Learning to Live (The Infinite Love Series Book 1)

  “Why am I not surprised?” I ask, my eyes darting around at everything in front of me.

  He chuckles. “I haven’t been down here in a really long time. I forgot how cool it is.”

  Must be nice to have anything you could ever want at your fingertips. Amazing cars, ridiculous house, game room…

  “Well what is exciting to other people probably doesn’t excite you,” I state as I slide my fingers over the wood of the pool table.

  “Why do you say that?”

  “Because you have everything you could ever want.” I look around in an attempt to make my point.

  His smile turns into a frown. “Just because we’re financially stable doesn’t mean I have it easy. There is a lot you don’t know about me.”

  I ponder his statement. I know money isn’t everything but I can tell you it is the solution to the majority of my problems.

  “So, are we going to battle it out?” I ask.

  He raises his eyebrows in surprise. “Yeah, what’s your game of choice?”

  I look between all the different options. “I’m down for some air hockey.”

  He breaks out into a wide grin, and then struts over to the table, turning the power on. “You’re in trouble. I’m the air hockey king.”

  I shake my head dismissively at his comment. He has no idea how badly I am going to school him.

  * * *

  An hour and a half later, after we have attacked the game room with a vengeance, we hear what sounds like the garage.

  Topher sticks his ear up in the air. “My dad is home early tonight.”

  It’s nearing five and I should probably be going anyway. I stand and slip my hoodie back on.

  The garage door opens which is located on the same floor we are on, and a chorus of footsteps rings through. Topher’s face contorts into an ugly expression before he races out of the room.

  “Topher,” I hear a gentleman’s voice say. “I didn’t think you were going to be home until later…”

  Someone clears their throat and I stay deathly quiet. I’m not exactly sure what is going on, but I know it has nothing to do with me.

  “My detention was cut short,” I barely recognize Topher’s voice. It seems stiff and clipped.

  I can feel the tension piercing the air. I am growing more uncomfortable by the moment. I could slip out, but my damn backpack is in the back of Topher’s car!

  “I’m sorry Topher, I didn’t know.” The gentleman apologizes.

  I hear footsteps making their way back toward the game room, when a third voice cuts through the air. “I’m not.”

  The footsteps stop abruptly.

  “Clarke?”

  “What do you want me to do? Apologize like you? We’ve been doing that for weeks now. Walking around on egg shells. This is your house for God’s sake! I’m tired of having to sneak around especially now that the cat is out of the bag.” The third male voice speaks.

  I’m still not exactly sure what I am overhearing, but something tells me this is a private conversation. I cross my arms over my chest awkwardly. It’s not as if I’m going out of my way to eavesdrop.

  “Classy, Dad. Take your boyfriend’s side over your own flesh and blood,” Topher spits out, and then I hear footsteps pounding the marble flooring back to the room I am in. My heartbeat begins to speed up as I realize the gravity of what I’ve just heard.

  Topher rounds the corner and glares down at me. “Come on, I’m taking you home.”

  I jump up quickly and follow him out. We manage to not cross paths with the other two in the process of making it outside, and I am thankful for that. I know I was not meant to hear that conversation, and I don’t want to deal with any more drama.

  Topher doesn’t say a word to me as he unlocks the doors, and we climb in. In fact, we ride almost the entire way to my apartment in complete silence. He avoids all eye contact with me, and I’m starting to think he may be upset with me for what I overheard.

  As we close in on my apartment, I decide it’s now or never to comment on what happened. “I won’t say anything about what I heard.”

  His eyes remain focused out the front window.

  “You know, it’s okay to be angry with him…but he’s still your father.”

  “What do you even know?” Topher growls at me.

  It feels like a slap in the face after our progress today. I swallow before answering, attempting to find the right words. “I know that you have a father…something I’ve never had the privilege of experiencing. And I know that he loves you.”

  “You don’t know a God damn thing!” Topher bellows, slamming the steering wheel with his hand angrily.

  Tears sting the back of my eyes, and I look out the side window the entire rest of the way back. I can feel his eyes on me a couple of times, but I don’t dare look his way. When he pulls up in front of my apartment, I hastily grab my backpack, and hop out of his car. Today was a mistake. I know that now.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Topher

  I’m so angry I can barely see straight. After dropping Ciera off back at her place, I drive aimlessly for hours. Eventually, I find myself along the Oregon coast at the beach. I park the car, and end up seated in the sand watching the waves crashing onto the beach and the sun set.

  I can’t believe he brought him there. I can’t believe Ciera heard everything. I know she said she wouldn’t say anything, but I wouldn’t blame her if she did. She’s got leverage on me that could annihilate my reputation. I hate that she has that power.

  I pull out my phone, searching my contacts. I need a distraction.

  It’s a school night, but I don’t care. It’s still pretty early as I write Alyssa. The girl is a witch with a capital B, but I know she’s always had the hots for me. She’s easy on the eyes, and I heard a freak in the bed, but I’ve never done anything out of respect for Sophia. Now that Sophia is out of my life, I can do whatever the hell I want.

  What are you up to? I write.

  I know she’s been seeing some college football player for the past few months, but I know she has been after my balls for years now. Something tells me she will want to play.

  Not even five minutes later, I have a response from her. Just going for a late night swim. You want to join?

  Sure, be there in twenty. Alyssa’s family has a pretty awesome heated pool with a grotto. I’ve enjoyed it on numerous occasions. If I drive fast enough, I can even make it there in fifteen minutes. I don’t have a pair of swimming trunks on me, but that won’t stop me.

  When I pull up to Alyssa’s, all the lights are off except for the backdoor floodlights. I bypass her actual house, and head straight for the metal gate I’ve entered through countless times. It’s unlocked, and I let myself in, and see her lit pool in front of me. Steam is rolling off the water, and over the cement as I approach. Alyssa is nowhere in sight.

  “Alyssa?” I call out, walking closer to the grotto.

  “Up here!” Her voice rings out from the gazebo. It is placed at the top of a hill, and I can now see her seated inside, her red bikini top peeking out from above the water. I walk up the cement stairs to greet her.

  Her blond hair is pulled up into a messy bun, but she is wearing bright red lipstick to match her bikini. It’s actually a turn-off. I don’t want to have to worry about the mess that stuff is going to leave.

  “Well aren’t you a sight for sore eyes?” she purrs from her position inside the hot tub. I feign a smile.

  “You coming in?” I nod, and then begin unbuckling my jeans, removing my shoes and socks. I pull my t-shirt over my head, and all I am left in is my boxer-briefs. Her eyes trail up and down my body hungrily. She tilts her head to the side playfully.

  I climb into the scorching hot water, and sit back against the white acrylic.

  “So, I was surprised to hear from you.” She bats her eyes at me. I’m sure that makes other guys crazy…me, not so much. I just start to wonder if she has something stuck in her eye.

  “Oh
yeah?” I scoot a little closer to her. “And why is that?”

  “Oh, you know, you’re Sophia’s ex…so you’re off limits. And…I’ve been hearing some rumors that you’ve been hanging out with that disgusting freak, Ciera. Although, I figure you’ve just been doing your due diligence.”

  My eyes narrow. I don’t give a shit what she says about Sophia, but Ciera doesn’t deserve that. I quickly grab Alyssa by the wrists and wrench her into me. “I could give two shits about Sophia.”

  She looks surprised by my roughness. I lean in closer so she can feel my breath on her face.

  “I heard what you did to Ciera.”

  She throws her head back, cackling. “Oh my God, she deserved it!”

  My glare intensifies until she has stopped laughing entirely. My grip on her wrists has tightened, and now her expression is slowly changing into fear. “You’re going to leave Ciera alone from now on, do you hear me?”

  Alyssa’s eyes widen. “Oh my God…the rumors are true. I can’t believe it.”

  I push her back up against the acrylic roughly, pressing my body into hers. “I couldn’t care less what you think, Alyssa.”

  She narrows her brown eyes at me. “Then why the hell are you here?”

  Because you’re easy and I need a distraction? I just want her to shut up. So I do the one thing I know will make her do just that. I lower my lips to the base of her neck as my hand goes under the water.

  * * *

  I couldn’t even get it up. I’ve never been so monumentally disappointed in my dick than in that very moment. Although, there were countless reasons why I couldn’t get aroused. The first being the fact that Alyssa kisses like a fish. I’m talking full on sucking and puckering. I shudder just thinking about it. Secondly, I had barely touched her and she was moaning like I had made her come. I could already tell she would be someone who would fake an orgasm, and I’m so not into that. Especially after being with Sophia, the queen of fake orgasms. And then to top it off, when I was kissing her, Ciera’s hurt expression from earlier kept popping into my head.

  It isn’t her fault she heard what she did, and I made her feel like shit earlier. I want to apologize, but I know she doesn’t have a cellphone. I glance at the clock on mine, and it’s not even ten yet. Maybe I can stop by her apartment for a few moments and apologize? I know I’m not thinking straight, but I’m already halfway there before I can stop myself.

  The possibility of her slamming the door in my face is very likely, but I feel like such an ass. I tell her I want to be friends, I invite her over to my house, and then I treat her like shit. World class friend I am.

  My palms are sweaty as I park my car and climb out. Maybe it’s too late? Maybe I will get her in trouble? Although these are two very good possibilities, I ignore my inner voice, and take the stairs two at a time. I stand outside her door for a good five minutes before I gain the courage necessary to knock. It is a light knock, one that shouldn’t attract attention from the fellow neighbors. I can hear footsteps inside, and after a few deathly quiet moments, I hear the lock being fumbled with before the door is cracked open. Ciera peeks her head out.

  “Topher?” she gasps out in surprise. “What are you doing here?”

  “I wanted to apologize about earlier,” I whisper. “I know it’s late, but I’ve been thinking about what a jerk I was, and I knew I couldn’t let it fester overnight.”

  She runs her hand through her short blond layers, and then steps out onto the walkway with me, closing the door behind her. She is wearing purple fuzzy pajama bottoms, and a white crew t-shirt. My eyes immediately hone into her chest, and the fact that I can now clearly see she isn’t wearing a bra. Her tits are perky and big, and suddenly, I’m feeling the arousal I was missing from earlier as the blood begins to rush between my legs.

  She folds her arms across her chest uncomfortably, and I realize maybe I was staring a bit too hard. I gulp loudly, maneuvering my eyes back to meet hers.

  “I’m listening,” she states, her body more closed off than it’s been the past week.

  I sigh. “My father’s gay.”

  She doesn’t even bat an eye. “Yeah, I kind of gathered that. And your point?”

  It doesn’t even seem to faze her. “Well, I just found out recently, and it’s been hard to adjust to.”

  She nods. “You know there is nothing wrong with being gay, right?”

  I feel like she just kicked me in the balls. “All my life I’ve thought of my father as someone I could look up to. Someone I wanted to be. And now I find out he’s been lying to me all this time.”

  She continues to take the wind out of my sails. “Just because someone is gay doesn’t make them any less of a person. You’re acting like this is all about you. I bet you haven’t even bothered to stop and think about how this has affected his life.”

  She’s right. It hasn’t even crossed my mind.

  “I—I—“ She cuts me off.

  “I wasn’t even sure what I overheard today, but I knew it was something you probably didn’t want me witness to. But the way you treated me was completely uncalled for. Sometimes Topher, you aren’t the center of the universe, and you’re going to have to come to terms with that fact. I appreciate the fact that you want to apologize, but after today, it made me realize just why people like us don’t associate with one another. We come from two completely different worlds.”

  “Ciera—“ I try again, but she cuts me off once more.

  “Maybe if we weren’t so insanely different, we would have a chance at being friends…but we have nothing in common. You come from money, I don’t. You are popular, I’m not. You are afraid of being associated with someone who loves the same sex…I’m not. I just think we should go our separate ways from now on.”

  “This feels like a break-up,” I say.

  She shrugs. “Hey, at least you didn’t entirely ruin your reputation over the past couple of weeks.”

  I try to feign a smile, but have trouble doing even that. “Ciera, I’m sorry.”

  She nods. “I know.” She spins to turn around and head back inside, when I throw my arm up to stop her.

  “You’re different. People feel uncomfortable when something different comes along. That’s why I bullied you in the past. It doesn’t excuse my actions, but I am hoping that it will help you understand.”

  She locks her blue eyes onto mine. “Thank you.”

  “Thank you?” I choke out.

  “For trying to be a better person.”

  I reach out my hand, and graze the side of her face. I have no idea what possesses me to do this, but it’s almost instinctual.

  Her eyes widen from my action, and I find myself tracing her lips with my eyes. I don’t know what it is about this girl, but there is something about her I can’t quite put my finger on.

  I don’t even think twice before I begin leaning in. It’s like my body has a mind of its own. Just as my eyes close I feel a rough slap across my cheek, which sends my eyes flying open. “What the hell?” I cry out in surprise.

  “I don’t know what kind of game you are trying to play here, but you can play it with someone else. Goodnight, Topher.” And then she closes the door in my face.