The Monster Hunters

  “So that’s what you are . . .” Julie said. “You’re Frankenstein’s Monster.”

  “More than that,” Franks snorted. “I hate that book. I’m no whiner.”

  I glanced at my watch. I had about forty minutes before I had to be back to the village. “Do you know anything about the magic teleportation rope?”

  “No. But I understand his writings. Had to figure them out to stay alive. Good alchemist . . . Terrible father.”

  “It looks like he might have been the guy who built our ward stone too.”

  “Hmmm . . .” Franks frowned. That had thrown him off. “I didn’t recognize it. I remember all the doctor’s codes . . . Even the offensive ones.” His thick brow furrowed in thought as the medical team literally screwed his chest together with terrible cracking noises. My already-nauseous stomach threatened to empty. “Sir, I have an idea.”

  Myers looked up from his corner. He was holding a handkerchief over his mouth. “You can’t be serious.”

  “What are you thinking?” Julie asked. “Is there a magical way to save Owen?”

  Franks’ face was impassive as he squashed Julie’s hope. “Nothing I know can help Pitt.”

  “I know what you’re getting at. . . .” Myers stepped forward, surprised. “The wards were manufactured as focal points of reality, deadly to other dimensional creatures. Isaac Newton and the alchemists created them to protect mankind from the Old Ones and . . .” He trailed off. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying, Agent?”

  “A ward is a shield and a sword,” Franks said simply.

  Whatever he was suggesting rocked Myers, the man who had once ordered a nuclear bomb dropped on Alabama. “That could disband all cohesion!”

  “Exactly,” Franks responded. Whatever the hell that meant. Slowly he raised one big hand and held it out to me. “I can avenge you.”

  I shook his hand. He was unbelievably strong. “Kill them all.”

  Less than thirty minutes left.

  Franks, Lee, and Esmeralda were working on the magic rope. MHI and the Feds were surrounding the village just in case. I had just enough time to make a few final preparations. I was strapping on every weapon in my arsenal when Milo lifted one final item from the table.

  “This one is exactly like the one we used earlier when I fried Hood’s butt,” he explained as he pushed the sack into my hands. “You know those nasty little things kids use on the Fourth of July, the little hockey pucks that flash like a strobe light and hurt your eyes? Think of this as one of those on steroids from hell, only angrier. Don’t look at it directly, or you will go blind. Well, it is pretty close to what we used earlier, so there should be about a twenty-second flash, but I was kind of surprised that one was actually a controlled burn and didn’t just explode and roast us.”

  That made me feel particularly safe as I put the satchel over my armor.

  Milo paused awkwardly. Then he hugged me. He patted me on the back a few times before breaking away. He looked like he was going to cry. “I’ll go get the rest of your gear.”

  “Yeah, thanks, man.”

  Julie and I walked into the hall. My mind was reeling. This was the end.

  “You okay?” I asked. It was an idiotic question.

  “Of course not,” she answered. “But it is what it is.”

  We stood there for a few seconds, huddled together in silence, which is an eternity when your remaining life is measured in minutes. But we were Monster Hunters. It wasn’t like either of us hadn’t ever thought about this before. I had always figured it would have been sudden though, with no time for long good-byes. This was much harder.

  “There’s something I have to tell you,” I said softly. “In Mexico, when I talked to your mother, she warned me about the mark on your neck.” Julie stiffened against me. “She said that it was going to kill you eventually. I didn’t say anything because I was scared and I thought that she was just lying to us again . . . But with what happened last night . . .” I couldn’t help but think about the three new marks. There was something terribly wrong, and I wasn’t going to be around to help her through it.

  Julie gave me a pathetic smile. “You’ve got other stuff to worry about right now, Owen. I’ll take care of it.”

  I knew she would. Julie was strong, far stronger than me. No matter what happened, she would always find a way. That was just her nature. The year that I had known her had been the best year of my life, and I had somehow believed that it would go on like that forever. I held her tight as my heart ached.

  Unable to contain it any longer, Julie began to sob. “I’d trade with you if I could.”

  “I know . . .”

  In a little while, I would be dead and she would be alone, but I knew that she would survive. She would get on with her life without me, and someday, she would be happy again.

  And knowing that gave me the strength to go on.

  It was time.

  Hunters were standing in a line down the hallway to see me off. Everyone was somber. Julie’s grandfather saluted me with his hook. “Good luck, Hunter.” I paused in front of the memorial wall. I was going to have a plaque up there soon.

  Shit. I didn’t want to die. I wasn’t ready to have a plaque yet. This wasn’t fair. I tried to think of something memorable to say, but didn’t have the words. “Thanks, everybody. I’ll try not to let you down.” It was stupid, but it would have to do.

  My mom came out of nowhere and intercepted me. She almost took me down in a tackle. She was totally hysterical, and her accent was extra thick when she was this freaked out. “What are you doing?” She pointed at my shotgun. “Where are you going with your Abominator?”

  “Abomination,” I corrected her. “Never mind. Look, Mom, I’ve got to go after Mosh. It’s me for him.”

  “They told me you’re dying, that something poisonous bit you. Why can’t we go to the hospital?”

  “It doesn’t work like that, Mom. I have to do this.”

  She wouldn’t let go of my arm. “No! Owen, please.” Hysterical tears streamed down her cheeks. “No, son, please, no.”

  I wasn’t tough enough to do this. I grabbed my mom by the shoulders. “Listen. I’m doing what I have to do. If I had any other option, I would be doing that instead. I’m already dead, but Mosh isn’t. I’m going to get him back.”

  Then Dad was there. He took Mom in his arms and guided her away. He studied me while Mom screamed and thumped her fists into his chest.

  “I’m sorry, Dad,” I said.

  “Don’t worry. It isn’t your time yet.”

  He was delusional because of that stupid letter. But at least he was calm while he kept Mom restrained. “I love you, Dad. I love you, Mom.”

  “We’ll talk about it when you get back. Bring your brother home.”

  “I will,” I promised. I just wouldn’t be with him.

  There was a grumbling noise off to the side. Gretchen was standing there, a tiny black shape squished between the hulking Hunters. Her totem stick was in hand, dangling feathers, beads, and small animal skulls. I had no idea why she wasn’t with her people in their time of need. She spoke directly to Julie. It must have been something too complicated for Gretchen’s poor English.

  “Gretchen says we’re part of the clan too . . .” Julie seemed puzzled, trying to keep up with the rapid-fire Orcish. She actually gave a very sad little smile. “Thank you, honey. That’s really sweet.”

  “What’s she saying?” I asked.

  Gretchen switched to English. “Marry.” She shook her totem stick. “Marry. Sad to die . . . alone.” She reached into her burkha and pulled out a sheet of paper. She unfolded it. The notarized letter bore the state seal and declared that Gretchen F. Skippywife was an ordained minister in the state of Alabama.

  “She’s offering her services as a priestess of Gnrlwz,” Julie nearly choked trying to say it correctly, “the orc god of war, to perform a wedding before you go.” It took me a moment to digest. It was so absurd, so sudden, that de
spite everything else, all the fear, anticipation, and dread, I actually laughed. Julie started to giggle along with me. “You want to?”

  It was just the kind of thing that Monster Hunters would do. Even when death was staring us right in the face, we’d still give him the finger. “Yeah. Yeah, I do.”

  Julie shrugged. “Well, this isn’t how I imagined it at all . . . Do your thing, Gretchen. Grandpa, would you do the honors of giving me away?”

  The old man stepped up, proud of his granddaughter. “Of course. And I was worried I’d have to wear a tux for this . . .”

  The Hunters gathered around us in a circle, seemingly just as surprised as I was. Gretchen hissed and the crowd fell silent. Trip stood just behind me and off to the side, appointing himself as my best man. Holly, apparently, was Julie’s maid of honor, only instead of flowers, she had a .308 Vepr carbine.

  Ironically, this was the spot where we’d shared our first kiss, right under a Latin phrase warning about the dangers of fleeting glory.

  Gretchen had us get on our knees in front of the wall of memorial plaques. I took Julie’s hand. This wasn’t how I’d expected it either. My mom started to cry even harder and my dad put his big arm over her shoulder. Gretchen tapped us both on the forehead with her stick as she started grumbling something memorized and incomprehensible. She kept it brief. Orcs weren’t big on ceremony.

  I glanced over at Julie, she looked back at me, eyes shining bright. I loved her. And that one split second was exactly how I’d imagined it, and that made everything okay.

  Gretchen thumped me on the forehead with the stick. “Grok?”

  “I do.”

  Gretchen thumped Julie. “Grok?”

  She looked into my eyes. “I do.”

  Gretchen raised her stick high overhead and screamed her devotion to the god of war. It was actually almost musical. She slammed the tip of the short staff hard into the floor, the impact resonating through the entire hall. I think that was when she pronounced us man and wife. She took the stick, pointed it at my nose, and gave me an order. I didn’t understand a word that she was saying.

  “She says that it is orcish tradition that the more you love your wife, the bigger the thing you need to kill for her as a wedding night offering,” Julie translated. “She says Skippy killed a seventy-foot lindwyrm for her.” Gretchen said more and Julie giggled again. “So she bore him many sons.”

  And just like that, I was a married man. I couldn’t kiss the bride, because I was infected by a zombie, but other than that, it was actually a pretty happy moment. One of the Hunters even thought to take a picture.

  Somebody started clapping. The two of us made our way through the cheering crowd. Dorcas was at her desk. I had never seen her cry before. She blew her nose with a sound like a trumpet. “Congratulations, I guess. See you ’round, Z.” I got outside before anyone could see me completely break down. A mess of other Hunters were going to follow us to the village to provide backup. There was a car waiting.

  Trip and Holly were riding with us, of course. I held the door open for my new wife. Trip reached over and thumped me on the arm. Holly gently rested her hand on my shoulder. Trip put the car in gear and we headed for the village. “It’s been an adventure, guys,” I told my best friends.

  “It isn’t over ’til the fat lady sings,” Holly stated.

  “Why all the tears then?” I asked.

  “I always cry at weddings.”

  I stood in the spot where the last teleportation effect had taken place and checked my watch. Hood better not be late. I wasn’t feeling very well. My head had started throbbing in the car and wouldn’t stop. Cold sweat was leaking from every pore.

  The orc village was deserted. The tribe had retreated to the relative safety of the compound. A dozen Hunters had formed a perimeter around the village and were just waiting. MCB agents had massed in force at the entrance.

  My friends didn’t want to let go of me. Trip had started to babble. “Dude, we’ll be praying for you. I know that you’re going to come back. It might take a miracle, but it’s not like we haven’t seen miracles before. God’s on our side, man.”

  Holly was tougher. “Be strong, Z.”

  I stumbled away. Saying my farewells to the Amazing Newbie Squad of Yesteryear had been particularly painful. Trip was hurting. Holly was too, but she kept it bottled up behind a stoic mask. I noticed Trip starting to shudder, and Holly took his hand as they walked away.

  Now it was just me and Julie.

  “No matter what happens,” she said. “I’ll always love you.”

  “You were the best thing that’s ever happened to me, you know that, right?”

  “Yeah, I know.” She tried to smile, but failed. “I can’t . . . I don’t know what to . . .”

  “It’s okay,” I assured her. I stroked her face. My hand was trembling.

  The earth shuddered. A few feet away, flames erupted from two points in the dirt, quickly burning outward, forming a circle just big enough for me to stand in. The ground inside seemed to disappear into darkness.

  This was it.

  “I love you.” I couldn’t even kiss her good-bye.

  I broke away from Julie and stepped into the circle. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

  Chapter 19

  Now I was alone.

  I fell immediately as I entered the portal. It was as if the world just vanished, leaving me in a violent freefall. I hit the ground on my side, cracking a bunch of glow sticks. I lay there disoriented for a few seconds. Gravity seemed to be coming from a different direction, and it took me a dizzy moment to orient myself.

  The circle I had stepped through was there, but instead of being above me like it felt it should be, it was off to the left. A beam of sunlight came through the hole, like a window into a pitch-black room. Wherever I was, it was nighttime, and we were outside. There were stars in the sky, and I was no astronomer, but I could tell I was nowhere near Alabama. I lumbered to my feet. “Hood! I’m here. Let Mosh go!”

  “You’re armed I see. I expected no less from someone so stubborn, but at least I am a man of my word.” The voice of the shadow man came from all around me. “Free the brother.”

  Lights ignited atop several tall lampposts. I was on an asphalt path through an old cemetery. The mausoleums were gray and crumbling. Every path was surrounded by ornate wrought-iron fences, speckled with rust. Mosh was there, and directly behind him were two hooded acolytes. My brother was shaking, held up by the cultists. His left hand had been wrapped in a towel, but he’d already bled through it. The acolytes pushed Mosh toward the hole.

  “Dude? What’s going on?” he cried. He looked terrible, pale from blood loss.

  Relief flooded through me. At least he was still alive. “I’m trading myself for you. Go through the portal.”

  “I can’t leave you, man. These guys are nuts. They cut my fingers off! They’re going to kill you.”

  “I can take care of it. Go.”

  One of the cultists shoved Mosh. He tumbled forward and simply disappeared when he hit the hole. It closed behind him, taking the sunlight with it.

  That left just me and the crazies. Monster Hunter Solo.

  “Come with us, please,” one of the cultists said nervously, glancing at my shotgun. “The High Priest awaits.” There was a large building at the end of the path. It looked like a really cozy house, but somehow it had an industrial feel at the same time. I scanned in every direction. There were no other lights anywhere near us. Hood was nowhere to be seen. If I made a run for it, I’d die from the bite before I made it very far.

  “Does he await over there?” I nodded my head toward the building.

  “Yes, please allow us to escort you.”

  “Naw, I think I can get there myself.” I flicked off Abomination’s safety as I raised the stubby weapon. BOOM. I blasted a round of buckshot into the chest of the first cultist, then jerked the muzzle onto the next one. BOOM. Both of them went down like the sacks of crap that
they were.

  “It’s on now, Hood!” I shouted as I stepped over the bodies and walked toward the building. I was missing my honeymoon for this.

  The lights all died at once. His voice came from the air itself. “Of course. I’m impressed that you’re still able to walk. Usually by now the bitten is nearly comatose. I can see it though. The fever is burning you up. Your muscles are weakening. You’re bleeding internally. It won’t be long now.”

  I’d managed to smash most of the glow sticks by the time I reached the manicured front lawn. I activated the brilliant flashlight attached to my shotgun’s rail and swept it over the front of the building. There was a sign: mortuary.

  “Oh, that just figures,” I muttered, clambering up the steps.

  “Yes, I own twenty of these around the world, as well as several dedicated crematoriums and livestock-rendering factories. It gives me plenty of raw materials. Art supplies, if you will.”

  The double doors at the entrance were beautifully carved wood and stained glass. I smashed them open with my boot. I moved through, my shotgun light pulsing. I checked to see if the flashlight was malfunctioning, but I realized it was because of how badly my limbs were shaking. It was a nice waiting room. Large displays of flowers were set in vases under the stained-glass windows. Nothing moved in here. My illuminated green reflection bounced back from the glass.

  His voice came from just ahead of me. “Nice glow sticks. Are you going to a rave?”

  The chapel was one of those bland, nondenominational types, but with one obviously recent addition. The flashlight beam illuminated a giant golden squid idol tied to the wall. I swept the light back and forth. The room was huge and there were deep shadows everywhere. The tremors in my legs were making it difficult to move quickly. I had to pause and lean against a pew to catch my breath. Something hot and wet dripped down my face. I wiped it away, then studied my glove under the glow sticks. My nose had started bleeding.