This Alien Shore

  The door of the bridge was open, and as she came up, she could see people inside. Masada was seated at the pilot’s console, staring at it with an intensity which hinted at volumes of data being processed though his headset. Phoenix had just knelt down on the floor beside what looked like a Gueran body, with two guards behind him. On the other side of the body was the inpilot, and he was running some sort of scanning device over it. The skin beneath the kaja paint of the fallen man was a chalky gray.

  “I can try to take control of his wellseekers,” Phoenix was saying. “That might work.”

  “Too late.” The pilot shook his head grimly. “He’s gone.” Overhead on the main viewscreen a slender vein of light flickered against an ebony starscape. It looked like the ainniq she had seen near Earth, but much closer and much brighter. From here she could see that light flickered up and down the length of the fault in spurts, like the lightning in her dreamscape. Colors sputtered along its length in seemingly random patterns, sparkling as they collided with one another. It was strange and very beautiful ... and under the circumstances, not a little threatening.

  Finally she dared to ask, “What’s going on?”

  As soon as he realized she was there, Phoenix rose up and went to her. His expression was strained. “Outpilot’s dead,” he said. He put an arm around her shoulders and squeezed, as much for his own reassurance, it seemed, as for anything she needed. She could feel him trembling slightly. “So we are in very deep shit right now.”

  “I’d call that an understatement.” The inpilot grunted. “It’s sabotage, and a damn good job, too. We were hit hard and clean, no warning. The outpilot went down as soon as he hooked up. Navigation’s locked out, I can’t access a single control. Dr. Masada’s trying to reroute the signal so that we can at least maneuver.”

  Masada reached out to the control panel before him and pressed something. A moment later he cursed softly. “No. That’s locked up, too.”

  Jamisia could see the fear in the pilot’s eyes. “You have to get the helm back before we hit the ainniq.”

  She could see that the ainniq was closer now; it was possible to see veils of light shimmering about its edges, bleeding out into the black of space. They were heading straight toward it.

  Masada muttered. “Every pathway is blocked.”

  “Keep trying,” the inpilot ordered. He sat down before the controls and tried a few, then cursed as they failed to respond properly. “Less than a minute left.”

  “To what?” Jamisia whispered.

  Phoenix nodded upward toward the viewscreen, where the ainniq was rapidly growing larger. “Course was set already. If Dr. Masada can’t bypass the damaged navigational programs, we’re going in.”

  “Without an outpilot,” one of the guards added. She could hear the fear in his voice.

  It was said to be the worst death imaginable, to be eaten by the sana.

  THIRTY SECONDS TO IMMERSION, the bridge announced.

  “All right,” Masada muttered. His attention was now wholly fixed on the crippled programs feeding into his head, and he was clearly making comments to himself, not to them. “There’s the problem.”

  Sabotage. To kill her, or Masada, or Phoenix? Or all three? What a clean death it would seem from the outside, with no evidence that anything had gone wrong. A ship had gone into the ainniq. It never came out. Such things happened.

  TWENTY SECONDS TO IMMERSION.

  Computer sabotage. Neat and clean. They had probably shut down communications as well. The ship would go down without so much as a ripple in the outernet. No one would ever know what had happened.

  “Dr. Masada.” The pilot’s voice was strained. “I need helm control before immersion.”

  “If you keep interrupting my concentration,” came the answer, “you will have nothing.”

  The viewscreen was blazing with light now, the darkness of surrounding space withdrawn to the farthest edges of the display. In the midst of that brightness shadows shimmered and swayed, hinting at forms unseen, dangers unnamed.

  “Can I help?” Phoenix offered.

  Masada shook his head sharply. “It’s Guild code. I can’t let you have access to that.”

  “Even if that means we all die?”

  TEN SECONDS TO IMMERSION

  “Don’t be foolish. Not even you can hack a foreign system in ten seconds.” He shook his head in frustration. “Whoever did this knew his stuff. He also anticipated everything I would try to do to reestablish control. Damn ...”

  The viewscreen was filled with writhing colors, shapes and streamers and twisting shadows that moved too quickly to follow. Closer, it was coming closer—

  “I need the helm!” the inpilot cried. Jamisia could hear the raw panic in his voice as the ainniq moved forward to swallow them whole.

  IMMERSION, the bridge announced.

  A full set of viewscreens blazed to sudden life around them, circling the bridge with its display, 360 degrees of blazing light, surrounding them with the nightmare vision. Was it Jamisia’ imagination, or could she sense something out there, bright and hungry and winging its way toward the crippled ship? She was reminded of the queasy feeling she’d had while staring at Kent’s paintings; looking at the ainniq was like that, but a thousand times worse. Was this what he’d been trying to paint?

  It was beautiful. It was horrible. It was chaos, utter chaos, and the mind couldn’t even focus on it without feeling the boundaries of sanity give way. She turned and looked at the rear viewscreens, the space that was presumably behind them. There was no sign of the way they had come, or anything that might mark the way out. What landmarks could exist in such a place, where everything was in constant flux? They were lost, truly lost. And it was only a question of time, she knew, before one of the predators of this realm spotted them. Maybe only seconds.

  You could find the way out, an inner voice whispered.

  A looming shadow began to move toward the ship. The inpilot saw it and cringed back in his seat. “Oh, Jesus.” Phoenix’s arm tightened around Jamisia as the thing drew closer, and she could feel her own heart pounding in fear. Her wellseeker posted several warnings, and she finally just shut it down. What did it matter how fast her heart was beating, when her soul was about to be ripped from her body?

  The darkness enveloped the ship and for a moment all the screens were flooded with blood-red light ... then it passed over them, or through them, and was absorbed into the mad skyscape beyond.

  Not a dragon. Not a real one. Not anything.

  You can see the real dragons, Jamisia. If you want to.

  No, she thought back, I can’t. Only he can. The thought of the sick one taking control of her body, even for a moment, was terrifying. She couldn’t consider it. She just couldn’t.

  “All right.” It was Masada. “I’ve got the auxiliary systems freed up. That’s a start.”

  “So what? We dodge things we can’t see?” The inpilot gestured toward the display. His forehead was beaded with sweat, and it dripped down the lines of his kaja, obscuring the design. “Do you know how to fly us out of this?”

  I could do it, Raven thought. We could fly it together.

  Yes, Jamisia answered her, and then I would die. This body would live, but I would be gone forever. No!

  She could feel something coming up behind the ship again and she whirled around to look at the viewscreen. Colors boiled over one another with shadows swirling between them, a visual maelstrom in which it was impossible to focus on any one point for more than a second. Yet something was out there, she could feel it even if she couldn’t see it. Something very hungry, very powerful, and very swift. She could feel it bearing down on them, licking at the human souls within the ship, tasting their substance—

  “I can pilot, ” she whispered.

  Only Phoenix heard her, and he didn’t know enough about what was going on to understand. “That isn’t what they need.” There was fear in his voice now, cold and shaking and not at all like the Phoenix she knew.
He was used to dangers that came at him through a network of delicate circuits and threatened at most a handful of neurons, not invisible demons who hungered to rip his very soul from his flesh.

  It was said to be the most horrible death a human being could know. Did she fear that more than she feared what was inside her? She drew in a deep breath and tried to not to let the fear resonate in her voice as she said it again, more loudly. “I can pilot.” Still no one responded to her, so she added, almost angrily, “I can see them, damn it!”

  “You’re a Terran,” the inpilot snapped.

  Masada said, “You don’t even know what that means.” Then he shut his eyes for a minute to concentrate on something internally. “Almost there....”

  “I know what it means,” she said. When no one responded, she persisted with single-minded stubbornness, “It’s a sickness. It lets you see the sana, but it destroys everything else in the mind. Right?”

  The pilot turned and stared at her.

  So did Masada.

  The hunter was close, so close. She could feel it. There was no time left. Why couldn’t these people understand? “I have it, ” she told them. It infuriated her that now that she had finally decided to risk her very existence for them, they were too stupid to take her up on it. “I have the disease. I can see them. ”

  Finally Masada seemed to get the message. “Go,” he said, nodding dismissal to the guards. He pointed to Phoenix. “And take him with you.”

  The hacker started to protest, but the guard who grabbed his arm would hear none of it. “You’re not Guild,” Masada said as they dragged him out. “It’s for your own protection.”

  When the last guard had passed through the door, it hissed shut, leaving Jamisia, Masada and the inpilot alone.

  God, what am I doing, this is crazy....

  There is no other way, Raven whispered, and Verina agreed, it’s that or die.

  We’re with you, Katlyn promised.

  All of us, Derik agreed.

  All but one....

  “How?” the inpilot demanded. “How can you do this?”

  She met his eyes with a fierce but frightened gaze. “Does it matter? If I say I can see them, do you really care how?”

  “This isn’t the time to argue.” Masada’s voice was cool and even, a perfect counterpoint to the inpilot’s fear and her own incipient panic. “If what she says is true, then we stand a chance. If not, we die. And if we don’t try anything ... we die.” The dark eyes focused on her. “There’ll be time later to ask questions.”

  “Of course,” she whispered.

  Oh, God, help me, please....

  Down, down into her soul she reached, down to that dark place where the youngest Others huddled, into those secret recesses where Others went to escape each other. Down past there, to places so secret she barely knew they existed.

  Jamisia. An icon appeared before her. Use this.

  She flashed a confirmation and saw data begin to scroll in her field of vision. Line after line after line of unknown code swam before her eyes, without a single icon for identification. “I don’t know what this is—” she began to protest, but Raven’s calm voice sounded in her brain. I do. Pilot’s code. Trust me. Someone started to speak to her again, but she waved them to silence. “It’s all right.” Raven was trained for this. Raven knew.

  With a sick feeling in the pit of her stomach she focused inwardly once more. She was vaguely aware that Raven was feeding instructions to the outship, allowing it to tie her into the helm control programs, but that seemed like it was a universe away. Another world, peopled by souls unconnected to her own.

  She runs across the rain-soaked grass, crying out for him. Does he have a name? Would he answer if she called it? The rain is so heavy she can hardly see. She has to find him!

  The sky is black with storm clouds, and icy water beats down upon her. The wind is so powerful that it knocks her off her feet, and she lands heavily on the muddy earth. No! No, she has to keep going! She struggles to her feet again, mud dripping from her hands and knees. He’s always been here, every time she came to this place. He must be here now!

  She screams out for him, but her voice is drowned out by the rising wind. “Take it!” she yells. “Take it! It’s all yours! They need you more than they need me... !”

  Tears run down her face and are immediately washed away by rain. Tears of fear, or of remembered pain? She staggers forward, heading toward a nearby rise where the faint glimmer of stars has broken through, revealing something huddled on the ground. As she gets closer, she can see him there, lying on his side, curled up in terror. She stumbles to him and drops to her knees by his side, weeping in terror. “Come on, ” she urges. Voice lost in the wind. “Come on, we need you. ” She hesitates, then chokes out, “I need you. ”

  The pale head lifts, the hollow eyes meet her own. Such pain in those eyes, such terrible pain! She has to fight the urge to look away, to save herself. “Come on, ” she whispers. “Come back with me.” She can feel herself being drawn toward him, sucked in by the emptiness within his soul. It takes all her strength not to fight it. Did she ever think she was alone? She didn’t know what loneliness was!

  Her tutor is standing over her. She can hear him trying to warn her. No good, no good. The sana are coming, don’t you know that? The dragons feast on human souls, and I have so many souls to give them....

  Didn’t they know that to bring her on this ship would draw the dragons? Didn’t they understand that the sheer wealth of souls in her flesh would be a delicacy too rare to resist?

  “They’ve come for me!” he burst out. He could see them now surrounding him, hiding behind the bursts of color, hunger burning red along their bodies, and one was moving in, gold light blazing along its path, sparks of shadowy hatred disguising its length—

  “It’s there!” he screamed. It was coming at them fast, so fast, why couldn’t they see it? He could see all the colors drawing together in front of it, scattering in its wake, could feel the pressure of its mind on his own. More and more of the creature was becoming visible now, as his sight picked it out from the roiling background. Those blue shapes there, that was all part of it, and the gold part beneath was what gave it the power to move, and now there were more coming in from behind, each with its own color and form—

  “Now! he screamed. “Go!”

  —and all of it was alive, he saw, everything out there had its own consciousness, its own hunger. The vista that had seemed bizarre only moments before was now revealed for what it truly was, a jungle teeming with life, vicious and hungry life. How could anything human survive here? It was alien, too alien; human beings didn’t belong in such a place.

  He saw the navigational menu appear before him and then disappear. She was taking control of the ship now, the dark one. Translating his visions into motion. What if she got it wrong? What if she chose to feed him to the sana, to sate their hunger so they would leave her alone? There were two men on the bridge, what if they chose to throw him out the air lock to save themselves? He saw one taking a step toward him and backed away hurriedly; his back slammed into the emergency door. “Stay away!” he screamed. “Stay away from me!”

  Where are they? a voice in his head prompted. Look!

  The outship’s programs fed the viewscreen images right into his head. He could see the dragons all around him now, layers upon layers of them, colors shifting and shapes evolving and hunger a red tongue that lashed out between clouds of hate. Beneath his feet the ship moved suddenly and he fell to his knees; the vision was jarred out of his head for an instant. Lost, lost, they were all lost! Did they think they could run from such creatures? The sana were everywhere, all but invisible, always hungry ... with a gasp he let the viewscreen’s images fill his brain again so that he could seek them out. There, there was one, winding its way slowly toward the ship, shifting its colors as it went! Move away from it, quickly! And that one there—that could sense the grav web, so shut it down, shut it down!

&nb
sp; They were gathering in a pack now, and he knew that they were intelligent, and they were aware of him, and they were focused on his destruction. The ship didn’t even matter to them anymore; he, he was their enemy, the focus of all their malevolence. A pack of them came together off the rear of the outship and started to move in; he cried out a warning and felt the ship lurch in response. He could hear the dragon’s laughter as they chased him, creatures of color and shadow placing bets on how long it would take them to catch him, exchanging plans of what they would do with his soul when they did. Speed, he needed more speed! Clouds of silver and scarlet parted to reveal creatures of silver and scarlet. One came toward the ship with a chromatic roar, the gold of pure hunger blazing from its surface as it lunged toward them. He ordered the ship into an evasive maneuver that left it lost in a boiling cloud of orange mist.

  There, up ahead. What was that? A thin black line, almost hidden behind clouds of fire. What was it? Someone was saying something to him, but he could no longer understand their language. He had become something without speech, a creature of speed and fear and silent vision. Moments later words were placed in his head by her, the pilot, and because she was inside him he understood. That’s the ainniq. Follow it. You can’t exit safely until we find a node.

  Follow it? Didn’t the dark one understand that the dragons knew where he wanted to go, that they were gathering at the ainniq, waiting for the outship to come to them? She must not be an ally of his after all, but some kind of servant of theirs. He’d been tricked, they’d all been tricked....

  A cold tongue licked at his brain. Alien, malevolent. Hungry. With a gasp he fed instructions to the ship, trying to get away from it. The sana followed, its substance spread out across the miles, across a thousand hues of light. He could feel it in his head as he directed the ship, sharp teeth ripping at the substance of his mind, trying to yank it loose from his flesh.