Unwritten Rules
“This is hard, Red. I don’t know what to say to them, except repeat that I’m sorry,” he uttered.
“I’m pretty sure they don’t want that,” I pointed out.
“You have to show them who you are now. Who Jonah is, not Ben. Your family deserves to know the real you.”
He gave a low moan and dragged me onto his lap, tucking the blanket back around us. When he spoke, his lips caressed my ear, eliciting the shiver I was becoming accustomed to.
“How do I go back? Where do I start?”
“You take one step at a time. You can do this.
They love you. After they see what you’ve done for yourself, they’ll love you even more.” I grinned when he kissed my neck. “Your mom will be so proud when she sees your novels. Quinn will go crazy when he hears you play.”
“Damn, Red, it’s no wonder I fell so hard for you. I was powerless to your persistence.”
“There you are! We were beginning to think you’d both run away.”
Our heads spun toward the door as Jonah’s mom walked closer to the bench.
“You two shouldn’t be out here. It’s far too cold,”
she pointed out. “Ben, Tom has taken your suitcases to your old room. Why don’t you go and help him? I’d like to get to know Elle.”
Jonah nodded as I slipped off his lap. He kissed me tenderly, whispering his love before going inside. I smiled when he touched his mom’s hand as he walked by then reaching back down for my mug. I needed something to do, something to divert my attention from the force of Mrs. Samuels gaze.
“You don’t need to hide out here.” She patted my knee, sitting down next to me and smoothing her hair away from her face.
“You all needed the space. This situation is difficult enough as it is, without me interfering, Mrs. Samuels.”
“It’s Emily, and without your interference, my boy wouldn’t have returned home.”
I tried to interject, but she held a finger up and continued. “For years we’ve tried to get Ben -sorry, Jonah, to come home. He steadfastly refused. It was Quinn’s idea to refuse the checks. He thought that would anger him enough to at least get a phone call. It worked, but it was you that brought him home. For that I will forever be thankful.”
I nodded, though I didn’t fully agree. Jonah had to do the hard part, I’d just been there to support him along the way. I debated for a moment, wondering if I should ask the question playing on the tip of my tongue. Emily nodded anticipating my curiosity.
“Have you really forgiven him? There were no recriminations from me when Jonah first confessed. I saw it for what it was, although it wasn’t my son that he hurt. I’m sorry to be so blunt. I love him. I can’t stop the need to protect him. He’s been raw for so long, Emily. I just want to help.”
Her hand fluttered to her throat, and she began toying with the locket on her necklace. She hadn’t expected me to be so straight forward, but there was no way I was hiding when it came to Jonah. He was my future. I refused to let anything else scar him.
“I’m glad my son has you. You’ll take good care of him, I see that.” She took a deep breath, “I did blame him at the start, and so did Tom. We were so consumed with making sure Quinn was okay that we ignored B- Jonah. In some ways, I think that helped Tom and I process the accident, but by the time we could tell him that he was forgiven, he’d run away.” Her voice cracked; guilt swirled low in my stomach.
“I can’t imagine-”
“You’re right, you can’t imagine. After everything settled down, and Quinn was back home, we felt the loss even more. We kept his room exactly the way it was the day he left. In fact, he’s probably looking through everything now. So, to answer your question, yes, we have really forgiven him. We can see that he isn’t the same impetuous boy he once was. We’ve all moved on, forged a new path. It would be wonderful if that included my son and you, of course.”
“He misses you,” I added. “But it may take some time for him to admit that. I fought for quite a while before he opened up to me.”
“Thank you, again,” she smiled, before standing.
“You should go to him. I think he may need you. There are a lot of memories up in that bedroom.”
I wrapped the blanket tighter around myself and shuffled across the porch. Emily took the mug from my hands and opened the door.
“I can see why my son fell in love with you, Elle.
You’re just what he needs.” She kissed my cheek, before disappearing inside.
I took a moment, preparing myself for what I might find in Jonah’s bedroom. Once I made it up to there, I got a pleasant surprise. Jonah and Quinn were looking through what appeared to be one of his graphic novels. They were chuckling as Jonah gave him the synopsis of the plot. I didn’t want to intrude so took a step back.
“Hey, don’t go!” Quinn shouted, elbowing his brother. “Your girlfriend’s gonna bail, J.”
Jonah smiled, the kind that flashed his dimples as he held his hand out to me. The frown lines between his brows had disappeared. He oozed happiness.
“Red,” he breathed, setting my skin alight.
Just one word from his lips had the ability to make me swoon, especially when it was uttered in that tone. I entwined my fingers with his, squealing when he hauled me closer.
“You guys need to get a room,” Quinn grumbled.
“We do,” Jonah snorted. “This is my room.”
Jonah hugged me as Quinn grew serious, “Is it? I mean, after you’ve gone will this room stay empty for another ten years?” He didn’t sound harsh, just protective of his family, of his heart. It reminded me of how Jonah was in the beginning.
Jonah hooked Quinn’s pinkie, and his answer was soothing. “I’m not running away this time, buddy. I’m here.
Everything is going to be just fine.”
I snuggled closer to Jonah, humming with contentment when he kissed my cheek.
He was right, everything was going to okay.
“Was that some kind of rite of passage?” I asked, looking down at Jonah.
The grin I got in response was huge, spreading from ear to ear and lighting up his face. “What passage would that be?”
“Sex with your girlfriend in your childhood bed,” I pointed out.
He lifted his hips, inducing a soft sigh from my lips, as his erection pressed against my sex.
I was straddled across his hips, still breathless from our love making. We were holding hands, our fingers entwined and our eyes locked. We were in our own little world, and for once, we were both happy.
Though Jonah and his family had much to work through, the initial meeting had gone better than expected.
Tom and Emily’s reassurance that they held no animosity toward him made the situation easier. They’d spent the entire evening questioning him about the last eleven years.
Quinn was a different story.
After the initial excitement, he had become reserved and sometimes snappy with Jonah. Both of them were doing their best to mend the broken bond. It was naïve to think that after so many years, after all the scars, everything would go smoothly. Time and patience would be imperative from this point on.
“Well, considering I never thought I’d ever come back here, then I would say I’m allowed that passage. Don’t you?” He wiggled his brows and flipped us over so that my back was flat on the mattress. He hovered over me, peppering my face with hot kisses until I squealed.
“Shush,” he whispered. “You’ll wake everyone up.”
He rolled my nipple, and I had to stifle a moan. I batted his hand away, giggling and calling him a tease.
“You weren’t exactly quiet earlier when you arrived.”
“Arrived? You mean when I came? Cute, Red, very cute.”
My cheeks began to flame as I flushed with mortification. “Oh, God, do you think they heard? Damn, that’s really disrespectful, Jonah.”
I tried to move out from under him. He held me firm, trying to talk me down from my bout of emb
arrassment. “We were quiet, not that it matters, because I heard them leave about an hour ago.”
I slapped his chest and rolled out from under him.
“You’re an evil tease, Jonah Quinn!”
I could hear his chuckle, but my back was turned. I was sat on the edge of the bed, grabbing for my robe on the floor. I felt him approach seconds before he murmured into my ear.
“Happy birthday, baby.”
I spun, jarring my nose against his chin. We both winced, rubbing the sore skin.
“W-what did you...? How did you know?”
He grinned, still rubbing his chin. It created a rasping sound as his fingers flicked against the coarse stubble. His eyes were glinting playfully, giving him a child-like appearance.
“Your mom. She knew you wouldn’t tell me.”
“You’ve got enough to deal with. I didn’t think it was all that important in the grand scheme of things.”
Jonah moved his hand to my face, his thumb stroking my jaw. “To me, everything about you is important.
Now,” he paused then jumped off the bed and began rummaging through his suitcase. I drank in the sight of his naked ass, fighting the urge to drool. “Do you want your present?”
“Oh, Jonah.”
“Don’t tell me I shouldn’t have, because that’s garbage. I love you and I get to spoil you on your birthday if I want. So stop pouting.” He placed a quick kiss on my lips and pushed something into my palm. “Now, open your gift.”
I opened my hand, taking in the small, black velvet box that he’d placed there. My heart began to pound fiercely. My blood pressure shot through the roof. This couldn’t be what it looked like; I refused to believe it.
“J-Jonah,” I stuttered.
He said nothing, just continued to look at me, watching my reaction. So with trembling fingers, I pried the box apart, letting out a squeak as I revealed what was inside. It was a ring; simple, yet utterly beautiful ring. A thick, white gold band held one small diamond placed in the center of the ring.
“It’s not what you think,” he stated, taking it from the box. “Well, at least not yet it isn’t.”
I frowned at him, confused. It could only be one thing, couldn’t it?
Jonah took hold of my right hand and started to place the white gold band on my ring finger.
“One day, when I’m better, when I don’t need half of the medicine cabinet to get through the day, I’m going to move this ring onto your other hand. I’ll do it the right way then, but for now I want you to know how much I love you. I want to show you that sticking with me through all of this is worth it.”
I whimpered.
“Oh, God, I’m messing this up, aren’t I? I shouldn’t have given it to you, not until I meant it. I’m sorry, so sor-”
I pressed my lips to his, kissing him with ferocity.
His arms banded around mine, pulling me as close to his body as he could. We toppled back onto the mattress and communicated every emotion we felt through touches, kisses, and soft sighs. His thumb skimmed the ring on my finger. He lifted it between us, his eyes darting from my hand to my face.
“You didn’t mess it up. I’m stunned.”
“Should I have left it until I meant it, until I could ask you the right way?” Jonah asked worried.
“You did ask in the right way,” I responded, skimming my hand down his bare back. “It took me by surprise.”
“It was supposed to,” he snorted.
He kissed my shoulder, and then began nibbling on my collarbone. I started squirming. We both froze when we heard laughter shortly before the front door slammed shut.
“We had better get up,” I grumbled, only to have Jonah push lustfully between my legs.
“Getting up sounds like a perfect idea.”
I pushed him off me and tugged on my robe.
“You’re as bad as a pubescent teenager. Come on, let’s go and help your parents get ready for the party.”
Jonah flopped back, his hands behind his head.
The evidence of his desire making itself known.
“Sure you don’t want to come back to bed, baby?”
I let out an involuntary moan, but shook my head, promising I’d make him pay for taunting me. As I walked to the shower, I could hear him laughing to himself. I looked down at my right hand as I turned on the hot water and felt panic jolt through my body.
I had the sudden urge to call my mom but wasn’t sure how I’d explain the situation with the ring to her, so I opted to call J.J. I sat on the edge of the tub, pouring my heart out to my friend. For once, she wasn’t dismissive.
During the phone call she helped me realize I was most likely overwhelmed by the event s of the past several weeks. That just like Jonah, I need time to process all of the changes.
Jonah startled me with a tap on the door as I dried myself off…only when I opened it, it wasn’t Jonah…It was Quinn.
“Can I talk to you before the party?” He questioned.
I agreed, but needed to get dressed, so I told him to wait on the porch for me. I knew he wanted to talk about Jonah.
When I walked out onto the porch, Quinn was waiting in the far corner. He had a dark blue blanket covering his legs along with fingerless gloves on his hands.
He clutched a mug of what smelled like hot chocolate. He had slicked his curls back from his face; his hair now darker and shinier than before. He was also sporting a scowl I hadn’t been privy too before, so I approached with caution.
“Quinn?”
“Hey, could you sit down. I just wanted to talk to you.”
I wrapped my cardigan tighter around myself and moved over to the bench. Quinn didn’t start to speak until I had taken a seat.
“I want to tell you that I’m trying. I’m finding it difficult watching you two, but I am working through it.”
“I thought you and Jonah were doing okay?”
He gave a shrug. “We were, are, but seeing the way he is with you makes dealing with this,” he hit the wheel of his chair, “more difficult.”
“I don’t understand.”
He took a sip of the hot chocolate and stared out across the garden. I noticed the skin was darker underneath his eyes, as if he’d had little sleep last night.
Jonah being here was already taking its toll on his brother.
“It’s difficult for you to really grasp it,” he started, breaking into my thoughts. “I’m still a kid, but there is stuff I think about. Things I can’t help but think about.”
I nodded in understanding but waited to speak, because he wasn’t finished.
“The future scares me, Elle.” His voice became low, and he hid his face from me. “No one is going to love me the way you love my brother.”
My heart clenched; my stomach sank, and I reached out to take his hand. “Quinn, I’ll be honest because there’s no point in lying to you. It’s true finding someone may be harder than most, but once you find that person she’ll love you no matter what. The chair will be of little significance. I assure you.”
“That’s what Mom says.”
“She’s right,” I replied, stroking his arm. “You’ll see. I know it’s not my place to tell you what to do, Quinn, but talking to Jonah might help. He has more insight regarding this than you realize.”
He nodded, but I didn’t think he believed me. I decided to change the topic in the hope that he would brighten up.
“Have you seen your brother’s tattoos? The one on his side is a copy of his comic book character.”
Quinn inhaled sharply, before bursting into laughter.
“What?” I smiled, his laugh was infectious.
“Jonah wouldn’t be happy with you calling them comic books. They’re graphic novels.”
I held my hands up in surrender, still giggling at his reaction when I felt someone behind me. Fingers interlaced with mine. I sighed, relaxing into him. When he spoke, his words rumbled through me. I shivered decadently.
“Are you flashing your birt
hday present around already?” He muttered loud enough for Quinn to overhear.
“It’s your birthday? Does Mom know?” Quinn questioned, already starting to twist his chair around.
Jonah nodded. “I just told her. She’s not happy that she didn’t know before. She’s asked for your mom’s number so that she can make sure she has all the relevant dates, for future reference of course.”
“She what?” I responded somewhat hysterically.
“Don’t panic, but to be honest, you’ll need to get used to my mom wanting to know things about you. She’s only skimmed the surface.”
He backed me up against the side of the house, his hands cupping my face, as he uttered softly, “And so have I.”
Quinn sniggered, before rolling his chair into the house. We heard him yell out for his mom. I grinned, but sobered when my eyes met Jonah’s.
“Is Quinn okay? He’s been somewhat short with me. I mean, I expect it, really I do, but I thought maybe-”
I stopped his ramble by placing my finger across his lips. “Quinn will be just fine. Thing is, he needs his big brother. He needs someone to talk to about what he’s feeling. I’m certain you’ll be able to help him. This could help move your relationship forward. Your parents will feel more comfortable if you guys are getting along.”
“Thank you,” he exhaled, nuzzling my neck. “This whole situation was easier with you. Damn, who am I kidding? It wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t met you.
From that first day I saw you, I knew you were different. I knew you were special.”
“Is that why you avoided me?”
He kissed the skin beneath my earlobe, his chest pushing against mine. My right hand was on his shoulder, and the light glinted off the diamond.
“I avoided you because you scared the hell out of me! I was stupid. Forgive me?”
He shot me a sad puppy look, but the dimple on his right cheek gave him away.
“You’re not sorry at all!” I spluttered, giving a weak shove to his chest.
His arms tightened around me, whispering his next words into my ear, “I am sorry, because time has been wasted. I’ve done that with you and with my family. I’m not doing it anymore. Elle, I love you.”