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  Landen reached for me to come to his side.

  “Do you need anything?” Ashten asked Landen.

  “Just rest, according to Jason,” Landen answered.

  “How’s Delen?” Ashten asked

  “The same. When we take Beth back, I’m going to talk to Drake to see what protection he can give them,” Landen answered. Ashten raised his eyebrows, questioning Landen. “He was with us throughout most of this,” he said, looking at me. “Since I wasn’t angry, I was able to see the man he is; I know he doesn’t want anyone to get hurt.”

  As understanding came over him, Ashten nodded. “Esterious is large, and there are several priests who would seek to rule. I’m sure Drake has a very thin line to walk,” he said.

  As a confused look came across our faces, Ashten let his hand rest on Landen’s shoulder. “The illusion of a power struggle between you and him would be better than the reality of facing all the priest Donalt has prepared for this day.”

  “Is he in danger?” I asked, prepared to make Drake come to Chara if he was.

  “If he appears weak, then he could be overthrown. He has to play the part before him; whatever alliance you’ve formed should be held secret. Delen is outnumbered, and a long road is in front of you,” Ashten explained.

  Landen nodded. Ashten then hugged him, and he and Aubrey passed through the passage.

  Landen looked down at me. “I don’t know why we didn’t see that,” he said.

  I sighed and pulled him closer. “My impatience is wearing off on you,” I teased.

  I heard him laugh under his breath. “So you admit that you’re impatient?” he asked. I nodded, remembering that was one of the first things I saw when this life appeared before me.

  Rose and Karsten approached us next, and Rose hugged me as she smiled proudly. “You don’t have to tell me what you learned; I can feel you,” she said, extending her arms to look at me.

  I smiled back and reached for Karsten. “You’re going to have to tell your friends of the Odionia that they’re wrong; Jayda’s blood runs through them. She found love, and so should they,” I said to him.

  Karsten reached his arms around me. “I stand witness to that, my dear,” he said, letting me go.

  Rose pulled Landen down to kiss his cheek before she and Karsten passed into the passage.

  Clarissa and Dane approached next; they barely glanced up at us. I felt relieved to see her in Dane’s arms again. Clarissa hugged me and Landen at the same time. “I told you everything would be fine,” she said, looking over me.

  “I don’t want the two of you to part again. What Landen and I feel is no different from the two of you; the world would mourn if your love was lost,” I said, looking back at her.

  A stunned look came across her face, and she looked up at Dane, then to Landen. “Well then, I take that as an invitation to face Mars – because Dane will always be there to protect you,” she said.

  Landen’s eyes grew serious; she knew he’d oppose her conclusion and quickly pulled Dane into the passage before Landen could utter a word.

  As he looked to where they’d vanished, Landen shook his head in disbelief. “She’s always been too adventurous us for my comfort,” he said under his breath.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Brady and Felicity approached next. Libby was holding Felicity’s hand, and Brady was cradling Allie. Libby let go of Felicity and ran to us. Landen leaned down to scoop her up, and she laughed as he raised her above his head; it was refreshing to hear it. She reached her arms out for me to come close to her.

  “Were you really there?” I asked her. She didn’t answer me; she just hugged us both as tight as she could, then let go as Brady and Felicity came to our side.

  “The others are staying a while longer,” Brady said to Landen.

  I looked into the distance and felt the emotion of bliss; all of Livingston’s family was with him - well, almost all of them.

  “It took everything I had not to go through this passage; Marc said there was a wall,” Brady said.

  Landen nodded to confirm.

  “He said he didn’t know what happened, that they all fell asleep,” Brady added.

  Landen looked at me. We hadn’t thought of what their perception of everything was; we were both just glad that they didn’t see what we saw: the demon himself.

  “We’ll talk later,” Brady said, putting his hand on Landen’s shoulder.

  I was sure that I wouldn’t be a part of that conversation. Still, I hoped that Landen would open up to Brady and vent about what he’d seen, face it, and then share it with me.

  Brady gently handed me Allie, kissing my forehead as he let her go. “You’re the bravest girl I’ve ever met,” he whispered.

  I blushed as I looked into Brady’s blue eyes; he’d never shown any kind of affection toward me. I’d always imagined he saw me as Landen’s soulmate, never just Willow.

  “I’m only brave because he loves me,” I said, looking into the blue eyes that belonged to me.

  Landen picked Libby up and led us into the passage. As the darkness came to her, Felicity smiled at me. “You seem calmer with the passage,” I said to her.

  “I’m calm because I’m going home - and I know you’ll be there,” she said as she blindly looked in my direction.

  Libby laid her head on Landen’s shoulder and closed her eyes. I looked down to my arms; Allie was staring up at me with heavy eyes. I let calm flow through my arms, then watched her drift to sleep. I felt relief and looked to see Brady staring at me.

  “She hasn’t slept in three days,” he said.

  Landen looked at Brady curiously.

  “Libby, Preston, and Allie have sat in the center of Pelhan’s front room, not sleeping, eating – nothing; we couldn’t get them to say or do anything,” Brady said.

  Felicity blindly reached to let her hand rest on Allie. “If I took Allie from Libby and Preston, she’d cry endlessly,” she said.

  “We knew you had a victory when we heard their laughter. Preston and Libby were jumping in place, and Allie was waving her tiny hands and smiling,” Brady added.

  Landen looked back at me. Hearing that didn’t make us feel any better; in fact, we were afraid - afraid that we were incapable of leading these children to any victory.

  I let the calm I was feeling continue to flow through Allie, and I felt Landen do the same with Libby. We knew how tired we were, and it was hard to imagine that their little bodies had endured with us.

  Inside Chara, I handed Allie’s sleeping body to Felicity; I felt her relief when she saw how calm Allie was. Brady let me and Felicity in the back of Landen’s Jeep, which was waiting by the passage. Landen sat in the passenger’s seat, still holding Libby’s sleeping body. I knew that Brady wouldn’t rest until he had a moment alone with Landen; he wanted to assure himself he was fine.

  I leaned between the front seats. “Can you guys take me home first? I want a hot shower,” I said, looking from Brady to Landen. Landen looked back at me as fear suddenly came through him; his memory was sharper than mine: I’d almost forgotten the illusion of blood that I’d faced in the palace.

  “We’re home,” I thought.

  Landen smiled slightly, then leaned back to kiss me. Brady drove carefully across the field. I slid back into my seat and looked at Felicity, who leaned in and whispered, “Do you need to talk to someone?”

  I shook my head from side to side. “I just need to rest,” I said, smiling slightly.

  She nodded. “I’ll come by in the morning,” she promised.

  Brady stopped at my porch, and I stepped out and leaned in to kiss Landen through his window.

  “Will you tell everyone I said goodnight?” I asked him.

  “I’m sure they’re just as eager to rest as you and I,” he thought, smiling.

  I smiled at Brady and Felicity, then turned to walk up my front steps. It was dark, but I could still see the glow of energy around the flowers of every color that decorated our house. The
door was unlocked; it always was. As I climbed the stairs, I didn’t turn on any lights. In a daze I walked to the bathroom in my bedroom.

  I stared into the mirror at my refection: my eyes had dark circles beneath them; it seemed to enhance the emerald green that was staring back me. I did feel older - not one year, millions of years. I couldn’t find the courage to turn on the shower; instead, I let the tub fill with steaming hot water. I pulled my shirt over my head and stared at the faint line that set above my heart; I could feel the scar beneath it, and the pain I felt as the blade moved through me suddenly came to me...standing there now, I had no idea how I’d found the courage to do that.

  Every moment from the time I saw Perodine wading in the water until now raced through my mind, and I felt the emotions of every intense second as if it were happening at that moment. I started to breathe harder; it felt like my chest was closing in. I tried to focus on the mirror, my image, to tell myself that I was here now, that it was over. But in my reflection, I saw Alyianna, Jayda, and all the images that I’d seen merge into my charm. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath – but calm still escaped me. I made my way to the tub and slowly slid into the steaming water, feeling it burn my skin. I then let my entire body submerge under the water.

  Underneath the water, I found the silence and peace that I’d been grasping for, and I felt my mind numb - finding peace for the first time in days. When my breath expired, I slowly rose. As my hands brushed the water from my face, I stared at my tattoo: the star Drake had placed in the center of the Ankh. His memory flooded my mind. I could have lost him; a few weeks ago I would have seen that as a victory, but that night I was selfishly glad that he was still in my life.

  I felt Landen approaching the house and pushed my thoughts of Drake away. I then sensed Landen drifting through the house and heard water running; I assumed he was showering in one of the other bathrooms. As I moved the soap across my body, my mind began to play over the last few days; this time, at peace, I could see clearly. I’d wanted so badly to have a chance to know who I was in my past lives, and that night that desire was granted. My hand settled on my charm, and the visions of all I was moving back into it gave me strength. I let the memories that Aliyanna gave me dance through my mind: growing up with Landen at my side, coming to Chara, Libby - they were so beautiful.

  My mind moved to Jayda’s life. As the memory of her touch came to me, so did the grief she felt. I tried to call back the images of her children, to see if they even slightly resembled Libby, but she’d never clearly shown them to me. My charm hummed, and her visions grew clearer to me. In my calm state, I felt every emotion she had as she traveled back to Oba, and I heard the words she said to Samilya’s children to comfort them.

  Through her eyes, I watched as maids dressed me to stand before Oba for my punishment; I felt the fear as if the moment were occurring right then and there. Jayda had never laid eyes on him before. Through her eyes, I watched as she was escorted to his throne. When the doors opened before her, I expected to see the image of Landen as Oba, but I didn’t. I moved slowly forward, gripping the sides of the tub as my memory played a lost past for me. Before me was a perfect face, the face of a king - the face of Drake. I watched as he fell and the darkness left him, just as I had days ago. My stomach turned, and heat came to my face. I was struggling to remain calm, not to alert Landen. I didn’t understand; how could he have been Oba? Oba was my soulmate; our love overcame the darkness.

  Through Jayda’s eyes, I searched every memory, looking for Landen - but he was nowhere to be seen; I realized that Jayda was not only grieving for her children, but also for not knowing Landen. As I took ownership of these thoughts, the charm on my neck warmed, and disgust for myself emerged in my soul. His memories were of me, and I’d given him every reason to believe that my soul was his. He was going to give his life for someone who never could have truly loved him.

  My mood shifted to anger; if Drake could remember our lives together, then he knew all along who he was in that life. If he’d already had victory against the demon, it didn’t make any sense to me that he’d ask me to take his life. My sympathy for him diminished. I felt betrayed; he was no different from the others that guided me and Landen - they only tell us what they want us to know.

  I grinded my teeth as the agony I lived through overcame me; I felt like I’d wasted three days of my life and put my family through torment – for nothing.

  When the water turned cold, I pulled myself out, feeling more exhausted then when I’d began. I focused on how I’d feel in Landen’s arms and pushed the anger and betrayal I felt for Drake deep inside of me. I pulled on my robe and opened the door, looking for Landen; he was sitting on the edge of our bed, holding a very small cake with one candle burning. A smile spread across my face as he walked slowly to me, humming “Happy Birthday.” I blew out the candle and reached up to kiss him.

  “Did you cook?” I thought, amused.

  He slowly pulled away from me. “I may be able to heal and make time stand still, but cooking is a gift that still escapes me,” he said, amused by his words.

  I ran my finger along the side of the warm cake, gathering as much icing as I could.

  “Your mother gave this to you. I told them that I didn’t think you wanted a party,” he said, tracing the other side of the cake with his finger.

  I knew my mother wasn’t surprised. I don’t think I can recall a single birthday party when I was growing up; I hated the attention, the intensity of the emotions. I smiled, remembering that every year my mother had appeared in my room with a small cake, humming to me. Landen had assumed that role now, and the reality that I was in his care was refreshing.

  “She gave you some inside tips to my birthday rituals, I gather,” I said.

  Landen nodded and set the small cake on the table, then reached his arms around my waist and pulled me to him. “Though, if I recall correctly, I all but had to drag you to our celebration; it wouldn’t be hard for me to assume that you wouldn’t have wanted any attention for a birthday.”

  “We were in the middle of major turmoil; a party didn’t make sense,” I said, brushing the dark, wet locks of hair from his perfect blue eyes.

  “We still are,” Landen said as he moved his hand to my face, “but we won’t stop living to worry.”

  I laid my head on his chest, hiding in his energy. I felt his hand on the back of my head, as well as the calm he was giving me. “You can’t hide your emotions from me, Willow. We are one; they belong to me as well - and pushing them down makes us weaker,” he said gently to me.

  I leaned back and looked into his perfect eyes and saw the seriousness there.

  “What did Jayda show you?” he asked.

  As a rush of adrenaline and panic soared through every part of me, Landen held me tighter, giving me all his love, his calm.

  “Oba was Drake,” he said, looking into my eyes.

  I nodded and stared at him through the glass panes of tears that I refused to let fall. “How did you know?” I whispered.

  Landen smiled slightly and let his fingers trace the dark circles under my eyes. “Anytime Drake is given the opportunity to proclaim that he’s your soulmate, he takes it – except for when Perodine told you that the darkness couldn’t live in me and that I was your soulmate. His intent was to save your life at any cost, and his emotion was full of grief - a grief that he’d already passed through in another life.” He sighed, then continued, “And when you told us that Jayda and Alyianna showed you your lives, a rush of panic came to him; it was as though he was prepared for you to scold him.”

  “I don’t understand,” I said in a weak voice.

  “Willow, I told you the day that Delen was redeemed that I didn’t care who we may have loved before; we had each other now, and that’s all that matters. We can’t change it,” he said.

  “I want to blame someone. I want to seek revenge on whoever caused Drake to live in his illusion, but these memories...they tell me it’s me, that I did
all of this to myself - and now you have to endure it with me,” I said.

  Landen let his hand fall in mine, then he pulled the covers back on my side of the bed; I gladly lay down. He was at my side, and his eyes searched over me carefully; his emotions were balanced. I didn’t understand...if I was him, I’d be jealous, angry.

  He began to trace my eyes and smiled slightly. “Why are you not angry?” I asked.

  “If I was angry, that would mean that I doubted our love, that I thought there was a chance he could take you from me. You know that doubt doesn’t live in me - not tonight, not in this life.”