pushed harder with my energy. I could swear I could hear their bones cracking, and I wasn’t sorry. Not . A t . A ll.
I felt strong arms come around me, holding me back. “Breathe,” Brady whis pered. “You are not this girl. You do not kill.”
I tried to push him back. To gain my focus again on the men, but I couldn’t. “Willow . I f Landen were standing here, would he let you kill them?”
I turned in his arms abruptly hearing the bodies of the men behind me fall to the floor. “If someone had just tried to kill me, he would not be calm,” I argued, looking into Brady’s peaceful eyes.
He glared. “He would n ot kill. He would ask why. He would try to understand where they came from.” Brady argued.
“Well, maybe I’m channeling Drake . Maybe I see why execution is neede d if you rule a kingdom,” I mocked with heavy sarcasm.
“That’s B.S., and you know it. Drake would never kill without reason.”
“I had reason!”
“Do you?! How do you know they are not brainwashed? How do you know that these people are not already victims? You’re not asking why. Drake would ask why! Landen would ask why!”
“I’m Willow! I did ask why, and that piece of crap called me evil!”
“Are you?!” he said, losing his calm. “Who is my brother coming home to? Is it the innocent girl he found by a river crying ? One that only wanted ever yone to feel the good emotions? Or has she become someone else ? Someone that she doesn’t even recognize?!”
I swallowed hard, feeling the truth in his words. “I wo uldn’t have killed them,” I muttered under my breath. I vigorously twirled my ring as I listened for a raging storm. There wasn’t one. Those men took the blunt of my wrath.
Brady pulled me against him and rocked me from side to side. “Until you understand how strong you are you going to have to be careful. You are going to have to find control.” He looked down, then pulled my chin up so I would have to look into hi s eyes. “I know you’re in there. I know that innocent soul who wants peace is in there . Don’t lose her . Swear .”
“Promise,” I said as I swallowed the tears that were encasing my throat.
I stepped back from Brady. Draven was holding Ch arlie back from Madison’s side and it was taking everything he had to do that. Aden was on the floor next to Madison, and my father was at her side.
Men were filling the hall, ones I knew from Chara, ones I was sure Stella had sent here. My father was telling them what he needed. Olivia had pushed through the crowd . She had the intent to find Alamos. Perodine.
“How bad is it?” I asked my dad as I fell to my knees by Madison. Sweat was pouring off her. My father had ripped her shirt back and was holding her wound closed with his hands. It was at least four inches long and ra n across the base of her ribs. I hated to think of how deep it was . How painful it was.
“Bad,” my father said without looking up at me. I felt his fear for her. “The blade punctured her lung. She needs surgery.”
I locked eyes with Madison. I saw the reflection of fear. The fading grasp of consciousness. I felt guilt; this was meant for me. If I had been more careful, I could have prevented this. I sho uld have focused on the knife. I should have thought before I acted. I put my hands on her face and closed my eyes. I knew if I was going to think of any emotion that would help her that I had to block out what I’d done . The result of it. The heavy aroma of blood was making me dizzy.
I took in deep breaths and called Landen to my memory. I blocked out the sound . The emotions full of fear and intensity, and found silence. In my thoughts, I stared into his blues eyes, ones that were always calm, even in the heat of adversity, the ones that embraced the insights given to him with awe and respect.
In my thoughts, I watched him heal. I replayed the lesson Pelhan had given him . The Roses. The thorns. The exp lanation that in order to heal you must want to giv e all that you are to another. You must have no regard for your own well being . Your intent – your energy must be pure. I watched the blood drip from the thorns in my memory. I watched him heal Drake, the wound on his neck , and the one in his side. I watched him heal me. I watched him save my life.
I felt a hum in my soul. I heard hi m say my name. I heard him tell me that I could do this. That he believed in me. His voice – his eyes t ook me away from that moment. They took me deep inside of myself. I barely noticed my father reach for my hands. Even when I felt Madison’s warm blood beneath my skin, I didn’t move from that thought. That peace, that for giveness that Landen always had.
Then all at once, the blue eyes I was staring into grew serious and the lips I ached to kiss said, “Heal.” A force of energy jolted my eyes open. My father’s hands were on mine, holding the wound that was becoming s maller with each second.
I set my intent to heal her, to take it all away. In that moment, my hands began to glow . The ring on my finger began to spin, her skin began to glow, and I could see my energy, who I was, seep into her skin, into her soul. The wound vanished. I had healed and had no idea how I did it.
I raised my hands and stared at them as fast, deep breaths escaped me. I had never once been this taken by an insight. The insight to emotion was just as painful as it was blissful . Truth and intent were the same. Moving your energy was some thing done in defense. Having Mother Nature reflect your emotions in the atmosphere was more dangerous than b eneficial. But healing…healing was on another level. I t was a level that could bring no harm. A level that was mind numbing. Every single part of me – ever y cell in my body was on fire. I felt immortal. I felt as if there was nothing I could not do.
Landen had made it seem so simple, effortless, something that gave no reward, only drained energy, but I wasn’t drained; I had more energy now than any memory of La nden could give me. I felt him. I felt him inside of me.
The tension in the hall washed away, and serenity took over, complementing the silence
. No one kne w what to say. Madison rose slowly, holding the place on her stomach that had been healed. She looked up at me – she didn’t have to say th ank you. I saw it in her eyes. I swear I could feel the gratitude from her. She reached her arms around me and swayed back and forth, taking in the moment; we were bonded. We were not two girls trying to understand the other. I t didn’t matter that the opinions and views we had may differ . That what I wanted and what she wanted were not the same. I knew in the moment I healed her that she understood me. She felt the power of what any one soul could become.
“I felt everything,” she whispered. I pulled away slightly and looked into her emerald green eyes that were fightin g back tears. “I felt your soul. I felt your h eart. Your passion.”
“And yet you still seem happy,” I said, trying to hold on to the fearless person I needed to be. That I had to be.
“I see Drake ,” she said in a voice I could only hear. “I see him the way you do.”
I moved my head from side to side as shock came over me. I never understood this energy thing. This emotion thing. I knew in theory that my energy was now combined with Landen and Drake’s, that we were bonded. I didn’t care that a little piec e of that was given to Madison. That it healed he r. I did care that she saw either of them the way I did because the way I felt a bout both of them was private. The emotions between the three of us were ours to bear and no one else’s.
“Forget that. See him through your eyes.”
“I can’t.”
Those two words, that selfless look in her eyes, told me that she was holding on to my energy so she could save them. That before this moment she’d felt guilty for being here, for leaving others, Britain, behind. But now, after seeing life through my eyes she felt vindicated. She knew she could fight to save them without regret because she was in my debt.