Wishing for Us

  A half hour passed and by then he was beyond worried. He was at the point of calling the police and every hospital in town when he decided to drive by her apartment. He’d only been there once, but he still remembered the location. In fifteen minutes, he was blowing out a breath in relief when he spotted her car parked in front of her unit. On the heels of that came anger. Why in the world had she come here without saying anything to him? Didn’t she know that he’d be worried? She was hours late now and couldn’t be bothered to make a simple phone call?

  By the time he reached her door, he was pissed. Why would she suddenly after weeks of living together decide to come home on the day they’d decided to move forward with their relationship? If she’d had second thoughts, shouldn’t she have at least had the courtesy to call him? Hell, even a text would have been better than nothing.

  Filled with righteous indignation, he pushed the doorbell once, then a second and third time just to release some of his frustration. After what felt like hours, but was probably just several minutes, he heard someone moving in the apartment. He could imagine her looking out the peephole now, so he glared into the small circle. A bit of an asshole move, but whatever.

  There was a click as the deadbolt disengaged and then he was staring at a very disheveled—and dirty?—Lydia. His anger was temporarily forgotten as he gawked at the normally immaculate woman before him. This was certainly a new side to her. He’d heard of letting your hair down or vegging out as forms of relaxation, but this look took that to a whole new level. He found himself shifting uncomfortably on his feet as she stood there staring up at him. Stop gawking and say something! “Er . . . I was worried about you when you didn’t come home.” God, I hope that’s just mud on the front of her dress.

  Snorting, she turned around and walked off but left the door open in her wake. After all these weeks together, I find out she’s insane? Jacob warily closed the door and followed behind her. It felt a bit like venturing into a rabbit hole, but he bravely soldiered on. When they reached her bedroom, she flipped on a light and he was disturbed to see that the dirt on her clothing also extended to her bed. By this point, he was beginning to have crazy thoughts that possibly his sweet wife was an ax murderer on the side. He was so intent on piecing together the puzzle that she presented that he almost missed her angry words. “You didn’t look as if you were too concerned earlier with Chris glued to your side.”

  Come again?

  Confused, he asked, “What are you talking about? I’ve been trying to figure out where you could possibly be for the last hour.”

  Pointing to the bedside clock, Lydia snapped, “Exactly! You didn’t even notice that I was almost two hours late getting home, Jake. Didn’t you think it would maybe take something major for me to miss our date? But when I get home, there you are with Chris looking as if you had no clue I even exist.”

  “Wait a minute,” Jacob grappled to catch up. “You’re saying you did come home, but you what—left when you saw that Chris and Casey were there?”

  She put her hands on her hips looking equal parts irate and—hurt? He’d been so focused on her bizarre appearance that he’d almost missed that. In all honesty, he couldn’t remember Chris being unusually close to him tonight. He’d recognized that she was more pleasant than usual, but like any guy, he just thanked his lucky stars when a normally bitchy woman was actually passably friendly. Hell, she could have probably humped his leg in the kitchen and he wouldn’t have noticed. Chris simply wasn’t on his radar in that way any longer.

  Then the absolute worst thing for a man to face began to happen and he looked on helplessly as big tears rolled down Lydia’s dirty cheeks. “I missed his birthday, and I never realized until his mother told me. Then I rushed there to be with him and to say I was sorry. I was so upset that I lost track of time. I needed you to hold me. But when I got home, I saw Chris’s car. Then she was plastered all over you and you both looked so happy laughing at your daughter. I was the miserable outsider, and I couldn’t take that. I was so mad at you when I left for not caring enough to wonder where I was. You didn’t call to check on me when I was late. You didn’t miss me at all. Now, standing here, I realize how stupid that all sounds because I’m just your rent-a-wife,” she sobbed.

  Fuck me, Jacob thought dazedly. First of all, he could barely make sense out of her statements. She’d talked so fast that the sentences had run together. Whose birthday did she miss? Rent-a-wife? Shit! A conversation like this was unchartered territory for him. He’d pretty much avoided and made a mess out of the relationship talk just twenty-four hours earlier. Now, his wife stood before him obviously needing some type of reassurance and an explanation as to why he’d made a fucking mess out of their first date night. And he hadn’t a clue as to what to say or how to defend himself. Plus, he was still seriously lost on the first part of her explanation. With a sigh, he decided to do the same thing he would do for Casey when she started crying. He stepped forward and put his arm around her shaking shoulders before ushering her toward what he hoped was her bathroom and not the closet. “Shhh, let’s get you cleaned up, sweetheart,” he murmured against the top of her head. Yep, definitely a twig in there, he thought as something poked his lips.

  He closed the lid on the toilet seat and motioned for her to sit there while he looked through a nearby cabinet until he found a washcloth. He watched her in the mirror above the sink while he ran enough water to thoroughly saturate the cloth. Then he returned to where she was waiting and dropped to a knee in front of her. She seemed riveted by his movements as he carefully cleaned first her face and then the slim line of her neck. She’d stopped crying by this point and now just looked drained. “Thank you,” she whispered huskily as he made one last careful pass over her cheeks before tossing the rag in what he thought was her laundry basket.

  Now to tackle the clothing. Where has she been? Even as he wondered, he didn’t want to voice the question now that she’d stopped crying. She still appeared entirely too vulnerable, and he didn’t want to say the wrong thing. Instead, he pulled her gently to her feet and located the zipper on the back of her dress. She offered no resistance as he removed her soiled clothing until she stood before him in nothing but a pair of tiny blue bikini panties and a matching bra. He grabbed another cloth and made quick work of giving her a sponge bath before wrapping her in a towel. She snuggled into his chest as he pulled her against him. “There, all better,” he whispered. At that point, he knew he had two choices. Put her in his truck and take her home or change her bedding and stay here for the night. She was as docile as a child now, and he knew she would do whatever he wanted without argument. One thing was certain, though—he damn sure wasn’t leaving her. In the end, she pointed out the location of her clean sheets and he remade the bed before stripping his clothes off and following her under the now clean linens. He took a second to grab his phone from where he’d left it on the bedside table and sent a quick text to Mark letting him know that he’d found Lydia and would talk to him tomorrow. He then moved closer to her and they settled in the center of the bed on their sides with him spooning her from behind—a position they normally slept in most nights now.

  Jacob knew by the yawns that she was close to going to sleep and he’d already decided that they could talk about whatever the hell had happened tomorrow. So he was surprised to hear her speak in a voice that sounded close to alert. “I forgot Brett’s birthday. Since he died, his mother and I have gone to visit his grave on that day. Only this year, I didn’t call her to make the arrangements or even acknowledge it because it completely slipped my mind. She was waiting when I left the office this afternoon. She was worried that something had happened to me.”

  “So you went to the cemetery,” Jacob guessed, although he still had no idea how she’d gotten so dirty there.

  He felt her nod against his chest before she replied, “I did. I was so rattled that I couldn’t think of anything else but getting there and apolog
izing.” She paused before adding, “I’m sure you think that sounds strange since Brett is dead, but . . .”

  Pulling her closer, Jacob said sincerely, “There isn’t a right or a wrong way to grieve, sweetheart. He was the man who shared your life with you for so long. Of course, it would be upsetting to realize you’d forgotten something that you normally wouldn’t have. But that doesn’t mean you forget how much he meant to you. You’re human, Lydia, like the rest of us. And you’ve had a lot of changes in your life recently. Don’t beat yourself up that something got past you.”

  The room was silent for a while as she appeared to mull over his words. Either that or she’d fallen asleep. “I was hurt and jealous when I came home and saw you and Chris looking so cozy. I wasn’t in a good place after visiting Brett’s grave, and I guess I was expecting comfort and concern from you. When I found you laughing instead, seemingly without a care in the world, I ran. Which seems terribly childish right now, but at the time made perfect sense to me.”

  Jacob shifted her in his arms until they were face-to-face then he laid his lips upon hers. He kissed her slow and deep, taking languid sips of the sweet nectar of her distinctive taste until he felt his cock begin to take an interest in what was going on. Down, boy. This was about giving comfort, not sex. She’d had an emotionally devastating evening, and he wanted to hopefully show her through actions how much he’d come to care about her. Of course, his dick was more than willing to express its keen fondness as well, but he pushed his own urges aside to continue worshipping her soft lips. Finally, he pulled back to lay his forehead against hers. Both of them were breathing as if they’d just run a race, and he knew if he didn’t stop now, he’d be inside her in another minute. “I’m sorry I lost track of time, sweetheart. But it certainly had nothing to do with anything romantic between Chris and me. This may make me sound like a jerk, but I couldn’t even tell you where she was standing in relation to me any of the time that she was there. Casey had my complete attention. The only thing I did notice was that Chris was less disagreeable this time than she normally is. That’s it—period. I was fixated on Casey’s enthusiasm about her new gymnastics class, and I didn’t realize how late it had gotten until they left. As soon as it occurred to me, I was worried and I began looking for you. When you check your phone again, you’ll find missed calls and messages from me as well as Crystal. I called her when I couldn’t locate you.”

  “Really—you did?” Lydia asked, sounding so relieved that he felt like an even bigger asshole. She’d lost her fiancé to cancer three years earlier and hadn’t been involved with a man since then. Of course she would be uncertain in a new relationship in ideal circumstances. But considering how they’d ended up getting married, was it any wonder that she’d been so unsure of the fact he’d be concerned for her?

  “Lydia, of course I immediately began hunting for you. And as far as the wife rental comment, I hope you don’t really feel that way. I thought we decided earlier today that we were both ready to be a couple in the real sense of the word. Not that I’m saying that we haven’t since we got married, but I’m committed to moving forward. I know that dealing with Chris is a lot to ask, and as Casey’s mother, she isn’t going away. Can you handle that?”

  “Jake, of course,” she answered without hesitation. “I know my actions earlier might lead you to believe otherwise, but I hope you’ll understand that they really had very little to do with Chris and more to do with my being upset over Brett.”

  Rubbing her back soothingly, he said, “I understand. Just please don’t do that again. If you need space, let me know you’re coming here. And I promise I’ll be more considerate in the future and more aware of what’s going on around me. It’s been so long since I’ve been involved with someone that I’ve possibly forgotten how to be that man.”

  Shocking him since she usually let him make the first move, Lydia dropped her hand and cupped his cock. He was still at half-mast from their kiss, and after only an embarrassingly few strokes, he was hard as steel. “I think you have a lot of potential to be just the man I need,” she purred as she continued to stroke him through the boxer briefs he’d left on.

  “Honey, I am trying to be nice tonight and let you get some rest after your rough evening. But if you keep doing that, my good intentions are going to be shot to hell.”

  “I think your cock is just the cure that I need,” she murmured as her grip tightened.

  Fucking hell, I tried, he thought as he moved to his back. His plan was to swing her over his hips and have her ride him. But Lydia seemed to have other ideas. She pushed his hands away and tugged his briefs down, releasing his heavy cock. She encircled his girth with one hand and began lightly, almost teasingly, pumping him. “Suck me, baby,” he grunted out as his hips moved restlessly against her hold.

  Clicking her tongue, she said, “All in good time, Jake.” Then the minx proceeded to drive him halfway out of his mind with darting licks to his length while she massaged his balls. Just as he thought he couldn’t take it anymore, she engulfed him in her mouth, letting him slide down the back of her throat. God in heaven, did she have no gag reflex? Then she swallowed around him and he lost it. Normally, he’d always warn a woman before coming in her mouth, but there simply wasn’t time. He was shooting his load down her throat for what seemed like five fucking minutes. She eased him out some, probably so she could breathe again, but it had already been the best blowjob of his life. Apparently, she agreed because she hummed her approval while wrapping her lips tightly around the sensitive head of his cock. And sweet Christ, he shot another load into her mouth.

  “Lydia! Baby, please . . . you’re killing me!” he groaned, feeling light-headed by this point. He both wanted to leave his cock in her mouth forever and pull out before he passed out. Bliss, utter and complete, was what he felt. His wife—the woman who’d once told him she didn’t have experience with oral sex—was a goddamn prodigy. A skill such as hers wasn’t something you learned; she was born to suck cock—his cock. When she sat up beside him and licked her lips, he wondered if this was the one moment he’d remember forever. Had he really just fallen in love with his wife over a phenomenal blowjob? They said you know when it happens and he was half afraid this would be the story he’d never be able to relay to their kids. But he’d damn sure think about it again and again as a defining moment in their relationship.

  Chapter Ten

  Another month passed and Lydia was blissfully happy—with the exception of one thing. Or one person . . . Chris. The other woman had indeed changed her methods and was attempting to embody the catch more flies with honey than with vinegar approach. She’d had her lawyer withdraw her papers seeking sole custody of Casey and was doing everything possible to get into Jake’s good graces. And dammit, Jake was oblivious to her latest tactics. Lydia was sitting at one of the picnic tables that were placed around Danvers headquarters for its employees, having lunch with Crystal. It was so nice outside today that they’d picked up some sandwiches and brought them here to eat away from the hustle and bustle of the midday crowd. Mia had to take a last-minute support call but planned to join them soon. “So how’s life with Mr. Big treating you?” Lydia joked as she took a drink of her tea. She still thought of the character from Sex in the City whenever she saw Mark, and she didn’t think that would ever change. She wasn’t attracted to him at all in that way, but she could certainly appreciate the appeal of a rich and powerful man who was hot to boot.

  “Mark is amazing,” Crystal replied softly. “We just mesh so well.” Lowering her voice, she added, “Our sex life always surprises me. After a few months, I would have expected that I’d know it all, but he’s so—creative. Plus, he wants me all the time. Like even right after we’ve done it. Sometimes, we go again.”

  Lydia smiled at the incredulous tone of her friend’s voice. Funnily enough, she could easily relate to what she was saying because Jake was the same way. He could and did spend hours touchin
g every inch of her skin before going for round two. She found herself in a constant state of sexual awareness where he was concerned. Her body was so attuned to him that it was almost scary. One look or touch and her clit was throbbing and her panties wet. “I’m guessing you aren’t complaining about his libido.” Lydia giggled as Crystal blushed.

  “Not in the least,” Crystal agreed before adding, “but we both certainly had a buzz kill last night. We had our parents over for dinner.”

  “Yikes.” Lydia cringed. She knew from Crystal how overbearing her mother was. Crystal had also told her about the struggles Mark’s father had with addiction. She couldn’t imagine it was a relaxing evening.

  Shaking her head, Crystal said, “It was painful. Mark’s parents were actually enjoyable. They’re doing really well, and his dad is still hanging in there with his sobriety. My mother was a different story. She’s tried to be better lately, but sometimes, that’s met with varying degrees of success. Last night was not one of her better efforts. She kept referring to Mark as slick. As in, ‘How much did this house set you back, slick?’ Mark is really patient with her and doesn’t appear to get offended, but it’s embarrassing to me. It would be like some one-woman comedy show if most of her humor wasn’t so insulting.”

  “I swear, doesn’t anyone observe the lunch hour anymore?” called out a disgruntled voice from somewhere nearby. Both Lydia and Crystal swung around to see Mia stalking toward them. “The install my team did at Beach Villas last week went flawlessly. Trust me; you know how OCD I am that everything is in order. But their manager is driving me nuts! She is calling, like, ten times a day. ‘I don’t think my dial tone is working correctly.’ Or, ‘When I hit the button for the speakerphone, everyone in the room can hear my conversation.’ Geez, of course they can. That’s what a speaker does!” Lydia was dying laughing, and Crystal was holding her sides as their friend continued to give them crazy examples of the calls that she had been getting. “I’m telling you. There isn’t enough support to help her out.”